By Wade Keller, Torch editor

WWE RAW REPORT
NOVEMBER 24, 2003
LIVE FROM SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH

-After the opening montage, Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler introduced the show as Eric Bischoff entered the ring with the Raw Roulette Wheel. Bischoff took some shots at the Salt Lake City fans, mentioning that the guys in the crowd had probably been asking their several wives what the roulette wheel is all about. He said even though the Raw Roulette idea is taken from Las Vegas, he felt Salt Lake City fans needed some excitement. Shawn Michaels interrupted. He said since Bischoff interrupted him last week, he's going to return the favor. He said he thought about what Bischoff told him last week about being responsible for the departure of Steve Austin. Michaels said he looked himself in the mirror and he realized he put up the fight of his life to win that match. He said if it wasn't for Evolution, he would have won the match. Batista came out and took exception with Bischoff saying Michaels was to blame for Austin's forced departure. He said he (Batista) deserved credit. Michaels called Batista to the ring. Bischoff said he had given the fans in Salt Lake City too much, so he was going to hold off booking that match until "his next PPV," Armageddon. He then said he'd like to get them involved in the show, and he turned to the roulette wheel. He said there was no need to spin it, because it was already pointing to "Eric Bischoff's Choice." He said his choice for a match was Batista and Ric Flair against Shawn Michaels and his WrestleMania opponent, Chris Jericho. Bischoff really strung out the mentioning of Jericho's name, as if he forgot who he was supposed to say. He pointed out that Jericho was his WrestleMania opponent earlier this year who had busted him open with a chair.

[Commercial Break]

-Lita came out to the ring for her match. Bischoff interrupted on the big screen. He said he wasn't thrilled that Christian called in one of his favors to bring Lita back after he fired her, but the more he thought about it, the more satisfied he was with the prospects of having more chances to mess with her. He said he and Molly were going to spin the wheel to see what kind of match she'd be wrestling. It came up "Cage Match." He said it was the first time in WWE history that two women fought in a cage.

1 -- LITA vs. VICTORIA

Lita looked worried, which didn't make a lot of sense since the odds were still even in a one-on-one match. As a babyface, she should have been just as brave or braver than the heel opponent. Lita climbed to the top of the cage at 1:45 to try to escape the cage. She kicked off Victoria first few attempts to grab her, but finally Victoria yanked her to the mat. Lita climbed to the top rope and slipped to the mat, something Ross pointed out. She hit Victoria with a moonsault at 3:40. Lita then attempted to escape the cage through the door, but Matt Hardy ran out and slammed the door on her face. Victoria then crawled out to win. Hardy then entered the cage and grabbed Lita's by the hair. Christian charged to the ring to chase after Hardy, but Hardy escaped over the cage and smiled as he backed up toward the stage.

WINNER: Victoria at 4:09

STAR RATING: * - Good energy, but not much time to do a full-fledged match.

-Eric Bischoff told Randy Orton, with a woman on each arm, that he spun the wheel a few moments ago and it came up on "Legend Killer Match," so he thought he'd be the right one to include in the match. Orton was all for that. Hurricane and Rosey showed up out of nowhere. They said they wanted a match. Bischoff said their match was against each other. He spun the wheel and it came up, "Capture the Midget." Bischoff called for "Fernando." A "midget" showed up, then ran away. He told Hurricane and Rosey the first to capture the midget won. Hurricane said "midget" isn't a very politically correct term, so what if they refuse. Bischoff said then it becomes a "Loser Gets Fired" match. Hurricane told Rosey to stay put, then he ran out of the room. Rosey figured out what was happening, so he ran out of the room a few seconds later.

[Commercial Break]

2 -- RANDY ORTON vs. SGT. SLAUGHTER

When Orton came out, Lawler wondered what legend would be wrestling Orton. Ross ran down Orton's opponents in the past, then plugged RVD vs. Orton for the IC Title at Armageddon. Then Sarge came out. Ross mentioned that he is a former WWE Champion. Lawler said, "He is a true legend." Ross said that when talking to Sarge a couple weeks ago, he brought up how he had wrestled Randy Orton's grandfather and father in his career. Sarge put on the Cobra Clutch right away. Fans chanted "USA, USA." Sarge seemed in better shape than he has been for past post-retirement matches and even a few pre-retirement matches. He got an early two count on Orton. Orton came back with a sleeper at 1:20. Sarge reversed it into a Cobra Clutch. Orton reached the top rope to force a break. Orton followed up with an RKO out of nowhere for the win. When Orton stomped away at Sarge afterward, RVD ran out for the save, hitting Orton with a nice dropdown wheel kick. RVD set up a Frog Splash, but he postured to the crowd while on the top rope, giving Orton a chance to bail out of the ring. Sarge and RVD held up each other's arms after the match, then playfully applied the Cobra Clutch.

