TV REPORTS CALDWELL'S WWE RAW REPORT 5/14: Ongoing virtual time coverage of live show
May 14, 2007 - 10:10:00 PM
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By James Caldwell, PWTorch columnist
WWE Raw Live Report
May 14 in Hampton, Va.
We open live in the arena with no pyro and John Cena's music. Monster pop. Kids are screaming. Girls are crying. Cena doesn't have his WWE Title belt since Great Khali stole it at the end of Raw last week. Music stopped and the usual mixture of boos and cheers filled the arena. Cena quietly opened his promo by saying he's the WWE champion, but he doesn't have his title belt. Boos for Khali as the current possessor of the belt. Cena got choked up talking about Khali leaving with his title belt, knocked out in a pool of his own blood. He's embarrassed and humiliated. Not the first time, though, since there's always a group of fans telling him he sucks. Cena said it doesn't matter what some people think about him; he always has a great amount of respect for the title and WWE. Cena's been in the ring with giants and super heavyweights and the baddest men on the planet, but Khali's not even human. He can hit him with his best shot, but Khali doesn't even move. Never pinned, he claimed. Um...Taker pinned him. Never submitted and barely been off his feet. Cena said he saw firsthand that Khali can do whatever he wants to whomever he wants. He said his peeps are telling him that Judgment Day is a bad idea. Won't be much of a match (yup), and it will be his execution. "I may have been embarrassed, but I'm here to tell them they're wrong," he said. Cena said he can be a one-man wrecking crew if he's in the right frame of mind. Khali signed up for the fight of his life and he's not talking about Judgment Day, because Khali has something Cena owns. He called out Khali, who appeared backstage holding the title. Khali's new translator said Khali has something he wants to say, and Khali spoke in his language. The translator said no one has ever had the impact Khali has had and they showed a video package on Khali's destruction the past few weeks. The translator told us that Khali will be new WWE champion at Judgment Day. Khali then rubbed the belt and told Cena that if he wants some, come get some. Cena surveyed the audience, then flipped his hat off and marched up the entrance stage to the backstage area.
They cut backstage where Cena tried to attack Khali, but Khali knocked him down and threw a trashcan into his face. Khali tossed him into a stack of loose pipes, then gave him the two-hand chokebomb onto a machine of some sort. Khali choked out Cena against a garage wall, then left him KO'ed on the floor. Cena coughed it out, then we cut to a break.
Opening analysis: Cena had the preacher sermon working tonight. No penis jokes. No potty humor. Just a straight promo building up Khali as a monster. I don't know if WWE can do anything to get anyone excited to see this match, but Cena did his darndest. Solid promo. We'll see where the choke-out leads as the show goes on.
They came back and recapped the ending to the previous segment. Ross said Cena is being tended to by EMTs. He promised an update on Cena's condition later in the night.
1 -- JEFF HARDY (w/Matt Hardy) vs. MURDOCH (w/Cade)
They had a brief stand-off to a mild applause in the opening minute. Cade & Murdoch are still doing the respect angle. Jeff knocked Murdoch off the apron to the floor, then hit a plancha. He followed up in the corner with right hand blows before missing with a slingshot dropkick. Jeff came back with the Twist of Phate, but then missed with the top rope Swanton Bomb when Murdoch got his knees up. Murdoch made a quick cover, but Jeff kicked out. Suddenly, Jeff went to the inside cradle hooked Murdoch's shoulder to the mat to score the pin. After the match, Jeff favored his ankle. Murdoch and Cade were beside themselves, but Murdoch helped Jeff to his feet. Everyone shook hands, then the Hardy Boys music hit and the heels left the ring.
WINNER: Jeff Hardy in 4:00. Solid action. The sportsmanship angle is intriguing because you don't know when Cade & Murdoch are going to deliver the beating. No plug for a Judgment Day tag title match, though. (*)
Ross talked about Edge's title victory on Smackdown, then plugged his final Raw appearance.
Disturbing Snitsky video package. Ross and Lawler shook their heads ringside and speculated on whether Snitsky is coming to Raw. They aired a video package on Lashley taking out Coach last week.
