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KELLER'S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT
MAY 23, 2008
TAPED IN DES MOINES, IOWA - AIRED ON THE CW

WHAT HAPPENED: 1ST HOUR

-The Smackdown opening actually opened the show. Then pryo blasted as Michael Cole introduced the show. He said Vickie Guerrero's decision at Judgment Day to keep the World TItle vacant is one of the most controversial in recent memory.

-Justin Roberts introduced Vickie Guerrero. Edge rolled her onto the stage in her wheelchair. The crowd booed. She milked the moment just as she did on Sunday. She said none of the fans know what it's like to run a huge television show like this. The boos were really loud. She said, "I am talking!" She repeated herself. She said despite the pressures she faces, she still fulfills all of her duties as General Manager. She said one of her duties is to enforce the rules and regulations. She said a championship can only be won by pinfall or submission. She said Sunday at Judgment Day, referee Charles Robinson made the mistake of counting Edge out of the ring and awarded Undertaker the World Hvt. Title. "Thank god I was there to correct that mistake," she said indignantly.

She said at One Night Stand, there will be no mistakes to be made. She said she has a huge announcement to make and she wanted to be clear that she is making the announcement without worrying about any repercussions from the Undertaker. She said every match at One Night Stand is being fought under extreme rules. She asked Edge to help her stand. She tried to stand, but couldn't. Her facial expressions were great. She declared that she will present the most extreme world championship match ever to be made in history - Tables, Ladders, Chairs - Edge vs. Undertaker. She said if Undertaker loses, it'll be the last time the fans see him because he will be banished from the entire WWE. Edge grinned widely and wheeled her away.

-Cole plugged that Teddy Long would be MVP's guest on the VIP Lounge later. They went to a break. That was pretty cold. There wasn't much to be excited about headed into the break. I like Teddy Long and all, but that's not a top shelf enticement to stay tuned.

[Commercial Break]

1 -- JESSE & FESTUS & CHERRY vs. DEUCE & DOMINIO & MARYSE

Foley said Steinbeck could write a book about Jesse and Festus. Foley said looking at Maryse, you can't blame D&D for moving on from Cherry. Foley noted that D&D had a losing streak with Cherry with them, so he understands them trying something new. The bell rang and Festus went wild. Foley said he was hard on Cherry last week, so he wrote some poetry for her. Foley said Vickie has a tendency to make the best matches for the worst reasons. Foley took credit and blame for investing the TLC format. At 4:00 Cherry tagged in and Foley quickly read some poetry he wrote for her. Cherry gave Maryse a very awkward bulldog. Jesse tumbled over the top rope with Dominio on a charging clothesline. Deuce yanked Cherry off of Maryse. Festus kicked Deuce who bumped inot Cherry. Maryse then kicked and pinned Cherry. They replayed the stiff roundkick to the face by Maryse several times.

WINNERS: Deuce & Domino & Cherry in 5:00.

STAR RATING: *1/4

-Chavo Guerrero approached Edge and Vickie backstage. He said he wanted to work out the misunderstanding last week. Vickie said there are no hard feelings, but she did book him against Undertaker one-on-one later. Her delivery is just great here. Chavo protested. Edge said to Vickie maybe Chavo's scared. Chavo insisted the whole Familia should be there for him. Vickie said they can do it together.

[Commercial Break]

-MVP interviewed Teddy Long on his VIP Lounge segment. Cole and Foley talked about how in the latest WWE Magazine, MVP talks about the best interviewers on WWE ever, including Piper's Pit, The Cutting Edge, and the Brothers Love Show. They teased that the show he picked as the best ever was a shock. MVP told the fans that the VIP Lounge is "for people better than you." He introduced Long. Cole and Foley updated viewers on William Regal being fired on Raw earlier in the week. Long thanked MVP for having him on his show. MVP said he was going to let Teddy tell his side of the story, but first he has a lot he wants to say to him. He said he hasn't forgotten all that he put him through when he started on Smackdown. He told him he's not his boss anymore, so he can tell him everything he wanted to tell him before without repercussion. Long disagreed. MVP said he's jealous of his suits and hair. Long said he didn't have to stand there and listen to him. MVP said he'd listen until he was dismissed. Batista's music then played and walked to the ring.

He entered the ring. MVP told Batista not to play hero and protect the weak. Batista interrupted and said it's not what he thinks. Batista said he just wanted to have a chance to say goodbye. He said he's been a good G.M. and he wished him luck in whatever he does. He turned to MVP and said if he laid a hand on him again, he'd shove his fist down his throat. MVP told him he has to be preparing for his stretcher match. He said he didn't appreciate him disrespecting him. Batista said he wasn't being disrespectful. Batista said disrespectful would be kicking his set, which he then did, knocking his table and chair over. MVP ducked out of the ring as Batista continued to beat up the set, then saying after each punch or kick, "That's definitely disrespectful." MVP strode to the back. Batista smiled and left the ring.

[Commercial Break]

-Edge chatted with Chavo. MVP barged in and asked Vickie if she saw what just happened. Edge didn't like him barging in like that. MVP complained that Batista destroyed his set and asked her to do something about it. Vickie offered a match with Batista for him. MVP said that's not what he wanted. She told him to get his stuff and get ready because his match would be tonight. Edge said, "Problem solved!"