WINNER: Orton at 1:55.

STAR RATING: 1/2* -- Fine for what it was. Not much was asked of Sarge, but it gave Sarge enough offense to please the crowd without making Orton look weak.

-Clips aired of the Triple H vs. Goldberg feud, then Ross and Lawler plugged the Triple H vs. Goldberg match coming up "in just a few minutes."

[Commercial Break]

-Ross plugged a Goldberg feature on Heat next week. It makes sense to cross-promote the B-shows on Raw and Smackdown. I never understood why they haven't done more of that in recent years.

-Lance Storm asked Val Venis if the women were really going to show up. Val said yes. Storm asked where he gets the women. Val said he has his means. The women showed up. They said they hear that wrestlers are quite crazy. Storm interrupted and said that's not at all true. Then the "midget" showed up and Rosey and Hurricane tried to capture him. Hurricane swung a butterfly net at him.

-Coach interviewed Ric Flair. He said he must be proud that his DVD is the fastest selling in WWE history. Flair said he is proud of his past. Then he cut an old-style promo for his tag match later against Michaels & Jericho, and then plugged Triple H's title match against Goldberg.

-Matt Hardy told Bischoff regarding Lita, he has "officially slammed the door on that chapter in his life." Bischoff used Austin's autobiography as a coaster. He looked at the camera and wished Austin a happy Thanksgiving. He said he hopes he doesn't break down and cry after his special air on UPN this week because it will be his last moment in the spotlight. Hardy spun the wheel and it came up "Strange Bedfellows." Hardy said, "I don't know what you've heard, but V1 is all man, V1 is straight." Bischoff said it had to do with having a strange partner in a tag match. Hardy said everyone wants to rub shoulders with him, so all is well. He smiled and headed to the ring.

-Really good pacing to the show so far. Although not much wrestling action, the hype so far has done a good job setting up the matches later in the show and the next PPV.

[Commercial Break]

-Ross and Lawler commented as videogame clips aired of potential moves between Hunter and Goldberg. Nice technique to hype a match and a videogame.

3 -- MATT HARDY & CHRISTIAN vs. BUBBA RAY DUDLEY & GARRISON CADE

Ross pointed out how Hardy and Christian had battled in TLC matches in the past, and now had to team up. Hardy and Bubba had a few exchanges. Hardy tagged in Christian and ordered him into the ring. Cade and Christian then battled for a minute. Christian took over offense at 1:45 with an eye poke. Once Christian had Cade down, Hardy demanded Christian tag him in. Christian ignored him. Ross talked about how much Hardy disappointed him by humiliating Lita by dumping her on national TV. Cade hot-tagged Dudley who tossed around Christian. Dudley was back to long pants this week, so someone talked some sense into him or the people who decide what he wears. Bubba missed a senton off the middle rope when Christian moved. Christian went to tag Hardy, but Hardy dropped down to the floor and taunted Christian. Bubba then gave Christian a Bubba Bomb. Cade tagged in and gave Christian a top rope elbow for the win. Dudley's attention was turned toward Hardy at ringside and didn't even know Cade had tagged himself in. He turned to Cade after the match and yelled at him for stealing his thunder. Cade offered him the tag title belt, but when Bubba grabbed it, Cade didn't let go at first. That drew some "ohhhs" from the crowd. Bubba grabbed the belt and told him to watch his step. Cade smiled as he left the ring.

WINNERS: Dudley & Cade at 3:56.

STAR RATING: *1/4 -- Good short match.

-They showed Hunter, with Flair, headed toward the entrance.

[Commercial Break]

-Terri asked Michaels if he is worried about his tag match scheduled later. Michaels says he has never been able to stand Jericho, but he'll overcome the odds. Michaels then told terri there is a "midget" staring up her dress. Fernando ran off as Hurricane and Rosey chased after him. Terri also chased after him and called him a pervert. They've done a nice job continuing to hammer home various key points in this show, including not going too long without mentioning the top two TV matches. The "midget" capture is terrible un-P.C., but kinda funny, too (in very small doses, which is how it's being presented).

