WWE Smackdown Report CUPACH'S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 2/3: Alt. perspective review of No DQ main event, Rumble fall-out & Chamber hype, Mike's Reax
Feb 5, 2012 - 10:59:01 AM
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WWE Smackdown Review
February 3, 2012
Taped 1/31 in Omaha, Neb.
Aired on Syfy
By Michael Cupach, PWTorch contributor
-Last month when Randy Orton and Wade Barrett met in a Falls Count Anywhere match, Wade Barrett injured Orton for a month. Tonight, they are having a rematch that will be a no count-out, no disqualification match!
-After the Smackdown opening video and full pyro, Josh Mathews welcomes everyone to the first Smackdown on the Road to WrestleMania!
-Teddy Long is in the ring with new theme music. He starts off by saying that last Sundays Royal Rumble was “off the chain.” He says that looking forward to the Elimination Chamber, he would like to introduce the participants in the Smackdown Chamber match: Daniel Bryan, Wade Barrett, Big Show, Cody Rhodes, Mark Henry, and Randy Orton! The match will be for the World Heavyweight Championship. Teddy goes over the rules for the match and just as he is about to leave, Mark Henry’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring. Mark is talking to himself as he gets to the ring as only he can!
Mark starts off by saying that he doesn’t like this one bit because he has a mathematical chance of 6:1 of coming out the winner. He says he doesn’t deserve this. Teddy comes back by saying that he lost his title match last Sunday and he is lucky to be in the title match at all. Henry asks if he should be thankful for this. He demands that he be taken out of the Chamber match and booked in a one-on-one match for the World Title tonight! Teddy asks what will happen if he doesn’t, and Mark says that the people want it. Teddy says he will give him half of what he wants, he is taking Henry out of the match and told him that there will be no match for him tonight! Teddy was also poking Henry in the chest as he told him that.
Henry says that Long is replaceable and he isn’t asking for a match, he is demanding it. Henry then flits Long’s tie, so Teddy makes a bold decision of indefinitely suspending Mark Henry, starting now! Henry then grabs Teddy by the tie and says that if he is going to be suspended, then he will get his money worth. Sheamus’s music hits and Henry lets go of Long. The two wrestlers stare each other down until Teddy distracts Henry and Sheamus nails him with a Brogue Kick, sending Henry from the ring. Long quips that security is waiting for Henry and they will escort him out of the building! Teddy then asks Sheamus if he knows whom he will face at WrestleMania, Sheamus says that he will wait until after the Chamber match to make his choice.
Cody Rhodes interrupts and tells Sheamus to relax. He doesn’t want to fight him; he wants to warn him. He says that no one will even remember him for winning the match, what people will remember is Cody eliminating the most Superstars in the match, including two Hall of Famers. He claims that he did all the work for Sheamus. Cody says that he is taking his momentum to the Chamber match and he will become the World Champion and he will be the first dual champion since the Ultimate Warrior. He then compares the Warrior to Sheamus and Teddy Long, pointing out that he has no idea what any of them are saying when they speak. Teddy then makes a match between Cody and Sheamus for right now!
1 – IC champion CODY RHODES vs. SHEAMUS - non-title match
The match is joined in progress. Sheamus takes Cody down with a headlock takeover. Cody fights out and Sheamus knocks him back down with a shoulder block. Sheamus whips Rhodes into the far turnbuckle and Cody tries floating over, but Sheamus catches him and nails him with Finley's old finisher. Sheamus then ties Cody in the ropes and pounds away at his chest, knocking Cody out of the ring. Sheamus has a crazed look in his eyes as he goes outside the ring and tries throwing Cody face first into the post, but Cody slips behind him and shoves Sheamus into the steel post. Out of nowhere, Cody hits the Beautiful Disaster Kick and rolls Sheamus back into the ring for a two count.
Rhodes goes up top and connects with a gorgeous moonsault for another two count! Crossface variation by Rhodes, but Sheamus powers out and rams Cody into the turnbuckle, but Cody holds onto the hold and bulldogs Sheamus for another two count. Both men start trading left and rights, and Sheamus wins this encounter (shocking, I know). He then finally gains the upper hand with an Irish Hammer for a two count. Sheamus goes up top and hits Rhodes with a shoulder block from the top rope! Sheamus tries a Celtic Cross, but Cody slips out and tries the Beautiful Disaster. But, Sheamus ducks, then he grabs Cody and delivers his new finisher, which looks like a variation on the Vertebreaker!
