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TNA Impact on Spike TV
October 4, 2007
Taped September 25 in Orlando, Florida
Report by James Caldwell, Torch columnist

They start the show with an introductory video package on TNA's move from Wednesday Nights to FSN to the Internet to Saturday nights to Thursday nights to Thursday night prime time to two hours on Thursday night prime time. The voice-over man said there were times when it would have been easier to quit than push on, but they decided not to give into the fears of a mortal soul. It's the dawn of a new era in pro wrestling, according to the voice-over man. That marks the fourth or fifth time we've heard that line from TNA.

They go ringside for crowd shots, a shot of So Cal Val, and Tenay said Pacman Jones makes his in-ring debut this week. And yet somehow he's a tag champion. And they start the show with Black Reign Dustin Rhodes. Paging Scott D'Amore and Team Canada.

1 -- BLACK REIGN DUSTIN RHODES (w/Misty the Rat) vs. RHINO

Apparently, the connection between Rhino, Judas, and Dustin is that Dustin is now James Mitchell's soldier and Rhino picked up a feud with Judas, who was feuding with Abyss. Tenay said Mitchell is working 24 hours a day to get inside people's minds. That's for sure. The devil never sleeps. The match started with Rhino in control. He lined up a Gore at 2:00, but Dustin side stepped Rhino and landed an uppercut blow. Dustin landed a running Stunner for a nearfall at 3:00. Dustin settled into a mat hold, then suddenly, they cut backstage where Raven was sitting in the dark on a throne-like chair. That was random.

[Commercial Break]

They returned with Rhino executing a suplex in center ring. Rhino landed a series of suplexes before Rhino measured Dustin for the Gore, but Raven slipped to the outside and pulled Dustin out of the way. Dustin and Raven then knocked heads and Rhino rolled up Dustin from behind for the win.

[Q2]

After the match, Raven returned to the ring and attacked Rhino. Raven and Dustin then started beating on Rhino. Well, mainly Dustin, as Raven was already gassed. Dustin went up top for a splash on Rhino, but Abyss slowly walked out to make the save. He ran over Raven and Dustin, then Rhino speared Raven in the corner and to the floor. Abyss then guzzled Dustin and gave him a chokeslam. Suddenly, James Mitchell was in the ring. Abyss spun around and stared him down, causing Mitchell to collapse to the mat in fear. Abyss then snapped Mitchell's cane in half across his knee. Ah, that sucks. Abyss fought off a random Serotonin member, then Dustin retrieved his phallic object and smashed Abyss in the side of the head. He aimed for the spike to the head, but the lights went down. They came back on and Sting was in the ring to clothesline Dustin to the outside. Sting stood tall in the ring, but then Kurt Angle showed up on the video screen from a football field. He said he would have a message for Sting after the break. Don't drink and drive!

WINNER: Rhino in 8:00. There was a match? Well, at least TNA isn't bashful about presenting their brand of run-ins, interference, post-match activity taking precedence over in-ring action, and make-up-clad performers on the two-hour opening night. (*1/4)

[Commercial Break]

Sting was still in the ring, then Kurt Angle showed up from El Cajon, Calif. Angle's not at Impact tonight, and said he has some of Sting's family business to take care of. He said he's sorry Sting went all the way to Orlando to beat up Angle while Sting's son is playing football. Sting screamed that if Angle puts a hand on him, he would kill him. Angle smiled, then went back to clapping for Sting's son. Sting dejectedly walked out of the ring.

Jeremy Borash cut a Mobile promo backstage, then Jay Lethal and The Guru walked in. Lethal said he would take out Christopher Daniels at Bound for Glory: the grandmother of them all. Guru said he's tired of the talk of hate, and it should be about love and peace. Guru and Lethal dressed up Borash in Lethal's Savage outfit, then Team 3D jumped them. Ray grabbed Lethal's X Division Title and whipped him in the stomach. They continued to pound them into the backstage wall. Maybe the X Division is better off being off TV and forgotten so they don't have to get beat up everytime they're on TV.

