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KELLER'S WWE RAW REPORT
FEBRUARY 17, 2002
LIVE FROM COLUMBUS, OHIOM

WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW

-Eric Bischoff "forced" Shawn Michaels to team with Jeff Hardy against Christian & Chris Jericho because Michaels smarted off about Bischoff having to face Steve Austin at the PPV. Michaels & Hardy won the match.

-Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler talked about the death of Curt Hennig. A video montage aired of Hennig's WWE career.

-Booker T scored a pinfall win over Triple H during the tag match with Scott Steiner and Bastista.

-Eric Bischoff pinned Jim Ross in the TV main event, bloodying Ross in the process by breaking a cinder block over his head (well, sort of).

RUNDOWN OF THE SHOW

-After the opening montage, Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler introduced the show as the camera panned the crowd. Ross was late arriving at the arena due to airport delays on the West Coast, but got there within two hours of showtime. Same for Vince McMahon, who was returning from attending Curt Hennig's funeral in Minnesota.

1 -- ROB VAN DAM (w/Kane) vs. LANCE STORM (w/William Regal).

During Storm's ring entrance, they plugged the RVD & Kane vs. Storm & Regal match at the PPV on Sunday. Ross applauded the fans for making it to the arena through the snowstorm. No pretense this week that Steve Austin was going to show up. Instead, Ross said that Austin's appearance at No Way Out would be electrifying without even hinting that he might be at Raw. Ross and Lawler seemed to have a lot of talking points to get across in the first five minutes of the match because they covered a lot of bases. Storm applied a half Boston crab at 5:30. RVD crawled toward the ropes and eventually reached the bottom rope to break the hold. RVD was going to mount the top rope, but after moving toward one corner, he switched and went to the other. It seemed odd, and Ross even commented that he seemed confused. It became clear why, because RVD had to fend off interference from Regal, who was near the corner he chose. It looked choreographed when it was clear RVD was intentionally going to the corner nearest Regal. Kane offset Regal's attempted interference, and then RVD hit the Five Star for the three count.

WINNER: Rob Van Dam at 7:22.

STAR RATING: *3/4 -- A flat match. Something was missing, although it's hard to put a finger on what. The crowd wasn't all that into it and the match just never seemed to switch gears into something exciting.

-Backstage Shawn Michaels and Jeff Hardy were chatting. Eric Bischoff walked by and Michaels wished him luck against Austin on Sunday. Bischoff said it wasn't funny, and added that he was going to address the entire Raw locker room and Steve Austin. He said when he was done talking, Michaels may be wishing Austin luck.

[commercial break]

-I just caught the tail end of a commercial that saw Carrot Top playing with Stephanie McMahon's feet. Now that is something I never thought I'd see.

-Eric Bischoff walked to the ring and said he had unfinished business with someone, and that someone was in the arena "and I'm going to call him out." The camera focused on a "We Want Austin" sign, but Bischoff instead called out Chief Morley. Morley said WWE Raw is fortunate to have a G.M. like Bischoff. Bischoff said everybody backstage was so happy about him being fired last week and especially happy when it was announced that he was going to have to wrestle Austin. He said he had some revenge now that he was still in charge, and the first match he is announcing is Shawn Michaels & Jeff Hardy vs. Chris Jericho & Christian. Not sure how that's supposed to upset anyone. He then said that he kicked the Dudleys out of the arena. He showed footage from earlier of security forcing them to leave the arena. Bischoff said Bubba and D-Von are suspended, but Spike isn't. He announced that Spike must face Rico & Jamal & Rosie in a three-on-one match. Ross said Bischoff wasn't being fair and was abusing his power. Bischoff said the fans underestimate him; he bragged that is an eighth degree black belt and has been recognized as a martial arts expert for over 20 years. He said he is going to give the fans a demonstration for the first time ever of what he can do by competing in the ring later. He said his opponent would be "Steve Austin's best friend, good ol' J.R." Ross didn't react, but instead just stared ahead blankly. Strange non-reaction from Ross. Lawler said, "I think you can kick his ass."

[commercial break]

-Steven Richards talked Victoria into talking to Jazz before teaming with her. Richards begged her to be civil. Victoria told Jazz she respects her work in the ring, but she doesn't need her help. Jazz said she came to WWE to "take out Trish Stratus" (what, more HLA?) and become the "most dominant woman in WWE." Victoria said she is champion; Jazz responded, "For now."

2 -- JAZZ & VICTORIA (w/Steven Richards) vs. JACKIE & MOLLY HOLLY

Before the match they showed Jackie beating up Steven Richards when he interfered in the Victoria-Jackie match on Heat last night leading to Victoria getting the win. After the live match when Jazz continued beating up Jackie, Ross addressed the crowd's silence by saying the fans were stunned by her. Jazz grabbed the house mic and said, "The bitch is back."

