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By Wade Keller, Torch editor

This begins a series of WrestleMania-related features as we count down the final days to WrestleMania 24...

WWE WRESTLEMANIA 23 REPORT - PART 2 OF 2
APRIL 1, 2007
DETROIT, MICH. AT FORD FIELD

5 -- ECW ORIGINALS (Sabu & Rob Van Dam & Sandman & Tommy Dreamer) vs. THE NEW BREED (Matt Striker & Marcus Cor Von & Elijah Burke & Kevin Thorn).

A few minutes in, the heels isolated on Dreamer. Dreamer gave both a combo DDT/neckbreaker on both Burke and Cor Von. Tazz said he wanted to say he never thought he'd see the day ECW was on a WrestleMania. RVD got the hot-tag at 5:00. Sabu flip dove over the top rope and folded in half. Dreamer, meanwhile, beat up Striker in the ring, then posed with his arms extended. Bad idea in an eight-man tag match, as he was jumped frombehind. RVD a minute later hit a Five-Star on Striker for the three count.

WINNER: ECW Originals in 6:00.

STAR RATING: *3/4 -- Not a lot to it, but okay. Not dragged out. Surprising finish, but either way it doesn't matter much.

-An "All Grown Up" video feature aired on Steve Austin.

-A video aired announced that The Citrus Bowl in Orlando, Fla. would host WrestleMania 24 next year.

-Ross and Lawler acknowledged Thomas "The Hitman" Hearns.

6 -- UMAGA (w/Vince McMahon) vs. BOBBY LASHLEY (w/Donald Trump) -- Billionaire Hair Match

Ross and Lawler announced this match. Vince came out first and played with the barber equipment at ringside. Then Umaga with Armando Alejandro Estrada. Then Donald Trump walked out with his signature gut-hiding long jacket. He had the blond woman with him, of course. Then Lashley came out. Then Austin. In the opening minute, Lashley hit Umaga with a barrage of punches. Austin forced a break. Lashley turned to complain to Austin. Umaga hit lashley from behind. A minute later, Lashley hit a shoulder tackle and went for a pin. Estrada put Lashley's leg over the bottom rope to stop the count. Lashley yanked Estrad into the ring and gave him a running powerslam, then threw him over the top rope to the floor. Umaga charged Lashley, but Lashley ducked and Umaga hit the floor with a thud on his butt. Umaga got up and checked on the KO'd Estrada at ringside. Lashley dove at Umaga, but Umaga side-stepped him and Lashley flew through the ropes to the floor. At 3:00, Umaga choked Lashley. Austin began his count. Umaga yapped at Austin. Umaga went back to the choke. Austin yanked Umaga off by the braids. Umaga dominated Lashley methodically for a couple of minutes. Lashley tried to lift Umaga for a bodyslam, but Lashley fell backward leading to a two count Vince stood on the ring apron, but Lashley ran the ropes and knocked him to the floor. They showed Trump at ringside yell, "Shake it off, Lashley. Come on!"

Lashley press slammed Umaga to the mat. Both men were down as Austin began his count. Before he got to ten, he just stopped. Austin signalled someone is going to get their head shaved, so he's not ending the match in a draw. He said no countouts. Shane McMahon ran to ringside to check on Vince. Umaga punched at Lashley in the corner of the ring. Austin yanked him off of Lashley by his eye socket. Shane entered the ring. Austin turned to Shane, so Shane bailed out. Umaga surprised Austin with a punch, and Austin took a hard flatback bump and rolled out of the ring. Shane entered the ring and punched away at Lashley. Lashley grabbed Shane. Umaga then attacked Lashley from behind. Shane and Umaga doubled on Lashley. Umaga charged Lashley's head with a butt-butt. Vince handed Shane a trasih can. Shane gloated to Trump, then hit a cross-ring dropkick into the trash can, kicking it into Lashley's face. Shane removed his shirt to reveal a referee shirt underneath. He dragged Lashley to center-ring and left him there for Umaga to hit his top rope splash. As Shane began his three count, Austin yanked him out of the ring by the leg. Austin threw Shane into the ringside steps, then returned to the ring. Umaga punched Austin again. They showed Trump saying, unconvincingly, "What's going on here."

