{"id":175147,"date":"2024-03-10T13:52:29","date_gmt":"2024-03-10T18:52:29","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/?p=175147"},"modified":"2024-03-10T13:52:29","modified_gmt":"2024-03-10T18:52:29","slug":"aew-collision-hits-misses-3-9-pac-returns-for-the-tenth-time-ftr-speaks-hook-exists-in-public-toni-awards-the-infantry-visit-copeland-joins-cmll-briefly","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/2024\/03\/10\/aew-collision-hits-misses-3-9-pac-returns-for-the-tenth-time-ftr-speaks-hook-exists-in-public-toni-awards-the-infantry-visit-copeland-joins-cmll-briefly\/","title":{"rendered":"AEW COLLISION HITS &#038; MISSES (3\/9): Pac returns for the tenth time, FTR speaks, Hook exists in public, Toni Awards, The Infantry visit, Copeland joins CMLL briefly"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"pwtor-186460615\" class=\"pwtor-before-content pwtor-entity-placement\"><hr \/><b>SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)... <\/b>\r\n\r\n<iframe src=\"https:\/\/widget.spreaker.com\/player?show_id=3076978&theme=light&playlist=false&playlist-continuous=false&autoplay=false&live-autoplay=false&chapters-image=true&episode_image_position=right&hide-logo=false&hide-likes=false&hide-comments=false&hide-sharing=false&hide-download=true\" width=\"100%\" height=\"140px\" frameborder=\"0\"><\/iframe>\r\n<hr \/><\/div><h3>AEW COLLISION &#8211; HITS &amp; MISSES<br \/>\nTAPED MARCH 7, 2024, IN DULUTH, GEORGIA<br \/>\nAIRED MARCH 9, 2024 ON TNT<br \/>\nBY DAVID BRYANT, PWTORCH CONTRIBUTOR<\/h3>\n<p><em>Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Nigel McGuiness, and not Kevin Kelly (because his career was maliciously sabotaged by the artist formerly known as Twitter).<\/em><\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p>&#8211; Hey! It\u2019s great to be back in the saddle (horses hate me) after a whirlwind trip that took me to 12 cities in 7 states and ended with me getting engaged to a very attractive man in his 20s who suffers from blindness, I assume.<\/p>\n<p>Anyway, welcome back to another of my AEW Collision Hits &amp; Misses columns, which is the only Hits &amp; Misses column that is dictated live into a tape recorder and then later transcribed in an attempt to save time, which it never does. Also, to be clear, when I say \u201clater transcribed,\u201d I mean entirely re-written, and when I say \u201cdictated live,\u201d I mean screamed into a tape recorder like Courtney Love having a breakup.<\/p>\n<p><strong>COLD OPEN \u2014 WELL CRAP<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>&#8211; This beloved (by me) segment apparently rode off into the sunset while I was busy having multiple car crashes in 12 cities in 7 states (a thing that actually happened), and I\u2019m frankly surprised to have returned to discover that it has ridden off into the sunset because the sun is 92.324 million miles away, and that seems like an overly dramatic exit for anything.<\/p>\n<p><strong>NEW PYRO \u2013 HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I loved seeing tonight\u2019s pyro utilize the contours of AEW\u2019s new set. It reminded me a little bit of Smackdown back in the day.<\/p>\n<p><strong>AEW\u2019S NEW SETS \u2013 MISS<\/strong><\/p><div id=\"pwtor-2348632723\" class=\"pwtor-content pwtor-entity-placement\"><div align=\"center\" data-freestar-ad=\"__336x280 __336x280\" id=\"pwtorchcom_test_300x250\">\r\n  <script data-cfasync=\"false\" type=\"text\/javascript\">\r\n    freestar.config.enabled_slots.push({ placementName: \"pwtorchcom_test_300x250\", slotId: \"pwtorchcom_test_300x250\" });\r\n  <\/script>\r\n<\/div><\/div>\n<p>I did not love seeing the contours of AEW\u2019s new set. It reminded me a little bit of TNA back in the day.<\/p>\n<p><strong>BRYAN DANIELSON vs. SHANE TAYLOR (w\/Lee Moriarty) \u2014 HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This match was fantastic because of course it was. My only wish is that AEW would utilize Shane Taylor at an even higher level going forward. Taylor has massive amounts of charisma, incredible in-ring abilities, and a great look when he is not wearing whatever it was he wore tonight. (Please bring back Taylor\u2019s black ring gear because, much like AEW\u2019s new set, those were not the contours I was looking for tonight.)