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WWE Smackdown review
September 21, 2007
Taped 9/18/07 in Atlanta, Ga.
Aired on The CW
Report by Greg Parks, Torch Team Contributor


-Tonight, we celebrate the Season Premiere of Smackdown. Oh, and Teddy and Kristal’s wedding.

-Maria is our host tonight, as she’s backstage with the Ying Yang Twins. They make noises until Coach and Vince McMahon were introduced. Maria asked about Vince’s son, and he said he’s not here. Coach sucks up to the boys until he mentions them as the “Kings of Country.”

-Smackdown Open. Ric Flair is still in the opening.

-Batista came out to a good pop. He said he was feeling good. Batista said he was privileged and proud to compete against Rey Mysterio at Unforgiven. The champ said Great Khali has invoked his re-match clause, and he will face Batista for the title in a Punjabi Prison Match at No Mercy. This announcement brought out Mark Henry. Apparently, Undertaker returns to Smackdown next week against Henry. He wanted a warm-up match for next week, and even insisted the belt not be on the line. “You are as stupid as you are ugly” said Batista. He accepted Henry’s challenge.

-Rey Mysterio, in action, tonight!

[Break]

-Maria, backstage with The Ying Yang Twins, was joined by Intercontinental Champion Jeff Hardy, who dressed up for the occasion- no body paint evident. The four then started dancing because, hey, it’s a party.

1- JIMMY WANG YANG VS. JAMIE NOBLE
Lock-up in the center of the ring, and Noble got a quick advantage. That is, until Yang hit a headscissor and used his educated feet to get Noble off-balance. Chop in the corner, followed by an attempt at the 10-punch in the corner. Noble used the ropes to his advantage, taking Yang down. Bodyslam by Noble, working that left arm of the redneck. Heel kick by Noble for a two-count. Atomic drop started Yang’s comeback, and he hit a version of the enziguiri for a near-fall. Noble “hit” a big boot out of the corner that appeared to show some light. Noble saw someone short with a Hornswaggle hat at ringside, but it was just Shannon Moore tricking him. Yang flew off the top onto Noble at ringside, taking advantage of the distraction. Back in, moonsault off the top and the win for Yang!

WINNER: Yang at 4:57.

-Backstage, MVP was gripping a football, getting in his zone, while Matt Hardy bugged him. They were having a “throw the ball through a tire” contest. Matt did much better than MVP. MVP tried to get them to focus on their tag match, which is next.

-Also tonight, Batista will face Mark Henry.

[Break]

2- MATT HARDY & MVP VS. DEUCE ‘N DOMINO
Hey, another Unforgiven re-match. Is the tag division this thin? I guess this is a non-title match. The champs argued about who would start things off, and Deuce ending up attacking MVP. Porter came back with a toss, then tagged Matt. Double-team, well almost, but MVP decided to go for the early clothesline instead. Swinging neckbreaker by Matt for a near-fall. Tag to MVP and another double-team attempt went awry. Deuce fought back, but got a drop-toe hold for his troubles. The heels were in control as we went to break.

[Break]

The show returned with Domino dominating MVP. Domino dragged MVP into their corner, tagged Deuce, who tagged MVP with a right-hand. Double-team with Domino holding MVP up for a suplex and Deuce coming off the top to help slam him....wasn’t that a finishing move of some tag team back in the day? MVP crawled to make the tag, but Deuce held him back. Back on his feet, Porter hit an enziguiri. Domino tagged in, but so did Matt. He began to take Domino apart, and hit the elbow to the back of the neck, then back-body dropping Deuce. Bulldog out of the corner while clotheslining the other heel member. MVP wanted a tag, but Matt wasn’t going to give it to him. Side-Effect on Domino, and he set up for his finisher, while MVP tried to tag himself in. Neckbreaker by Hardy after Domino took out MVP accidentally. MVP and Matt had a shoving match in mid-ring, which allowed Deuce to roll up Matt for the win.

WINNERS: Deuce ‘N Domino at 10:00.

