Email This Article - Contact Us - VIP Sign-Up - Back to Home Page

|

We start with a graphic announcing tonight's Alliance/Coalition Summit. I'm impressed that TNA has enough faith in their audience to trust us to keep up with current events.

Borash is in the back, and he hears talking in a stairwell. Christian Cage is telling Robert Roode, whom he calls Bobby, how he can't trust anybody. He says that AJ and Tomko stabbed him in the back, and that Booker T's here for his (Roode's) spot. Roode goes up in my estimation for talking about how TNA has become a revolving door of has-beens, as does TNA for letting him say it. He also says that he'll teach Booker T a lesson here tonight.

[Opening Credits]

Booker T makes his way to the ring for his first interview in the Impact Zone. We'll hear for the first time why Booker came to TNA—I'm betting on "blah blah blah thank you blah blah blah competition blah blah blah future of wrestling blah blah blah great fans blah blah blah championship." The crowd is still loving them their Booker T. Booker says that everyone wants to know why he left WWE, and someone has the brains to start a "they suck" chant. He thanks the crowd, then says that TNA is where wrestling is going, that he's here for some great competition, that he's going to elevate the company, and that he wants the title. Hell, I got the order wrong. He asks if we can dig that, sucka. Robert Roode's music hits—it was nice of him to wait for Booker to finish. Roode says that Booker's not welcome in TNA because Roode's been moving his way up the ladder only to keep getting cut off by has-beens. That's not such a horrible point. Roode suggests they have a match, leaving their skanks in the back, at which point Booker stands up for his wife. Sharmell holds him back, but then Roode calls her a tramp, and for some reason that's the last straw.

[Commercial Break]

Crystal is in the back with team The Rock and Rave Infection, which is apparently what we're calling the team of Christy Hemme, Lancy Hoyt, and Jimmy Rave. They're upset that LAX got away with having a man hit a woman when the mystery member of the Latino Nation attacked Christy two weeks ago. I thought they'd forgotten about that plot. Christy yells at Jimmy Rave; I could figure out neither what he did nor why I should care.

(1) Eric Young & Gail Kim defeat Christy Hemme & Jimmy Rave

Eric Young is rocking the World Drinking Title he won off James Storm at Genesis. I seriously hope they start defending that belt. The crowd is fairly behind him, but I'm not sure that says much when you're in the ring with Jimmy Rave. Rave hits a cool tilt-a-whirl-armbar, but Young is able to lift Rave's whole body with the caught arm and plant him on the top turnbuckle. The heels get the edge when Hoyt trips up Young, but Young eventually fights them both off and gets the hot tag to Gail Kim. Kim is her normal awesome self, and wins the match with a rollup.

After the match, Storm comes out and challenges him to a rematch for the drinking title. Well, that hope came true sooner than I expected.

[Commercial Break]

(2) Eric Young defeats James Storm in a speed-drinking contest.

Tenay says that this is more about pride than anything else…apparently as opposed to the large cash prizes that normally go along with drinking contests. The final score is 6-5 Young. After the match, Storm smashes a beer bottle over Young's head, and damn that's a lot of blood pouring out. Storm picks him up and lands a stiff chair shot to the head that at least appeared to be hands-free by Young. Then he nails the Eye of the Storm and claims the belt.

Borash is in the back with Tomko and Styles, and he wants to know if everyone will be able to work together in tonight's main event of Styles, Tomko, Angle, and Cage vs. Joe, Kaz, Abyss, and Scott Steiner. Tomko doesn't think Kurt and Christian will be able to work together, but Styles points out that Nicole Richie and Paris Hilton got back together, as did Van Halen and David Lee Roth. Tomko complains that Styles has been watching too much TMZ.

[Commercial Break]

We run down the lineup for the PPV, and then recap the Team 3D-Motor City Machine Guns feud. It kind of defeats the purpose of getting an extra hour if you spend it all on recaps.

(3) Team 3D defeats Sonjay Dutt & "Black Machismo" Jay Lethal in a Street Fight

When did street fights stop being based out of Chicago? Johnny Devine comes down the ramp to distract Lethal and Dutt as Team 3D attack from behind to start. They brawl out to the crowd, where Lethal hits a cool splash from atop the balcony and Dutt hits a Springboard Body Press off the ropes. Neat.

