TNA No Surrender PPV
September 8, 2007
Orlando, Fla. at Universal Studios
Report by Ryan J. Schwimmer, PWTorch contributor

Hello and welcome to my first PPV review for PWTorch.com

(1) TNA Tag Team Title Match: Kurt Angle & Sting (C) vs. Team Pacman, Ron "The Truth" Killings & Pacman Jones. We're starting TNA's No Surrender right off with the Tag Title match featuring Angle & Sting versus Team Pacman. Why do I think Pacman is going to end up with the pin in this match without seeing any actual action? Pac tags Truth in before the match even really starts, surprise surprise. Truth vs. Sting. Decent action so far. My wife just said she really wants Truth to trip and fall when he tries to "kip-up." I agree. Truth looks for a tag and Pacman quite hilariously waves him off. Truth takes on Angle now, asking him "You want some of this?" Angle says, "Yes," and they wrestle for a while before Truth looks for another tag. Pacman jumps off the apron and waves him off again. They get chased around the ring, Pacman looks like he's running from the law. Karen Angle comes out, Sting yells at her. She fakes leaving, and comes back to the apron. Sting yells at her some more, and Karen shoves him twice and then slaps him. Sting points and tells her to go back. Karen falls over. Wait, what just happened? Oh, Sting slapped her when he pointed back toward the ramp. Karen's whining. I think my earlier prediction is going to come true. Angle tags out and checks on Karen. Sting is in the ring and Pacman gets tagged in. Stare down between Pacman and Sting as Karen Angle tells Kurt that Sting hit her. Angle gets angry and delivers the Angle Slam to Sting. Pacman gets the pin. New tag champions.

WINNERS: Team Pacman, new TNA Tag Team Champions. Boring and predictable, obviously. It's really funny how people have been complaining about the deteriorating title situation in TNA, saying that one person should not hold all of the belts, and they've just done the one thing for the tag division that could have made it worse.

Rhino gives an interview with JB in the back. Typical Rhino. "Yes, I'm an alcoholic, but I'm sober and you suck and alcohol is worse and you've ruined my family and something about a GORE, GORE, GORE!" Then we get a re-cap of the James Storm videos over the past few weeks, which if I were rating promos I'd give a 5/5. I really hate this feud, but I love those promos.

(2) James Storm (w/Jacquelyn) vs. Rhino. James Storm comes out first with Jacquelyn. Jackie has a regular cowboy hat on today. I wonder if someone finally told her that the design on her old hat was a Confederate flag and she realized she probably shouldn't be wearing it as a black woman. Anyway, Rhino comes out next and chases down Storm out of the ring. The first starts going through the crowd, typical Rhino stuff. Rhino crashes Storm through one of the walls on the outside. I wonder how many of those TNA goes through in a month. After a few minutes they finally get in the ring and the match officially starts. This is basically the same match we've seen the past few months, with Jackie jumping up to the apron to try and distract the referee quite often and belly-to-belly suplexes. Fast forward a few minutes and Rhino hits the gore on James Storm, who kicks out. Rhino is very surprised. There is now a chair in the ring. And then a fan hands Rhino his chair. That's two chairs, if you're counting. Chairs are flat and stacked on each other as Rhino looks like he's going to piledrive Storm on them from the turnbuckle, which would have been too cool so it didn't happen. Instead, James Storm does an RKO/Diamond Cutter/whatever it's called this week on top of them. Rhino kicked out. Now we have a table in the ring, which Rhino is taking way too long to set up in the corner. Rhino to the top again and Storm stops him. Middle-rope superplex by Storm. There's the Gore through the table. Thanks, Don West. We get that Rhino likes to say Gore three times, we don't need you to do it also.

WINNER: Sober Rhino, who… wait, is now pulling out the mini-keg. And now James Storm is about to get a beer enema, but Jackie interrupts. Wow, Gore to Jackie, and it looked nasty. Props to her. I guess violence against women is okay on pay per view but not on Spike. As typical as this match was, it was still very entertaining. I would have really liked to have seen James Storm's reaction if he actually got the beer enema though.