WINNERS: Jazz & when Jazz pinned Jackie at 3:17 after a DDT.

STAR RATING: * -- Typical intense solid action for three minutes. The crowd was as dead for this as they were for RVD vs. Storm earlier.

-In a nice touch, they showed Booker T pacing backstage with Terri waiting to interview him after the break.

[commercial break]

-Terri interviewed Booker T who said Goldust is having neurological problems since being electrocuted. Terri said others have been laughing. Booker said it isn't funny.

-Backstage, Triple H, Ric Flair, Batista, and Randy Orton laughed about Goldust's condition. Triple H joked about Goldust being crispy. They also vowed to damage Steiner's chances against Hunter at the PPV.

-Jim Ross brought up to Jerry Lawler that they lost a member of the WWE family when Curt Hennig died last week. A video montage aired highlighting Hennig's Mr. Perfect skits achieving perfection in other sports. After the video aired, they showed a photo of Hennig as the crowd applauded. A nice gesture to do more to acknowledge his death than the usual bell salute at the start of a show. It's considered "risky business" to draw attention to every wrestling death since they happen so often that it can paint a negative picture of the industry, but in the case of Hennig, he was a big enough star over such a long span that they really needed to do more than usual for him. (I'm still disappointed with WWE for not mentioning Louie Spicolli during the montage of deceased WWE performers during the Raw Anniversary Show last month.)

[commercial break]

-Highlights aired of Teddy Long dropping D-Lo Brown last week. Rodney Mack, the new ring name for Redd Dogg, came to the ring with Teddy Long to total silence. WWE isn't sticking to storylines these days. You had John Cena with B2, but B2 was dropped so Redd Dogg could be with Cena; meanwhile, D-Lo joins up with the returning Teddy Long only to be dropped so Dogg could take his place, leaving Cena without a sidekick.

3 -- RODNEY MACK vs. AL SNOW

Snow came out with no hype, treated as nothing more than a rookie jobber. The announcers talked mostly about Ross's match against Bischoff later. "He's younger and he's in better shape, but I'm damn sure not afraid of him," Ross said. Snow went for a moonsault, but Mack raised his knees and then closed the match with his underhook powerbomb finisher. Snow landed on his head and was slow getting up. Ross did say Snow "is a great competitor."

WINNER: Mack at 1:55.

STAR RATING: 1/2* -- Not much to the match. It's still amazing how underutilized Al Snow is considering what they could have done with his character due to his exposure on Tough Enough. Do those in power even watch Tough Enough and see Snow's star power potential in that trainer role?

-Backstage Chris Jericho gloated that Michaels made a smart-ass comment to the wrong person on the wrong night, and now he's forced to face him tonight. Christian said the girls laugh when Jeff Hardy takes off his shirt, but for years girls have been screaming for him to take off his shirt. He dropped his straps to show off his chiseled upper body. Jericho said it's obvious he is a sexy man. Christian appears to have the upper body to get away with going with a strapless wrestling outfit.

[commercial break]

4 -- CHRISTIAN & CHRIS JERICHO vs. JEFF HARDY & SHAWN MICHAELS

"I'm not wrestling; I'm gonna fight that son of a bitch," Ross said, continuing his endorsement of the opportunity to face Bischoff in the ring. Michaels came to the ring in street clothes. Ross pointed out earlier that his luggage was caught on an airplane delay. Hardy leaped off the ring barrier toward Jericho, but Jericho caught him in mid-air and turned it into a bodyslam on the mat. Christian and Jericho then doubled on Michaels at ringside, throwing him into the ringside steps. Then they handcuffed Michaels to the ringpost. Michaels did his best to help even the odds, including kicking Jericho, and eventually he got the key and unlocked himself. He hot-tagged in at 5:30 and cleaned house on Christian. Hardy dove onto Christian at ringside. Meanwhile Jericho picked up a chair and swung toward Michaels, but Michaels kicked the chair into Jericho's face. Hardy then recovered and Swanton Dove onto Jericho for the win.

WINNERS: Hardy & Michaels at 7:22.

STAR RATING: ** -- The good athletic action you'd expect, although Jeff Hardy's heart still doesn't seem to be entirely into what he's doing. The match had an interesting twist with Michaels handcuffed to the ringpost for the middle portion of the match. Michaels and Hardy congratulated each other afterward, although it seemed more forced than heartfelt, not exactly the emotion you'd expect from a mentor-protege relationship after a big win.

[commercial break]

-Jericho threw a fit backstage over losing as Christian attempted to calm him down. Ross said Jericho wanted a rematch against Hardy.

-A clip aired of Bischoff announcing earlier that he was going to fight Ross.

