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PARKS' WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 12/12: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage of the show, including HHH vs. Jeff Hardy

Dec 12, 2008 - 9:00:03 PM
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By Greg Parks, PWTorch Contributor

WWE Smackdown review
December 12, 2008
Taped 12/9/08 in Bridgeport, Conn.
Aired on MyNetwork TV
Report by Greg Parks, Torch Team Contributor



-WWE Open.

-Cold open to Jeff Hardy attacking Triple H during his entrance. Yeah, like they’d open the show without Triple H’s full entrance. Vickie argued with Chavo on the top of the stage to go out and break things up. Chavo was reluctant, and with good reason: Triple H decked him. They continued fighting at ringside until referees and Dean Malenko came down to break it up. A ref bumped into Vickie, who had come down to ringside, and she fell to the ground. There’s another two months in a wheelchair. Once the two were separated Vickie gave them a dressing-down. But they still went after each other. I guess this was going to be just a HHH interview segment, as they kept referencing the match being the “main event” tonight.

[Commercial Break]

-Highlights of what opened the show aired, including Vickie taking a bump. JR said we’d still get the match tonight.

1- MVP vs. R-TRUTH

Truth is coming off a loss to Dolph Ziggler on Monday, and MVP lost to Charlie Haas the same night. Hard to say which is worse. MVP got a overhead throw, then tripped Truth up and sent him face-first into the mat. Chin-lock less than two minutes in, so this one isn’t going long. There were some light “MVP” chants from the crowd as Montel Vontavious Porter continued his offensive onslaught. Camel Clutch by MVP. Truth worked himself out of it and fought out of the corner. MVP slammed Truth down after Porter looked confused about what he was going to do when he caught Truth on a cross-body attempt. MVP made several re-adjustments before turning it into a kind-of side slam. Truth, out of nowhere, rolled MVP up for the win.

WINNER: Truth, at 3:41. Most of the wins coming against MVP now are fluky types, like roll-up, as opposed to early in his losing streak when he was losing clean. So it looks like the bulk of his punishment is over.

MVP, angry, got on the mic and scolded the fans for cheering his losing. MVP said it’s supposed to be the happiest time of the year, but at least he’s still better than the fans. Mr. Kennedy’s music interrupted him. The mic fell down to Kennedy as usual on the ramp and said he felt bad for MVP. Kennedy said he wished he could do something to put a smile on MVP’s face. MVP’s mic appeared to quit working. Cheap plug for the movie and he said he was sending a message of holiday cheer from Misterrrrrrr Kennnnnneedddddy. Kennedy.

-Tonight on the Cutting Edge, Matt Hardy is the guest.

[Commercial Break]

-They showed the exterior of the Arena at Harbor Yard in Bridgeport. I’ve always liked that arena name.

-A recap of the Slammys from Raw aired.....then the video feed went all weird and we got a vignette for a new superstar (I’m assuming). It was a close-up on his face with dark stone in the background as the man discussed evil and a prophecy that will be realized. No name given.

-The Bella Twins were preening backstage when The Brian Kendrick walked up to them. They were put off by him walking up to them. Carlito and Primo asked if there was a problem and the girls said Kendrick was hitting on them. Kendrick backed down. They were near Vickie’s office, when Ezekiel Jackson walked out and asked if there was a problem. The four faced off and Kendrick said he’d see Primo in the ring. Primo and Carlito argued about Carlito not saying anything during the confrontation.

[Commercial Break]

-The tag team of the year Slammy award and presentation was shown.