Recap of Team Pacman winning the Tag Titles earlier. "TNA" chants for who know's what. Kurt's yelling at Dr. Nash in the back, saying that they lost the tag titles because Sting slapped his wife. Dr. Nash is telling the story how Karen slapped Sting first and Sting comes in and is choking Angle. They yell at each other before Jim Cornette's annoying voice comes in and tells Sting to go to the hotel. Cornette kicks Karen out of the arena also. Karen's reaction is very nicely done, screaming hysterically. Don West's tie is almost as bad as his announcing. It's like a maze, and I really want to complete it. Two matches in and we're just now getting mention of the "huge announcement." Re-cap of Roode vs. Kaz.

(3) Robert Roode (w/Ms. Brooks) vs. Kazarian. This could be a good matchup. So far it looks like they're blending Kaz's nice X-Division tactics and Roode's more technical styles nicely. Ms. Brooks is ogling Kaz at ringside. Roode's playing the boring heel and Kaz is playing the boring face. No edge to either of these characters really. Roode tries for the fisherman's suplex early and Kaz reverses. They both go to the outside and Ms. Brooks doesn't know who to check on first. The answer, apparently, is no one. Roode tries to throw Kaz to Ms. Brooks. He stops, but then Roode comes over and knocks them both over. The Chief Executive Offender looks offended. Roode just asked Brooks what her problem is. She's holding her wrist because of the earlier bump. "Boring" chants from the crowd. I tend to disagree, it's a decent match, just not the bump-fest that TNA fans look for, I guess. Nice couple of rollups by Kaz for 2-counts, followed by a very nice enziguri. Ms. Brooks is doing a very nice job of playing both sides. Roode has Brass Knuckles or a chain or something. Kaz kicks it out, very nicely done. Roode wants Brooks to get it, and she's conflicted. Another couple of rollups by Kaz, the first of which you could hear Roode say "Oh, S*&t." Brooks now has the chain at ringside, but she kicked it under the ring and Roode is very confused. He's frantically looking for it, and this is an obvious set up for a suicide dive by Kaz. And there it is, but Roode pulls Brooks in front of him and Kaz stops. There's the suicide flip, very nicely done and it actually for once did not look forced or overly planned. "TNA" chants. Kaz kisses Brooks hand. Roode pulls the classic Flair begging for mercy thing. Nice springboard DDT by Kaz from the apron inside the ring. Roode kicks out. Awful camera work so we don't see a nice finishing move by Kaz. Two-count only though surprisingly. "One More Time" chants from the crowd. We're up on the turnbuckle and Roode reverses Kaz. Knife-Edge chops being exchanged. X-Factor from the top rope. Two count again for Kaz. The camera work here is worse than normal for TNA. Kaz on the top rope, big leg drop missed. Roode with the Payoff for the win.

WINNER: Robert Roode. Started off a little slow but picked up very nicely towards the end. The match went a little long too, which was good. If they deliver longer, better quality matches like this when they move to two hours, we're in for a treat.

Black Machismo promo. Very annoying, VERY STALE. When is this going to end? Dr. Nash is out there but I couldn't hear what he said. I think he's trying to get Angle out of the X-Title match. Does anyone else get incredibly tired of turning the TV up and down during promos and matches during TNA? Their production quality is awful. Oh, Nash told Lethal to take a dive in the next match.

(4) TNA X-Division Title Match: Kurt Angle (C) vs. "Black Machismo" Jay Lethal. Kurt comes out looking none-too-happy. Lethal comes out to, from what I can tell, almost no reaction from the crowd. Oh, now they're all swaying their arms along to the music. This is so lame. "Let's Go Angle/Let's Go Lethal" chants. The announcers are playing into the "Lethal wasn't pinned or submitted as X-Division Champion" thing. Angle is overpowering Jay Lethal. Double sledgehammer from the top by Lethal finally. Decent technical-wrestling match here. Double clothesline and both men are down for the count. Lethal's finally putting some X-Division style into the match, but not for long as Angle's now overpowering him again. Ready for the Angle Slam? Not this early. Lethal's on the top rope and we get the ever-impressive running belly-to-belly off the top from Angle for a two-count. Lethal reversed the Ankle Lock and rollwed Angle up. German suplexes…and a second… and three for a two count. Don West is yelling entirely too loud. Lethal reverses the angle slam into an arm drag. Lethal Combination, but he's not pinning. Going for the flying elbow, got it, and Kurt kicked out. Another German suplex, released after one. Angle slam reversed again, but now the Ankle lock is in. Roll-up, and Lethal wins.

MATCH WINNER: "Black Machismo" Jay Lethal, new X-Division Champion, who is now being congratulated by Petey Williams, Sharkboy, and the Guru Dutt. Decent action, it's nice to see Kurt Angle wrestle this type of match.

