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ECW TV Report
October 16, 2007 in Birmingham, U.K.
Year 2, Week 19 (Week 71 overall) on Sci-Fi

The show started with an exterior shot from outside the building. They're doing a handicap match with C.M. Punk and a mystery partner against Big Daddy V, Morrison, and Miz for tonight's main event.

And they're starting with the former champion, John Morrison, and his slow-motion hair-waving-in the-breeze music video intro. Joey Styles told us our dreams are coming true when we get to pick from V, Miz, and Morrison to face Punk for the title at Cyber Sunday. Seriously.

In the ring, Morrison silenced the boos and told the fans to listen for the buzz. He said his time has come, so dream, love, and scream. He showed off his chest and six pack for reason why fans should vote for him, then they rolled footage from last week when Morrison worked over Punk and won a non-title match. The Miz then interrupted, creating more boos. Miz questioned Morrison on his catchphrase, then he said he gets more girls in one night than Morrison in a lifetime. He said he's bored with girls. So he's into guys? Miz said chicks dig him, and their men fear him. He said that's why the WWE fans are going to pick him. That didn't make sense, then Miz and Morrison had a brief discussion. Big Daddy V had enough and walked out to discuss things in a more civil manner. Well, Striker did the talking for V, who looked at both men with hatred. Striker called him the most dominant force in ECW history, and said the fans have no other choice but to pick him. V channeled Abyss and said the ECW championship will be his.

C.M. Punk had enough of the heel discussion and walked out on stage with a huge grin on his face. He said all three men make...extremely...valid points, but even his vote counts. Punk ran down the list of possible opponents with a back handed complement for Morrison before saying no one likes Miz. Punk said he can pick anyone tonight for the handicap match, then he introduced his tag partner: Kane. Commence televised brand merger. Kane and Punk entered the ring and stared down the heels.

[Commercial Break]

[Q2]

1 -- ECW champion C.M. PUNK & KANE vs. THE MIZ & BIG DADDY V (w/Matt Striker) & JOHN MORRISON

Morrison and Punk picked up where they left off, with Morrison working on the injured ribs. Punk escaped with a monkey flip and tagged out to Kane, who worked on Morrison. Punk came back in and worked on Morrison until Morrison regained control with a hard knee to the gut. Miz took advantage of the situation and started to work over Punk's injury. Fans don't like Miz in the slightest here. V tagged in and got him some, then Morrison returned and continued the heel work. The heels knocked Punk to the floor and they cut to a break.

[Commercial Break]

They returned with Punk still taking a pounding from Morrison. Styles brought up the .com storyline that Armando and Vickie are having talks about working together between the two brands. Kane finally took a hot tag at 13:00 and flipped Morrison onto his back with a back body drop. He clotheslined Morrison hard into the corner before landing a sidewalk slam. Kane went to the corner for a top rope move and landed a leaping clothesline for a nearfall when Miz broke up the pin. Kane casually dropped Miz with an uppercut, then V took a tag and stared down Kane. McMahon wet his pants as the big men started trading blows. V had the better of Kane until Kane met him with a big boot that sent V over the top rope to the floor. Miz was left in the ring with Kane, who dropped him with a big chokeslam. Kane with the pin on Miz for the win. And everyone ran down the stands to the front of the guardrail. Kane stood tall facing the hard camera while looking over his shoulder at Punk, who stood off to the side with the title belt in hand.

WINNERS: Punk & Kane in 15:00. Nice tag match to fill the first half of the show. Hot crowd is helping the show, which has been severely lacking energy lately. (*1/2)

[Q3]

Styles and Tazz broke down the Cyber Sunday card. Kane then did the big pyro blast while Punk held his title in the air.

[Commercial Break]

They plugged a new Undertaker DVD featuring all of Taker's 15 wins at WrestleMania. Styles and Tazz recapped the end of the tag match, then they went backstage where Morrison shoved Miz down and asked him what that was all about. Miz and Morrison argued about costing each other votes for being losers. Morrison asked Miz how he feels about losing again tonight. He suggested another match, then Miz said he just got chokeslammed by Kane, so screw that. He slapped Morrison across the face, then bent down and told Morrison he's on. That's the most passion I've seen from Miz on WWE TV ever. Nice segment.

Styles and Tazz recapped the Balls Mahoney-Kelly Kelly storyline. They went to an interview set where Balls Mahoney was at a loss for words trying to explain Miz's pimping of Extreme Expose. He said Kelly is stuck between a rock and a hard place. Balls said he's the hard place. Hahahaha. Kelly then walked onto the set and surprised Balls. She said shouldn't do this, but she's doing it anyways. Kelly took a deep breath and asked Balls if she'll go out with her. Balls snapped to attention and hugged her. He instantly became the overbearing boyfriend and started listing off a ton of plans with Kelly while they walked away arm in arm.

Backstage, Vickie and Armando discussed business plans. Vickie said it's a two-way deal and she expects ECW wrestlers to show up on Smackdown. Vickie then said she also brought a tag team with her. In walked Jesse and Festus. Vickie wasn't sure what to make of the...um...challenged tall guy. Jesse did the talking and thanked Mr. Armando for the opportunity to be on ECW. He said they're in tag action next. They left and Armando checked with Vickie to make sure there's not something wrong with the tall one. Vickie said they're an awesome tag team once the bell rings.

[Commercial Break]

[Q4]

Next Monday on Raw, they're doing the big main event tag match with HBK & Hardy vs. Kennedy & Orton.

Hey, look, they repackaged Nunzio! He's now a tough guy Italian with sweat pants and a toothpick in his mouth. He's teaming up with Elijah Burke to face Jesse and Festus. Before the match started, Jesse took the mic and explained the bell ringing deal with Festus.

2 -- JESSE & FESTUS vs. ELIJAH BURKE & NUNZIO

The bell sounded and Festus grunted at Burke, who ran into a shoulder block. Nunzio tagged in and took a pounding from Festus before Jesse tagged in. The heels worked on Jesse before he made a hot tag to Festus, who ran over Nunzio with left and right hooks. He landed a big boot to the face before nailing Burke with a big elbow smash. Festus then launched Jesse across the ring with a big splash on Nunzio for the win. The bell sounded and Festus went back to being "docile", as Styles put it.

WINNERS: Jesse & Festus in 4:00. Just a tag match to get some Smackdown faces on the ECW show. J&F have a unique look and persona, which is more than can be said for many of the other tag teams on the roster. (1/2*)

[Commercial Break. I hope there's a Popsicle inside the Orange Box.]

They aired clips from Raw focusing on Andy Simmons taking a huge beating from Umaga last night while Mr. McMahon creeped everyone out. Ringside, Tazz hopped on his laptop and picked a First Blood match for Umaga vs. Triple H at the PPV.

[Q5 -- over-run]

3 -- THE MIZ vs. JOHN MORRISON

The bell sounded and they started pounding each other like they were presenting a legit fight. Miz landed left hand jabs, but Morrison kicked him away and landed an uppercut. They settled into a "regular" wrestling match. They went up top and Miz landed a cross body splash in mid-air. Both men writhed on the mat, then Striker led Big Daddy V to the ring. V just walked into the ring and the ref called for the bell. Miz took a Black Hole Slam from V, then V dropped Morrison with a Samoan Drop.

WINNER: No Contest in 3:00. Short match leading to the now customary ending of V standing tall having destroyed everyone. (n/a)

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