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Keller's WWE Smackdown Report 5 Yrs. Ago: Long Hogan and Rock promos anchor the show
Feb 22, 2008 - 3:39:39 AM |
WWE SMACKDOWN
FEBRUARY 20, 2002
TAPED TUESDAY
-The Rock came out cold onto the stage without any announcer introduction at first wearing loose leather pants and a leather vest with (of course) sunglasses. It was a very effective way to present him for the first time in a WWE arena on TV in many months. He walked to the ring and got a mix of cheers and boos. He waited out the fan noise, which wasn't near the level of what Hulk Hogan received, but given his heel promos on TV in recent weeks, that's no surprise. I don't if anyone's ever mentioned this before, but Rock looks a little bit like a giant tall version of Sonny Siaki.
Rock said, "Finally... the Rock has come back to Indiana... ahh, who gives a crap?" Michael Cole chimed in and acknowledged fans chanting "Hogan, Hogan," and said Hulk Hogan is expected to arrive later. Rock said he expected he would come out and do his routine, but he senses the fans aren't into it. He said he's actually heard some people boo.
Seven minutes into rambling about the fans loyalty toward him, his cell phone rang. He told the crowd to be quiet because he was talking to his assistant. He told his assistant he would be back the next day because he didn't want to be around the hicks any more. When the crowd booed, he said he was talking about hickory trees. He then hung up the phone.
He asked the fans, "Do you really want to boo the Rock." Crowd boos. "Do you understand the line that you are crossing, where we are going if you boo The Rock. Do you people understand the ramifications of booing the great one."
He told them at No Way Out he would show them a side of Rock they've never seen. He then did a rhyme about what he was going to do to Hogan that would have made John Cena proud. He said Hogan was late as usual, but when he arrived, he would confront him face-to-face and tell him exactly what he was going to do to him at No Way Out. He concluded, or so it seemed, with "if you smell what the Rock is cookin'." Then he told the fans that they aren't allowed to chant along with him at the end after booing him. "You bunch of sheep, have some self-respect." He then insisted he finish his phrase alone, "... as the Rock is cookin'."
He's sooo much better in front of a live crowd interacting with the fans than pretending to interact from a soundstage in a pre-taped routine. He carried 14 minutes very well.
-Cole and Tazz talked about Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle. Cole called it perhaps the most anticipated match in Smackdown history.
[commercial break]
-Cole and Tazz talked about two huge boxes that were gifts from Big Show to Undertaker. At least the box gimmick wasn't brought out just for Brother Love. The fact that Love was just the start of an ongoing multiweek storyline makes the first skit a bit more understandable. Because if it went nowhere other than with Love, it would have really been pointless (and bad TV at the same time).
1 -- A-TRAIN vs. CHRIS BENOIT
Train overpowered Benoit early with some cool big-man moves, but Benoit reversed him into a Crossface. He followed with a series of German Suplexes, then rolled him up for a surprise three count out of nowhere. A-Train threw a fit in the ring.
WINNER: Benoit at 2:20.
STAR RATING: 3/4* -- Short, but what they did was solid.
-They showed Hulk Hogan arriving at the arena with a big grin on his face.
[commercial break]
2 -- RIKISHI vs. JOHNNY STAMBOLI (w/Nunzio, Chuck Palumbo)
Before the match Rikishi brawled at ringside with Nunzio and Palumbo. Nunzio and Palumbo were then sent to the back. Rikishi won clean because, after all, he's got a huge future in WWE, whereas Stamboli's been around forever and his act is stale. Wait, that's backwards. Oh well, at least after the match the heels triple-teamed Rikishi, getting their heat back. Boy, the fans are just itching to see Rikishi get his revenge because they relate so much to his charisma and exciting in-ring style. And those promos he's been doing lately have shown such creativity and passion.
WINNER: Rikishi at 1:44.
STAR RATING: 1/2* - Barely a match at under two minutes, but okay.
-Charlie Haas cheered on Kurt Angle and Shelton Benjamin as they warmed up against each other. Angle vowed to break Lesnar's ankle in the match.