JB is interviewing Black Reign, who has a rat. This is stupid. JB with the line of the night: "Um, that's a rat." ………………………………………………………… Sorry, I fell asleep on the "." Button. Nice, I paused this earlier so I can fast forward through this stupid re-cap.

(5) No-Disqualification Match: "Black Reign" Dustin Runnels-Rhodes-dust vs. Chris Harris. Earlier, I mentioned I hated the James Storm vs. Rhino feud. I'd watch it all over instead of this stuff. The announcers are, for some reason, reminding us how sick and twisted Dustin Rhodes is. A few minutes into the match, and nothing interesting has happened. Mike Tenay just commented on the total domination by Black Reign, even though he's only been on the offensive for the past thirty seconds or so. I'm hearing three chants from the crowd: "Let's go Black Reign," "Let's go Wildcat," and "Boring." I agree with the third. I don't care what anyone says, I don't think Chris Harris has ‘it' outside of America's Most Wanted. Chris Harris gets a roll-up pin but Black Reign has the knife-thing. Chris Harris gets the upper hand and has handcuffs now. Dustin's bleeding. I think I'm going to take a short nap. I'll have my wife wake me up when this is over.

MATCH WINNER: Chris Harris. Lame, lame, lame. Stupid. Lame. Dumb. Boring. Oh, Dustin Rhodes-dust magically has a key to the handcuffs and is beating down Chris Harris now. Black Reign has a pet rat named Misty and now he's out of the cage. Please tell me this rat isn't going in Wildcat's pands. Nope, just on his face. Mike Tenay, Don West, and Dustin Rhodes are all yelling, but I don't think there are any words coming out.

The Christian Coalition in the back. Christian's wondering why he's a bad guy. Funny stuff. Tomko and A.J. are just as funny as Christian while he's talking with their expressions and reactions to what he's saying. And here's my weekly reminder from my wife that A.J. needs to shave. Christian's giving Tomko the night off because of his big match later, and A.J. looks confused as he's in that match too. Typically good promo by them.

(6) Tag Team Gauntlet match for TNA Tag Team Championship Number-One Contender ship: I guess we're having people come out in 60-second intervals. A.J. vs. Christopher Daniels to start. What an excellent way to get this started. Typical excellent action between these two in just a minute. Best 60 seconds of the night so far. Next entrant: Homicide. How awesome would a triple-threat match with these three be? Awesome action here. A.J. and Chris Daniels double-teaming Homicide. Chris Sabin is in next. And again, how awesome would a fatal-four way be with these four? TNA has such an excellent stable of young superstars. Eyepokes for everyone from Sabin. Have they ever explained why Sabin & Shelley point to their hands? Next in is Havoc, or Johnny Devine if you will. Man, I love the X-Division. Havoc just laid A.J. out with what the announcers called a "Handle-lock slam" and it was really cool. Homicide eliminated as Petey Williams comes out and immediately delivers a Canadian Destroyer. It has been WAY too long since we've seen that. Sabin eliminated as Brother Devon comes out to ruin the match. The crowd is chanting for Devon, aren't 3D supposed to be heels? And I wonder if Devon is going to be in trouble when they institute a drug policy. Jimmy Rave comes in, who is "returning" to TNA, and is escorted by Christy Hemme, who last time I checked, no one cares about. Rave landed a nice twisting armbar on A.J. Brother Ray comes out and is actually acting like a heel. In case you're counting, 3D is the first full team in the match. Havoc eliminated. I wonder if 3D booked this match, because Ray came in manhandling just about everyone. This is getting boring all of a sudden. 3D are trying to make themselves look like supermen and it's dumb. Raven comes out, but his teammate Havoc was just eliminated, and there goes Raven already. Took a nasty bump to the outside. Seratonin completely eliminated now. Sharkboy comes out. Brother Ray eliminates Sharkboy and looks like Superman doing it. Sonjay comes out throwing flower petals while running at full speed with a big smile on his face. Jimmy Rave eliminated, Petey Williams, Sonjay's teammate, also eliminated. 3D is still looking like Supermen and it's really dumb. A.J. with a nice flying forearm to Brother Ray finally. BG James, or Road Dogg Jesse James, comes out with voodoo chick. What was a really nice X-Division tag team battle royal has turned slightly boring because of 3D. Hernandez comes out, but Homicide was the first one eliminated. Hernandez is also overpowering people but it's much more entertaining than 3D doing it. Brother Ray is now wearing Sonjay's headband for some reason. Tomko comes out, and his partner Styles is still in. 3D double-teaming Tomko. Tomko essentially eliminated 3D by himself, with help from 3D themselves. Stare-down with Hernandez and Tomko broken up by A.J. and Chris Daniels. Elix Skipper is in to team with Chris Daniels, so I guess Senshi is being held out of this. That's a stupid move in my opinion. Alex Shelley comes out, and Sabin was eliminated a long time ago. Again with the hand-pointing. Road Dogg or BG James eliminated. Christy Hemme comes out with Lance Hoyt and they make out and no one cares because Lance Hoyt is like a woman, but an ugly, disturbing one. I guess he's that Jimmy Rave guy's teammate. Elix Skipper eliminated, and hit his head really freaking hard on the apron because Lance Hoyt is an idiot and can't wrestle. Kip James is coming out now. Sonjay eliminated.

