AUGUST 8, 2017
TORONTO, ONT. AT AIR CANADA CENTRE
By Joey Galizia (@RamJam89), PWTORCH SPECIALIST
“A FAMILIAR FOE”
For the fourth time in what seems like a never-ending arc, Randy Orton will go one-on-one with the new great one, the Maharaja Jinder Mahal. Tonight’s match will be a non-title affair so I wonder if all that losing that the Viper has been keen on doing will swing momentum in his favor. However, the other question is whether both men’s Summerslam opponents will have any cameos in this confrontation. Last week Rusev claimed that no one in the WWE could defeat him, which brought out Randy for a challenge. (Oh Joy.)
The man the WWE champion has to worry about is the red hot Shinsuke Nakamura, who shocked the wrestling universe when he defeated John Cena as clean as a whistle after dropping the Cenation leader on his neck and annihilating him with a Kinshasa. With all four scheduled for tonight’s episode, I wonder if we’ll get a…TAG TEAM MAIN EVENT PLAYA PLAYA.
“FOR YOUR EYEZ ONLY”
If you did watch last week’s epic main event than you would have seen the praise that Cena gave to Shinsuke after their matchup. You may NOT have seen what happened afterwards considering that the WWE decided to run an angle after the show on a Network Exclusive. Baron Corbin ran down to the ring to lay another beating on Nak but Cena decided that Baron needed some attitude adjusting. This has obviously aimed the Lone Wolf’s attention entirely on Cena at the moment, but why run this angle only on the network? I didn’t even here mention of the run-in on 205 Live after. (Which I do weekly review/reports of which you should totally read because BRANDING.) How will Corbin respond? Well, probably by signaling the End of Days.
“STATEN ISLAND REPRESENT”
Nothing’s more exciting than non-title matchups AM I RIGHT?!?!!? Naomi will get to sink her teeth into the first ever Ms. Money in the Bank as they square off tonight-in Toronto. While there doesn’t seem to be a chance in hell for Carmella to defeat the Glow Queen, it does give the #1 contender Natalya Neidhart and opportunity to scout out the champ for their big fight in Brooklyn. It also should be noted that a certain chinless peasant’s suspension might be concluding soon, and wouldn’t it be just JOLLY if he decided to interfere in tonight’s conflict?
As for the rest of the women’s division? Lana has taken it upon herself to step toe-to-toe with the real Queen of SD Live, Charlotte. It seems just bizarre to me that with Summerslam only two weeks away that young Flair wouldn’t be on the card. Hopefully there’s a way to add her into the mayhem. Becky Lynch on the other hand seems destined to have the 20th off…unless of course her threats towards UFC’s Cyborg play out.
“GOLDEN FLOWER BOY”
-After another controversial finish, Kevin Owens and A.J. Styles will do battle ONE MORE TIME at Summerslam for the United States Championship. And just to make sure that there won’t be any more shenanigans, Shane McMahon will be the special guest referee. As for tonight, Shane will update both competitors on the contest, whatever that means.
-Tyler Breeze is still looking for his partner in crime, and what’s worse is he is hallucinating some David Lynch esque scenarios of where he could be. With the list of suspects only growing smaller, eventually the attackers that have caused Breezango so much anguish will reveal themselves. That is…unless, they lack any SANITY. (I’m as subtle as a car wreck.)
-Chad Gable continues to be a worthy opponent for Tuesday nights but he just can’t seem to notch a victory. That hasn’t stopped the WWE Universe from being heavy in his corner though. More than his old counterpart that is.
-Sami Zayn maybe fighting the good fight for Syria, but he wasn’t able to defeat the Artiste Aiden English last week. The inconsistencies by the Likeable One could severely derail any push he would get. Mike and Maria aren’t too unhappy with his results though.
-Two weeks ago the Usos laid a vicious beating on the new tag team champions. Last week, they starting stealing their catch phrases and debuted a DOPE new theme song. Will the Unicorn Train be back to respond tonight? WHO…WHO…WHOOOO….you bet.
-Tye Dillinger still gets 10 chants and they still keep him off T.V. Sometimes I really hate wrestling.
-205 Live will have the friendly competition between Rich Swann and T.J. Perkins taken to the next level as the “buddies” take each other on in a singles matchup.
That’s the show. You interested?
NOW CHECK OUT LAST WEEK’S COLUMN: SMACKDOWN PRIMER 8/1: Shinsuke Nakamura vs. John Cena, A.J. Styles vs. Kevin Owens for U.S. Title, Usos-New Day, Breezango