4 -- GOLDBERG (w/Ric Flair) vs. TRIPLE H -- World Hvt. Title match

Ross said during ring intros not to underestimate the Flair factor. He said Hunter is obsessed with regaining the title and doesn't feel complete without the belt. Lawler said he's been in a lot of big matches himself, and he has "that feeling" that Triple H "by hook or by crook" is going to do it somehow. They had a trash talking nose-to-nose session at the start. Flair distracted Goldberg, giving Hunter a chance to attack him from behind. Goldberg is often booked to "look stupid" in his matches. He's just a little too easily distracted. Goldberg fought back quickly with two hard clotheslines. Hunter bailed out to ringside. Goldberg punched away at Hunter at ringside at 1:15. Hunter turned the momentum by 2:00 and threw Goldberg into the stairs at ringside. Goldberg shook his right arm, prompting Lawler to grossly exaggerate that he "dislocated his shoulder." Back in the ring at 2:30 Hunter began to work over Goldberg. Ross said we've seen Hunter go through long stretches of matches without making any mistakes. Flair choked Goldberg with his sports jacket as Hunter talked with the ref. When Hunter mounted the top rope, Goldberg recovered and pressed him to the mat at 4:00. Goldberg sideslammed Hunter, then set up the Spear. Hunter saw it coming and bailed out to ringside, prompting boos from the crowd. Goldberg chased after Hunter at ringside. Back in the ring, Hunter blocked a backdrop attempt by turning it into a kneelift. He scored a two count. Goldberg came back shortly thereafter and press slammed Hunter. When Flair jumped on the ring apron, Goldberg punched him off the apron. Orton ran into the ring. Goldberg gave him a Spear, prompting the ref to call for the DQ. Hunter gave Goldberg a Pedigree and the ref began to count, which made absolutely no sense. Kane's music and fireworks then blasted and he walked out. Ross said if the bell had not sounded, "there is no doubt Goldberg would not have kicked out of the Pedigree." What a mess that finish was. After Hunter turned back after looking at Kane, Goldberg gave him a Spear. Kane then attacked Goldberg as Hunter bailed out to ringside and retreated to the back. Kane then attacked Goldberg for more than a minute before bailing out.

WINNER: Goldberg via DQ at 6:45.

STAR RATING: *3/4 -- The match seemed a bit crammed into a smaller timeframe than it needed as the transitions were a bit sudden, but solid action for the most part otherwise. The premature DQ bell hurt the impact of the finish and post-match angle. Ross was in the difficult position of trying to explain how Hunter would have won the match if not for Kane, even though it made no sense that the ref was counting after he had already presumably called for the DQ. It seems pretty clear the bell wasn't supposed to sound when it first did. By placing the match mid-way through the show, you knew it wouldn't be a clean finish. When Lawler said he felt a title change coming, you knew there wouldn't be a title change (since wrestling announcers historically never predict a title change if one is coming because, in theory, that "ruins the surprise.")

-Hunter chewed out Bischoff backstage. He said he wants another shoat t the World Heavyweight Championship. He then stopped in mid-sentence when Kane brushed up against him. Kane demanded a World Title match. Bischoff was about to announce Kane vs. Goldberg, but Hunter interrupted him. Bischoff changed his mind, but Kane interrupted him. Bischoff then announced Kane vs. Hunter vs. Goldberg in a triple threat match for the World Title. Bischoff asked if everyone was happy. Kane said he was happy. He asked Hunter how he felt. Hunter unconvincingly said, "Swell, I love it." Kane left. Hunter shot Bischoff an evil look and then grunted as he left the room.

[Commercial Break]

-They showed Rosey and Hurricane chasing the "midget" outside in the parking lot.

-Bischoff met with Teddy Long and Mark Henry backstage by the wheel. Bischoff spun it and it finished on "Salt Lake City Street Fight." Henry grabbed a trash can and left the room and headed to the ring.

5 -- BOOKER T vs. MARK HENRY

Booker snuck up to the stage and stood next to the entrance. He asked the crowd to be quiet. Henry walked out with his trash can and a stop sign. When Henry walked out, Booker attacked him from behind and then used the stop sign as a weapon. Booker scored a two count at 2:30 after spraying Henry with a fire extinguisher and hitting a scissors kick. Henry came back with a trash can shot to the head and scored the pin.

WINNER: Henry at 3:15.

STAR RATING: 1/2* -- Fine for a short hardcore TV match, but this match has played itself out in recent years.

[Commercial Break]

-Bischoff revealed to Trish that she had to have a "bra and panties" match. Trish left the room and there stood Jericho. He said he could talk to Bischoff of changing the match stips. She said she was okay with it, then she told Jericho to do the right thing and "be the man I know you are." She said if he's good out there tonight, maybe she'll be good to him later tonight. Jericho seemed to be in the midst of a moral dilemma.

