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WWE Smackdown review
March 7, 2008
Taped 3/4/08 in Cleveland, Oh.
Aired on the CW
Report by Greg Parks, Torch Team Contributor

-WWE Open.

-Smackdown Open.

-Edge and Vickie Guerrero (and Teddy Long) were already in the ring for “The Cutting Edge.” After complimenting Vickie, Edge noted that WrestleMania is shaping up to be quite depressing. He said Taker’s undefeated streak would come to an end and Ric Flair would be forced to retire. Looks like Edge is changing his message from “undefeated at WrestleMania” to “undefeated against Undertaker.” Vickie said Undertaker would face Edge, Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins in a 3-on-1 handicap match. “Baby, you are so hot when you’re making main event matches,” said Edge. That was pretty funny. The Rated R Superstar then brought out Ric Flair. Edge complimented Flair but said in three weeks, it’s over. Flair was confident he’d come out on top. The crowd chanted “You suck” at Edge. Edge talked about how Flair was one of the Undertaker’s victims at WrestleMania, and Flair didn’t seem confident that Edge could break the streak. Flair turned his attention to the “sham” of a relationship that Edge has with Vickie. He accused Edge of using Vickie to advance his career. That upset Vickie. She made a 3-on-1 steel cage handicap match with Edge and his cronies against Flair. Edge taunted Flair so Naitch slapped him. The camera caught Teddy standing in the corner with a smile on his face. Pretty good segment, though Flair was only okay on the microphone.

[Commercial Break]

-Tonight, Batista challenges MVP for the U.S Title.

1- JOHN MORRISON & THE MIZ & CHAVO GUERRERO vs. JESSE & FESTUS & CM PUNK

That’s an odd pairing on the face side. Festus chased the heels out of the ring as soon as the bell rang. Miz dropped Punk’s throat over the top rope and tagged Chavo in. Chavo got tagged himself, by Punk. Jesse rolled through a hip-toss and landed an arm-drag. Morrison tried to come in to help his team, but Festus stopped that. With a break in the action, the show took a break.

[Commercial Break]

Chavo was in control out of break, working over Jesse after Miz pushed him off the top rope before the break. Jesse fought off Miz and tagged Festus. He used his unorthodox offense on Miz. A big boot got two when Chavo and Morrison broke up the pin. Punk took out Chavo and Jesse flew through the ropes and onto Morrison. In the ring, Festus hit his finisher on Miz for the pin.

WINNERS: Punk & Jesse & Festus at 8:27. Fine six-man, just another way to Festus & Jesse to beat the champs without actually having to win the titles.

-Backstage, Michelle McCool told Jamie Noble he didn’t have anything to prove to her. Jamie told her not to worry, that he knows how she really feels about him. Michelle seemed relieved, but Jamie kept talking as if Michelle was really into him. Jamie said he’s not a one-woman man and has to let Michelle off the hook and re-cast into the sea. Jamie acted awkward as he tried to say goodbye, and Michelle looked relieved as he left. Seems like Jamie went to a lot of trouble to get a woman who he didn’t even stay with for any amount of time.

-It’s a 3-on-1 handicap match with Edge and his squad against Undertaker. But next, Batista faces MVP with the U.S Title on the line.

[Commercial Break]

2- MVP vs. BATISTA- U.S TITLE MATCH

After a clean break on a lock-up, Batista rolled out of a side head-lock and MVP was not happy. Kick to the gut by Batista, but MVP was able to roll out of the way of another Batista kick. MVP ran again but Batista went to the outside to bring him back in. A drop-toe hold led to some work on the right knee by The Animal. MVP went to the outside, holding his knee as the show went to break.

[Commercial Break]

Batista continued work on the right leg of MVP. It seems like every long match (or every MVP match) on Smackdown follows the same story of working on a body part for ten minutes. The psychology is good but it gets a little tiring seeing the same thing every week. MVP kicked out Batista’s leg from under him, then nailed Batista with a kick to the head. Chin-lock applied by Montel Vontavious Porter. Coach reminded us that MVP doesn’t have to win tonight, Batista does. Thanks Coach. Face-buster by MVP after a thrust to the throat. He took a while covering Batista, which cost him, as he only got a two-count. Another kick to the head by MVP. Just for irony’s sake, MVP began working on BATISTA’S leg. Batista missed a corner charge and went shoulder-first into the post. He went for a third running boot, but this one didn’t connect. Side slam by the big man. That got a near-fall. MVP countered a spinebuster and took Batista down for two. Playmaker attempt got turned into a spinebuster by Big Dave. MVP tried a low blow to no avail. He kicked MVP to the outside and the two began two brawl into the crowd. MVP got in the ring and kicked at Batista to keep him outside. As Batista tried to roll in the ring, referee Jimmy Korderas’s count reached ten.

WINNER: MVP to retain, at 15:11. Not a bad match....quality-wise, somewhere in between their first one from a few weeks back and their last one. Closer to the first one though.