[Commercial Break]

We get back just in time to see Brother Ray eat a 450 Splash from Dutt and a Savage Elbow from Lethal. Dutt stands around counting as Devon breaks up the cover, which is a little weird. Lethal just flings a trash can at Ray, and then Dutt provides your holy shit moment of the night by hitting a Somersault Van Terminator on Devon in the corner. Lethal goes to the top once too often and is caught by a kendo stick from Johnny Devine, and Dutt gets caught in a 3D for the loss.
After the match Devon starts beating down Dutt with his belt in the corner, and Brother Ray goes after Lethal with some nunchucks, apparently trying out his new gimmick of being a Ninja Turtle. Sabin and Shelley run out and chase off the various evildoers.

Styles is in Angle's office, begging him to come to the peace summit with Christian. Angle says there's nothing to talk about, since Styles and Tomko are part of the Angle Alliance now. Styles said that Karen assured him that he could be part of both teams, so Kurt tells her that she'll have to go to the summit to work things out. Styles thinks that everything's coming together nicely; Tomko seems less convinced.

[Commercial Break]

Rellik's music hits, and I regret that my recapping duties prevent me from fast-forwarding.

(4) Rhino defeats Rellik

Someone in the crowd starts a "Let's go Rellik" chant, and it makes me wonder how often they're just screwing with me. These two actually work a competent old-schoolish wrestling match, but it's really hard for me to care. Rhino hits a Spinebuster followed by a Gore for a clean win. Reign attacks right after the match, and Abyss's music hits. I like the move of sending him out with music—it made it seem like a slightly bigger deal. Abyss chases everyone off.

Borash is in the back with Styles and Tomko; Styles is panicking and has to pee. Borash says that as part of the Angle family, he's learned a little something about TCB—taking care of business. That catchphrase is never getting over. They go into Christian's locker room, and he's ticked that it took them three weeks to come to him. He asks Tomko what he was thinking, and Tomko replies that Christian told him not to think. He got him there. He then berates AJ for screwing up everything as team captain. He dissolves the Coalition and tells AJ he's fired. Styles begs to keep his job, and says that it's not a big deal if he has two bosses, since he once worked for both his father and his aunt Bea…Tomko is priceless throughout this, showing progressively more exasperation throughout the promo. Eventually Christian agrees that there is one thing AJ can do, and sends him to summon Kurt Angle. AJ runs off, saying he'll get Karen, leaving Christian looking ticked and Tomko looking embarrassed.

[Commercial Break]

The summit is finally in session, with Karen Angle representing The Angle Alliance and AJ presiding as chairman. He asks Karen and Christian to shake hands for the benefit of mankind. He gets his handshake, and rubs in Tomko's face the fact that his plan worked. After the meeting breaks up, Christian grabs Karen tightly and says that he's only out to win, and that they better not screw him. That was…uncomfortable.

(5) Booker T (w/Sharmell) defeats Robert Roode (w/Ms. Brooks)

Booker hits a back kick and a Spinebuster before locking in the sleeper hold. I honestly cannot think of a single good reason for a face to use a sleeper in a short television match, particularly when it's that face's debut. It picks up pretty quickly though, and I have to say that Roode looks a little better against a more traditional opponent.

[Commercial Break]

Roode locks in some sort of chin lock, and I start to miss the good old days when Rellik was on TV. At least I understand the point of this one, as it gives the crowd a chance to rile themselves up with a "Booker T" chant. Roode gets frustrated when he can't keep Booker down, and has Ms. Brooks hand him a chair. I'm not sure when she started following orders again. He missed with the chair shot, and Booker nails a side kick and then the Scissors Kick for the win. That's 3 matches tonight that have ended with clean pins off finishing maneuvers, which has to be a record.
After the match Christian attacks with a chair. Sharmell gets in his face, but before Christian can respond Kaz comes down and cleans house.

Crystal is in the back with Steiner, who can neither remember her name nor understand the rules to his match on Sunday. He also questions why he's in an eight-man tag match tonight. So Steiner doesn't understand the rules of a match that doesn't make sense (see my forthcoming PPV preview), doesn't understand the main event tonight that doesn't make sense, and can't be bothered to remember the random interview girl's name—since when did Steiner make more sense than everyone else on the program? That can't be a good sign.

[Commercial Break]

They rundown the matches at Turning Point again. At least we don't yet have replays from "moments ago".

Christian comes out first. Now that Jericho's returned, shouldn't Christian give him his entrance back?

(6) Abyss, Scott Steiner, Samoa Joe, and Kaz defeat Kurt Angle, Christian Cage, AJ Styles & Tomko.

