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By Jon Mezzera, Torch Specialist

IMPACT HITS

Karen and AJ: As ridiculous as the Karen Angle and AJ Styles “marriage” idea is, it did provide some fun moments. I was happy TNA didn’t try to pass it off as a real marriage. Karen was able to trick Styles into thinking that it was, but he has been less than intelligent, so that makes sense. I particularly enjoyed the scene in the restaurant. Styles was great going from buffoon trying to be romantic, to being romantic with the snow globe story, to being a buffoon again ordering grub at the end of the scene. He did a good job, as did Karen. Jeremy Borash’s off screen comments were good too, especially during the scene in the alligator park. While I am tired of the on again, off again marital problems of the Angles, this week was pretty fun.

Brother Ray: Let me start out by saying that it was unbelievable that Brother Devon made weight last week. It is even more unbelievable that Brother Ray made weight this week. However, Ray entertained me after the weigh in. I laughed out loud when he called Devon a fat bastard. I probably shouldn’t, but I did. His attempt to apologize was amusing too. I really liked how he held onto the mic during the opening minute of the match. I would have enjoyed seeing him continue to talk into the mic longer. His horrible dance was very funny. This angle would be better if a more believable weight had been chosen.

Christian Cage’s Promo: Christian Cage cut a good promo about his six man tag match with Samoa Joe & Kevin Nash vs. The Angle Alliance. He addressed what happened to him last week, that it was Styles who hit him with a chair. He was good in discussing his past with Styles & Tomko and moving on to the future. I like the idea that he and his partners aren’t trying to be friends, or pretend that they like each other. He did a good job of expressing the notion that they are coming together just for one purpose, to destroy the Angle Alliance. It was straight forward and well delivered.

Main Event: Booker T vs. Kurt Angle was a good match. Unfortunately, TNA felt the need to interrupt a 16 minute match with two commercials so we ended up only seeing 9 of those minutes. But, what we saw was good which isn’t surprising as they had some very good matches in WWE. There was no reason why this match happened. It suffered from the fact that there was nothing on the line, and there was no issue between the two wrestlers. Why were they having a match? It suffered from the predictable interference from Robert Roode. I would have liked to have seen the match with only one commercial, but that is a testament to Booker T and Angle. They did a good job putting on a match to entertain the fans. Therefore, I am giving the match a marginal Hit, based on their effort despite some of my problems with it.

IMPACT MISSES

Kip James’ Turn: I can’t imagine caring any less about two long time wrestling stars. The New Age Outlaws were a huge deal in wrestling once upon a time. No longer. The turn was very predictable and nobody really cares. Kip James’ promo after he turned on BG James was headache inducing. It was just another screaming promo. TNA does too many turns. This was just foreshadowing ODB and Gail Kim turning on each other, on the same show that Sanjay Dutt would be given his reason to eventually turn on Jay Lethal. It is just too many turns, and none of them mean anything when done so often.

Lethal Lovefest: I could have done without the tribute to Jay Lethal. He wasn’t on last week, so his victory at the PPV couldn’t have been that important. Jim Cornette mentioned Lethal’s many accomplishments over the last two years, but only listed three things. That was less than impressive. Lethal was fine in his promo, but if he is not going to do the Randy Savage imitation, why is he still called “Black Machismo” and still coming out to the same music? I would love to see him cut a promo officially dropping the Savage gimmick and saying that he is finally going to talk as himself. Instead, we get these half and half moments which are bad.

#1 Contender Situation: Petey Williams won the #1 X-Division ranking in the X-Division gauntlet match in early January. ODB won the Knockout gauntlet and thus earned not only the #1 ranking, but also a title shot against Awesome Kong. So, if ODB got a title shot by being ranked #1 in the Knockout Division, then why didn’t Williams get a title shot by being ranked #1 in the X-Division? So, Williams shouldn’t have had to earn a title shot on Impact. Of course, Scott Steiner should be the #1 contender seeing as how he has the Feast or Fired briefcase. He should also be getting a title shot against Kurt Angle for the same reason. Instead, Angle doesn’t seem to have to defend the title for two months until Lockdown, when he faces Samoa Joe, who hasn’t earned anything. What about Steiner’s shot? What is going on?

I Don’t Have a Pulse: According to Don West, I am dead. He said that if you don’t find Curry Man and Shark Boy entertaining, then you don’t have a pulse. Well guess what? I don’t have a pulse. I would say that Shark Boy should come up with something original for a gimmick instead of just doing an imitation of one of the biggest stars in wrestling history, but I wasn’t thrilled with his old gimmick either. Besides, if he tries to come up with something original, he might come up with something as stupid as Curry Man which would be just as bad.

Pull Apart Brawl: Does every Knockout feud have to start with a pull apart brawl? We saw it multiple times with Gail Kim and Awesome Kong. Then we saw it with Kong and ODB. Now we see it with ODB and Kim. Do something different! I hate to sound sexist (or redundant since I believe I said the same thing about a Kong-Kim brawl), but I find it very hard to believe that multiple security guards wouldn’t be able to hold Kim back. I just want to see a Knockout feud handled in a different way.

End of the Show: After the solid Main Event, Impact had a quick and very bad ending. The multiple run-ins by Robert Roode, Christian Cage, and Samoa Joe, along with the walk-in by Kevin Nash were very anticlimactic. A run-in should get the crowd hyped, but for some reason these did not. Then, the very end of the show was terrible with Nash declaring that he and Angle would be wrestling next week and Don West screaming about the match. Three things. One, how did Nash get the power to make a match? Two, does anyone actually think that match will happen, and if so, does anyone actually want to see it? Three, why is Don West screaming about it? Seriously, it wasn’t that big of a deal, but he screamed like it was the biggest announcement in the history of the Universe.

Jon Mezzera is PWTorch.com's Hits & Misses Specialist, providing his point of view for Raw, Smackdown, ECW, and TNA Impact each week. Email him at jmezz-torch@sbcglobal.net.

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