WWE Raw Live Report
August 25, 2008
Wilkes-Barre, Pa.
The special edition of Raw on Sci-Fi opened with World Hvt. champion C.M. Punk to a strong reaction. Not quite Chicago last week, but another solid reaction. Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler quickly started to promote the Championship Scramble match for Unforgiven, with Cole nearly-guaranteeing a new champion. It's obvious early on they're trying to sell the PPV in two weeks based on the strong possibility of seeing a title change. JBL then came to the ring and we're still not sure what is going on. Apparently they're doing Punk vs. JBL again. One thing that drives me utterly mad about how Cole is produced as play-by-play man is that we have zero idea of whether a title is on the line, who's wrestling, what's at stake, etc. No basics.
1 -- World Hvt. champion C.M. PUNK vs. JBL -- non-title match
Bell sounded and the fans chanted for Punk to start things off. Lawler said his sources tell him John Cena has some sort of injury that they hope to get more info on tonight. Two minutes into this, Cole confirmed it's a non-title match. Nice opening four minutes with Punk nailing a suicide dive on the floor, then JBL getting back at him with a boot to the face that cleared Punk to the floor. Cut to break.
[Commercial Break]
JBL was on the attack coming out of the break, even foaming at the mouth for added heel intensity value. JBL put Punk in a fireman's carry torture rack to work over the ribs before slamming him to the mat for a nearfall. JBL lit into Punk with repeated right hands, but Punk came back with a surprise tornado DDT from the top turnbuckle for a nearfall.
[Q2]
Punk made his full comeback with a high knee and bulldog combo, but it was only good for a nearfall. Punk then measured JBL for the finish, but JBL slipped out of the GTS and fired up a huge Clothesline from Hell. Cole said it should be over, but JBL took too long to make the cover, allowing Punk to grab the bottom rope to block the three count. JBL, desperate, then went to the floor and retrieved a steel chair. The ref quickly yanked the chair away, though, and JBL walked into the Go 2 Sleep. Punk made the cover and scored the pin for the clean win. Post-match, they stayed with Punk's celebration for a while to allow plenty of time for the announcers to talk up Punk.
WINNER: Punk in 13:00. Nice match. Good opener to set a good tone for intense action tonight. Punk continues to find a way to win, which fits his gimmick as the inspirational babyface who wins against-all-odds. (**1/2)
Tonight: Kofi vs. IC champ Santino for the belt and Kane vs. Batista.
[Commercial Break]
On-stage: Raw GM Mike Adamle showed up to direct our attention to the Titantron to watch a recap video on the Cena vs. Batista match at Summerslam. They focused on Cena grimacing, apparently injured from the Batistabombs. Adamle said Cena suffered a herniated disc and Cena tried to fight through the injury, but an MRI revealed the damage is much worse than originally thought. He said Cena will require surgery and will be out indefinitely. So, that means he's out of the Championship Scramble and he will name a replacement before the night is over. Ringside, Adamle and Lawler discussed the opportunity at the World Title
Backstage: Kane grabbed a camera and shook it around to cut a promo about pain being a good thing. He said what Batista did to Cena is nothing compared to what he did to Rey Mysterio. Kane said taking a soul helps him relish the pain he's inflicted on victims. He said that leaves the victim questioning whether they are alive or dead.
[Q3]
Adamle's office: Adamle was suddenly back in his office and walked up to Primo Colon to apologize for interrupting his intro last week. Adamle said he has the apples and cabana ready for tonight, but Colon cut him off and said he is nothing like Carlito. He said Carlito is a jerk to everyone, including his own family, so he just wants to be his own man. Suddenly, Shawn Michaels appeared out of nowhere. He wanted to know where Jericho is. Adamle said he has not arrived yet tonight, and gave Michaels all the time he needs tonight. Adamle then asked how Rebecca is doing. Michaels simply stopped walking and shot him a glance before walking off camera.
