By James Caldwell, Torch columnist

ECW TV Report
October 23, 2007 in Kansas City, Mo.
Year 2, Week 20 (Week 72 overall) on Sci-Fi

The show started with The Miz. Oh boy. Miz walked out in street clothes with Extreme Expose and they entered the ring ahead of Miz. Styles and Tazz recapped Viscera's destruction of Miz and Morrison last week. Miz then took the mic and said ECW fans have an important choice to make this week on who to face Punk at the PPV. Miz said Big Daddy V isn't getting votes on look. He said Morrison is a fruitcake based on his entrance. Miz reminded us that he is the last choice. Kelly Kelly wasn't very impressed with Miz, while Leyla and Brooke were all over him. Miz then addressed Kelly, who went out on a date with Balls Mahoney last week. Miz reminded Kelly that he is her pimp, and she violated her contract by dating Balls. He said he could fire her on the spot, but he's a nice guy, so he's just going to teach her a lesson. He's going to make her life miserable week after week.

John Morrison [artist Mike Kereakos (c) PWTorch]

John Morrison had enough of the miserable promo and walked out to confront Miz. He called him a tool and said he forgot his silly hat. Morrison said there isn't an ECW fan alive who's going to vote for Miz at the PPV. He attempted to enter his poetic promo mode, then snapped back to attention when Miz interrupted. Morrison asked Kelly why he associates with a loser like Miz when she could raise her level of consciousness by associating with him. Kelly was lost. Miz then said he can sense that Kelly is dying to spend a night with him in the palace of wisdom. Kelly was irked so she slapped Morrison, leading to Balls Mahoney coming out. He shoved Morrison, but Miz met him with a kick to the back. Balls spilled to the floor, then Morrison dumped Miz over the top rope to the floor, leaving himself in the ring. C.M. Punk suddenly snuck into the ring and clotheslined Morrison to the floor. Nothing like two heels having a pissing contest with a weak stream.

[Commercial Break]

Backstage, Miz and Morrison had a screaming match. Armando Estrada stepped in and said they better start getting along because they're teaming up against Punk and Balls tonight. Morrison said they'd be fine if Miz listens to him. Miz took exception, then they continued the pissing contest.

[Q2]

1 -- BIG DADDY V (w/Matt Striker) vs. KANE

Tazz with the following line: "Kane has been extreme since extreme was cool." In any event, the match opened with V dominating Kane. V screamed at him to fight him. Kane sat up, but walked into a weak sidewalk slam. On the floor, V chucked Kane into the ring steps. They returned to the ring and mercifully cut to a break.

[Commercial Break]

Kane made his comeback after the break and the fans came to life, but Mark Henry showed up and jumped Kane. The match was thrown out. Meanwhile, Great Khali showed up and entered the ring. He gave Kane a big boot to the face. Khali had enough of V and smashed him to the floor with a big boot. Henry shoved Khali to the floor, then he dominated Kane in the corner with shoulder blocks. Henry landed forearm blows, but he slowly walked into a big boot to the face from Kane. Styles said it was like a huge pile-up of semis on I-35.

WINNER: No Contest in 7:00. If you're into a bunch of big, slow men attempting to create movement into the ring, enjoy. (1/4*)

[Commercial Break]

[Q3]

Ringside, Styles and Tazz hyped the Taker vs. Batista feud from Smackdown. Cue up the Smackdown Rebound. Styles and Tazz then plugged the PPV line-up.

Backstage, Punk and Balls talked strategy. Punk said Miz and Morrison won't be able to get along, so they just need to work together to win. Punk changed subjects and asked how the date with Kelly went. He said no one else is around, so he can tell him. And no one is watching the show either, so we can cancel out the argument of Balls spilling the beans on national TV. In any event, Balls started giggling like a drunk Cheshire cat, then Punk said that's disturbing. "That's what she said," Balls retorted, channeling Michael Scott. Balls walked off, still grinning, and Punk had a shocked look on his face. How about we roll tape from last night's Raw and call it a night?

[Commercial Break]

A Halloween-themed promo aired for ECW next week featuring V, Khali, Henry, and Kane. They're in a Monster Mash Battle Royale next week. Thank goodness it's not a Monster's Ball match. Well, on second thought.

2 -- ELIJAH BURKE vs. NUNZIO

Burke bailed on Nunzio last week during their tag match, so now the heels are having a match this week. Nunzio tried to shove Burke before the match, but Burke kicked him to the corner. He then smashed Nunzio head-first into the turnbuckle. Burke proceeded to work over Nunzio, who was spread eagle in the corner, practically conceding his body to further punishment. Nunzio suddenly came back with the Sicilian Slice from the corner before making a comeback with flying forearms. Burke had enough of this and lowered the knee pads for the Elijah Express knee smash in the corner. He made the cover for the win.

WINNER: Burke in 5:00. Another heel vs. heel exchange that the fans weren't particularly enthralled with. Are there any babyfaces on this brand other than Punk and Balls? Is Dreamer still around? This ECW and Smackdown "working agreement" looks like a lopsided fantasy football trade with no difference-making talent coming over from Smackdown.

It's apparently Friday, as Khali cut an incoherent promo backstage with his translator dude. Actually, he just kept screaming at him, and the translator guy just keeping nodding his head and interjecting a one-word answer every few words.

[Q4]

[Commercial Break]

Striker talked to V backstage. V said he will prove to be a dominant force.

Cue up the slow-motion hair-in-the-breeze video entrance for John Morrison. Tazz plugged the Cyber Sunday PPV, but he called it Cyberslam. Tazz officially flashing back to a better time in ECW history. The rest of the participants walked out for the tag match.

3 -- C.M. PUNK & BALLS MAHONEY vs. THE MIZ & JOHN MORRISON

The heels worked over Balls in the opening minutes.

[Q5 -- over-run]

The heels continued to work over Balls until a hot tag was made at 7:00. Punk landed a high knee and bulldog on Morrison, then he drop kicked Miz off the apron to the floor. Punk fired up and went to the apron for a springboard splash on Morrison. Miz then accidentally clotheslined Morrison and Balls dumped Miz to the floor. Punk followed with the Go 2 Sleep on Morrison for the win.

WINNERS: Punk & Balls in 8:00. Standard TV tag match. Not too exciting with Balls selling for six minutes, and not nearly the quality build-up to Raw's big title match at the PPV. Then again, it's Miz, Morrison, or V against Michaels, Hardy, or Kennedy. No real comparison there. (*)

We welcome your 1-10 score and comments on this show for an "ECW Reax" feature in the Torch Feedback section of PWTorch.com. To contribute your thoughts on ECW TV, click here.

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