Backstage, The Coach was scared at the thought of facing Lashley tonight. Shane McMahon talked him up, then the camera pulled back to show Coach wearing the official Judgment Day t-shirt, a sure sign of a jobber. Umaga grunted, then Vince McMahon walked in with a purple jacket and purple doo-rag. Looking more and more like Jesse Ventura every week. Shane gave Coach a pep-talk, then told him they have his back. Coach left, then Shane and Vince stared down Umaga, who kept breathing heavily. Umaga left, then Vince showed off his doo-rag and Shane patted him on the shoulder before leaving. Vince admired his attire.
Slam of the Week is sponsored by the Spider-man 3 video game. Ah, irony.
2 -- SANTINO MARELLA vs. CHRIS MASTERS -- Intercontinental Title match
Marella is now residing in New Jersey. Masters received his full intro this week, and Lawler talked about Marella not paying his dues yet. Masters worked on Marella's back early on. Lawler rambled about long-lost relatives, crooks, and con artists coming out of the woodwork looking for hand-offs from Marella. Masters cut off Marella's comeback, then called for the Masterlock. Marella slipped out, though, and they went through a convoluted roll-up spot before Marella finally rolled him up for the win. After the match, Masters was upset, so he slapped on the Masterlock. The ref finally forced Masters to break the hold, then Marella collapsed to the mat as the fans expressed sympathy for him.
WINNER: Marella in 3:00 to retain the IC Title. And the Marella-Masters program continues. Marella is starting to get over, but that ship has already sunk on Masters. Just a mid-card feud for a mid-card title. (3/4*)
They aired a video package with wrestlers including C.M. Punk, Shawn Michaels, Triple H, Carlito, Candice Michelle, John Cena, JBL, Torrie Wilson, and Ashley discussing who they would put on the Condemned island in the movie. Hunter buried Miz. Candice said she would like to see if she could flirt her way to the victory. Cena, Ashley, and Kennedy said Vince McMahon is the evil TV producer.
Melina came out and did her entrance on the announce table. Ross tried to calm Lawler down. She then joined them on commentary. Victoria was already in the ring, sporting a baseball cap. No entrance and the classic Ultimate Warrior portrait look. We know who's going over here.
3 -- CANDICE MICHELLE vs. VICTORIA
Candice pulled Victoria's cap over her eyes then landed a snapmare takeover. She rolled Victoria over and hooked the tights for a nearfall. Melina acknowledged improvements from Candice, but said she's still not championship material. Victoria put Candice in a modified bow and arrow, then Candice kicked her way out of the match. Melina said Candice's only talent is taking off her clothes. Candice did the go-daddy dance, then dropped an elbow for a nearfall. Candice then came up with a spinning head scissors after a few revolutions. The finish came when Candice ducked a clothesline and hit a spin kick right in the face. She made the cover for the win. After the match, Candice did the belt-around-the-waist motion in Melina's face and Melina said she can see that Candice is fat.
WINNER: Candice in 3:00. A few surprising spots from Candice, but it still has that feeling of forced action. Improvement, yes. But, I think most viewers would rather see the Melina vs. Mickie feud. (1/2*)
Edge came out to a huge pyro entrance as Ross talked about his World Hvt. Title victory on Smackdown. His strobe light entrance lasted for...ever...and Ross and Lawler had to fill time talking about Richard Nixon. His music finally stopped and Edge took off the sunglasses to look at the chorus of boos and cheers. Edge gave us some video footage from Raw when he pinned Mr. Kennedy to capture the MITB briefcase before pinning Undertaker on Smackdown to capture the World Title. Although Edge technically did not win the MITB match at WrestleMania this year, this could be planting seeds for streak vs. streak at WM 24.