<\/p>\n<p>However, this match was exactly what I was looking for tonight, and therefore, it was a big bit with me.<\/p>\n<p><strong>WILL OSPREAY TALKS SANDWICHES WITH BRYAN DANIELSON \u2014 HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Will Ospreay\u2019s voice sounds like a bass amp fell down a water well, but it works. In fact, if I could get away with it, I\u2019d try to sound that way, too, but I can\u2019t get away with it because my voice sounds like a small child fell down a helium well, which, for Kevin Kelly\u2019s sake, I would like to clarify is an analogy and not a thing that happens.<\/p>\n<p><strong>MATTHEW JACKSON &amp; NICHOLAS JACKSON &amp; OKADA vs. ADRIAN ALANIS (NO RELATION TO MORRISETTE), &amp; LIAM GRAY (NO RELATION TO CONAN) &amp; JON CRUZ (RELATED TO SERPENTICO\u2026 MAYBE) \u2014 MINOR-HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This match was a squash, and while squashes aren\u2019t exactly my favorite thing to consume, this one was less \u201czucchini\u201d and more \u201cpumpkin.\u201d<\/p><div id=\"pwtor-4006161098\" class=\"pwtor-content-1 pwtor-entity-placement\"><!-- Tag ID: pwtorchcom_test_300x600 -->\r\n<div align=\"center\" data-freestar-ad=\"__336x280 __300x600\" id=\"pwtorchcom_test_300x600\">\r\n  <script data-cfasync=\"false\" type=\"text\/javascript\">\r\n    freestar.config.enabled_slots.push({ placementName: \"pwtorchcom_test_300x600\", slotId: \"pwtorchcom_test_300x600\" });\r\n  <\/script>\r\n<\/div><\/div>\n<p><strong>PAC RETURNS FOR THE TENTH TIME \u2014 HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>While there\u2019s a solid 60 percent chance Pac will soon get sucked back into whichever bi-monthly void Lance Archer disappears into, I\u2019m going to enjoy this run while it lasts (especially if Penta and Eddie Kingston are involved.)<\/p>\n<p><strong>DARBY ALLIN IS LEAVING TO CLIMB MOUNT EVEREST \u2014 THAT TRACKS<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Darby Allin is leaving to do a very Darby thing, and while he is gone, I am going to miss watching his long-running feud with mortality. Please hurry back, and please remember that Peter Pan\u2019s line about man\u2019s \u201cgreatest adventure\u201d was not meant to be aspirational.<\/p>\n<p><strong>MARIAH MAY vs. TRISH ADORA \u2014 HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>For a six-minute match, this was way better than I was expecting. I think one reason I may have liked it so much is I\u2019m lucky enough to get to watch the Fite TV feed of AEW Collision with my fianc\u00e9 because he currently lives in Australia. Sadly, I will lose access to that when he moves in with me in the fall, which means I will lose access to two-thirds of most women\u2019s matches.<\/p>\n<p>That is not okay.<\/p>\n<p>Losing access to the commercial-free feed of AEW\u2019s shows shouldn\u2019t mean losing access to two-thirds of every one of their women\u2019s matches. AEW\u2019s women deserve better, and hopefully the arrival of Mercedes Monet will afford them better. That or she\u2019ll be on Rampage in two months.<\/p>\n<p>(Remember when Edge was a big deal? I hope Mercedes Monet remembers.)<\/p>\n<p><strong>THE TONI AWARDS (SPELLED WITH AN \u201cI,\u201d SO THEY DON\u2019T GET SUED) \u2014 MEGA-HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Finally! Mariah May got her flowers from Toni Storm, and by \u201cflowers,\u201d I mean shoe, and by \u201cshoe,\u201d I mean award, and by \u201caward,\u201d I mean an Oscar if it were presented by Oscar the Grouch.<\/p>\n<p>Side Note: I wonder if Storm\u2019s aggrandizement of May is indicative of a future face turn? I certainly hope so. Storm has a beautiful face, and it looks good turning.