[Commercial Break]
In-ring: Kelly Kelly came to the ring to challenge Beth Phoenix to a match. Beth then walked out in a stunning outfit, with Santino following closely behind.
2 -- Women's champion BETH PHOENIX (w/Santino Marella) vs. KELLY KELLY -- non-title match
Early on, Beth came up bleeding heavily from the nose after taking an apparent boot to the face. Beth and Santino had a discussion after Santino tried to help, which distracted Beth enough for Kelly to roll her up from behind for the win. Afterward, Santino covered his face and quietly entered the ring to check on Beth, who wiped away blood from her nose before tackling Santino and landing repeated punches. Santino then ran out of the ring to head for higher ground.
WINNER: Kelly in 3:00. Fine to promote the "unique" relationship between Santino and Beth, who was pretty popular for blasting Santino post-match. (1/2*)
[Commercial Break]
WWE 24:7 clip: April 23, 1989 with Mr. Perfect vs. Bret Hart in one of their classic singles matches. ... Ringside: Cole said he forgot that was the match that started it all. That was the equivalent of fake hustle in basketball. Lawler then plugged everything that's available on 24/7.
In-ring: Carlito's music hit, then Charlie Haas came out sporting an afro wig and calling himself Charlito. They showed an inset promo of Haas saying he spits in the face of people who look like mules. Unbelievably lame. Primo Colon then came out as the opposition for fake Carlito.
[Q4]
3 -- PRIMO COLON vs. CHARLIE HAAS
Haas tried to spit an apple in Primo's face, but Primo came back with a dropkick and monkey flip out of the corner. Haas lost his wig, then went for the backstabber, but Primo held onto the top rope to block. He then sprung up top and nailed a leaping splash for the pin and the win.
WINNER: Primo in 3:00. Fine debut for Primo, but we could have used a few weeks of promotional vignettes to introduce us to his character. He has the smile-and-pump-your-fists babyface mannerisms that are notoriously associated with The Rock when he first debuted in WWE. Evan Bourne has made it work on ECW and it remains to be seen of Primo makes it work on Raw. (1/2*)
Backstage: They showed a stoic Shawn Michaels walking.
[Commercial Break]
Video package: They recapped Chris Jericho's heel speech on last week's Raw where he accused Shawn Michaels of selfishly walking away and putting his wife in harm's way.
In-ring: Shawn Michaels slowly walked to the ring and dropped off his cowboy hat ringside before staring down at the ring mat. The camera zoomed in tight on Michaels, who let the crowd get their cheers in before quietly addressing the health of his wife first. He said she's hurt, but after being married to him for 10 years, she's tough and she'll be O.K. Michaels said he went home last week to take care of his family while trying to look at this rationally. He said he wants to believe Jericho didn't mean to hit his wife, but then they sat down to watch Raw and he watched as Jericho blamed him and the fans without showing any remorse for what he had done.
Michaels said he didn't send in a letter of resignation because he has earned the right to come into the ring and thank the fans who have supported him over the last 20 years. He paused for the cheers, then said he didn't realize that saying good-bye for the last time would be so difficult, which is why he had his wife with him to support him. And her reward was a punch in the face. Michaels said Jericho blamed Rebecca for practically everything, then he turned to her and looked into her eyes and knew...knew that he wasn't going anywhere. Big cheers.
Suddenly, a chorus of boos filled the arena as Jericho appeared on the Titantron facing Michaels. Jericho, with his chest puffed out of his suit like a classic superhero villain, quietly told Michaels he's a very lucky man because he's at WWE Studios and not in the arena to do damage to Michaels. Jericho said the last time they faced each other, he tore Michaels apart. He said if they were to face-off again, Michaels wouldn't be able to leave the ring. Jericho said Michaels is calculating, conniving, and selfish, and he won't accept the match because he knows Michaels will try to sue him for the damage he does.