[commercial break]
-A skit aired with Chavo and Eddie Guerrero visiting with a woman's baby on the sidewalk. They joked about how ugly the baby was after she left. Then Eddie showed off that he stole the woman's wallet, keys, and baby bottle. "If you're not cheating, you're not trying," they shout. The graphics and music were comical in tone. I'm not sure what they're trying to accomplish with that approach to character development since it's entertaining, but completely unrealistic within the context of WWE. A small thing, like having everyone acknowledge the cameras presence, would have made it seem more realistic, such as "The Guerreros Film a Documentary
-They showed Matt Hardy getting weighed in backstage, but being overweight slightly. He kept stripping until he reached 220, but that didn't happen until he was completely naked. He was so happy, he hugged Moore, who seemed a bit offput by Matt being naked while hugging him.
3 - SHANNON MOORE & MATT HARDY vs. KIDMAN & REY MYSTERIO
This week's Matt Facts: "Matt is miserable when dieting" and "Matt finds Shannon very hard to teach." At 3:00 Rey gave Matt the 619, but Matt came back with a sitdown powerbomb for a two count. He went for a second powerbomb, but Rey fought out of it and tagged Kidman, who blindsided Hardy with a top rope dropkick. Moore then executed a top rope legdrop onto Kidman and then Hardy made the cover, but only scored a two count. Rey gave Matt a huracanrana off the top rope. Kidman then was going to follow up with his Shooting Star Press, but Moore interfered. Matt then hit the neckbreaker for the three count. Cole plugged Hardy's Cruiserweight Title match against Kidman at the PPV.
WINNERS: Moore & Hardy at 4:45.
STAR RATING: ** -- Good five minute match. They had their timing down well during some pretty complicated three-way and four-way exchanges.
-Cole cheerfully began a sitdown interview with Nathan Jones, asking him how he likes America. He said Americans have been very forgiving of his past and he appreciates that. Cole asked him what his goals are. He said his ultimate goal is to be the next WWE Champion, but he said first he has unfinished business with the biggest dog in the yard. He then rambled incoherently about ticks and tocks as he grabbed Cole by the throat and shook and rolled his eyes to the back of his head.
-They showed Undertaker walking backstage, and speculated about the gifts Big Show has waiting for him.
[commercial breaks]
-Highlights aired of recent Undertaker-Big Show-Paul Heyman skits.
-Undertaker came to the ring and opened one of the big boxes in center ring. OUt popped a cocker spaniel, who had to be pretty freaked out by being locked in a dark box and then having someone as big and scary as Undertaker picking him up, only to them be greeted by over 10,000 people (more than the dog probably knew existed in the world) looking on. As Taker went to open the other box, he decided to kick the door in (you know, in case kitten were in there or something). Big Show then entered the ring and attacked Taker from behind and laid him out. Cole described what happened as "Big Show playing mind games with Taker." A sound, if not basic angle of a heel attacking a babyface a few days before a PPV.
[commercial break]
-The showed that during the commercial break, Big Show began yelling about beating up Taker at No Way Out before getting into a Towncar and being driven out of the arena.
4 -- TORRIE WILSON vs. NIDIA (w/Jamie Noble)
Noble attempted to interfere, but Wilson clotheslined him. Dawn Marie then ran to the ring to interfere, but Wilson knocked her off and Marie took a scary looking bump. Noble returned to the ring and flattened Torrie with a powerslam (and Torrie almost landed on her head). Then Nidia got the paddle off the pole to win. Funaki ran to the ring and beat up Noble, then checked on Wilson's condition. She hugged him and thanked him for his help.
WINNER: Nidia.
STAR RATING: 1/2* -- Not much to it, but okay finishing sequence.
-Hogan tried to get to Rock's locker room door, but two security guards wouldn't let him in. Hogan said if Rock didn't want to hear from him now, he'll have to listen to him talk from the ring.
[commercial break]
-Hogan came to the ring to cheers. Rock's music then started and he had a staredown with Hogan. Cole noted that anytime a Rock chant started, a Hogan chant would completely overwhelm it within seconds. Rock demanded someone at ringside give him a bottle of water. Cole said he's been talking about himself all night, no wonder he needs water. Rock quietly told Hogan that he put a lot of thought into things and he's concluded that Hogan should apologize to him. Hogan seemed offended. Fans chanted "Rocky socks." Rock complained, "You called Rock a Rockajobroni?" Rock told Hogan, "You should know your role and shut your mouth." Rock seemed a bit nervous as he complained Hogan. "One year ago you were nothing, you were worthless. It was only when Rock challenged you to go to WrestleMania that you became popular again. You think this whole rebirth of Hulkamania is because of you? No, no no. Your entire career resurgence is because of the Great One. The Rock took pity on you because Rock is your friend, Rock cares about you. That Muppet commercial you do is because of the Rock. Are you going to apologize to Rock - yes or no? I'll give you one more chance? Are you going to apologize to the Rock, yes or no?" Hogan said, "Hell no!" The crowd cheered. "Because, Rockajobroni, you are not responsible for the rebirth of Hulkamania, brother. All these Hulkamaniacs, they're the ones who are responsible." Rock mockingly said he forget that everybody loves Hulk Hogan. "Well whoopdido, everybody loves Hulk Hogan."
