TV REPORTS PARKS' WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 7/10: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage of the show, including Jericho vs. Mysterio for the I.C. Title
Jul 10, 2009 - 9:00:36 PM
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by Greg Parks, PWTorch.com Contributor
WWE Smackdown review
July 10, 2009
Taped 7/1/09 in Bakersfield, Calif.
Aired on MyNetwork TV
-Jim Ross led off the show plugging the Jericho vs. Mysterio main event, as the camera panned the crowd.
-Jeff Hardy came out for a match. He wore an eye patch....like a pirate! He’s apparently selling his “eye injury” from last week as legit. He got the mic and said that tragedy struck during his tag match last week, then showed the footage of what happened. Hardy said he was in extreme pain, but what hurt him the most, his partner, C.M Punk, never came to find him to see if he’s OK. He accused Punk of thinking Jeff’s eye injury was faked. He said unlike Punk, he doesn’t fake injuries, kick referees or forfeit matches. He said his eye injury was as serious as Punk’s, then took off the patch and opened his eye wide to show he was faking.
1- JEFF HARDY vs. KANE
Kane got too aggressive and Jeff low-bridged him. He then plancha’d onto Kane on the outside. Back in the ring, a clothesline didn’t budge the Big Red Machine, who then caught Hardy with an uppercut as the colorful enigma was coming off the ropes. Loud “Hardy, Hardy” chants. Twist of Fate was blocked and Kante draped Hardy across the top rope and followed it up with a boot to the face. Hardy fell to the outside as they went to break.
Kane still held the advantage out of break and hit Hardy with a low dropkick for two. He put Hardy in a rear waist-lock on the mat in an attempt to keep him grounded. Jeff worked out with a jaw-breaker, then a dropkick to the knee. Dropkick to the mid-section (I guess- always looks like he hits the groin to me), but then Kane picked Jeff up in a GTS-like move where he put the knee to the mid-section instead. With Jeff shoved gut-first under the bottom rope and into the steel post, Kane dropkicked him right into it. Kane continued to work the abdomen area of Hardy. Back-breaker got two. Kane put a stop to Hardy’s comeback (which included a weak mule kick) with a sidewalk slam. Knae to the top, but that was unsuccessful for him. Corner dropkick by Hardy- dropkicks aplenty in this one. Hardy went to the top and we got a major edit (Kane was near the buckle....then he was far away) as he jumped into a chokeslam. Then he hit a Whisper in the Wind on the other side of the ring, for two. Twist of Fate by Jeff, who then went to the top rope. C.M. Punk’s music played and he walked out to the top of the stage and looked at Hardy with one eye closed. That distracted Hardy enough for Kane to chokeslam him off the top for the win. Punk smiled at Hardy getting pinned.
WINNER: Kane, at 13:08. Well, if you like dropkicks, this was right up your alley. Kane matches don’t really excite me anymore, even with Hardy in the ring.
-Another plug for Jericho vs. Rey tonight.
-Another edition of Cryme Tyme’s Word Up aired. Today’s word: Bromance. Eve told everyone what it meant, but I’m sure this word isn’t new to most people. They talked about famous bromances, including Fred & Barney, Leo DiCaprio & Zach Efron and The Hart Dynasty. Cryme Tyme made fun of them, and Eve asked if CT was a bromance. They said no- they’re a brotherhood. Then Jesse interrupted again. He said he was having a party in his room and Eve acted interested, then locked him behind a cage backstage.
-Teddy Long and John Morrison reminisced about their singing of Michael Jackson songs last week. Morrison said he challenged the winner of Punk vs. Hardy at Night of Champions and Long said he was taking it under consideration. The Friday Night Delight has a match later on with Dolph Ziggler. Ziggler then came out of a closet behind them (that had been making noise during Long and Morrison’s talk) all disheveled acting. Morrison made a joke about him coming out of the closet, then Maria walked out of the same closet and told Dolph good luck. Poor Maria- first she gets to portray an idiot and then when she’s not lost in the shuffle, her gimmick is dating a wrestler (Santino or Ziggler).
