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Absurdity of it All
ABSURDITY OF IT ALL - TNA PPV: What If Final Resolution Was The Last Wrestling PPV?, Birthday Hat Shout-Out, Feast Or Fired, Worst Game Of Tag

Dec 12, 2011 - 9:36:04 AM
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By Shane McKinley, PWTorch Absurdity specialist
TNAFinalRes_5.jpg

Wouldn't it be cool if Final Resolution was the final wrestling PPV ever? Like, the wrestling business is going to explode on Monday and Final Resolution was the final gasp from wrestling? Man. Just cherish the memories of ... Booby Boob playing the world's worst game of tag with A.J. Styles. "I'm going to walk slowly away from you with one minute left to go! Oh, I win! Hey, fans, buy our next PPV!"

You know a PPV is bad when it's boring birthday hat boy day (as referenced to by James Storm). I liked the X Division match. I felt Gail and Mickie tried to prove something (although how much can you prove in a seven-minute match with yet another run-in?). I liked that James Storm went over Kurt Angle. But, it felt like a $20 PPV. It's too bad that yet another TNA PPV is overshadowed by a lame finish. Did the finish make sense? You bet. But, boy, I'm not really jumping at the heels to check out Genesis, which will probably feature Jeff Hardy (who's really reliable).

Sure, Bobby Roode running away from a gimpy A.J. Styles in the final seconds fits in with his "I don't care that I'm pathetic, I'm the World Champion" vibe. But, a finish like that says to the viewer, "Y'all shouldn't order our PPVs. We're telling you to stay away."

The whole Jarrett-Jeff Hardy match reminded me of the Feast or Fired match, where the result you paid for ... wouldn't be given to you until Thursday night. Groovy. Fans still love Jeff Hardy, though.

If Taz and Tenay were talking about how Jeff Hardy vs. Jeff Jarrett was blowing up on Twitter, do you think anyone was tweeting about Roode-Styles? Sure they were. They were tweeting what a b.s. finish it was.

So, Pope's heel right? Then why in the match did they have Crimson and Morgan play the heel role and beat up on babyface Pope for the longest time? Weird. And, after the match, Pope hangs with Devon's kids. Gee, and Garett Bischoff just went over Gunner on Impact recently. Enough with the sons already.

Kid Kash vs. Austin Aries was a little silly, but X Division matches are (and should be) a staple of TNA's product. The question with TNA is usually not with their talent, but with with their booking.

Finally, I kind of digged it that James Storm tried to rally up the crowd, give a shout-out to his little birthday hat buddy boy. That kid was mostly bored throughout the night, though, along with the rest of the audience. Is it the crowd's fault? Is it TNA's fault? Well, you look back at TNA in 2006, and I seem to remember pretty lively crowds. Maybe they should pipe in noise for live PPV events, as well. Heck, bribe them beyond free admission if you have to. The Impact Zone is a dead zone.

Email is mckinley.torch@gmail.com


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