TV Reports
10/4 TNA Impact review by Wilkenfeld: Where they've been, where they're going
Oct 7, 2007 - 12:01:02 PM |
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TNA Impact review
October 4, 2007
Aired on Spike TV
Report by Daniel Wilkenfeld, PWTorch.com contributor
We open with a self-congratulatory retrospective on the ups and downs of TNA history. The package concludes with snapshots of TNA's top stars - inexplicable in their inclusion: Robert Roode and VKM. On the other hand, promising in their inclusion: LAX.
[Opening Credits - new video package]
And we start off the new era of TNA with…Black Reign. Huh - not exactly the direction I would have gone.
(1) Rhino defeats Black Reign. Black Reign brings a mysterious black box to ringside that is never explained. Much to my surprise, this is actually a perfectly respectable wrestling match. As discussed last week in regard to Judas Mesias, sometimes a lame gimmick can actually blind me to an otherwise passable wrestler. Raven mysteriously rises in his throne during the match.
[Commercial Break]
Raven makes his way down to ringside and pulls Black Reign out of the way of Rhino's first attempt at a Gore. Rhino and Raven brawl a bit on the apron, but when Reign tries to take advantage Rhino dodges and hits a School Boy for the win.
After the match, Raven and Reign take it to Rhino. This could be a good use of both men - Raven works best with lackeys, and I could buy Black Reign as a member of the Flock. Abyss comes out to make the save, presumably to pay Rhino back for helping him out with Judas Mesias. I would not have read Abyss as a reciprocating kind of guy, but I guess that just goes to show you. Rhino and Raven brawl to the back, and James Mitchell tries to ambush Abyss in the ring. Abyss just turns around and stares Mitchell down, then breaks his cane. The distraction is enough for Havok to come out (one would assume he's there to defend Raven, but Raven is already gone), but Abyss just no sells a kendo stick shot and hits the black hole slam. When Abyss turns back to Mitchell, Reign is able to get the upper hand with that pick-axe-like weapon of his. Suddenly the lights go out, and Sting is there to make the save for his erstwhile tag-team partner Abyss. Reign and Abyss brawl to the back, and then Kurt Angle appears on the video screen, promising some football after the break.
[Commercial Break]
Angle's in California watching Sting's son play football. He claims that if he had a son he wouldn't miss any of his football games. Sting is understandably irate.
Borash is in the back with Jay Lethal and Sonjay Dutt. Lethal is largely incoherent, and Dutt goes off about how love is the answer. How is he not heel? Team 3D comes from out of nowhere and beats them all the way down to the ring. Shark Boy comes out to try to make the save again this week, only to eat a 3D himself. This could actually be the start of something moderately amusing if they make Shark Boy the Groundskeeper Willie of TNA (see the earlier Halloween episodes). Ray hits a nasty looking powerbomb off the top rope on Sonjay Dutt and then they put Lethal through a table. They declare that this is what'll keep happening if they don't get a shot at the tag team titles.
Sting grabs a producer in the truck and, in a nice bit of logic, questions why he would have ever given Kurt Angle a live feed to stalk his son. Said producer swears he had no idea what Angle would do, and Sting accuses him of only being interested in ratings. That seems like a relatively human response. Sting demands a means of talking to Angle and is told it will take a few minutes.
[Commercial Break]
Sting's on the mic with Angle, and tells him he went over the line. Angle seems pleased that he's got Sting angry and, in another nice bit of logic, briefly explains how he dealt with the police Sting had sent to the field.
Crystal is in the back with Robert Roode and Ms. Brooks. Roode does his usual whining and explains how he got his money from his dead grandfather. That's a somewhat lame plot device, but it does explain how he went from being the enforcer for Team Canada to being an "industry." Brooks rolls her eyes when Roode mentions Kaz, and in a bit of dialogue we find out that when she first took the job as his manager there was something between her and Roode, but now she just needs the money. That was a lot of development - between this and the various logic points, does anyone else get the feeling that someone in TNA just completed a screenwriter's course? If so, good for them. Roode tells her she better win the women's title at Bound for Glory.
After the interview, Letisha comes out and neither she nor Crystal seem to know each other. That seems fair, since until about 3 weeks ago I thought they were the same person. Letisha mentions that she's on the cover of some Playboy spin-off, as apparently 2 hour wrestling shows are required by law to have at least one women's feud a year predicated on who was on the cover of Playboy.
