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Welcome once again, Torch readers, to the Logic Check, your one stop shop for all things rational. Smackdown has come and gone so kick back, relax and join me as we take a glimpse at the latest offering from Michael Hayes and Co.
Hey Vicki...why so serious?:
Edge decided that he needed to take his wife Vicki out for a stroll to the ring so that they could clear the air between them. Channeling Heath Ledger, Edge spoke in random outbursts with varying degrees of madness and volume as he proceeded to scare the Guerrero right out of Vicki. The transition of Edge from swarmy heel to crazed madman was complete here as he kneeled on top of Vicki and reminded her of their final wedding vow in a haunting voice before staring off into the distance as the fans chanted for their Dark Knight.
Thoughts: Edge is on a level all his own right now. His performances, week after week, have been masterful pieces of storytelling that have crafted him into the best heel in wrestling today. The way he rubs his face, the way he changes his tone and inflection almost mid-sentence, his incredible sense of timing are all perfect examples of how well Edge has embraced this new facet of his personality. Vicki was good in this as well even though she didn't have to much except shriek and scream. But isn't that all she really does anyway? One minor problem though, no one came out to help Vicki. No babyfaces, no heels who are hoping to kiss up, no security, no police...nothing. Here was this woman being held against her will by a deranged man twice her size and no one thought to do anything. Who says chivalry is dead?
Here I am... stuck in the middle with you...
Vicki Guerrero has been having a bad month. Whether it was having her wedding ruined by infidelity or her Familia being brutally attacked, Vicki just can't seem to catch a break. Then she gets to Smackdown, last night, where her family has apparently abandoned her, she's forced to cling to Victoria (more on that later) then her husband reveals that he is a raving lunatic who promptly kidnaps her and takes her for a ride down to the ring. Never one to leave a wound without salt, Edge then proceeds to air their dirty laundry once again while also taking strides to make Vicki as worthless as possible. I think someone needs a vacation.
Thoughts: When Vicki Guerrero was originally hired and sent to Smackdown, I wasn't entirely convinced that she would ever find a place. How wrong I was, as Vicki has really hit her stride with her heel G.M. character. This goes back to the point I made in my Impact edition regarding the Beautiful People; the best heels are the ones who remind us of those we can't stand. I'm intrigued to see if this whole angle will cause her to remain a babyface since she is more effective as a heel character. That also goes for the rest of La Familia, sans Edge of course.
All that glitters...
Sheldon Benjamin has defended the US title against Jeff Hardy twice in the last two weeks. And each time, MVP, who is facing Hardy at Summerslam, comes down to interfere in the match so he can keep Jeff Hardy from winning the US title.
Thoughts: There is alot about this that doesn't make sense. Why are these US title matches being used to set-up the one on one match this Sunday instead it being the other way around? Why is the champion being left off the PPV in favor of two of his contenders who aren't even wrestling in a # 1 contender match? Why wouldn't MVP want Jeff Hardy to win the US title so that he could then challenge for it at Summerslam? That last question is the one, I feel, sticks out the most. I don't see how it couldn't have occurred to MVP, an calculating mind, that he could have killed two birds with one stone this Sunday if he had just helped Hardy win the gold.
The Life of Brian...
Brian Kendrick has been given a new life on Smackdown. He gets a bodyguard/advisor, promo time, a ridiculously awesome jacket and he even gets to win matches. The character of the undersized heel who is only cocky because of his oversized friends is one that Kendrick can do very well with as it is somewhat reminiscent of his former ROH gimmick. It's still a bit difficult to gauge how strong a character Ezekiel is but that's only because he barely speaks. Some more backgroud on him and his relationship with Kendrick would do wonders in helping them get over.
Thoughts: I've been a fan of Kendricks for a long time now and it's nice to see him finally get a chance to prove himself. He's got a unique wrestling style that sticks out from the rest of the Smackdown roster; hopefully, we can see him in some longer matches that will showcase his abilities. The only problem with Kendrick is his lack of size so it will be interesting to see how WWE chooses to book him in the future.
You do realize this is televised, right?
Last night, Victoria waltzed into Vicki Guerrero's office and proudly joined the ever-growing ranks of professional wrestlers who don't watch professional wrestling. Vicki was acting all nervous so Victoria decides to break the ice with a very compassionate "How's your summer?." Vicki, clearly on edge, starts looking all around while showing real signs of fear that either Edge or the Undertaker would pop out from behind some corner while Victoria sits by, with an incredulous look on her face.
Thoughts: I just don't understand why creative writes it as if wrestlers don't watch their own TV products. Victoria seemed so oblivious and out of place here. First, she has no idea what happened last week on Smackdown. Then, after witnessing the psychotic Edge hop out of limo and grab Vicki's wheelchair, Victoria just runs off and disappears. I'm all for Victoria getting more TV time but I figured she'd be better used, you know, WRESTLING.
Logistical Ruminations:
- JR and Tazz are the best announcing team in the WWE, actually, in all of wrestling.
- Why was Michelle McCool the only diva, involved with the tag team match, who had a last name?
- The Kendrick is a dumb name for a finishing move. I don't see what was wrong with Sliced Bread #2 as it fits in with Brian Kendrick's super-cocky persona.
- What exactly is the payoff for the Festus gimmick? How many different ways can you write material for such a one-dimensional character?
- Colt Cabana debuts!!! I'm a huge fan of Cabana's so it was nice to see him even if he only got to wrestle for three minutes. This guy is comedy gold and the WWE would be absolutely insane if they didn't seek to exploit the funnier side of Scotty Goldman.
- Triple H squashes Kenny Dykstra. Yawn. Didn't we see this last year? Poor Kenny deserves better but at least he's still got his spirit.
- Am I the only one who laughed at the noise Ranjin Singh made when Triple H grabbed him?
- I realize that the Great Khali is a great visual spectacle bu the problem is that is all he should be. His aura of physical superiority is immediately rendered moot whenever he starts moving.
- Was that the Big Show? I'll bet this is exactly why he came back.
- Speaking of Show, considering the size of his fist and the amount of force propelling it, I would think that him punching someone ,straight in the face, would result in a DQ.
- Was Festus vs Vladimir Koslov really our main event?
Conclusion: A very good show from a wrestling standpoint. There were some minute progressions with some of the characters but seeing as Summerslam is on Sunday, it's understandable that they would devote most of their time to selling the PPV. I won't be purchasing it as nothing really screams "must see" for me. Besides, I don't want to have to pay to watch Triple H vs. Great Khali.
Score: 6.0
That's all for this edition of the Logic Check. The first week is in the bag and I've had a blast putting this column together. Thanks to everyone who took the time read it, and a big thanks to those who wrote me an email; it was most appreciated.
Got a comment? A difference of opinion? Drop me a line at adunn.torch@gmail.com.
ABOUT ME:
I reside in Dallas, TX, I've been a wrestling fan for over 20 years and I told you that wasn't Bigfoot. Send feedback on this article to pwtorch@gmail.com and we'll regularly publish reader feedback in the "Torch Feedback" category on the Main Listing.
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