CALDWELL'S TAKE CORNER CUBE MONDAY: Clearing more misconceptions on steroid issues, WWE Smackdown analysis Jan 21, 2008 - 2:50:11 PM

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Updated throughout the day from the corner cubicle, Torch columnist James Caldwell's weekday blog focuses on hot topic current events and other items of interest from around wrestling.

Updated Monday, January 21

2:50 p.m. At the risk of painting music industry journalists with a very large broke stroke of obliviousness (because it's unfair when blanket opinions are attributed to all wrestling journalists as a whole), it seems to me that some people just don't get the steroid issue.

I'm not an expert by any means on the music industry, but you and I, who follow the wrestling business closely, know what the issue is from living through the death cycle in wrestling. So, I'll take an opinion piece on Yahoo Music as an example of why the picture is still fuzzy to the general public.

The music industry was rocked last week when New York state's federal investigation into Signature Pharmacy records revealed names of several famous music artists. There have been informed opinions on the significance of this story, but misconceptions continue to be fueled by the mainstream media.

The premise of the Yahoo article is that the government's accusations of steroid purchases by well-known celebrities must be false because Wyclef Jean isn't ripped to shreds and getting endorsement deals for fitness products. It could be as simple as Wyclef's name appearing on Signature Pharmacy records because he's buying for someone else. But, for the sake of argument, let's look at the real issue.

Apparently, the lessons from the Mitchell Report haven't been learned, where the story isn't about breaking home run records, but finding an edge in a particular profession. Just because a person isn't ripped doesn't mean he or she isn't using steroids. People can debate the specific health-ramifications forever, and the discussion is very important, but today's issue is athletes and celebrities gaining an edge through unfair, illegal, and potentially unsafe means if used in excess.

In wrestling, TNA is usually overlooked in wrestling's steroids game because WWE pushes larger-than-life athletes, who get the skeptical looks and questions. But, just because TNA has a roster of mid-sized wrestlers who won't win bodybuilding contests (pause for the make-believe Mr. Maple Leaf Muscle), doesn't exclude TNA from the conversation. The drug testing set to begin at today's TV taping will establish some baseline levels that may or may not reinforce my point, although TNA won't disclose the results publicly per their company policy.

The takeaway that we have maintained through countless stories written here on the Torch is that steroids is an enhancer for people of all sizes, shapes, and body types. It's about gaining a competitive edge.

Apparently without even realizing it, the Yahoo author hits home on the issue when he says Timbaland, who was on the Signature Pharmacy list, is now taking his shirt off with confidence in recent music videos. Something like that will make a strong impression with decision-makers in the industry. Whether or not Timbaland used steroids from an illegal source hasn't been proven yet. But, if he did, he found an edge through unfair, illegal, and potentially unsafe means. That's the issue. In music, in entertainment, in sports, and especially in wrestling.

***

11:15 a.m. It's been a few weeks since I've watched Smackdown. Actually, it's the first Smackdown show I've watched this year. So, it was interesting watching this last night on the DVR to catch up on what I missed. My first thought after watching the show is how great MVP and Ric Flair were in the VIP Lounge segment.

The VIP Lounge segment was great, in part because it didn't look rehearsed or scripted or force-fed. It was like two men were thinking off the top of their heads in reaction to each other's comments, building to a climax in their war of words. MVP with one line, Flair one-upped him, MVP one-upped him, and then Flair just chopped him and left.

For the past three or four years, Ric Flair's role on the mic has been very limited, in comparison to what we know he's capable of. The supposed reason was to allow younger wrestlers an opportunity to work on their promos and not be overshadowed by Flair. There's a hint of logic to that, but they took it too far by nearly eliminating Flair's promo time, instead of reaching a compromise of Flair interacting with a younger talent.

Flair didn't overshadow MVP in the Lounge segment; he enhanced his cocky heel character, even giving a little rub by saying that MVP reminds of him, but he'll never be him. And MVP with the classic line, "Nah, that's because I'm better than you." In practice, when WWE utilizes Flair in a give-and-take, rather than a give-and-disappear, storylines are enhanced by a significant margin. Now, I'm wondering how many wasted opportunities there were to enhance younger talent when WWE took a pessimistic view to using Flair with a mic in hand.

The other thing stood out to me was the announcing of Michael Cole and The Coach. I'm really disappointed in WWE's approach to this announce team. It's not the selection of Jonathan Coach that I'm even concerned about. I think he's a serviceable-to-good announcer. The problem is that a) he's not JBL and b) he's not challenging Cole.

Challenging Cole comes in two different ways. JBL challenged Cole to cut out his bad habits of superlatives and histrionics. When Cole slipped into his 1999ish bad form, JBL quickly pointed it out. There is none of that with Coach. It's like an echo in the room, with Coach repeating, rephrasing, and reinforcing what Cole says into his own words.

The other "challenge" element is that Coach isn't playing devil's advocate. JBL played the heel wrestling announcer perfectly, and it made for great TV commentary, even helping Cole improve as an announcer because he refined his arguments in support of the babyfaces - as the voice of the fans. Coach isn't being scripted for that role, leaving a huge void in how the stories are being told on the show.

The storylines are pretty basic, with Flair-MVP obviously being the bright spot. The one that's really disturbing is the direction of the Vickie Guerrero storyline. I'm still trying to give WWE the benefit of the doubt on this one, but Chavo's scripted line to Vickie early in the show made my blood boil in frustration (which apparently is the intended purpose, so WWE is doing its wrestling carny job of getting heat on Vickie and Chavo).

After apologizing to Vickie for his outburst last week, Chavo said: "I think I speak for the rest of the Guerreros when I say that, Vickie, you're right. You should be able to go on with the rest of your life, and you should be able to love again." There's only one thing missing from that: it should be OFF TV in Vickie's private life, not as part of a TV storyline. I still can't wrap my head around Vickie having to be part of this storyline.

Imagine you're a partner with a good-sized law firm. You die, and your salary, bonuses, stock options, etc. transfer to your wife, who is now widowed. Now, imagine there is no transfer of assets, and your widow must work for the law firm to earn a decent living without the income generated by you. That's what's happening here. Maybe I'm crazy, but it doesn't make any sense.

You could say WWE is still stung by the settlement to Martha Hart, but I don't buy that when a wrestling company with billions of dollars in assets and 95 percent monopolization of the American market can't transfer the downside guarantee of Eddie Guerrero's contract to Vickie and her family for x number of years. But, WWE operates in its own world where stockholders are oblivious and wrestlers are considered independent contractors, yet they would never be able to work a TNA PPV or an ROH show.

For more opinions and analysis, be sure to check out Jon Mezzera's Smackdown Hitlist from this week's show in the Specialist section. Mezzera does a great job of breaking down every TV episode during the week.

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