(2) Gail Kim defeats Jackie Moore (w/ James Storm). During the match VKM comes down to the ring with Roxxie Leavaux and Hoyt & Rave come down with Christy Hemme. Between all the extra-curriculars Gail Kim and Jackie Moore have a perfectly watchable match, ending with Kim hitting a slam from behind with Jackie's arms crossed around her throat. It looks a lot like William Regal's Union Jack, if that helps. After the match, Jackie, Chirsty and Roxxi team up to try to beat down Gail Kim, but she slips away and the three of them turn on each other. They seem to be making the story of the BFG women's match Gail Kim vs. the world, which is fine by me.
Cornette's in the back, and announces that since he's sick of Team 3D whining, he'll make their match tonight against Team Pacman a title match. Yeah, that'll show'em. He does say that 3D will learn tonight that "what goes around comes," but refuses to elaborate. Sting bursts into the office demanding answers, but Cornette swears that he was ignorant of Angle's plan as well.
[Commercial Break]
Sting's still in Cornette's office, watching the feed from Kurt Angle. So does Sting just hang out there now? It's not quite as cool as the rafters. Angle's doing his best Howard Coselle imitation, and mentions that he dispatched the friend Sting sent to deal with Angle. Sting sent one guy to deal with Kurt Angle? That doesn't seem very bright. Back in Cornette's office, Jim says that if Sting lets Angle into his head, then he (Angle) wins. I'm thinking the man who just gave Team 3D a title shot for putting his X Division Champion through a table should not be giving lessons in how to deal with aggressors. Sting overturns Cornette's desk, which does not speak well of whomever furnishes the Impact Zone.
(3) Team Pacman defeats Team 3D (via DQ). Team Pacman now has a joint pose in their entrance, which might suggest that they're staying together longer than I would have anticipated. Either the Truth or the camera guy is a little off his game tonight, as you can see Killings whiff on a couple of his kicks. Pacman comes in and leapfrogs over a rush from Brother Ray. They throw a football at each other, and then Pacman low-bridges Devon when he tries to interfere. Team Pacman hits a Wuzzup? on Brother Ray, and whoever is in charge of scripting Pacman's actions so that he's not actually hitting anyone is doing a hell of a job tonight. Team Pacman starts celebrating, but Brother Ray takes advantage and grabs a chair. Jones gets the chair away from him, but before he can do anything, VKM comes out and assaults the Truth. They could be costing 3D the titles on Cornettes orders, or, more likely, they're upset because they're basically running the same program as 3D - they claim that they are the real dominant tag team in TNA and that they should get the unearned title shots. Sadly the announcers do not deign to explain. After the bell, the Steiners come down and chase off 3D. I would have sent them down to cost 3D their title shot, but maybe there's some long-term plan for a VKM-3D program?
[Commercial Break]
Borash catches Raven in the back, and comments that he seems to be back in the mix. Raven then launches into one of his patented diatribes, claiming that while many claim he's past his prime, they said the same thing about Funk before he won the ECW title. He might be older, but he can just wait for the young ones to tire themselves out fighting each other before swooping in. He says that while he's trying to get back in shape, he wants to wrestle Abyss and Rhino, as they're crazy enough to fight him off as he's brutalizing them. Abyss pops into the frame, and says they might as well make it a Monster's Ball, and bring Black Reign along.
This was probably the best TNA promo in ages that didn't involve Christian Cage - it single-handedly made me interested in a new match at Bound for Glory and made me feel like one of my favorite wrestlers from a few years ago might finally be back in form. Why you would ever have Raven on the roster and not let him talk is beyond me.
(4) Eric Young defeats James Storm, Chris Harris, Kaz, Lance Hoyt, Jimmy Rave, Robert Roode, Petey Williams, Chris Sabin, and Alex Shelley. Kaz and James Storm start things up, and are joined a minute later by Robert Roode. Not surprisingly, Kaz's offense is the highlight of this portion of the match. Petey Williams is out next and hits a flurry of cool offense as well. Eric Young and Rave come out, but the match really picks up with Sabin's entrance. He hits a tornado kick/DDT which brings back fond memories of the early X Division. Shelley comes out next, and the crowd is the loudest it's been. Some Motor City Machine Gun offense takes out Petey Williams and Jimmy Rave. Hoyt comes out, and there's a nice moment where Eric Young locks in a headlock and then grins maniacally, as if he nailed a Pedigree or something - Hoyt promptly shrugs him off and then eliminates Sabin. Harris is out last, and is a house o'boring fire. That man needs a heel turn more than John Cena. The crowd is fairly rocking at this point. Kaz goes through the ropes, and Roode follows to keep laying some smack down on him.
