By Pat McNeill, PWTorch columnist

Wake the pets and call the neighbors. It's time for our DGUSA internet pay-per-view preview column!

DISCLAIMER: Projections are made by myself and for myself with absolutely no assistance from Gabe Sapolsky or Sal Hamaoui. No one knows the contents of these projections, but I, in my divine and mystical way, will ascertain the finishes to these matches despite not being caught up on my Dragon Gate DVD's. Some of our departing contestants will receive the Perfect Tortilla Pan. The Perfect Tortilla Pan is great for taco bowls, salads, dips and more – your family will love the Perfect Tortilla. Remember, this is only an exhibition. This is not a competition. Please, please, no wagering. This lineup is based on the best available information as of this writing.

For those of you who willfully ignore anything that isn't WWE or TNA, Dragon Gate USA is the Cirque du Soleil of professional wrestling. DGUSA booker Gabe Sapolsky manages to find diamonds in the rough that is independent wrestling. You're going to see some incredible athleticism. But it is the Japanese style of main event wrestling, not the WWE style. And yes, some of us here at PWTorch have given DGUSA flak over its failure to properly market its top wrestlers. But when DGUSA does get someone with superstar potential, that wrestler usually gets snapped up by a company that pays better.

Everyone at DGUSA is probably excited to be talking about wrestling this weekend, rather than the extended offline urinating contest between DGUSA and Ring of Honor. Neither promotion should be calling attention to the awful financial state of America's mid-major wrestling promotions.

Before we get to our picks, let's do today's Wrestling History Lesson. Let's take a look at some of the stars of tonight's show. From the DGUSA Open The Ultimate Gate 2012 show, here's A.R. Fox in action against Rich Swann.



And, as your free gift for viewing this column, let's take you back to November 27, 2010. If you're not familiar with Dragon Gate USA Champion Johnny Gargano, here he is taking on Matt Cross at AAW's "Windy City Classic VI."



Enough of that. Now on with the projections!

Arik Cannon & Pinkie Sanchez will beat up a tag team to be named later. Also, CZW Champion Masada will probably win a match.

Jon Davis vs. Jake Manning: Let's see. DGUSA and Evolve have been pushing the heck out of NWA World Tag Team Champion Jon Davis, while Jake Manning is still...the Manscout. Projection? Davis hits Manning with the Three Seconds Around The World for the victory.

Super Smash Brothers vs. The Scene: The Smash Brothers are making a much anticipated debut. And once you've seen The Scene, you've seen them. Projection? The Smashes hits the Fatality on Scott Reed for the victory.

Rich Swann vs. Chuck Taylor: A big grudge match between former members of Ronin. But as we know, only one of these two men is headlining the 3rd Anniversary show. Projection? Swann puts the Kentucky Gentleman away with a 450 splash.

YAMATO vs. Ricochet: The former DGUSA champ returns to face...the guy who's teaming with Rich Swann in Sunday night's main event. Projection? Ricochet puts Yamato down with The Sky Is Falling or Chocolate Rain or whatever he's calling that move now.

CIMA & AR Fox vs. El Generico & Samuray Del Sol: Again, three of these wrestlers have featured bouts on the 3rd Anniversary Show. One of them does not. Projection? Mr. Fox ends up pinning Del Sol with the Lo Mein Pain.

Johnny Gargano vs. Akira Tozawa (Dragon Gate USA Title): Is Johnny Gargano on his way to WWE? I don't know, but I suspect he isn't. It would be a no-brainer for either TNA or Ring of Honor to sign him, but we're not even sure whether he's actually going to be a free agent. Has Gargano been champion for too long? Not really. Projection? Gargano forces Tozawa to tap to the Garga-No-Escape and keeps the belt in a minor upset.

Aftermath: On Sunday night in Chicago ("Enter The Dragon - 3rd Anniversay"), let's go with Masada over Jake Manning, Samuray Del Sol over Shane Hollister, The Scene over Zero Gravity, Super Smash Brothers to beat Cannon & Sanchez, Yamato over Jon Davis, Chuck Taylor over Gargano in a screwy finish, Tozawa over El Generico and CIMA & AR Fox beating World-1 to win the DGUSA Tag Team Titles.

***
Pat McNeill of Richmond, Va. has been a Torch columnist since February 2001. He'd like to wish Meghan & Sam a happy fifth wedding anniversary.

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