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The Specialists
3/6 TNA Impact Hits & Misses: Opening Segment, First Blood, Face Eating, Main Event Mar 7, 2008 - 2:37:56 PM
First Blood Match: Impact was a tale of two shows. The first half was bad, the second half, starting with Tomko vs. Samoa Joe was good. This was not great, but good. Tomko and Joe showed good intensity. They did a nice job of focusing on just drawing blood in the opening moments of the match, then moving on to wearing each other down to make that goal more attainable. TNA was gimmick happy this week, but at least this match delivered some quality in ring action. If you had told me that TNA could have a First Blood match that didn’t involve an unprotected chair shot to the head, I would not have believed you. TNA gets some credit for protecting their wrestlers in this match by not having one. I liked the ending with the blood on Joe’s arm. It was a different way to end a First Blood match than I recall seeing before.
James Mitchell: I love listening to Mitchell deliver promos. I am usually not into his feuds, as they tend to be very long and repetitive, but he at least makes his promos interesting. This week he gives a promo following up on a PPV match from a month ago, talking about Abyss walking out of Impact three weeks ago, and hyping a match that I care nothing about involving two wrestlers who aren’t feuding at the moment, yet he still managed to keep my interest. The line of the night, perhaps the best line on Impact so far in 2008, was when he promised to laugh maniacally at the bloodshed that was about to happen. It fit his character perfectly, and Mitchell delivered it so well. With the news that Mecias is leaving TNA, it will be interesting to see what they do with Mitchell. I hope they will find something meaningful without Abyss for him.
Main Event: This was a good Steel Cage match between Christian Cage and Kurt Angle. It went 18 minutes and we saw 14 of those minutes. I was glad that the first commercial break came before the match, which meant that the match itself was only interrupted once. That is better than what TNA usually does for these long Impact Main Events. I also have to say that I prefer the escape only rule for TNA’s Steel Cage matches, as opposed to pinfall, submission or escape in WWE Cage matches. But if elimination is the only way to win, why is there a referee in the ring? The match itself had good back and forth action. Both guys got a chance to get in plenty of offense. There were some nice cage spots, particularly when Angle had Christian in the Ankle Lock on the top rope. The ending was weak with the photo finish. It was anticlimactic that Earl Hebner would just think about it for a few moments and award the match to Christian. That unfortunately knocked the match down a peg. But, it was still a very good Main Event.
IMPACT MISSES
Opening Segment: Impact got off to a bad start. Everything from the opening title to the first commercial was bad. I could list a few Misses, but I am putting them all together. The first scene with the Angle Alliance was silly as the focus was once again on Karen Angle, not on actual wrestling. TNA tried to hype the rest of the show in order to not lose viewers, and while they may have succeeded, they also succeeded in annoying me. Angle ran down the big three matches for the show to AJ Styles and Tomko. Then, the announcers listed all of those matches again. Then in the ring, Jim Cornette mentioned them all again. Then in the back, Crystal listed them again while interviewing the Unlikely Alliance. They kept saying the matches over and over, to the point of being overkill and annoying. They never fully explained the stipulation for the three matches. Angle and Cornette just said that the team that wins two of the three matches tonight gets the advantage at the PPV. Crystal at least said that the winning team would get a three on two advantage to start the match. But it wasn’t until after the commercial break, after the stipulation had been mentioned four times, that the announcers spelled out the stipulation that it would be a three on two handicap match for the first five minutes. It took TNA over 18 minutes to actually define the stipulation for these three big Impact matches. One of the few good thing during the opening segment was Robert Roode’s promo, but that came after the cheesy announcement from Cornette that Roode vs. Booker T will be a Stand By Your Man Strap match. Samoa Joe also cut a good promo, but that was followed by Christian’s bad promo. The usually great Christian just rambled without any focus. It was one of his worst promos. Kevin Nash followed with his Hulk Hogan impersonation. Hyping the top three matches for Impact was good, though over done, but the start of the show made me want to stop watching.
Face Eating: I cringed when the announcers threw it to the back to Crystal and Black Reign, since I don’t want to see this guy on my t.v. I was right to cringe when he threatened to eat Kaz’s face. After Rellik threatened Eric Young a few weeks ago in such an over the top way, TNA should have learned their lesson. And while I gave him a Hit, James Mitchell also went to the face eating well when he ordered Mecias to bite chunks out of Rhino’s face. What is going on in TNA’s booking meetings? We don’t need one face eating remark, let alone two.
Destination X Battle Royale: On a match filled with stipulations, hyping a PPV that is filled with stipulations and gimmicks, we get a Battle Royale to determine another stipulation for a PPV match. I was confused by the presence of LAX, the Motor City Machine Guns and the Rock & Rave Infection, until in was stated that they would be facing each other in a random match at the PPV. The Battle Royale was silly to start, and got sillier as it proceeded. TNA can’t focus on the match for two seconds as Sanjay Dutt came out to collect money, then Scott Steiner came out to interfere. The final three in the match were jokes. They are all involved in meaningless tag matches at the PPV, so who cares about a stipulation? There was a nice spot when Curry Man landed on Jimmy Rave’s back to avoid elimination, but that is the only good thing that happened. Curry Man and Shark Boy don’t have enough history with Team 3D to want them out of TNA. That makes no sense. Why do they get to name that stipulation, and get to make it a gimmick match too? And, why am I wasting this much time thinking about it?
Destination X Card: This Miss isn’t a reflection on this particular Impact, but on TNA’s poor booking decisions for Destination X. I don’t see much reason to order this PPV. The Main Event is a muddled six-man tag match with nothing on the line. That could have been the Impact Main Event setting up three big matches at the PPV, instead of the other way around. TNA has done a good job of building towards Roode vs. Booker, but making it a strap match and involving the women is a mistake. Elevation X is a stupid idea. It didn’t work last year, and it won’t work this year. There will be multiple tag matches that I don’t care about, including the triple threat tag match mentioned above, Kaz & Eric Young vs. Rellik & Black Reign, and Team 3D vs. Shark Boy & Curry Man in a Fish Market Brawl with Team 3D’s careers on the line. MCMGs vs. LAX vs. Rock & Rave could be a good match, but since it was barely announced ahead of time, I doubt it will be given much attention on the PPV. Petey Williams vs. Jay Lethal should be a very good match, but there has been almost no interaction between them going into this match. The hype for it has been second rate, which makes it difficult to get excited about it. The match with the best build is Awesome Kong vs. ODB vs. Gail Kim. I can’t say anything bad about that match or its hype, but that is the only match on the card that I can say that about.
Jon Mezzera is PWTorch.com's Hits & Misses Specialist, providing his point of view for Raw, Smackdown, ECW, and TNA Impact each week. Email him at jmezz-torch@sbcglobal.net.
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