<\/p>\n<p><strong>NICK WAYNE vs. ADAM PRIEST \u2014 HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Nick \u201cHairless Persian Cat\u201d Wayne (who is secretly a Sphynx cat because Persian cats have hair, and Adam Copeland was clearly thinking of Sphynx cats when he started that chant) has somehow mastered the facial expressions of every twink-adjacent frat boy who ever endeavored to uttered the phrase \u201cpoppin\u2019\u201d in 2009, and I hate him for it, and I want more of it.<\/p>\n<p>Also, he\u2019s good at wrestling.<\/p>\n<p><strong>ADAM COPELAND BRIEFLY JOINS CMLL \u2014 MISS<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Of all the ways to disguise Adam Copeland, this was not it.<\/p>\n<p>Also, he appears to have stolen Spike Dudley\u2019s luggage.<\/p>\n<p><strong>CHRIS JERICHO vs. TITAN \u2014 MEGA-HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This was an outstanding match that was so good it would have remained enjoyable even if it had chosen to stand inside instead.<\/p>\n<p><strong>HOOK EXISTS IN PUBLIC \u2014 HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Hook, the sexiest thing Taz has ever been involved with, came out with a kendo stick to beat up The Gates of Agony, who were terrorizing Chris Jericho, and all I could think about was how much hotter Hook is than Sandman.<\/p>\n<p>Side Note: Hook should do more existing in public.<\/p>\n<p><strong>FTR CUTS A PROMO \u2014 HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Cash Wheeler cut a Tubthumping promo about getting knocked down and getting back up again, and Dax Harwood cut a promo in which he implied that FTR might be one of the greatest tag teams of all time. (They are.) All of this was very entertaining and very passionately expressed.<\/p>\n<p><strong>THE INFANTRY PAY A VISIT FROM ROH \u2014 MISS<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>While it is nice to see Carlie Bravo and Shawn Dean on the main roster, their cheap reference to \u201cThe Revival\u201d fell flat and caused me to miss part of their promo as I explained what they were talking about to my boyfriend, who has never seen an episode of NXT or Smackdown. (Storylines in one promotion should not require you to understand what happened in another promotion without an on-air explanation.)<\/p>\n<p><strong>ANGELICO vs. MISTICO \u2014 MINOR-MISS<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This match happened for some reason.<\/p>\n<p>For a split second, I thought I was watching Rampage. Don\u2019t get me wrong, this was a very entertaining match, and both of these men are very talented individuals, but watching this felt like I was watching \u201ca match for the sake of a match,\u201d which is a nice way of saying \u201cfiller.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>It was dazzling filler! But filler is still filler.<\/p>\n<p><strong>HOUSE OF BLACK vs. JEFF JARRET &amp; JAY LETHAL &amp; MARK BRISCO \u2014 MINOR-HIT<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>On the one hand, this match was far better than I expected it to be; on the other hand, I was expecting it to be hot garbage.<\/p>\n<p>There were several spots in this match that made me cringe and several spots that made me want to applaud. Seeing Mark Brisco fly elbow-first off the top turnbuckle into a pile of chairs (his elbow was bleeding afterward) made my teeth clinch, but on the other hand, I really enjoyed Brody King\u2019s guitar spot and Briscoe\u2019s burning table spot. In fact, I am thrilled to see that they have finally figured out how to do a burning table spot without either (a) missing the table or (b) murdering Cody.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p><strong>FINAL THOUGHTS<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This was a good episode of Collision, but it wasn\u2019t mind-blowing, and I know that AEW is capable of producing mind-blowing episodes of Collision because I have been criticized for how often I give this show \u201cA-level\u201d grades. However, this episode was not an \u201cA\u201d worthy episode. I hope AEW\u2019s decision to pre-tape Collision more often will not lead them to lower the quality of Collision\u2019s content.<\/p>\n<p>That said, this episode was definitely still worth watching, and I hope you will choose to do so.