-The Hornswoggle-Vince-JBL conundrum was reviewed, with clips from two weeks ago and last week.

[Commercial Break]

-Jamie Noble came into Vickie Guerrero’s office and demanded a match with Chuck Palumbo tonight. Vickie asked about the size difference and Noble ranted about not caring if they’re bigger than him, even if they’re ten feet taller. Vickie said Chuck has a match tonight but he can face the Big Show. This led to a flashback of their previous relationship, with Jamie leaving the scene muttering to himself about Vickie putting him in a match with someone so much bigger than him. Funny callback.

-Michael Cole and Coach reviewed the previous Hall-of-Fame inductees, then intro’d the Mae Young video.

[Commercial Break]

-Michael Cole announced that Kim Kardashian would be a special guest-hostess (whatever that means) at WrestleMania.

-Coach was in the ring to MC a diva contest. Eve Torres came out first. She was followed by Cherry, sans roller-skates. Maryse, Victoria and Michelle McCool. Looks like they’ve got the C-list divas out there tonight. Michelle wore a LeBron James jersey, which should immediately disqualify her- sucking up to the crowd when they’re deciding who wins is just not fair. According to Coach, one diva will be eliminated each week and the winner will not only get bragging rights, but a custom made motorcycle. A brief video showed the guy they’re getting the cycle from. Fans at home can play as well, texting their favorite divas name. Eve did some dancing, then took off her robe. Cherry followed, and she was a bit hesitant at first. Maryse went next, then Victoria, who had trouble getting her top off, then fell off the middle rope as she was posing. Michelle finished things off. Tough decision here. Coach said if it was up to him, they’d all be winners. The first elimination will be made next week. Maryse began pushing Eve around until Michelle slapped her. Maryse pulled Eve out of the ring and continued bullying her as Michelle and Victoria went toe-to-toe in the ring. Michelle ended up kicking her out. As if we already didn’t know they wanted us to vote for Michelle....

[Commercial Break]

3- KANE vs. CHUCK PALUMBO

Seated dropkick by Kane. Big running clothesline by Chuck, followed by some hard right hands. Cole called this a “statement-making match for Palumbo.” Short clothesline got two by Chuck. Kane began his comeback with right hands of his own and a few corner clotheslines. Kane went to the top, but Palumbo brought him down. Kane didn’t stay down for long as he shook off some headbutts and chokeslammed Palumbo to end things.

WINNER: Kane at 3:16.

-Big Show was walking backstage...his match with Jamie Noble is next.

[Commercial Break]

-Freddie Roach (Oscar De La Hoya’s former trainer), Michael Buffer and Thomas “Hitman” Hearns gave their thoughts on the Show vs. Mayweather match in a video package.

4- JAMIE NOBLE vs. BIG SHOW

Noble punched away at Show’s mid-section but Show just shoved him face-first into the mat. As Noble was seated in the corner, he kicked Show right in the groin to draw a DQ.

WINNER: Show at :44.

Predictably, Show continued beating on Noble and Noble began coughing up blood from some hard shots to the ribs. Referee Charles Robinson finally got Big Show to back off. Show got a mic and said while people may not like him, there’s a lot of people, including those in the locker room, who don’t like Floyd. Show once again asked Floyd if $20 million was worth his career.

-Next, Edge and his EdgeHeads face Undertaker in a 3-on-1 handicap match.

[Commercial Break]

-It was announced that next week, Batista would get a re-match against MVP for the U.S. Title in a No Holds Barred Match. Cole also noted that in Ric Flair’s 3-on-1 match next week, his career is NOT on the line.

5- EDGE & CURT HAWKINS & ZACK RYDER vs. UNDERTAKER- HANDICAP MATCH

Hawkins tried to run from Taker to start, but the Dead Man was having none of that. Ryder was next and he was cornered by Undertaker as well. A simple glare chased the remaining two challengers off the apron and onto the floor. Taker tried to force Ryder to tag Edge, but Edge jumped off the apron again. Taker went for a running boot on Ryder in the corner, but Edge pulled his teammate out of harm’s way. After some offense by Ryder, he tagged in Hawkins. They tagged on and off until Edge reached out and expressed his desire to finally enter the match. He waited too long though as Taker’s arm shot up and grabbed Edge’s throat. A DDT planted Edge. Corner clothesline by Undertaker, who then went Old School. Snake Eyes for one of the EdgeHeads, then a big boot. Edge tagged in but was put down and Taker was going for his choke submission. At that point, Edge’s buddies interfered to break it up. They got double-chokeslammed for their troubles. While that was going on, Edge was setting up for the spear, which he hit and pinned his WrestleMania opponent.

WINNERS: Edge & Hawkins & Ryder at 5:30. Interesting finish. I sure didn’t expect it.

Taker pointed to the WM sign then did the throat-slash gesture as Edge raised the title over his head to end the show.

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