After footage from Smackdown aired, Edge held the title belt high in the air so everyone could get a good look. He said he thought about leaving Raw with one last great Edge match, but the fans don't deserve it and Khali has already left the building. Pause for rimshot. He then said he needs to be ready for when he defends the title against Batista at Judgment Day. Edge said he's not worried about Batista, though, because he beat Taker in three seconds, whereas Batist couldn't get it done in three months. Edge signed off, then his music hit. Suddenly, Shawn Michaels's music hit and HBK slowly walked out on stage. He was sporting a ball cap. Michaels told Edge to leave us with a lasting impression by just leaving. Edge told him to shut up, then he cut a promo and asked HBK to accept a match. Edge said he would enjoy beating up Michaels just as much as he enjoyed beating up Taker. Michaels didn't even suggest a match, so he just mouthed "You got it" and walked back up the entrance ramp. Ross wondered if Edge was out manipulated into accepting a match that had no offer.
Backstage, Todd Grisham interviewed Bobby Lashley. He wanted some thoughts. Suddenly, Shane McMahon interrupted and reminded Lashley that he would forfeit his title shot if he touched any of the McMahons or Umaga. Shane then took the mic and let his finger dance around Lashley's face to tease him. Shane said they would be ringside for Lashley's match against Coach. He feigned a kiss, which Lashley didn't react to, and left. Odd.
Vince & Shane & Umaga walked out for Coach's match. Vince's hair has grown back on the sides. Coach then walked out and pumped himself up. Lashley came out last and scared everyone with his pyro.
4 -- BOBBY LASHLEY vs. THE COACH (w/Vince McMahon, Shane McMahon, and Umaga)
Coach started things off with a slap, which Lashley shook off before landing hard forearm blows to the back of the head. Lashley crunched Coach's back with a forward falling torture rack slam, then he speared Coach for the pin.
After the match, Shane and Umaga jumped Lashley. He tossed Shane out of the ring, but Umaga cut him off with a hard clothesline. Umaga put Lashley to a seated position, then he warmed up the train for the charging rear splash, but Lashley moved. Lashley then speared Umaga as Vince stood on the ring apron. Vince slowly jumped down to his feet and Lashley gave chase. Out of nowhere, Shane saved Vince from certain peril with a hardcore clothesline on the floor. Vince scampered up the entrance ramp and left, then Lashley and Shane got up. They stared at each other, then Shane ran through the stands through the back. Lashley chased him backstage, but he pulled a Potiphar's wife and only got Shane's coat. Shane then ran to an awaiting limo and jumped on top of the limo into the sunroof. That Shane is like a cat. He disappeared, the limo sped off, and then Lashley turned around to find a belt shot to the face from Vince. Lashley collapsed to the ground, then Vince stared down at him before leaving.
WINNER: Lashley in 2:00. Pretty exciting post-match and chase scene. Umaga continues to be a secondary player, though. They stacked the deck against Lashley even more, but, again, I just don't see what they can do with this feud to get people any more excited or interested in spending $40 for the PPV on Sunday. (n/a)
They came back and recapped the end of the previous match before the McMahons led Lashley on a chase through the building to the backstage area.
Carlito came to the ring for a match against Val Venis, then they showed Carlito's promo from last week where he dumped Torrie Wilson. Lawler told us Carlito vs. Ric Flair has been added to the PPV.
5 -- CARLITO vs. VAL VENIS
Venis worked on Carlito's midsection with knee smashes before Carlito dumped him to the outside and screamed at the ref. The fans chanted for Flair two minutes into the match. Venis ducked a corner clothesline at 3:00, then Carlito went for a roll up, but it was good for a nearfall only. Venis went on the offensive with clotheslines and a neckbreaker, but Carlito kicked out. Venis then hit a single arm take down and went up top for the Money Shot, but Carlito rolled away. Venis hopped down to his feet and Carlito slammed him into the bottom turnbuckle. Carlito with the backcracker for the win.
WINNER: Carlito in 4:00. They found Venis in Heat perjury, then gave him as much, if not more offense than Carlito. Really gets you excited about the Carlito character. No crowd heat. (1/2*)
After the match, Ric Flair ran to the ring in a suit and chased Carlito out of the ring. Carlito bailed through the stands to the back, as Flair begged Carlito to come back and get some. Ross said it's Flair country in Virginia, and it would be Flair county in St. Louis on Sunday.