Trump then charged at McMahon with a diving and threw some punches at him. Trump didn't look like he's ever been in a fight in his life the way he tackled and punched Vince. Austin hit the Stunner on Umaga. Lashley hit a Spear and scored the three count. The bell rang before the third count. Someone's getting chewed out for that.

WINNER: Lashley in 13:00.

STAR RATING: *1/2 -- A train wreck. Not horrible, but not good. Trump was pretty bad in his role, but not as bad as some may have feared. Austin was good. Lashley and Umaga were just background players.

-Vince began making Eugene faces. Austin threw McMahon into the ring and grabbed him by his tie. Shane hit Austin from behind. Austin hit Shane with a Thesz Press and a barage of punches and his elbow drop followed by a Stunner. They showed Vince trying to sneak away on all fours. Vince began backing up toward the stage, looking lke he couldn't be caught. Lashley chased him down and carried him back to the ring. Austin walked up behind Vince. Vince felt behind him and rubbed Austin's bald head. Austin then gave McMahon a Stunner and strapped him into the barber chair. Trump pulled out clippers. Lashley did also. They each shaved half of his head as McMahon cried and Austin held him in place. Then they squirted shaving cream all over his head, then took a pair of razors to his head to really shave him bald. Lashley held a mirror up to McMahon, who was shaved pretty close to bald except for a nub on the back. McMahon saw himself and tried to tip himself over in shock, but he couldn't get the chair to fall over. Austin helped. Austin then walked to the back, hunched over and humiliated. Austin then surprised Trump with a Stunner. Trump didn't take it well, but he took it. Trump's weird hair flew all over the place. That footage will be studied by those fascinated by Trump's hair for decades.

-Cole and Tazz talked about the WrestleMania Bonus Match that took place before the PPV began. Ric Flair & Carlito won a lumberjack tag match over Chavo Guerrero & Gregory Helms. Snitsky, Shannon Moore, Johnny Nitro, and others left off the show were the lumberjacks, getting their chance to be at the ringside area at the big show. The downside is it does damage to the idea that a lumberjack match is a special stip to keep heels from escaping the match.

7 -- MELINA vs. ASHLEY - Women's Title Lumberjill Match

This is the traditional role for the women's match at big shows - to give everyone a chance to take a deep breath. The crowd was quiet for this. Melina whipped Ashley around by her legs. Ashley ran the ropes at half speed. They went into a bridge pin into a reversal with Melina scoring the leverage pin. The lumberjills had a big batttle royal style brawl after the match for a half minute. They played Ashley's music for some reason as she stood in the ring even though Melina clutched her title at ringside.

WINNER: Melina in 3:00.

STAR RATING: neg. *

-They revealed that the fan mobile vote picked Cena to beat Michaels by a 59-41 percent margin. The fans picked Undertaker to beat Batista by an 82-18 margin.

-A video feature aired hyping the Cena-Michaels main event.

8 -- JOHN CENA vs. SHAWN MICHAELS - WWE Hvt. Title match

Michaels came out first to the DX music. They went outside Ford Field with a Mustang speeding around the streets of Detroit. It sped into the arena, squeeling its tires. It burst through a wall of glass with the WrestleMania logo on it. Then, after about 30 seconds for Cena and the real driver to climber over each to switch places, Cena got out of the driver's side as if he was the driver. Cena was booed once he entered the ring. Michaels looked more orange than Hulk Hogan ever did. His lips took on a weird color, too. At that point, a fan made his way all the way into the ring where he ripped off his white shirt. Michaels smiled and waved at the fans being dragged out by security. The two had a mid-ring staredown and yap-session. Michaels slapped Cena. Cena swung at Michaels. Michaels ducked and knocked Cena down, then crotched chopped his direction. Ross and Lawler said Michaels was outwrestling and outclassing Cena in the opening minutes with wrestling moves. Michaels took Cena to the mat with a hip toss and then applied a side headlock.