WINNER: Sheamus by pinfall in 5:00 of TV time.
-Tonight: Wade Barrett vs. Randy Orton in a No DQ, No Count-out match!
-Cody is still at ringside when Smackdown returns, and he is holding his neck. Justin Gabriel’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring for a match. Cody is beside himself that the show is going on after his loss. Hunico and Camacho are out next. Hunico cuts a promo about people judging him and Camacho for the way they look. They aren’t thugs; they are just generic gimmicks that Vince thought up. Or, something like that.
Cody then jumps Gabriel from behind and Hunico and Camacho join in. They triple team Justin until The Great Khali’s music hits and he lumbers to the ring and clears the ring of the heels. Hunico tries sneak attacking Khali, but Khali gives him a chokeslam. Cole welcomes The Great Khali back for Smackdown. I would like to note that Cole doesn’t speak for me and the comments he makes are not a reflection of my opinions.
-Later tonight, Michael Cole will interview Daniel Bryan.
-Cole plugs WWE.com for extended Royal Rumble coverage.
-Teddy Long is backstage with Drew McIntyre, who is asking for another chance. Teddy says that Drew causes predictable TV because when people tune in, they know he is going to lose. Man, I wish Teddy were my boss. I could screw up week after week and never be fired, no matter how bad I am at my job. I have got to get an application! Drew exits and Santino enters. Santino says that last week, Santoshi didn’t work out as he had hoped, but his tag team partner will work out a lot better. Jim Duggan come sin chanting “U.S.A.” and Santino starts chanting “Italia” until Teddy gets sick of them and gives them a match with Epico and Primo, next. Exit Santino and Jim, enter Aksana. Teddy says that he is stressed out from suspending Henry and Aksana makes a bad “wood” pun because Hacksaw left his two by four behind.
-Hall of Fame video from Mondays Raw, announcing that Mike Tyson is going into the Hall of Fame this year.
-Santino and Hacksaw make separate entrances, and their match is next!
2 – WWE tag champions PRIMO & EPICO (w/Rosa Mendes) vs. SANTINO MARELLA & “HACKSAW” JIM DUGGAN - non-title match
I remember when Rosa was Beth Phoenix’s stalker. Oh, how far she has come! Santino and Epico start things out. Santino wrings Epico’s arm and tags in Duggan who clotheslines Epico down and yells “HOOOOO!!!” for the crowd. Epico corners Jim into the corner and stomps away at him. Tag into Primo and peppers him with rights hands to knock Hacksaw down. Rear chinlock from Primo and the crowd chants U.S.A. to get Duggan back into it, Duggan fights out and hot tags Santino who hip tosses Primo and flying chops him for a two count. Epico breaks up the count and that draws Duggan in, both men brawl to the outside. Marella calls for the Cobra, Rosa blows the Cobra a kiss, which causes enough of a distraction to allow Primo to hit the Backstabber for the win!
WINNER: Primo and Epico by pinfall in 2:30.
-Up next, Michael Cole interviews Daniel Bryan. Cole says he will ask the hard-hitting questions.
- Michael Cole, mid-ring, asks for everyone's attention. He says that fresh off his victory at the Royal Rumble in a triple threat cage match, he would like to introduce the most unlikely champion of all time, Daniel Bryan. Bryan comes out to a chorus of boos as Josh and Booker show still from last Sunday’s match. Bryan seems very proud to still be champion. Cole starts by acknowledging his criticisms of Bryan, but last Sunday he proved himself to Cole that he might be as good as he says he is. Cole admits that he was wrong about Daniel Bryan. So, after two months of Bryan being a heel, WWE Creative finally crosses the finish line and acknowledges that Cole was doing more harm than good by downplaying Bryan as a heel. Slow and steady did not win that race! Anyway, Cole offers his hand for Bryan to shake and Bryan grabs his microphone instead. Bryan says that he appreciates the sentiment, but this interview is not about Cole, it is about Daniel Bryan. Bryan dismisses Michael Cole from the ring.