The action moved to ringside where Team 3D rolled them into the ring. Ray landed a clothesline on Lethal, then Devon shoved Lethal to the outside. Back in the ring, Ray landed a hard chop to the chest. Shark Boy comically "stormed" the ring with a neckbrace and Ray faked being afraid of Sharkie, who took a clothesline from behind from Devon. Team 3D then slaughtered Shark Boy with a 3D in center ring. Ray then hit a leaping top rope powerbomb on Guru. Devon then rolled a table into the ring while Ray cut a promo on the crowd. Ray said that tonight it's Team 3D vs. Team Pacman and it better be for the tag titles. He said if it's not, they will continue to beat down every tag team and wrestler in TNA.

They cut backstage where Sting stormed past Crystal, the announcer, and went into the TV truck. He grabbed "Keith" and demanded to know how Angle got a live feed from California. Sting demanded air time to speak with Angle.

[Q3]

[Commercial Break]

They returned with Sting on a headset screaming at Angle. He said Sting tried to have him arrested, but all he did was sign an autograph and send the police on their way. Angle said he's going back to watching the football game.

They went to footage from earlier in the day when Crystal tried to interview Robert Roode while Ms. Brooks and half of her chest sat on the couch with Roode. Roode said he hired a marketing firm to get the right press on Robert Roode, Inc. Roode said he got his money from his dead grandfather, who left him a ton of money. He said things are going to change in TNA. Brooks just shook her head in disgust then Roode asked what her problem is. Roode reminded Brooks that she works for him. He told her to quit, but Brooks said she can't quit because her mother is sick. Roode told her to do her job and do something for him unlike the past 12 months. He told Brooks to win because losers are not acceptable in RR Inc. Roode said the interview is done, then he stormed off. Suddenly, Leticia walked in and started hollering at Crystal. Leticia and Crystal started an impromptu shoving match. And now there's a feud between the backstage interviewers.

2 -- GAIL KIM vs. MS. JACKIE MOORE (w/James Storm)

VKM and Roxxi came to ringside early in the match, followed by Christy Hemme and her team of Hoyt and Rave. Back in the ring, Gail fired up with clotheslines at 3:00. She landed a knee drop for a nearfall, then dropped Jackie with a cross-arm neckbreaker for the win.

After the match, Roxxi jumped Gail in the ring and they exchanged blows. Christy then entered the ring and took a forearm blow from Gail. Jackie, Roxxi, and Christy then ganged up on Gail to start a beat down on Gail. She ducked a boot from Roxxi, though, and bailed to the outside to avoid the three heel divas. Suddenly, the divas turned on each other and started brawling in the ring.

WINNER: Gail in 4:00. Good energy during the match. It was quickly forgotten with the post-match activity. (*)

Backstage, Borash interviewed Jim Cornette in his office while Matt Morgan stood in the corner. Cornette booked the tag title match, only to shut up Team 3D. Sting then stormed the office and screamed at Cornette, who just found out about the Angle deal. Cornette said Angle's back on the monitor.

[Commercial Break]

They returned to Angle sitting in the stands. He imitated Howard Cosell, which missed the target demographic. Angle said that the guy "Larry" who Sting sent to California to take care of him will now walk with a limp for the rest of his life. Angle said he had to go back to the game. Sting huffed and puffed and knocked over Cornette's table. Cornette could only watch.