To re-cap, we're now looking at Hoyt, Hernandez, A.J., Daniels, Shelley, Tomko, and Kip. Eric Young comes out with no pyro to scare him. He is Sharkboy's teammate but Sharkboy's been gone. Young looks out of shape. Young is putting headlocks on everyone and laughing. Hernandez and Tomko are fighting and this could be really good. Tomko throws Hernandez out. LAX is out. EY eliminates Tomko and is showing everyone his muscles now. Girlie-Man Lance Hoyt eliminated. Daniels and Kip out. XXX is out, VKM is out. Shelley, Eric Young, and A.J. left. Once we're down to two, we have a regular match. Shelley and Styles were trying to win Young over, and are now double teaming him. A lot of near-elims here. EY out. Down to Shelley and Styles for the pinfall matchup. Correction, now the partners are coming out to wrestle a tag team match for the #1 Contender ship.

(6b) #1 Contenders to the TNA Tag Team Titles Match: Christian's Coalition (A.J. Styles & Tomko) vs. Motor City Machineguns (Alex Shelley & Chris Sabin). I don't know where A.J. is but there are some nice double-team moves from the MCMG. Nice flipping reverse DDT by A.J., who showed up and tagged in from no where it seems like. Shelley with a sick splash on A.J., and now a suicide dive to Tomko on the outside. Pele kick! A.J. gets the pin for him and Tomko.

WINNERS: Christian's Coalition (A.J. Styles & Tomko), #1 Contenders to the TNA Tag Team Titles. Very exciting battle royal-style matchup.

Samoa Joe in the back with his Samoans. Apparently he's mad because Christian beat up a Samoan guy. Yeah, he must be mad because he's yelling. Decent promo from Samoan Elvis, even though it ended a little stupid with him yelling and spitting on the camera lens.

(7) Samoa Joe vs. Christian Cage. We have Samoan Dancers and a Samoan with a microphone. Joe's still mad. Beat down on Christian early. Joe slams Christian into the guard rail. Don West: "He doesn't want to beat him, he wants to break him." Thanks DW, we know we can always count on you. Christian into the guard rail again. Nice kick to Christian's head as he was trying to get in the ring, followed by a suicide dive by Joe. Christian finally with some offense. Divided crowd again, with "Let's Go Christian/Let's go Joe" chants. Joe goes for the back splash but Christian gets his knees up. This match feels like it's dragging a little, but it might just be because it is following the very high-paced action from the 10-team battle royal. Joe went for the Rear-Naked Clutch, reversed into the Unprettier, reversed again and Christian's going for the frog splash. Missed. Joe has an STF on Christian, and the fans are now yelling "John Cena Sucks." Christian rolled him over while still in the hold for a two-count, forcing Joe to break the hold. Muscle Buster? Christian wiggles out but gets a powerslam for his troubles. Joe is trying to do a top-rope Samoan drop and almost dropped Christian out of the ring. Christian ends up reversing into a top-rope Reverse DDT. Unprettier reversed into Kamino Clutch. Christian tried to roll Joe up while the choke was on, but he had his feet on the rope. Christian grabs the ropes legally this time. Rudy Charles grabbed Joe's hair to pull him off and he wouldn't let go. Joe gives the Samoan Drop to Rudy Charles. No ref now, Muscle Buster to Christian. Security coming out and getting manhandled. Other refs come out and call the DQ. Joe is still taking care of security. Now Petey, Sonjay, and Lethal come out. Joe throws them out of the ring. Way to bury the X-Division, TNA. Joe is now hanging Christian, essentially. Matt Morgan and Jim Cornette come out and Morgan threw Joe off Christian. Stare-down… Joe's music sounds, and he flips off Morgan and Cornette. Hope there are no kids out here.