2- DOLPH ZIGGLER vs. JOHN MORRISON
They started off with some mat wrestling as JR once again pimped Ziggler’s amateur credentials. Ziggler took over with a forearm across the face and shouted that Morrison wishes he looked like him. Spinning cross-body over the top by Morrison onto Ziggler, who then choked Ziggler across the top rope. Ziggler again went after Morrison, putting his head on the outside of the ring as Morrison lay on the mat, and knee-lifting the head. Ziggler then continued his assault inside the ring. After a series of elbowdrops, Ziggler locked in a reverse chin-lock. Belly-to-back suplex by Dolph for two. Full nelson applied by the man whose theme song claims he is “perfection.” A bit of a Pele kick by Morrison (called such by Grisham) and the two traded rights. High leg kick then a running knee smash to the face by the Shaman of Sexy. Almost a reverse slam by Ziggler that sent Morrison to the mat on his stomach. Missile dropkick off the top by Morrison for two. A series of counters ended with Ziggler rolling up Morrison with the tights (using both hands!) for the three.
WINNER: Ziggler, at 6:06. I think we need a six-month moratorium on heels winning by using the tights.
-In the main event, Rey Mysterio defends his Intercontinental Championship against Chris Jericho.
-JR and Grisham sent it to a video package of R-Truth. Or, as he said introduced himself to the camera, Pretty Ricky. This was outside the arena in Smackdown and Truth tried to get backstage by pretending to be this “Pretty Ricky” person. He even talked to some old lady who asked if he had heard of R-Truth, and Truth said he hadn’t. I can’t tell if he’s playing a trick on the fans or the actual security people who ended up kicking him out of the arena. Seems a little too close to how “Bruno” was filmed to be coincidence.
3- MELINA & EVE TORRES vs. LAYLA & MICHELLE MCCOOL
Eve and Layla started things off. Eve got a shoulderblock and a dropkick (where only one foot connected) for two. Layla tried a cross-body but Eve caught her and slammed her. Layla was sitting on the apron recovering and Eve dropkicked her to the mat in a nasty looking spill. Layla appeared OK and was back in the ring distracting the ref, allowing McCool to kick Eve right in the face. McCool tagged in and got two. She locked Eve in a head-scissors. Eve escaped and then slammed Michelle’s face off the canvas. Both ladies struggled to get to their respective corners, but both did. Melina had her way with Layla. She took Layla by the hair and sent her to the mat as well. Michelle taunted Eve from across the ring and Eve got involved, distracting the ref and allowing McCool to kick Melina in the back as she was attempting her finisher. Layla picked Melina up and put her on her shoulders. Luckily, we didn’t see what that was going to turn into as Michelle again got involved and Layla ran into her on the apron, with Melina rolling her up for the win.
WINNERS: Melina & Eve, at 4:33.
After the match, McCool went right back after Melina and the two brawled to ringside where McCool was clotheslined over the barricade. McCool was able to high-tail it up the ramp as the ref held Melina back.
-The announcers plugged Punk vs. Khali, which is next.
-Jeff Hardy was at the commentary table for the next match. C.M. Punk came out for his match with Khali and got the mic. He said Hardy had a lot of nerve faking an eye injury, leaving him to fend for himself during the tag match last week. Punk said Hardy mocked him by coming out with an eye patch. He showed Hardy a small bottle that he said had to be applied to his eye three times a day and could only be obtained with a doctor’s prescription. He made a crack about Hardy being familiar with prescription medicine and said unlike Jeff, that’s the only foreign substance he’s willing to put in his body. Punk said Hardy needs to lead a clean lifestyle like him. Punk said the number of times he’s been suspended is zero, the number of strikes he has against him is zero and the number of trips he’s take to rehab is zero. He said Hardy’s chances of beating him at Night of Champions is zero. It has become personal.
4- C.M. PUNK vs. THE GREAT KHALI
Punk, predictably kicked away at Khali, but didn’t have much success in doing so. Khali slapped Punk across the chest a la Big Show. He missed a legdrop and Punk went to the kicking well once again. Springboard clothesline took Khali down like a giant oak tree. Running knee to Khali in the corner, but couldn’t bulldog him. Khali got ready to put Punk away after a back elbow, then went for the tree slam. Punjabi Plunge put Punk down and Kane came out with a chair and with his entrance music. That got Khali’s attention. He got onto the apron as Punk was outside the ring. Ranjin Singh threw a chair to Khali and both men wielded the steel weapons in the ring. Kane finally swung and hit Khali in the shoulder. He let out a primal scream and knocked Kane’s chair out of his hand with his own fist. Kane tried to back off, but he got hit in the shoulder as well, getting sent to the outside.
WINNER: No Contest, at about 2:30. Everytime they don’t bother to give a winner, it makes the results of the matches seem less important.