3 -- TEAM PACMAN (RON KILLINGS & PACMAN JONES) vs. TEAM 3D (BROTHER RAY & BROTHER DEVON) -- TNA Tag Title match

Team 3D brought a football to the ring. Tenay said they want to get inside Pacman's head by bringing a football to the ring. Yes, mind games in the form of a football. Apparently, Team Pacman is the babyface team here. The bell sounded and Ray pounded the pigskin before placing it on top of the corner turnbuckle. Devon and Killings started things off, then Pacman tagged in. Ray said he wanted a piece of Pacman, so Devon tagged out to him. Ray brought his football into the ring and asked Pacman if he remembers how to play football. Ray then went into a three-point stance and charged Pacman, who jumped over him easily. Ray then took the football away from Pacman and threw it at Pacman's chest. Pacman picked it up and chucked it at Ray's back. Pacman then avoided all contact and tagged out to Killings, who dropped Ray on the mat and hit a top rope legdrop to the crotch. Killings and Pacman, not seasoned as tag champions, started dancing and playing around without going for a pin on Ray, who came up with a clothesline on Killings. He then went for a chair shot on Killings, but Killings ducked and hit a leg whip dropkick, sending the chair into Ray's face.

[Q5]

Pacman picked up the chair and threatened to hit Ray, but VKM came to ringside and jumped Killings. Pacman then chased VKM away with a chair as the ref called for the bell. Team 3D gave Killings a 3D back in the ring. The Steiners then came to the ring and Team 3D quickly bailed.

WINNER: No Decision in 6:00. Another "match" for Pacman without any contact between him and the opponents. Not a surprise with the non-finish to a title match on TV. The show is 100 percent more of the same booking. (1/2*)

[Commercial Break]

Backstage, Borash found Raven, who Borash said threw his hat back into the mix in TNA. Raven cut a promo that people say he's washed up. It's the same they said about Funk in the '80s, he said. Raven learned a valuable lesson to let the Joes, Christians, and Kurts beat each other up before he comes in like a vulgar. He said when he gets back in shape, he wants a piece of Rhino and Abyss. He wanted a match at Bound for Glory. Abyss then entered the shot and grabbed Raven by the throat and said, "Let's make it Monster's Ball. And bring Black Reign with you." Abyss screamed off camera.

4 -- GAUNTLET MATCH

Kaz and James Storm started the match. Tenay used the time to talk about the fight for your right match at the PPV. Suddenly, a clock appeared and Robert Roode walked out for the match. A TNA Mobile graphic appeared plugging the text messaging service. A clock appeared again and Tenay was handed a memo from Cornette's office. Gail, Roxxi, Christy, and Jackie have been barred from this match. Petey Williams then came out. Eric Young came out as the fifth participant and slapped hands with people on the front row. Jimmy Rave came out next and the crowd went quiet. Tenay said Rave had rave reviews from wrestling in Japan. Chris Sabin came out next. Still no eliminations. Ms. Brooks then walked out on the ramp to get a closer look at the action. Alex Shelley came out next and the MCMG started working over Rave in the corner. Petey was then eliminated first. Rave out second. There was action in the ring, but the director found Brooks's chest more inviting. Hoyt then came out and powerhoused on everyone in the ring.

[Q6]

Sabin was eliminated after a failed double-team attempt with Shelley. The final participant was Chris Harris, who ran over Hoyt and Shelley. Roode then shoved Kaz through the ropes and Brooks checked on Kaz. Roode got jealous and started pounding on Kaz on the floor while screaming at Brooks.

[Commercial Break]

They returned with a replay of Chris Harris being eliminated during the break. Shelley got caught up top and Hoyt kicked him to the floor for the second elimination of MCMG. Young and Roode then worked together to eliminate Hoyt. That alliance lasted two seconds, as Roode and Young went back to feuding. Kaz then slipped to the outside and kissed Brooks on the hand before eliminating Roode. Impressive. But, Kaz was then knocked out by Storm and a superkick.

4b -- ERIC YOUNG vs. JAMES STORM

Young landed a dropkick in the opening seconds of the one-on-one match, then Storm slapped on a sleeper hold in center ring. Young propelled himself off the top rope, though, and bridged Storm into a pin while still in the sleeperhold to score the win. Storm was not happy afterward. Young gets a slot in the Fight for Your right match at the PPV.