At 4:00 Cena hit a clothesline, his first real offensive move of the match. The crowd booed. Cena threw Michaels over the top rope, but when Cena approached him, Michaels dropped him throat-first over the top rope, then hip-tossed Cena over the top rope to the floor. Michaels threw a stiff chop to Cena's chest, then enzuigiri'd him. He rolled into the ring to break the ref's count. Ross said he could see worry in Cena's eyes. Michaels then flipped onto Cena with a springboard moonsault onto the announcing table. Fans chanted "HBK, HBK." Back in the ring at 7:00, Michaels chopped Cena's chest in the corner. Michaels began concentrating on Cena's left leg with stomps. He yanked his leg into the ringpost. The ref asked if Cena could continue. Michaels methodically continued working over Cena. The slow early pace of the match indicated they were going well past the 20 minute mark. The fans seemed to grow impatient, wanting more of an adrenaline rush type of match. Every time Cena showed signs of life, the crowd reacted with a mix of deep boos and high-pitched cheers. Michaels charged at Cena. Cena moved and Michaels went head-first into the ringpost.

Cena then made a full-fledged comeback at 13:00 and did the UCCMe and fistdrop routine. Michaels came up bleeding heavily and escaped an FU. Cena whipped Michaels into the corner. Michaels flipped into the corner. Michaels went for a superkick, but Cena ducked and the ref took the kick. Cena then gave Michaels an FU attempt, but Michaels countered mid-move into a DDT. Michaels got up slowly and smelled his own blood. He went to ringside and unstacked the ringside steps. He dragged Cena onto the bottom step and piledriver Cena on them. It looked more realistic than that move usually does. Cena came up with a gash on the back of his head. A second ref ran to the ring as Michaels made the cover. Cena kicked out and a chorus of boos followed.

At 18:00, Michaels nipped up and climbed to the top rope. He came off with a flying elbow to Cena's chest. Michaels stomped the mat and signalled for Sweet Chin Music. Cena caught a charging Michaels with a clothesline to flatten him. That spot is the epitome of making Michaels decision to telegraph his finisher with stomps seem as stupid as the camera inside the baby carriage was earlier. They traded blows with the same boo/cheer mix as whhen Batista and Undertaker were doing it earlier. Cena hit an FU for a near fall at 22:00. Ross described this as a "memorable confrontation," which was relatively soft praise since he recognized that to that moment, it was a bit of a letdown. Michaels climbed to the top rope and dove at Cena, who rolled through and rose to his feet with Michaels in his arms. Then he lifted him for another FU. Michaels flipped out of it and went for a superkick. Cena slipped under the kick and went for an STFU. Michaels ended up going for an inside cradle. Cena came back and locked on the STFU. Michaels reached the ropes. Cena wouldn't break at first. The ref scolded him. Michaels surprised him with a kick. Both men were down. Cena got up first. He went for an FU. Michaels countered. Cena countered back and quickly applied the STFU. Michaels was center-ring and teased tapping, then he did tap.

WINNER: Cena in 27:00 to retain the WWE Title.

STAR RATING: **** -- The last five or ten minutes saved it, but four stars might be generous. Ross called it an "amazing WrestleMania main event," but even his praise seemed reserved. It was good, but it took a long time to get out of second gear. Michaels is really strong in 20 minute matches, but once you book him for more than that, he often slows down too much for the first half of the match for the "slow build." I'd say Taker-Batista was a notch better than Michaels-Cena. They were very different matches.

-Cena looked at the camera as he celebrated and said, "This was for you, Dad!" Cena approached Michaels afterward in the aisle. Michaels walked away without a hand shake. Cena saluted him anyway.

-The annual WrestleMania Highlight Video aired, which is one of the great production achievements of the year for WWE as the turnaround time on it for the quality level is astounding. They showed a clip of Hulk Hogan slamming Andre the Giant, then went right to Kane bodyslamming Great Khali. That's a stretch in terms of historical significance.

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