WINNER: Christian Cage via DQ. A little bit of a letdown, but decent. Joe went crazy, and it'll be interesting to see where his character goes from here.

Kurt Angle just trashed the set in the back. Angle drops an S-bomb as he yells at Dr. Nash. Angle shoving Nash, saying he doesn't need anyone and telling him to go to Hell. Tenay is in the ring for the big announcement.

BIG ANNOUNCEMENT: Video Package. Nice highlights from the past five years. Surprise, surprise, TNA is going to two hours on October 4th, 9-11pm Eastern. "TNA" Chants. Why is Don West yelling again?

Team Pacman in the back. Pacman says they have to go to his hometown of Atlanta for Bound to Glory. Pretty sure it's called Bound For Glory. We get yet another re-cap of the new Tag Team Champions. Now they're showing Angle lose to Lethal.

(8) TNA World Heavyweight Championship Match: Kurt Angle (C) vs. Abyss. JB introduces the competitors. Earl Hebner refereeing. JB just doesn't have the electrifying element that Michael "MVP is straight-up ballin'" Buffer has when announcing these main events. Earl Hebner just guaranteed us no outside interference, including from Mrs. Angle. Gee, I wonder if anyone's stupid enough to fall for that. Divided crowd again, but is it even worth mentioning at this point? Abyss just patted Kurt on the head like a puppy. Good comic relief from Angle at this point, trying to run away even though Abyss has his tights held. Angle to the outside. A grown man in the front row is cackling at Kurt Angle like the Wicked Witch of the West. He should be embarrassed. Angle has the upper hand for the first time in the match now, going after Abyss's knees. The crowd is getting behind Abyss as he's in a leg wrench. "You Suck" chants directed at Kurt, reminiscent of his WWE theme song of course. A lot of Ric Flair-style knee chops from Kurt. I think the count is around six or seven at this point. It looks very painful, even though Abyss isn't selling it very well. He's pretending to limp around the ring and it just looks silly. Angle's shoulder into the turnbuckle. Shock Treatment out of nowhere on Angle. Two-count. Chokeslam reversed and rolled up. Two count on Abyss. Abyss isn't even bothering to sell the bad knee any more. Impressive German Suplex on Abyss. Chokeslam on Angle. A little while ago Abyss couldn't even lift Angle because of his knee. Howe we're seeing a vertical suplex, Shock Treatment, A couple chokeslams. This is stupid. Anglesault on Abyss, and it was pretty. Angle's tearing Abyss's boot off to try to hurt him further. Men undressing men? Seems a little more fitting for Hard Justice. Abyss wears white socks. Now we're on the ankle and not the knee, which makes sense. You know, people make fun of John Cena for long-term selling, but Abyss is just, dare I say, abysmal. Black Hole Slam on Angle. Two-count. Angle reversed a Tombstone to the Ankle Lock. Abyss is reaching for the rope but Angle keeps pulling him back. Very nicely done here. Angle finally locks it in with his legs. Abyss won't tap. Abyss tapped the mat once and Hebner called it. Still making a living of screwing people out of matches. The announcers will not stop saying "Courageous," and it's getting annoying.

WINNER: Kurt Angle, still TNA World Heavyweight Champion. A decent match, but Abyss's lack of selling was really disturbing. This was about the match I expected, and while some fans will find that Kurt Angle's focusing on Abyss's knee was boring, I thought it was well done, again except for Abyss's half of it.

James Mitchell is now on the screen, saying Abyss's chariot to Hell has now arrived. Someone is sawing through the mat, grabbing Abyss, and is pulling him in. Bound For Glory promo, and end tape.

OVERALL PAY-PER-VIEW RATING (7.0): An above-average TNA PPV. 3D ruined what could have been a perfect 5/5 10-team battle royal. Angle walks out the World Champion, and loses the other two titles. Not bad at all though.

I hope everyone enjoyed this review, and I'll be back next week with WWE Unforgiven. E-mail me with questions, comments, or reviews of my review! Xenorye@cox.net.

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