-Backstage, Teddy’s wedding party was getting ready. Butch Reed gave a little speech to Teddy, and asked how he got a girl like Kristal. The reverend (who looked like Cedric The Entertainer, plus 50 pounds) arrived and talked to Teddy as well.

[Break]

-Rey Mysterio came out for an interview, conducted by Michael Cole. Rey congratulated Batista for becoming champion. He said he’ll hold that belt once again. The conversation turned toward Chavo, and Rey said injuring Chavo was redemption. At this point, JBL intervened, accusing Cole of tossing Rey softball questions. JBL called Rey a disgrace to the country and a disgrace to the show. Rey told JBL he “retired your ass.” Rey challenged JBL to a fight, and JBL began un-dressing for their battle. But JBL stopped short, saying his contract as an announcer prohibits him from beating up the superstars. JBL had another opponent in mind: Finlay. The Irishman decked Rey with the microphone and left him lying in the ring.

[Break]

-The Raw Rebound aired.

-The Ying Yang Twins and Maria were joined backstage by Jimmy Yang and Carlito. Carlito high-tailed it when Chuck Palumbo brought his motorcycle into the picture.

-Batista vs. Mark Henry, next!

[Break]

-A DivaSearch recap aired.

-The camera showed Kristal’s wedding party backstage.

-Mark Henry and Batista came out for their match.

[Break]

3- MARK HENRY VS. BATISTA
Henry went on the attack early, pinning Batista in the corner. Batista worked out though, and hit a clothesline that took the behemoth off his feet. Henry came back with two big splashes in the corner. Bodyslam by the self-proclaimed “Silverback.” A rest-hold by Henry lasted for about a minute. Batista came back with a shoulderblock off the middle rope, then a spinebuster. Batista was feeling it until Great Khali’s music hit. Batista went after him, but still hit a spear on Henry, who went outside the ring. The distraction allowed Khali to go to work. In the ring, Batista was hit with a big boot, then the vice grip was applied.

WINNER: No Contest (possibly a DQ win for Batista or a count-out, no finish announced) at 2:55.

[Break]

-The wedding began next, with Reverend Bruce Bruce (BET host) coming down first, followed by superstars from all three brands. Even some agents came out- Mike Rotunda (as IRS), Arn Anderson, Pat Patterson, Dean Malenko, Gerry Brisco and Sarge (in fatigues). Hornswaggle came from under the ring with his own chair and a phone book to sit on....and he took his seat right next to Coach.

[Break]

Teddy Long walked to the ring, getting congratulations from superstars on his way down. Antoine Long, Theodore’s son, Butch Reed, Ron Simmons, Michelle McCool, Torrie Wilson and Vickie Guerrero were groomsmen/bridesmaids, in case you were scoring at home. Then Kristal came down. Jagged Edge played “Let’s Get Married” live for the couple. After they played, and before the show could go on, Jillian Hall interrupted. She threatened to sing an original song, and got a few bars out before Candice and Mickie restrained her and dragged her to the back. As the wedding went on, Hornswaggle caused a scene in the front row and even got a “Horn-Swag-Gle” chant. As they were exchanging I do’s, The Godfather’s music hit, and he brought some ho’s out. The crowd didn’t seem to react to the music at first. Godfather reminisced about the good times he, Ron and Teddy used to have. Teddy declined whatever invitation Godfather was thinking of. So he offered someone else a ride on the ho train. Ron almost accepted. All the other male wrestlers seemed to want to ride though. In fact, they all left with the Godfather. Those are going to be four busy women. As they got to the big part, Hornswaggle jumped in the ring and under Kristal’s dress. Coach followed, trying to nab him. The scene ended with Vince and Coach chasing the guy backstage. Kristal could barely keep herself together. As he was about to say “I do,” Teddy acted out what appeared to be a sudden (and I mean SUDDEN) heart attack. The bridesmaids tried to get Kristal under control as everyone stood over Teddy and the medics as the show ended.

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