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p><strong>DAVID\u2019S DODGY MATCH RECOMMENDATIONS<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Match of the Night: Chris Jericho vs. Titan<\/p>\n<p>Second Best Match: Bryan Danielson vs. Shane Taylor<\/p>\n<p>Third Best Match: Mariah May vs. Trish Adora.<\/p>\n<p><strong>SHOW GRADE: C+<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Thank you all for reading. I truly appreciate it. And as always, I\u2019m still working on my sign-off, but until next week, remember, just because I have an opinion doesn\u2019t mean it is right, but I can assure you it is not left because I am not that limber.<\/p>\n<hr \/>\n<p><em>(David Bryant\u2019s vacation pictures can be found on his \u201cArtist Formerly Known as Twitter\u201d account @IamDavidBryant; a video of David Bryant doing the splits can be found on his Instagram account @IamDavidBryant, and David Bryant\u2019s Threads account is threadbare and also located @IamDavidBryant because David Bryant sucks at usernames. David is a published author, circus artist, drag promoter, male pageant winner, unrenowned musician, sloppy figure skater, and the inventor of the world\u2019s first colorblind stoplight for drivers who are only able to listen to Counting Crows. Less impressively, he studied screenwriting at the University of North Carolina School of the Arts.)<\/em><\/p>\n<div class=\"pwtor-end-article-groups pwtor-entity-placement\" id=\"pwtor-101962936\"><div id=\"pwtor-2509334266\"><div align=\"center\" data-freestar-ad=\"__336x280\" id=\"pwtorchcom_medrec_3\">\r\n  <script data-cfasync=\"false\" type=\"text\/javascript\">\r\n    freestar.config.enabled_slots.push({ placementName: \"pwtorchcom_medrec_3\", slotId: \"pwtorchcom_medrec_3\" });\r\n  <\/script>\r\n<\/div>\r\n\r\nTHANK YOU FOR VISITING<\/div><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<div class=\"mh-excerpt\"><p>AEW COLLISION &#8211; HITS &amp; MISSES TAPED MARCH 7, 2024, IN DULUTH, GEORGIA AIRED MARCH 9, 2024 ON TNT BY DAVID BRYANT, PWTORCH CONTRIBUTOR Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Nigel McGuiness, and not Kevin Kelly (because his <a class=\"mh-excerpt-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/2024\/03\/10\/aew-collision-hits-misses-3-9-pac-returns-for-the-tenth-time-ftr-speaks-hook-exists-in-public-toni-awards-the-infantry-visit-copeland-joins-cmll-briefly\/\" title=\"AEW COLLISION HITS &#038; MISSES (3\/9): Pac returns for the tenth time, FTR speaks, Hook exists in public, Toni Awards, The Infantry visit, Copeland joins CMLL briefly\">[&#8230;]<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":175150,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"episode_type":"","audio_file":"","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"","filesize":"","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":"","itunes_episode_number":"","itunes_title":"","itunes_season_number":"","itunes_episode_type":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[52,28,27],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-175147","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-opnionandanalysis","category-specialists_hitsandmisses","category-specialists"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-content\/uploads\/post\/2024\/03\/Screenshot-2024-03-10-at-1.46.00-PM.png","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/175147","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=175147"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/175147\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":175151,"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/175147\/revisions\/175151"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/175150"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=175147"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=175147"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pwtorch.com\/site\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=175147"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}