Rock then reminded Hogan of what happened at WrestleMania last year. "Maybe you don't remember because The Rock whipped your ass so bad," he added. Rock tried to get the crowd to say "millions and millions," but it wasn't as loud as usual, although probably not as quiet as he needed it to be to do his routine as planned. Rock began mocking Hogan's "whatcha gonna do" routine. Hogan made a move toward Rock, so Rock backed through the ropes. He begged Hogan not to rip off his shirt because it gets the crowd crazy, and then Hogan would try to beat him up. Rock said, "I didn't mean anything I was saying. I was just entertaining. You know that. I have much love and respect for you. Let's electrify this Sunday like I know you and the Rock can." He then held out his hand for a handshake. "That's big of the Rock," said Tazz. Cole added, "Maybe the Rock was just acting." Tazz said Rock is a gentleman. Rock pulled the hand away and spat at his face, then ran up the ramp. Hogan wiped his face as Rock celebrated his gesture of disrespect. "It's been a long time since I've seen the Rock act like that."
[commercial break]
-They replayed Rock spitting at Hogan.
-Cole and Tazz talked about the line-up for No Way Out.
-A video package aired previewing the Angle-Lesnar advertised main event.
-Backstage John Cena told Brock that he was declaring war on him. "I will be watching everything you do 24/7. "Because your brain is so small, I won't be hard to find." He added, "This is prison, we are inmates, and you just dropped the soap." Cena showed he can do a serious promo in addition to his typical rap routine which is more entertainment-oriented than passionate or intense.
-Brock Lesnar came to the ring. At this point, even if the show were live, it would have been obvious that the match wasn't going to take place because they hadn't hyped it all that much throughout the show. When they feel guilty about a borderline or outright "bait and switch," they shy away from heavy hype. If Angle and Brock were really wrestling an all-out match, they would have mentioned it 20 more times than they did.
[commercial break]
-When Angle came to the ring, he told Brock he agreed last week to wrestle him, but he didn't say the stipulations. He said the stips were that he had to beat Charlie Haas, then Shelton Benjamin, and then he could face him. The entire time Angle explained the stips, the producers lack so much confidence in Brock's facial expressions that they barely showed him. That's because Brock has one facial expression most of the time, a and it sends the signal that there isn't much going on in his head - although that's not necessarily a bad thing considering the context of his character, which is more physical than mental.
5 -- BROCK LESNAR vs. CHARLIE HAAS (w/Kurt Angle, Shelton Benjamin, Paul Heyman)
Haas took Lesnar down early in the match. Lesnar came back and finished off Haas with the F-5 for the win.
WINNER: Brock at 2:40.
STAR RATING: 1/2* -- Short, but it accomplished what it needed to.
[commercial break]
6 -- SHELTON BENJAMIN vs. BROCK LESNAR
Shelton got in more offense on Brock than Haas did, including stomping away at him in the corner and allying an armbar. Angle at ringside told Benjamin that he can't F5 him if his arm is weakened. Brock, though, eventually lifted Benjamin and slammed him to the mat. Brock gave him two overhead suplexes. Angle distracted Brock. Shelton tried to blindside Brock, but Brock blocked him and hit an Angle Slam to pin Lesnar.
WINNER: Angle at 4:02.
STAR RATING: * -- Solid action. Again, it accomplished what it needed to.
7 -- KURT ANGLE vs. BROCK LESNAR
Angle hesitated to enter the ring, but Paul Heyman gave him a pep talk. When Angle entered the ring, Heyman gave Lesnar a chairshot from behind. Angle then choked Lesnar from behind. Lesnar dumped Angle over the top rope to escape, and then went after Heyman. He ripped Heyman's suit jacket off and then set up the F5, but Angle clipped Brock from behind to stop him. Team Angle then triple-teamed Brock as the bell rang frantically. Angle applied the Anklelock. Edge and Chris Benoit charged the ring to make the save popping the crowd, thus promoting the six-man tag match at the PPV on Sunday.
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