Bryan says he succeeded in defeating two monsters that weighed almost a half a ton, thus proving that he is a great champion! Bryan says that he considers himself to be a great role model and he invites everyone to be like him and be a vegan. He implores the crowd to stop eating meat and the crowd boo’s vociferously. He says that eating meat kills your intestines worse than the cows, chickens, and pigs get killed in slaughterhouses. He calls people in Omaha the worst offenders when it comes to eating meat and that is why he is confident in saying that he is the healthiest person in the building! He then starts begging the crowd to be like him and stop eating meat and become as healthy as he is.
Bryan says that he is also tired of the prejudice against him. He has already proven how dominating he can be and doesn’t think he needs to defend against five other men in the Elimination Chamber. He also believes that he should have to face a man he beat four times and a man who purposely ran down his 98-pound girlfriend. Of course, he is talking about The Big Show. Bryan says that if Teddy Long doesn’t change his mind and take Show out of the match, then Bryan will take his case to the WWE Board of Directors to state his case and Teddy Long will end up in the unemployment line with John Laurinaitis and Mark Henry.
Big Show’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring, stopping on the way to give a little kid his hat. Show seems pretty happy for being a loser. He apologizes for not coming out earlier, but he was busy being sick in the back! He questions Bryan being a role model and lets him know that if you are a role model, you don’t tell everyone you are, you let people follow your actions. Show calls Daniel Bryan a pompous, arrogant, little ass, and after the Chamber, he will be a pompous, arrogant, little ass who is no longer World Champion. Show tells him that there is no place to run and no place to escape.
Bryan cuts him off by saying that he understands the odds and how the match works, but he knows that even if he doesn’t win, he knows that Big Show won’t win because he is a loser, Bryan starts slapping Show on the chest while saying that he has beaten him over and over again. Big Show has stood all he can and he beats up Bryan and chokeslams him. A.J. then makes her way to the ring to confront him. Bryan tries sneak-attacking Show, and Show goes to chokeslam him again, but A.J. intervenes and Big Show wraps his hand around her neck. Bryan slips out of the hold and Big Show lets go of A.J., who leaves the ring and hugs Bryan. Bryan says that he would never let her get hurt as Big Show looks on.
-Still to come, Orton vs. Barrett.
-Backstage, Natalya and Beth Phoenix are doing squats. Nattie is glad they are teaming up for a tag match and she lets one rip, then another, and she runs off. Beth can’t stand the smell and she flees. Santino then walks by and he sells the smell. My nephews who are six and eight are watching this with me sat here and blinked at the TV while this played. They laugh at most toilet humor and even they thought this was unfunny and stupid.
3 – TAMINA & AKSANA vs. Divas champion BETH PHOENIX & NATALYA
Nattie and Aksana start things off. Natalya bodyslams Aksana, and then she knocks Tamina off the apron. Nattie throws Aksana off of her after a DDT attempt. Beth tags herself in and delivers the Glam Slam for the win.
WINNERS: Natalya and Beth Phoenix by pinfall in 1:00
-Post-match, Nattie tries putting Aksana in the Sharpshooter, but Tamina blindsides her and then goes to the top rope and nails Nattie with a Superfly Splash.
Mike’s Reax: Golly, I am disappointed that the farting didn’t factor into the finish of the match. Darn. Drat. But, it does look like they are teasing a break up of Natalya and Beth. Who becomes the face is anyone's guess.
-At the announce table, Josh and Michael show the updates card for the Elimination Chamber match. They throw to a replay of Mark Henry being suspended earlier tonight. Great Khali is taking Mark Henry’s spot. Le sigh.
-They focus on the WrestleMania sign in the arena. Josh then throws to the John Cena video hype package.
-At the announce table, the announcers start talking about the main event for Smackdown and they throw to Matt Striker, who is with Randy Orton
-In Orton’s locker room Matt asks if Randy will be more conservative with Wade tonight, considering that last time they met, he was thrown down a flights of stairs. Randy says that he holds nothing back and he won’t hold back tonight. Randy says that if the roles were reversed he would throw Barrett down the stairs. He guarantees victory tonight and says that he will beat him at the Chamber as well and will walk out a ten-time World Champion!