Backstage, Shawn Michaels stretched it out, then Randy Orton interrupted. Orton wished Michaels good luck against Edge and said he can't wait to see Michaels tear up his former partner. Michaels asked Orton to get to the point, then Orton flat out stated that he could beat Michaels. Michaels paused and said, "Well, that isn't the first time someone's said that!" Next thing you know, they set up a singles match for Judgment Day.
They showed a sneak peek of Timbaland's new music video featuring the divas. They "utilized" the Sin City animation theme. World premiere of "Throw it on me" is next week.
Ringside, Ross and Lawler discussed John Cena's physical recovery. Ross said Cena is more determined than ever to give Khali his first loss at Judgment Day. Again, Taker already beat him. Anyways, we saw video footage of Khali dismantling Cena in the opening segment. Ross and Lawler broke down the PPV line-up for Sunday.
Backstage, they showed Shawn Michaels walking past people reading from scripts and pretending to be talking to each other.
Edge came out sporting the new title belt around his waist. Looks like they slapped a post-it note with Edge's name on the title belt. Edge stood in the ring, then Shawn Michaels's music hit. He came out sporting the ball cap again. Ross and Lawler discussed Michaels's injuries from last week, then Lawler explained that Edge is going to focus on the injured areas. Ross and Lawler are particularly chippy with each other tonight.
6 -- World Hvt. champion EDGE vs. SHAWN MICHAELS -- non-title match
Edge landed knock-down right hand blows in the opening minute, working on the area affected by a concussion. Michaels telegraphed a back body drop and Edge kicked him in the head. Edge tried to follow with a clothesline near the ropes, but Michaels side stepped him and Edge spilled to the outside. Michaels then ran off the apron with a Thesz press and landed right hand blows. They cut to a break.
Back from the break, Michaels was face-down on the mat not showing any signs of movement. They showed a clip from during the break when Edge snapped Michaels's head off the top rope. The referee reprimanded Edge, then demanded a clean match. Michaels slowly reached his feet and Edge landed a headbutt. He followed with a kick to the head and Michaels refused to end the match. Michaels drooled as he reached his feet and Edge landed another right hand blow. Edge slapped on a reverse chin lock and Michaels fought to his feet before accepting a big boot to the face. Edge with a cover, but good for a nearfall only. At 11:00, Edge delivered a neckbreaker and made a cover for another nearfall.
[Q9 -- over-run]
Edge applied another reverse chinlock and Michaels slumped down on the mat. He didn't give up, though, and fought back to his feet again. Michaels yanked on Edge's trunks and pulled them down slightly revealing part of Edge's thong. Edge landed a right hand blow, then adjusted his wardrobe and went up top. Michaels crotched him, but Edge shoved him off the turnbuckles to the mat. Edge then went for a flying cross body splash, but Michaels intentionally collapsed to the mat and Edge missed. Both men recovered to their feet and went into a standing exchange of punches and chops. Michaels with a flying forearm and the kip up into an atomic drop and scoop slam. Michaels went to the corner for an elbow drop and connected. The fans came to their feet as Michaels tuned up the band at 15:00. Edge got up, then walked into Sweet Chin Music. Edge did the tree falling in the woods and Michaels fell on top of Edge to cover him for the win.
WINNER: Shawn Michaels in 16:00. Great final five minutes. Good story, using the injury angle from last week to set up this week's main event. Not exactly the start Edge needed as the new champion, but he's such a convincing talker that he can get his heat back on Smackdown. (***)
After the match, Randy Orton hit the ring and jumped Michaels. They rolled around the ring exchanging right hand blows, then Orton dropped HBK with a kick to the groin. Orton kicked Michaels in the head, then Michaels fell face-first onto the mat. Orton stared down at Michaels's fallen body, and they stayed with the camera shot for a while before Ross narrated a replay of Orton jumping Michaels. They went back live where Orton was standing over Michaels. Fade to Law and Order.
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