5- CRYME TYME vs. THE HART DYNASTY
Apparently, the Hart Dynasty demanded this re-match. JTG was all over Tyson Kidd to start. He elbowed David Hart Smith off the apron then back-dropped Kidd over the top rope. Natalya’s interference led to Kidd knocking JTG into the commentary table. Smith tagged in and used his brute power on one-half of Cryme Tyme. JTG got back in the ring behind Smith’s back and tagged Shad. Suplex sent Smith to the mat, but things began to break down. As they did, the Hart Dynasty pulled off the win with the Hi-Low (shades of Cade & Murdoch!).
WINNERS: Hart Dynasty, at 2:54. Too short to really show off the Harts’ abilities they showed in ECW.
-Up next, Chris Jericho gets his re-match for the I.C. Title against Rey Mysterio.
-The Raw Rebound aired.
-Chris Jericho came out for the main event and grabbed the stick. He opened by saying he’s the best in the world at what he does. He also said he’s not satisfied being one-half of the Unified Tag Champions. He recited his credentials and said he’d be 10-time Intercontinental Champion after the upcoming match. He said the sweetest of all would come at the expense of the recalcitrant (among other, hard-to-spell things he said) Rey Mysterio. Their match is next. Seriously this time.
6- CHRIS JERICHO vs. REY MYSTERIO- INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Jericho relished in the jeers after shoulderblocking Rey down. Jericho threw Mysterio under the bottom rope and of course Rey rolled at the right time and ended up on his feet. Why do heels keep doing that move? And why does JR keep acting amazed every time he sees it, as if it’s the first time? Rey was back-dropped to the apron where Jericho threw him into the ring post. They went to a break 2:30 into the match.
The show returned with Jericho dropkicking Rey out of the ring as Mysterio was lying on the mat. Mysterio recovered enough to hit an enziguri, but Jericho landed a back-breaker (“Atlantis-like Torture Rack,” according to JR) in retaliation before Rey could hit his 619. Jericho verbally taunted Rey and choked him in the middle rope. Springboard cross-body by Rey, then a bulldog for two. Jericho caught Rey on a hurricanrana attempt and turned it into a powerbomb for a near-fall. Jericho locked on the Walls (more of a Boston Crab though) but Rey was relatively close to the ropes. Instead Rey worked out of it the hard way and the two traded pinfall attempts. Mysterio missed the 619 and landed hard on the outside as a result. With just under 11:00 gone in the match, they went to the final break of the show.
Jericho had Rey in a submission move on the mat while also taunting him. Irish whip into the buckle, to which Jericho followed it up with a clothesline. Fans got behind Rey, chanting “619, 619.” That brought Mysterio back, but it ended quickly with another hard Irish whip. Spinning Muscle Buster by Jericho for two. He again stretched out the arms of Rey, working the neck and back as well. Rey kicked at the thighs of Jericho to break out. His springboard moonsault resulted in Jericho catching him and slamming him into the corner. He missed a charge though and went shoulder-first into the post. Rey broke out his offense at this point, even hitting a springboard splash for two. Jericho managed to flip Rey over his head in a powerbomb-like move that resulted in Rey going face-first into the mat. Grisham said “if Jericho was in the NFL, he’d be the league leader in interceptions.” Todd has improved on commentary, but he still comes up with some odd analogies sometimes. Rey was put in the Walls again, this time in the middle of the ring. But after about a minute, he was able to reach the ropes. Jericho tried to baseball slide Rey to take his feet out from under him. Springboard moonsault on the outside left both men down. Back in, Rey went for another springboard but Jericho met him in mid-air for a code-breaker. But it took to long for him to go for the pin, and Rey kicked out. He yelled at Rey to stay down and kicked him in the ribs. Jericho go overzealous and Rey was able to hit the 619, then his splash for the win.
WINNER: Rey, at 22:43. I’m convinced these two could have a great match in their sleep. Hard to rank it with the other three with the commercial breaks and all. But it’s right up there with them.
Edge came out to attack Rey, but Rey fled the scene before he could get to him. He backed up the ramp and was attacked by Dolph Ziggler. Ziggler put him back in the ring, where Edge speared him. Jericho got an Edge-assisted Codebreaker as well. They invited Ziggler into the ring as the crowd peppered the men with loud chants of “you suck.” Ziggler waited for Rey to get to his feet, then caught him with his finisher. The announcers couldn’t understand why Ziggler would choose now to make an impact. He stood over the prone Mysterio as the show faded out.
Greg Parks has been covering Smackdown for PWTorch.com since January of 2007. You can also read his all-new blog in the VIP forum. Check out his column each week in the PDF-exclusive version of the Torch Newsletter. Comments, questions and feedback are welcome, and can be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org.
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