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Last night's planned episode of Larry King Live featuring WWE stars talking about WrestleMania and steroids was bumped from the air, but we at PWTorch.com are able to provide you with an exclusive transcript of what you missed...

LARRY KING: Tonight! WWE's head honcho Vincent K. McMahon along with some of his star wrestlers, including movie star John Cena, former boxing great Floyd Mayweather, and top '90s star Triple H. It's going to be a Big Show tonight. Join us as we talk WrestleMania!

(commercial break)

KING: First, I've been corrected. Triple H is not a top '90s star. He's also currently active and participating in WrestleMania's big fight later this month. This is at the Orange Bowl, right Vince?

John Cena [artist Grant Gould (c) PWTorch]

VINCE MCMAHON: It's Mr. McMahon to you, Larry. Yes, we have sold out the Orange Bowl. We expect to break all box office records for that stadium, all merchandise records, and we anticipate breaking the record for most buys for a WWE PPV extravaganza, also.

KING: Mr. Cena. You are in the big fight against Triple H and [looks down at paper] Randy Orton. I'm confused, which is it? Triple or Orton?

JOHN CENA: Mr. King, first of all, it's great to be here. I'd like to say that I am clean and always have been. Anyone who takes steroids should be shot. With a gun. In a public square. It's a disgrace that anyone would take any kind of short cut. When I speak to Make-a-Wish children, I tell them how bad drugs are and to stay away. Yes sir-eee, I do.

KING: I was going to talk about steroids later if we had time. First, though, are you fighting Triple H or Randy Orton? Or Triple H, is your real name Randy Orton? I'm confused. Clear that up.

TRIPLE H: I am the King of Kings, Mr. King. Randy Orton is another fellow who is not here. We are having a three-way.

KING: That was yesterday's show theme. I'm confused. [Looks off camera to a producer in a confused panic.]

MCMAHON: Larry, what we've done is set up a match where all three wrestlers are fighting at once. It's something we've done quite a bit in the past. There was confusion over who deserved the title shot against Orton, so the way things played out - and it's too complicated to get into here - Cena and Triple H were both deemed worthy of a title shot.

KING: But it's scripted, right?

MCMAHON: Well, uh, yeah. Larry, we've been pretty open about being "sports entertainment" for the last 20 years.

CENA: Our audience gets us. They know what we do out there is entertainment.

KING: But football games are entertainment, too. Are you saying football games are scripted?

TRIPLE H: No, we like to say "we're entertainment" as a soft euphemism for "fake." But we're not really "fake," either, because we do get hurt. John and I are both returning from muscle tears that kept us out of action for months.

CENA: I came back early, by the way. Way early.

KING: If it's fake, why not just continue to perform while injured?

CENA: Mr. King, what we do takes a ton of athletic ability. It's very strenuous on our bodies. We can't perform if we can't walk.

KING: So why does the audience watch if they know it's fake?

MCMAHON: We prefer the euphemism "entertainment." Sort of like you're an "entertainment talk show," rather than "fake, lazy journalism."

KING: Mr. Cena, you have starred in hit movies. You presented at the Oscars. Why did you decide to drop the nick-name "The Rock"? I thought that was more catchy than "John."

CENA: Mr. King, you have me confused with another sports entertainer who never took steroids and finds them despicable, Dwayne Johnson. He wrestled as "The Rock." He just presented an award at the Oscars, as a matter of fact.

KING: How was that? Were you intimidated by the crowd and the lights and the TV cameras? There was no room for a retake like in the movies.

CENA: Well, Mr. King, we're actually live in front of crowds with TV cameras every week on our TV show on Monday night, WWE Raw. But again, you're confusing me with Dwayne Johnson. He's no longer wrestling for WWE.

KING: Let's bring in our next guest, Floyd Mayweather, to talk about the big show.

[Big Show and Floyd Mayweather join McMahon, Triple H, and Cena at the desk.]

KING: Oh, who is this? Your bodyguard?

MCMAHON: That's The Big Show. He's Mr. Mayweather's opponent at WrestleMania.

KING: I thought WrestleMania was The Big Show?

TRIPLE H: It is a big show, but The Big Show is Paul Wight, the giant sitting here. He's fighting Floyd Mayweather on March 30 on pay-per-view.

KING: Mr. Mayweather, why did you change careers? I understand you were undefeated in boxing.

MAYWEATHER: I broke your nose last time, I'll break your jaw at WrestleMania.

KING: Uh, Big Show, you seem much bigger than Mayweather. Doesn't WWE have weight divisions? It seems like an easy win for you.

BIG SHOW: It will be an easy win for me. I'm going to squash him like a bug. The only reason he broke my nose was because I had my hands behind my back and was on my knees.

KING: Mr. Mayweather, is that true?

MAYWEATHER: I'm Money Mayweather, baby. I'm going to make Big Show choke on $20 million dollars, then I'll buy more stuff after I punch him in the gut and he regurgitates my money.

MCMAHON: Uh, Floyd, please stick to the script. Notwithstanding.

MAYWEATHER: I'm Money Mayweather. I'm going to flip WWE upside down and it'll become the Money Mayweather Entertainment.

KING: Mr. Mayweather, have you ever wrestled before?

MAYWEATHER: I broke your nose last time, I'll break your jaw next time. I'm Money Mayweather, baby.

KING: What about steroids? I understand this was a problem in the past with your organization.

CENA: Mr. King, I'm glad you asked that question. It was a problem in the past, I'm ashamed to admit. But that was before I came to WWE. Now it's not a problem. Everybody knows I don't condone steroid use. Mr. McMahon does not, either. That's why we have a comprehensive drug testing policy carried out in complete secrecy under the auspices of a drug testing company we pay a lot of money to do what they're told and with punishment doled out strictly by Mr. McMahon as he sees fit, which I promise you is with the health of his performers in mind from time to time.

KING: That sounds great. It's good to know you're looking out for the wrestlers, Mr. McMahon.

TRIPLE H: Nice glasses, Mr. King. Have you tried marketing them? Same with the suspenders. Do you have a ShopZone? You can make even more money by whoring yourself out on TV by pushing your merchandise constantly. If you wink at the camera, it's comes across as cute, not pathetic and greedy. Try it sometime.

MAYWEATHER: I'm Money Mayweather. I broke your nose last time, I'll break your jaw next time.

BIG SHOW: Can I leave now? This is kind of embarrassing.

KING: On Larry King Live Friday, join me and my guest Dr. Laura, who will explain why it's the fault of every women whose husband has ever cheated on her because they didn't give good enough...

MCMAHON: Whoa! Larry. We have standards. We will not be sitting here while you push smut like that for your show.

TRIPLE H: Suspenders... Hmmm. I wonder what those would look like in hot green?

CENA: I do not condone steroid use.

MAYWEATHER: I'm Money Mayweather, baby. I don't know who President Bush is, but I know Benjamin Franklin. I broke your nose last time...

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