Kaz is just happy that people remember that he exists.

[Commercial Break]

AJ is so excited at ringside that he accidentally bounces into the ring. Then he realizes that he's in the ring with Scott Steiner and tags back in Tomko. Steiner wins the battle of big men and tags in Joe. Joe tags in Kaz for no obvious reason, and then Kaz accidentally sells a clear miss from Tomko. He gets the tag in to Abyss, who levels Tomko with a big boot. It's nice to see the faces isolate a member of the opposing team for once. Abyss gets too close to the wrong part of the ring and gets ambushed by the opposing team. Tomko is able to get Angle into the ring, and Abyss is in trouble for a few seconds before getting a tag to Steiner. Steiner is surprisingly quick, hitting anything that moves with a suplex. Kaz comes in and does fine till getting caught with a low blow from Christian Cage.

[Commercial Break]

Kaz is still in the ring, which is probably not good news for him. Angle tags out Christian with a blind tag, and Christian reluctantly cedes the ring. Kaz eventually hits a tornado DDT, and Joe comes in with what I assume is the real hot tag of the match. Sure enough, things break down, and we have ourselves a sequence of everyone hitting their signature moves faster than I can type. AJ, Christian, and Joe end up in the ring. Styles gets a thumb to the eye, and so when Christian sets Joe up for the Unprettier AJ accidentally catches him with a Pele. Joe hits the Muscle Buster for the pinfall win. Wow—make that four clean finishing move based wins tonight. The Outsiders come out to congratulate their partner.

Where We've Been:
Roode talked about how annoying it was that he worked his way up the ladder only to be cut off by the likes of Booker T and the Outsiders. I'm almost surprised the crowd didn't turn him face just for that. I don't happen to be much of a fan of Roode, and I don't think that seniority should be the deciding factor in who gets pushed, but it does seem like a lot of the TNA veterans are getting a raw deal here. Christopher Daniels had been on the cusp of the main event a few times, and if Abyss broke his back anymore for the company with lame storylines and entertaining matches he'd be, well, Kane. If Booker T can still get it done in the ring, that'll be one thing. However, if he lags a little I'll wager his honeymoon period with the fans doesn't make it to the January PPV, and then there might be a backlash coming.

Where We're Going:
Things change…except in TNA. As I was recapping tonight, it occurred to me how little was actually happening. Would anyone who missed the last two week's shows really need to check these recaps at all to get what's going on? We were unclear about the cohesiveness of the Coalition, and we're still unclear. Kim was taking the challenge to Awesome Kong, and she still is. Christy Hemme's team was annoyed about being ambushed by LAX, and they're still annoyed. Karen Angle had a screechy voice, and Hall & Nash were cool but kind of old. About the only thing that happened was James Storm turning on Eric Young, which I admit was kind of cool. Also Kaz and Robert Roode both became involved with Christian and Booker T, but I was watching and I still don't get why that happened. Maybe TNA went into water treading mode because the feared (apparently mistakenly) a marked drop in ratings over Thanksgiving, but that still doesn't explain why nothing happened today. There is a place in this world for episodic TV, but wrestling isn't it. One of the advantages of a wrestling program has always been that their multi-month arcs have allowed for slow burning and/or continually developing storylines, but that just doesn't seem to be happening now. I hadn't been watching for this, so I don't know if this is a new problem or something that's been brewing for a bit, but it's something I'll be keeping an eye on from here out.

Tonight's Show: This was not their best effort. Little of the wrestling really got better than okay till the last five minutes of the main event, and, as already discussed, nothing actually happened. However, extremely strong performances by Styles and Tomko in repeated promos and good work by Dutt and Lethal keep this ship somewhat afloat. B

Comment on this Article Below

(CLICK FOR COMMENTS RULES OR TO REPORT ABUSE) [an error occurred while processing this directive]

(CLICK FOR COMMENTS RULES OR TO REPORT ABUSE)

ALSO DISCUSS MORE SUBJECTS IN OUR PWTORCH FREE FORUM

For more BREAKING NEWS on WWE, TNA!
VISIT OUR AFFILIATE - PROWRESTLING.NET

For UFC NEWS & BLOGS:
VISIT OUR SISTER SITE - MMATORCH.COM

Upgrade to PWTORCH VIP: DETAILS & SIGN-UP INFO

(c) 1999-2009 TDH Communications Inc. - All rights reserved.