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KELLER'S ECW REPORT
JULY 9, 2009
TAPED IN BAKERSFIELD, CALIF.
AIRED ON SYFY NETWORK
Josh Matthews and Matt Striker introduced the show, hyping the Christian vs. Vladimir Kozlov match where the winner faces Tommy Dreamer for the ECW Title at Night of the Champions.
(1) Nikki Bella (w/Bri Bella) pinned Katie Lea Burchill in 2:00. Burchill dominated, but Nikki traded places with a fresh Bri at ringside and won within seconds thereafter.
Striker and Matthews spoke from ringside about the talent trades last week, then threw to a clip of Yoshi Tatsu beating Shelton Benjamin last week with one kick. Tatsu's ring intro took place. [c]
(2) Shelton Benjamin pinned Yoshi Tatsu in 9:00. Benjamin dominated the early minutes. Tatsu scored a near fall with a backslide, then Shelton bailed out to ringside and they took a break. [c] Shelton took control again after the break. Yatsu made a comeback at 8:00 and scored a near fall after a springboard kick. Shelton fired back with an overhead suplex, then finished Yatsu out of nowhere with his finisher. Good TV match. (**) [c]
The Raw Rebound aired.
(3) Ezekiel Jackson pinned Jack Meridol in 1:00. Total squash.
They went backstage and showed three production workers talking. Then a body fell off a ladder in the background. Hurricane ran up with a woman in his arms, apparently having caught her. Tiffany checked on the woman, who was stunned. [c]
WWE Fact: Last week, ECW was the most watched show on SyFy for the 40ths week in a row. Probably this week ends that streak with the different timeslot.
They replayed the Hurricane skit.
Episode two aired of the Abraham Washington Show. He said everyone has been talking about him after his debut last week. He said David Letterman and Jimmy Kimmel have been hating on him because his ratings are higher than Snoop Dogg in a hot air balloon. He introduced a big-name guest, Tommy Dreamer, as his guest this week. Washington said Dreamer is the biggest star in ECW history. He said he means that literally. He said last week his guests were twins, and this week it looks like his guest may be carrying twins. After a few more fat jokes, Washington asked what it's like to be a living legend and senior citizen in WWE. Dreamer mocked his humor and said he's proud to be champion. He shifted to promoting the TV main event. He asked Dreamer to pick a winner. Dreamer chose Christian. Vladimir Kozlov's music interrupted that prediction. Kozlov walked out and went nose-to-nose with Dreamer. Washington predicted Kozlov would be his opponent at NOC. [c]
(4) Christian pinned Vladimir Kozlov to earn a title shot against Dreamer at NOC. Dreamer joined Matthews and Dreamer on commentary. Kozlov backdropped Christian over the top rope to the floor at 2:00 and then rammed him into the ring apron afterward. Back in the ring Kozlov scored a two count. At 5:00 Christian made a comeback and scored a two count. Kozlov came right back with a dropdown torture rack for a two count. Christian fired back with an Unprettier for the win. (*)
THOUGHTS, COMMENTS, NITPICKS
BELLA VS. KATIE LEA: Not a lot to the match, but Katie Lea was aggressive and her offense didn't seen soft, which is a good change from a lot of the WWE women wrestlers...
SHELTON VS. YATSU: Yatsu looked good. He's flashy and seems to have good timing and a his offense and selling are both solid... It's still surprising Shelton's been positioned against Yatsu in an opening match type feud rather than in the ECW Title mix, but this win does indicate they're not putting him in a Charlie Haas stepping stone jobber type role, at least...
JACKSON VS. MERIDOL: One of the small fun aspects of squash matches, which I grew up watching as an AWA fan in the late-1970s and 1980s, are the various jobbers' reactions to their name being announced. Some give a dismissive wave that shows they're almost feeling defeated already, and others are just goofy like Meridol who quickly postured to the hard camera and shot his arm toward it. Then watching them get just smashed and decimated by the star is a blast if they're good at their role taking a convincing beating with great bumps. Meridol did a nice job here doing everything a good jobber should do in a very short match... Jackson has undergone quite the body transformation, much more cut and toned with washboard abs showing through now...
HURRICANE HELMS: Pretty lame. Why was the camera shooting three production guys talking backstage in the first place? The whole thing just breaks the tone of the show and forces everyone participating to try to figure out whether to take a slapstick tone or play it straight, looking ridiculous either way.
WASHINGTON-DREAMER: Washington mocking Dreamer for being fat does not work. Yes, in the WWE bubble Dreamer isn't cut or even lean. But walking out there in jeans and a sports jacket, Dreamer looked like the after picture of a successful diet, not a before picture. There isn't one person at home looking at him classifying him as fat. Not even one. So the lames jokes fall even flatter. The jokes might as well be making fun of him for being short or bald or old or something else nobody would think of when looking at him. Oh, they did. The next joke was how old he is. Uh, he's several years younger than Triple H and Batista, more than five years younger than Shawn Michaels and Undertaker, and only three years older than Rey Mysterio. It shows how the world WWE writers live in is so out of touch sometimes with reality... Washington's gimmick is a chance, perhaps, for the creative team and management to take shots at their talent under the guise of humor...
KOZLOV VS. CHRISTIAN: I'm all for wrestlers joining announcers on commentary. Dreamer, though, doesn't seem to have a real sense of who his character is. He was trying at times too hard to be cool and other times he was self-deprecating.
Matt Striker on the Bellas: "Don't adjust your TV sets. Those are two separate people."
Abraham Washington to Tommy Dreamer: "People want to know who was your toughest opponent. Let me guess. Jenny Craig.:
Tommy Dreamer in response: "That's really funny coming from a guy who looks like he spray painted his hair on tonight. I mean, seriously, did you use a Sharpie or how much pomade or lard do you have on that bad boy?"
Tommy Dreamer: "I know people say my body looks like a bag of milk, but I have bruises covering it."
Tommy Dreamer on wrestling Kozlov: "It was like fighting a couch, but then it fought back."
Tommy Dreamer after Matthews asked him what Christian's assets are: "Everything."
Josh Matthews: "With all due respect, that was a pretty lame answer you gave me." Send feedback on this article to firstname.lastname@example.org and we'll regularly publish reader feedback in the "Torch Feedback" category on the Main Listing.