[Q5 -- second hour]
Michaels screamed that he'll sign any waiver, form, or hold harmless (I'm back at work handling real estate documents, apparently) to make sure he gets Jericho in the ring. Michaels said what he would do to Jericho outside of the ring would get him tossed in jail, but inside the ring - Michaels slowly touched the mat while leaning down - he can do whatever he wants. Awesome. Michaels said Jericho needs to be afraid of what he will do to him.
Jericho sneered and told Michaels to look in the mirror and see what he's already done to him. He told Michaels to look at his wife's face and see what he's capable of. Michaels cut off Jericho and screamed at him to accept the match or show what he already knows - that Michaels's wife is tougher than him. Jericho quietly said O.K. and accepted the match for Unforgiven. Michaels cut off Jericho and said Jericho doesn't even know the meaning of the word unforgiven. He said he'll never forgive Jericho for what he did to his family. He said it's not about a one, two, three, or stealing the show. "Eye for an eye," Michaels said, officially confirming he's going Old Testament on Jericho at the PPV. It doesn't get any better than Michaels-Jericho.
[Commercial Break]
ECW tomorrow night: They determine four challengers to the ECW Title for the Unforgiven PPV championship scramble.
In-ring: DiBiase and Rhodes came to the ring without their tag title belts, which were stolen by Cryme Tyme last week. Jerry Lawler and Jim Duggan then showed up to challenge the champs. They missed the boat on this feud about a month ago when Duggan had the great promo, but they lacked follow-up.
4 -- World tag team champions TED DIBIASE, JR. & CODY RHODES vs. JERRY LAWLER & JIM DUGGAN -- non-title match
Cole by himself on the air, which should be interesting. Duggan sounded like a parody of himself begging for a hot tag from Lawler throughout this one. Lawler eventually accepted three playful slaps from Cody before dropping the strap and punching Cody across the ring. Duggan then took the hot tag and cleaned house until DiBiase caught him from behind. He slapped on the Million Dollar Dream and transitioned into a Russian legsweep for the pin and the win on Duggan.
WINNERS: DiBiase & Rhodes in 3:00. Fine, but there was no reason to care about Duggan two months after he disappeared from a storyline with potential. Also of note, DiBiase & Rhodes should not be in jeopardy against a tandem over 100 years old. (*)
[Q6]
Post-match: Cody took the mic and said Cryme Tyme stole their belts, which is not how you win titles in WWE. He said Cryme Tyme can't beat them. Cryme Tyme's music hit, then they were shown up in the skybox hanging with some friends from the adult 35-49 demographic while sporting the tag title belts. Shad not-so-meticulously worked his way through a promo about DiBiase and Rhodes needing to put the belts on the line at Unforgiven. DiBiase told them they needed to go through the proper channels and they don't even know what they got themselves into. He then accepted the title proposition and said they'll find out why he's priceless. Shad and JTG then rapped about that money money, yeah, yeah. This was quite the rough promo exchange. Very rough.
[Commercial Break]
Backstage: Todd Grisham brought in Batista for an interview. Batista did not look happy. Grisham asked about the match against Kane tonight, but Batista had to comment on Cena first. He said the match against Cena was one of the toughest of his career and he's never seen Cena back down before, which is why he has nothing but respect for Cena especially facing surgery. Batista addressed Kane and said he's not intimidated by that sick freak. He said it's personal tonight. Batista then stared off to close the promo.
In-ring: Santino came out by himself for his IC Title defense while looking around for Beth Phoenix. Santino looked very nervous without his security blanket. Kofi Kingston then came out to challenge for the title.
5 -- IC champion SANTINO MARELLA vs. KOFI KINGSTON -- Intercontinental Title match
Gotta love Santino. He slapped on an abdominal stretch and instantly told the ref to call for the bell for a submission. Kofi easily escaped, then teased a top rope dive before nailing a Russian legsweep. Kofi then landed the boom-boom leg drop smash and Santino rolled to the floor. He wanted a time-out, but Beth Phoenix stormed ringside and told Santino to get back in the ring. Kofi checked on Beth, then slipped back into the ring where Beth tripped him from behind and Kofi ate Santino's knee. Kofi slumped to the mat, then Santino rolled him over and made the cover for the win.