-Wade Barrett makes his way to the ring with his more newer, more worse music. Not that his old music was setting the world on fire, but this music does not fit him. This music stinks. Cole plugs the new WWE YouTube channel and then shows clips of the Falls Count Anywhere match between Orton and Barrett from last December. The match ended with Wade tossing Randy down a flight of concrete stairs.
-Teddy is watching the match backstage. Daniel Bryan and A.J. barge in and Bryan says that A.J. is not safe with Big Show around and wants to know how Long can keep her safe. Long says that they can all watch the match together and discuss their options.
4 – WADE BARRETT vs. RANDY ORTON – No DQ match
Last week, Orton charged the ring and couldn’t wait to hands on Barrett. This week, he calmly enters the ring and poses for the crowd. Whatever happened to blood feuds? Rights and lefts from both men to start until Orton comes back with some European uppercuts to take control. Powerslam by Orton into a suplex. Garvin Stomp by Orton keeps Wade down. Orton gets Barrett on his feet, then launches him out of the ring. Randy follows him out and whips Wade into the barricade, then the other barricade, then sets Wade up on the steel steps and stomps the side of his head. Randy back suplexes Barrett onto the barricade and rolls him back into the ring. Orton searches around ringside for some plunder and pulls a table out form under the ring as Smackdown takes a break. So far, this match has been all Orton!
Smackdown returns with Orton trying to superplex Barrett onto the table in the middle of the ring. Barrett fights out and shoves Orton off the turnbuckle, through the table. Wade goes for the pin, but only gets a two count. The announcers play up the herniated disc that Orton had earlier in the year as Wade stomps on Orton's hurt back. A hard Irish Whip by Barrett into the turnbuckle and Wade starts stretching Orton's back around the steel ringpost.
Back in the ring, Barrett chokes Orton out on the top rope, then knees him in the face, and then boots Orton in the face to send him out of the ring. Orton tries to mount a comeback with some rights. He tosses Barrett over the barricade and the two men brawl into the audience with Orton doing most of the hitting. Both men make it back to ringside, and Orton clotheslines Barrett over the barricade and jumps off the barricade with an elbow to the back of the head. Barrett reverses a whip into the steps and takes a moment to catch his breath.
Both men get back into the ring. Wade brings a steel chair him with and whacks Orton on the back with the chair multiple times. Orton rolls around the ring, writhing in pain. Barrett sets up Orton for Wasteland onto the chair, but Orton fights out and powerslams Wade, then grabs the chair and swings away on Barrett! Orton wedges the chair between the ropes in the corner and whips Barrett into it head-first! Dropkick by Orton sends Barrett out of the ring.
Orton sends Wade flying over the announce table, then rolls him back into the ring where Orton DDTs him off the second ropes. Orton calls for the RKO, but Barrett blocks it and Bossman Slams Orton for a two count. Barrett thought he had him. Wade grabs a fresh chair from ringside and smashes Randy on his bad back again. Wade sets up a pumphandle slam on the steel chair, but Orton ducks behind him and nails Wade with the RKO! Orton doesn’t go for the pin; instead, he picks him up and RKOs Barrett again, this time on the steel chair for the win!
WINNER: Randy Orton by pinfall in 16:00.
Mike’s Reax: Very good match from both men. Randy was dominant for most of the match, but when he wasn’t in control, the back injury made for some believable nearfalls and sympathy spots. I do wonder if this will detour Barrett's rise or if he will move onto another babyface to feud with. Hopefully not The Great Khali.
-Backstage, Teddy Long tells Bryan that next week he won’t have to worry about Big Show because he will be facing Randy Orton! Bryan says he isn’t afraid of snakes and asks A.J. to stay in Teddy’s office and to watch the monitor.
-Bryan makes his way to the ring and celebrates with Orton. Orton is confused as to why Bryan is out with him and Smackdown fades out.
Thanks for reading, and please be sure to follow me on Twitter @MJCupach . I Tweet live during Raw and most WWE PPVs!
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