5 -- HURRICANE vs. CHRISTOPHER NOWINSKI

Ross and Lawler talked throughout the match about how Nowinski thinks he's smarter than anyone who hasn't attended Harvard. Lawler responded, "Hey, we need common laborers." Hurricane still cracks me up with his exaggerated mannerisms. In the end, Hurricane blocked an underhook suplex attempt by Nowinski and then finished off Nowinski clean with a

WINNER: Hurricane at 3:45.

STAR RATING: * -- Solid short TV match. I was surprised to see Hurricane go over clean. Nowinski's style is crisper than it was just a few months ago when he wrestled in a "lanky" style, for lack of better term.

-Backstage Eric Bischoff warmed up in his karate gear, kicking pads held by Morley with Ross's picture taped to them. Bischoff delivered two sidekicks, four roundhouse kicks, and a spin wheel kick (after which he almost lost his balance when his leg got caught on top of the kicking pad). He sat down out of breath and talked about his lethal power.

[commercial break]

-They showed Scott Steiner working on his biceps backstage.

6 -- RICO & JAMAL & ROSIE vs. SPIKE DUDLEY.

Ross said this match is an example of Bischoff's abuse of power. Lawler begged Ross to leave just a little bit of Bischoff for Austin at No Way Out. Jamal splashed Spike at 3:10 as Rico and Rosie held Spike's limbs on the mat so he was totally vulnerable. Rico then scored the pin and celebrated as if he was won the World Title. They're still playing the same music for Rico that they did for Billy & Chuck.

WINNER: Jamal & Rosie & Rico at 3:29.

STAR RATING: 1/2* -- Just a squash. What a yawner of a show at this point. It's not even bad enough to be interesting. It's just blah. Not the best way to head into a PPV.

[commercial break]

-Ross and Lawler previewed No Way Out's complete line-up, including the Smackdown matches.

-Terri interviewed Scott Steiner backstage. Booker approached Steiner and said it was time to take out Triple H and Batista.

[commercial break]

7 -- BOOKER T & SCOTT STEINER vs. TRIPLE H & BATISTA (w/Randy Orton, Ric Flair)

Steiner tagged in and bashed Triple H with a convincing stiff series of clubs and chops. A few minutes later Booker hot-tagged in and did the same to Batista. When Booker did the Spinarooni, Batista blindsided him. Steiner, though, cleaned house on the heels, including Flair and Orton. Booker then hit Hunter with his Axe Kick for a clean three count.

WINNER: Booker & Steiner 6:57 when Booker pinned Hunter.

STAR RATING: ** -- The match did exactly what it needed to - which was make Steiner and Booker seem exciting and strong relative to Hunter. They certainly showed that Booker is headed toward a WrestleMania main event against Hunter by having him, rather than Steiner, score the pin on Hunter, especially considering that Steiner is six days away from headlining the PPV against Hunter. It's an intriguing decision, and is the type of booking decision that Pat McNeill discusses in this coming week's newsletter in his feature-length column.

-Lawler gave Ross a final pep talk for his match against Bischoff.

[commercial break]

-Just when things seemingly couldn't get worse... Johnathan Coachman joined Lawler.

-Bischoff sidekicked a single board, which he said represented Stone Cold's ribcage. He then punched a board and said his right fist even scares him. He then had a watermelon brought into the ring. He smashed it, prompting Coachman to say, "This gets more impressive by the minute." Nothing Coachman says ever shows any sense of perspective for what he's watching. He just has no credibility.

8 -- JIM ROSS vs. ERIC BISCHOFF (w/Sean Morley)

Bischoff told Ross before the match that it would be a no rules match where anything and anyone goes. He told Steve Austin, "who is watching is Texas," that he was going to kick his best friend's ass. Bischoff mocked Ross with Karate Kid mannerisms. Ross slapped Bischoff, knocking him to the ground. Morley then immediately attacked and began stomping away on Ross. Morley then set the cinder block against Ross's head. Bischoff then sidekicked the cinder block, shattering it over Ross's head. Lawler dropped his headset and charged to the ring for the save. He punched Morley a few times, then faced off with Bischoff. Bischoff gave Lawler a kick to the gut, which caused Lawler to pause for a moment. Morley then attacked Lawler from behind and threw him to ringside. Ross struggled to lift his head, which was bleeding from the forehead. Ross struggled to rise to his feet, but Bischoff punched him in the gut and took him to the mat. Bischoff covered Ross for the pin. Bischoff then mocked Austin by drinking beers and acted cocky over his win. Bischoff is a very good heel and this segment took advantage of his uncanny ability to project smarmy arrogance.

WINNER: Bischoff at 3:48.

STAR RATING: n/a -- It accomplished what it intended, which was building a desire to see Bischoff get his ass kicked by Austin. They did a nice job getting across Bischoff's legit karate background (he went to the same karate school I did, but he stopped going a couple years before I started around 1980).



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