WINNER: Young in 20:00. Crowd-pleasing finish to a serviceable 20 minutes of TV. Just a band-aid on the larger issue of not giving these mid-card wrestlers individual TV time to get over a personality or create an actual issue between the wrestlers to see a conflict carried out over the course of an eight-to-twelve-week program. (**)

Tenay and West talked about Christian, Styles, and Tomko having issues earlier today. They showed footage of Styles and Tomko talking about random stuff while Christian was left out. Styles said he's going with Tomko to Japan. Christian asked why. Tomko asked Christian if he remembers that when he's champion, he has to defend the belt. Christian told Styles to stay home because he's not going to Japan. Styles was deflated, while Tomko just walked off.

[Q7]

[Commercial Break]

They aired a video package on the Ultimate X match. Senshi said one must prepare mentally, physically, and spiritually for this challenge. LAX vs. XXX is the X match at the PPV.

They went back to Kurt Angle, who talked to Vanessa the Cheerleader. We only saw the back of her head and outfit. Angle told her that Sting's son's father slapped his wife. She quietly gasped. Angle said he's going to slap Sting's son on the ass...in private. Paging Larry Craig. Angle said he would get revenge on Sting one way or another.

They aired a video package on the Christian vs. Joe feud. It's the biggest stage of our time, according to the voice-over man.

5 -- TRIPLE X (CHRISTOPHER DANIELS & SENSHI w/Elix Skipper) & A.J. STYLES & CHRISTIAN CAGE vs. LAX (HOMICIDE & HERNANDEZ) & JUNIOR FATU & SAMOA JOE

The bell sounded and Tenay said they would rejoin Angle in California after the match, as the football game just ended. LAX started things off by working over Daniels. Daniels, the #1 Contender to the X Division Title, had enough of the face team and tagged out to Styles, who was afraid of Fatu's caboose. Fatu cleared Triple X to the outside, then Homicide flew through the middle ropes with a flip dive onto both men. Skipper then became involved on Homicide, allowing Christian to take control as they cut to a break.

[Commercial Break]

[Q8]

They returned with Senshi working over Homicide with a head scissors on the mat. The heels continued to isolate Homicide in their corner. Homicide finally came back with a double DDT and he made the hot tag to Joe, who cleaned house. Christian took a snap powerslam for a nearfall, then the action broke down in the ring. Fatu stacked up XXX in the corner and landed a sandwich splash. Daniels dropped to the corner and Fatu did his signature turn around to measure Daniels for a stink face. The action broke down again and Hernandez flew over the top rope when Senshi pulled to the top rope down. Joe and Christian remained in the ring and Joe slapped on the rear naked choke. Daniels made the save for Christian and raked Joe in the eyes before kicking him to the corner. LAX then double-teamed Daniels and Homicide hit a top rope bulldog. West wheezed uncontrollably as he called the rapid-fire action including Hernandez flying over the top rope with a big splash on Styles. Back in the ring, Senshi went for the double foot stomp on Joe, but Joe moved and clotheslined Senshi and Christian. Skipper suddenly found himself in the ring and he took Fatu's sit-down shoulder breaker. Joe then put Christian up top and Senshi missed Joe with a kick and nailed Christian. Joe then caught Senshi with the Muscle Buster for the pin and the win.

WINNERS: Joe & Fatu & LAX in 16:00. Really nice action to fill a quarter-hour of the show. Very fast-paced taste of what Impact is supposed to deliver on a weekly basis. The only issue is that they didn't have a chance to really focus on the individual match-ups of LAX vs. XXX, Christian vs. Joe, and Daniels vs. that X Division champion guy for the PPV. (**3/4)

They went back to Angle, who said Sting's son had three touchdowns and 16 solo tackles. They showed Sting watching backstage on a monitor. Angle said he's doing this because he wants to face the old Sting with the fire and passion at Bound for Glory. He said the only way he's going to bring that old Sting back is to do what he's about to do. Angle then chased down Sting's son in the parking lot, but he shoved the door into Angle. Angle then pulled Sting's son out of the car and started to choke him before cutting off the feed.

They closed with a video package set to the tune of "The Biggest Letdown". Oh...kay.

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