2 -- FINLAY (w/Hornswoggle) vs. CHUCK PALUMBO

Foley compared the ring entrance of Palumbo on his motor cycle to John Laurenaitis's "dynamic" ring intro when he brought a surf board to the ring. (Laurenaitis, as Johnny Ace, was a member of the Dynamic Dudes in WCW in the early-'90s. Foley said Palumbo feels he just needs one big win to get back into the middle of the championship chase. At 2:00 Hornswoggle sprayed Palumbo from ringside with a squirt gun. When Palumbo went after Hornswoggle at ringside, Finlay surprised him with a clothesline. Hornswoggle then jumped onto Palumbo's stomach Kevin Sullivan style, then retreated under the ring. Palumbo came back with a kick to the face of Finlay. Back in the ring he hit a back suplex for a two count, then pounded on Finlay in a full mount. Finlay slipped out and applied an armbar. Palumbo reached the ropes, then kicked Finlay and settled into a chinlock - the second one of the match. Palumbo hit a hard clothesline and a big boot for a near fall. Finlay made a comeback at 8:00 and scored a two count. He dove off the second rope with a cross bodyblock for a two count. Foley said Finlay is not a frequent flyer. Palumbo fired back with another hard clothesline for a near fall. Hornswoggle distracted Palumbo again. Palumbo threw Hornswoggle into the ring. Hornswoggle sprayed the Iris green mist in Palumbo's face. Finley then hit Palumbo with the shillelagh and scored the three count. The ref was distracted by Hornswoggle during the shillelagh shot.

WINNER: Finlay in 10:00.

STAR RATING: *3/4 -- Solid TV match. It had its moments. The Hornswoggle stuff seems to please some of the younger fans, but it's tough to take the match outcome seriously when it's such an integral part of the finish.

-They showed MVP warming up backstage.

[Commercial Break]

-A clip aired of Batista beating Chris Jericho on Raw on Monday.

WHAT HAPPENED: 2ND HOUR

3 -- MVP vs. BATISTA

The match built slowly with MVP stalling. Batista actually leapfrogged MVP. Foley said he didn't remember the last time Batista did that. I don't ever remember it. MVP came back with a shot at Batista's knee, then gave him a big boot to knock him to the floor at 3:00.

[Commercial Break]

MVP dominated after the break. He leaped to the floor and yanked Batista's arm over the top rope. Cole asked if someone when a wrestler loses their first title, they become a better wrestler. Foley said that is definitely the case with MVP. When MVP finally set up a big boot, Batista speared him at 11:00. They went to ringside where Batista threw MVP into the ringpost. Back in the ring, Batista threw MVP shoulder-first into the ringpost. Batista one-arm spinebustered MVP to the mat, shook the ropes with one arm, and then executed a Batista Bomb for the win.

WINNER: Batista in 13:00.

STAR RATING: **1/4

[Commercial Break]

-A recap aired of Raw's Santino Marella-Roddy Piper skits.

4 -- VLADIMIR KOZLOV vs. NUNZIO

Foley expressed his admiration for Kozlov when Cole called him on making fun of the "robotic, stone-like Kozlov." Kozlov used his head a battering-ram to stop a charging Nunzio. When Kozlov lifted Nunzio, Foley said, "I hope Nunzio filled out the organ donor card!" Kozlov finished Nunzio decisively and easily. Kozlov made scary faces afterward.

WINNER: Kozlov in 2:00.

[Commercial Break]

5 -- KOFI KINGSTON & MATT HARDY vs. ELIJAH BURKE & SHELTON BENJAMIN

Cole said it'll be interesting to see how Kofi responds to his first-ever loss in "pro wrestling entertainment." After Foley rambled about his oldest son stealing batteries from his younger one's toy or something, Cole said he lost him a while back and asked why in his novels he doesn't ramble like that. Foley said, "So you're the one who read my novel?" Kofi showed off his excellent athletic ability, at which point Foley compared him to a young Rick Steamboat. Kofi surprised Shelton with his spinning roundhouse kick for the win.

WINNERS: Kofi & Hardy in 6:00.

STAR RATING: *1/4 -- Solid action from start to finish. Kofi's athleticism and grace really does stand out.

[Commercial Break]

-A Raw recap aired of Regal being fired after losing to Mr. Kennedy. They showed him walking out of the arena with his packed suitcase.

-Cole and Foley hyped the entire One Night Stand line-up.

-They showed Chavo heading toward the entrance tunnel with La Familia behind him.

6 -- UNDERTAKER vs. CHAVO GUERRERO (w/Edge, Zach Ryder, Curt Hawkins)

Cole talked about the heavy stip for Taker's match against Edge at ONS, which is if he loses, he is done with WWE. Chavo went after Taker at the start, but Taker lifted him and threw him into the corner where he pounded on him. Cole said, "Can you imagine if Undertaker delivers Old School from the top of the 15 foot ladder." Taker missed a big boot and straddled the top rope. Edge, Zach, and Curt triple-teamed Taker. The ref ordered them to the back. Chavo slidekicked Taker, then threw him back into the ring at 4:00. Taker fought back, but Chavo dropkicked Taker's knee. At ringside Taker rammed Chavo into the ringpost spine-first. Back in the ring, though, Chavo reversed course with by DDTing Taker into the ring. Taker sat up and Chavo looked shocked. Taker shoved Chavo into the ropes, then punched and headbutted him. Taker gave Chavo a Snake Eyes and a running big boot for a two count. He set up a chokeslam, but Chavo raked his eyes. Bam Neely jumped onto the ring apron to distract the ref. Taker punched him off the ring apron. Chavo kicked Taker low. It almost seemed as if Neely got on the ring apron a little too early. It worked out fine, though. Chavo dove off the top rope onto Taker, but he caught Chavo, gave him a Tombstone, and scored the pin. Cole said if Taker can pull that off at ONS, he can climb the ladder and win the goal. Foley said Taker could casually climb the ladder if he executes that move on Edge first.

WINNER: Undertaker in 8:00.

STAR RATING: *1/2 -- Basic stuff, but never boring.

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