Afterward, Santino backed into a corner when Beth slipped into the ring with a band-age over her nose. Santino was frightened, but Beth pinned his arms back and planted a big kiss. Santino asked, "You not mad?" He then celebrated the victory and Beth not being mad at him by spinning her into the turnbuckle and planting a big kiss on her. Beth then led Santino out of the ring and told him to walk straight, while Santino just wanted to gloat to the fans about winning. Classic.
WINNER: Santino in 3:00 to retain the IC Title. Poor Kofi is stuck in a storyline where Glamarella and Santino's unibrow are more important than Kofi. Santino and Beth are awesome, but Kofi deserves better. Match was just O.K. (3/4*)
[Q7]
[Commercial Break]
Democratic Nat'l Convention: They showed a video package hosted by Josh Matthews and Candice Michelle from the Democratic National Convention in Denver. Candice encouraged people to get out and vote. She told the viewers to check out WWE's website to compare McCain and Obama on the issues. Matthews said they'll be in St. Paul for next week's Republican convention.
On-stage: Mike Adamle walked out to announce the replacement to John Cena in the Raw championship scramble. Adamle said this man is a former World Hvt. champion, then he announced Rey Mysterio as the fifth participant in the Scramble match. I thought he was dead? Lawler said that judging from Kane's words lately, he thought Rey was done.
Backstage: They showed Batista walking in anticipation of the match against Kane.
[Commercial Break]
In-ring: Batista came to the ring and Lawler plugged Batista appearing on the cover of Muscle & Fitness. He threw in a Vince McMahon reference for when Vince was on the cover of the magazine. Kane then came to the ring as the opposition as the announcers speculated as to what sick and heinous things Kane did to Rey Mysterio weeks ago.
[Q8]
6 -- KANE vs. BATISTA
A big power struggle ensued to start things off while the announcers commenting on Cena's injury being part of the game in WWE. Lawler with the line that it's not ballet. That's a pretty ignorant line oft-repeated in wrestling, as ballet requires the same physical commitment and pressure on the joints and body with an amazing amount of time devoted to it. Yes, I have had conversation with a former ballet dancer who had to retire at the age of 20 due to her injuries. In any event, they cut to commercial with Batista on the defensive and Kane enjoying his attack on Batista.
[Commercial Break]
They came back with Kane teasing a chokeslam before focusing his attack on the injured knee. Kane smiled and took great pleasure in going after the knee. At 10:00, Kane took Batista to the outside and slammed his knee into the ring steps to continue the attack. Batista then started his traditional comeback of working on one good body part. He then took Kane face-first into the bottom turnbuckle with a drop toe hold before landing a hard clothesline in the corner. He went for a second, but Kane blocked and wanted a chokeslam.
[Q9 -- over-run]
Batista blocked a chokeslam and nailed a spinebuster on one good leg. Classic Smackdown episodes here, as Batista set up for the Batistabomb, but Kane took out the knee in a nice move. Kane then rolled Batista to the outside and wrapped his leg around the ringpost. Kane then picked up a chair and smashed 99 percent of the ringpost to cause a DQ. Kane then went after the knee some more with more direct blows using the chair. Batista hobbled across the ring, then hobbled into a spear when Kane followed back into the ring. Batista then picked up the chair and landed repeated chair shots to Kane's back before taking Kane's knee across the ringpost for a dose of his own medicine. Batista landed a chair shot to the knee, then another, and another, and another, and another. Batista collapsed to the floor in pain while Kane hobbled away from the ringpost back in the ring. Cole said these two men have beaten the heck out of each other tonight, and what does that mean for their chances in the championship scramble? End show.
WINNER: Batista via DQ in 14:00. About what was expected - a slow-moving, big-man's battle heavy on body-part-work and Kane losing his mind. A unique way to close the show with both men totally spent and neither one having the upper hand after all the energy exerted. Good hook for next week's final sales pitch. (**)
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