[Commercial Break]
During the break, Roode took out Harris. The crowd starts dueling "Let's go Shelley/Let's go x" chants, but they can't seem to agree on the x and so end up just cheering Shelley. Unfortunately, he chooses that moment to go for a move off the top, and gets eliminated. Eric Young and Robert Roode team up to take out Lance Hoyt, but then remember they hate each other. Kaz comes to aid Young, then slides out to kiss Ms. Brooks. When Roode comes over to complain, Kaz comes back in, clotheslines him over the top, skins the cat back onto the apron, and then gets superkicked off by Storm. Cool. James Storm locks in a sleeper, but Young falls back on top of him for the pin. He celebrates with the crowd, who seem happy but not nearly as excited as they would have been six months ago.
Earlier today, Tomko went to Japan to defend his IWGA Tag Team Championship. When Christian objects, Tomko gets a bit lippy.
[Commercial Break]
Angle's still out in California, telling random people how Sting slapped his wife. There's some talk of a congratulatory slap on the ass, but I'm just going to ignore that.
Christopher Daniels [photo by Wade Keller (c) PWTorch]
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(5) LAX & Samoa Joe, & Junior Fatu defeat Christopher Daniels & Senshi & Christian Cage, & A.J. Styles. This is the sort of match I expected them to lead off with. Lots of action, a tiny amount of storytelling, but mostly just a really good time.
[Commercial Break]
The story after the break is that Homicide is a face-in-peril before hitting a double DDT and making a hot tag to Joe. Joe goes on to kill the entire opposition, and when he pauses to catch his breath we get a pier-six brawl. Highlights of the match include Homicide's somersault topé to the outside, Hernandez's no-hands splash to the floor, Joe hitting a Senton splash on Senshi on Daniels, and Homicide nailing a Diamond Cutter on Daniels while he (Daniels) is being held up on Hernandez's shoulders. The crowd is chanting "This is awesome" by the finish, and it is. Speaking of finishes, Senshi accidentally kicks Christian out of the ring and then eats a Muscle Buster for the loss.
Angle is still in California, and he approaches the little Stinger (Garrett) after the game. Garrett first attempts to argue that none of this has anything to do with him, and then tries to nail Angle with his car door. Angle starts to beat him down, then tells Sting that he'll have to imagine the rest as he takes out the camera.
Where We've Been:
This is the third time in the last two years that they've done a heel-stalks-face's-family angle. In general, I don't tend to like the cheap heat it garners, but in this case it's being done a bit better then usual. First, Garrett's being neither overly young nor weak makes it seem a little bit more sportsmanlike. Second, Angle has shown the rare ability to be slimy and funny without being cartoonish at the same time, which helped make these skits work. Finally, they just don't have time for anything subtler. They only started the Angle-Sting feud five or six weeks before the scheduled pay-off match, and so they need to saturate the product with conflicts between the two to make this seem like a big deal. So far, they're doing a fairly decent job of it, and also of providing further motivation for Sting's continued darkening in the next month or two (or ideally by the BFG main-event).
Where We're Going:
Where we're going is where wrestling was a few years ago (most notably Smackdown under Heyman's booking). There was perhaps some over-reliance on sketches to advance the plot, but mostly there were just some interesting characters and matches that didn't feel overly rushed. We seem to also be going to a realm where TNA wrestlers will finally get the screen time they need to break through. I was extremely pleased by the selection of tonight's main event. Of eight wrestlers, only two were cast-offs from other companies. One of those two left on his own terms after being notoriously underutilized and the other was only in tonight's match as a fun gimmick. LAX, Christopher Daniels, Samoa Joe, AJ Styles, and Senshi all got to take center-stage in a company they built. Angle did appear afterwards, but the night belonged to Samoa Joe. If this is the shape of things to come, I'm going to be a fairly happy fan.
Tonight's Show: What a difference a week and an hour make. This show worked in everyone I wanted to see, and even featured wins by Eric Young and LAX. I would perhaps have given one of the marquis matches a bit more time, but that's a relatively minor complaint on a highly entertaining night. A-
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