-Ross and Lawler plugged the Austin special on UPN, this Wednesday at 9 p.m. ET/8 p.m. CT. Lawler said the show will be the fix for those having Stone Cold withdrawal. He said fans should especially take note of Austin's comments on the late Owen Hart. Rosey and Hurricane chased Fernando in the arena bowl. Fernando leaped into Ross's lap. Lillian Garcia announced he was the winner of the "Capture the Midget" match. Total screwjob finish! Just kidding. Who cares, right? Actually, it was a pretty lame finish.

-Rob Van Dam entered the ring for his match. Bischoff revealed from backstage that he spun the wheel a moment earlier and it came up as a handicapped match. Orton told Bischoff that RVD seemed to have a lot of energy when he attacked him earlier, so he should have more added on top of it. Bischoff spun it and it came up Singapore Cane. Ross said, "I think this sucks? Who is going to face RVD? How many opponents will there be? We'll find out next!"

[Commercial Break]

6 -- ROB VAN DAM vs. SCOTT STEINER & TEST (w/Stacy)

RVD fended off Steiner and Test for the first few seconds, but ended up beaten down by the canes until a comeback at 2:00. Test mistakenly hit Steiner with the cane at 2:30. RVD then came off the top rope with a Five-Star Splash on Steiner at 2:40. Test then hit RVD from behind and scored the pin.

WINNERS: Steiner & Test at 2:49.

STAR RATING: 1/4* -- Lame-O

-Jericho tried to talk Bischoff out of making Trish wrestle in a Bra and Panties match. Bischoff said he's really fallen for her and laughed. He then shifted to talking about his match later teaming with Michaels. Jericho told Bischoff he knows him well enough to know he'll do the right thing. Bischoff smiled.

[Commercial Break]

7 -- JACKIE (w/Rico) vs. TRISH STRATUS

Ross wondered during ring intros if Rico would be wrestling. Lawler assured us that Jackie was the only one wearing a bra and panties. Now, how could he possibly know whether Rico was wearing panties? Unless... Has it all been an act by Lawler all along? Nah. Jackie attacked Trish from behind. Jackie immediately went for Trish's pants, but Trish blocked it and yanked off Jackie's top, revealing her bra. Jackie choked Trish with her top. Jackie somehow made a lift for a bodyslam seem fake when she held her arms out and waited for Trish to leap into them. Jackie yanked off Trish's top. Trish came back with chops at 1:00. When Trish went for a huracanrana, Jackie began yanking off her pants. Rico tried to interfere, but Trish yanked off his pants revealing Rico was wearing "panty-like" pink bikini briefs. Rico showed off by doing a little dance. "He's not even embarrassed," moaned Ross. Trish then ripped off Jackie's pants to win. After the match, Jackie yanked off Lilian's top. Lillian whipped her with her shirt in return. Lillian, like Rico, enjoyed the attention and entered the ring and swung her top over her head proudly.

WINNER: Trish at 2:02.

STAR RATING: DUD -- From a pure wrestling standpoint, this was really awkward. Of course, it wasn't presented to be a good wrestling match.

-Jericho congratulated Trish backstage and asked if their date was on for later. Trish said it depended on his actions in the main event.

-They showed Michaels heading toward the entrance. Ross wondered aloud if it'd be an HBK slaughter.

[Commercial Break]

8 -- SHAWN MICHAELS & CHRIS JERICHO vs. RIC FLAIR & BATISTA

Michaels and Flair began against each other. Michaels took control, then tagged in a hesitant Jericho. Jericho caught a charging Flair with an elbow and then hit a top rope elbow for a two count. Jericho chopped Flair in the corner. Flair did his face-first bump to the mat. Jericho followed with a bulldog. Flair tagged in Batista who worked over Jericho. Lawler praised Jericho for being a good partner for Michaels. Flair called for a tag and went to the top rope. Lawler asked, "Has that ever worked." Ross said, "Not in this decade." Sure enough, Jericho slammed him to the mat. Ross said he'll keep trying. Jericho hot-tagged Michaels. On a whip into the ropes, Flair slipped and caught his face on the top rope on the rebounded. Flair bailed out to ringside as the crowd "ohhed" and "ahhed." He began bleeding from the nose. Flair returned to the ring and thumbed Michaels in the eye. Batista entered the ring, but Michaels sidestepped him, so Batista flew to the mat. Michaels mistakenly punched Jericho, thinking it was Flair. Michaels then gave Flair his Sweet Chin Music. Jericho then gave Michaels a superkick to the face, but Michaels's arm landed over Flair's chest and he got the win. Jericho headed to the back with a smile on his face.

WINNERS: Michaels & Jericho at 5:13.

STAR RATING: *3/4 -- Disappointingly short.

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