2- PRIMO COLON vs. THE BRIAN KENDRICK

Quick take-down by Primo. Kendrick came back with an arm-drag, but took too much time celebrating and Primo got in an arm-drag of his own. High-energy offense from Primo as Kendrick got into the ropes to break his momentum. Kendrick ran around ringside and hid behind Zeke. Back-heel kick by Kendrick and Primo was sent out of the ring. Zeke was about to put his hands on Primo when Carlito appeared around the other side to even things up. Tazz kept talking about how “bizarre” Kendrick is. The Brian choked Primo in the ropes. Modified Camel Clutch applied by Kendrick for the second time. Kendrick missed a high knee in the corner and Primo started his comeback with some left hands. Crowd was really behind Colon in this match. Springboard cross-body from Primo got two. Primo went to the top, but Zeke got on the apron. Carlito put a stop to that but Zeke pushed him right into the steel steps. Primo was distracted by this entire sequence, and was kicked by Kendrick as soon as he came through the ropes and back into the ring, then was rolled up by Kendrick for the pinfall.

WINNER: Kendrick, at 7:30. Surprised they got this much time. Not a bad match, with some unique moves used.

-They showed what happened at the outset of the show again and then plugged Hardy vs. HH for later in the show.

[Commercial Break]

-Another DX holiday commercial aired. This time around, they plugged their hooded sweatshirt and the t-shirt. Shawn made a bad pun while introducing HHH’s King of Kings bear and then Trips showed off the HBK “Village People” bear- he said it was so authentic, you could push a button and all the hair would fall out. OK, that’s kinda funny.

3- HURRICANE HELMS vs. SHELTON BENJAMIN

Hurricane was “already in the ring.” Not a good development for his second week back. Shelton and Hurricane traded offense, with Helms hitting a Blockbuster on Shelton, but Benjamin dropkicked Helms out of the air as Hurricane came off the top rope. Outside the ring, Shelton threw Helms into the guardrail. Benjamin worked over the recently repaired neck of Helms. Swinging neckbreaker by Benjamin for two. Benjamin put Helms in a cross arm-breaker, putting his foot right in the throat of Helms. Kind of like the Hell’s Gate. Couple clotheslines by Helms, but he missed the Shining Wizard. Inverted back-breaker by Shelton for two. A Gerald Brisco roll-up, as called by JR, got Helms a two-count. Helms to the top, he hit a relatively ugly cross-body for three.

WINNER: Helms, at 4:49. Well, Helms won in the Battle of the Carolinas. As expected, he was a little better this week. Why they didn’t show vignettes or do a story of him recovering from his long neck injury, I’ll never understand, especially since the demographics of those viewing have changed (or at least, those that WWE is catering to).

Tazz got in the ring and asked Helms how it felt to be back. Helms said he thinks it’s time for a new United States champion.

-Next, The Cutting Edge will feature Matt Hardy as guest.

[Commercial Break]

-Edge was in the ring for his Cutting Edge segment. Must be a loaded show, they’re really cutting down on the entrances tonight. Edge said it looked like his opponents for Sunday are spoilin’ for a fight (my words, not his). Edge then accused Triple H of attacking Hardy in that hotel stairwell the morning of Survivor Series. Edge noted that everyone, including his guest tonight, is pointing the finger at him. Then he introduced Matt. Once he sat down, Matt once again said it was Edge that attacked Jeff in the stairwell. Edge got angry about Matt’s accusation and denied it. Matt said he knows better than anyone that Edge is the scummiest man on the face of the earth. Edge said tons of people in the company want Jeff out of the company. Edge said all the facts and evidence pointed to Triple H, while Matt turned the tables by saying all the facts pointed to Edge. Edge said the only reason Matt is involved in Jeff’s business is because no one cares about him. Well, it’s kinda true. Edge basically said no one would care of it was Matt that was attacked before the PPV. Matt looked a bit shocked and dejected and of course the crowd was there to rescue him with “Hardy” chants. Matt the decked Edge, who fell off his chair. That brought Vladimir Kozlov out. Kozlov kicked Matt right in the chest as Edge high-tailed it. Headbutts to the chest of Matt. Chokeslam-like maneuver from Kozlov, who then shouted at Matt.

-Triple H vs. Jeff Hardy is still to come tonight.

[Commercial Break]

-They aired the Slammy Award for Damn Moment of the Year.

4- GREAT KHALI vs. ZACK RYDER & CURT HAWKINS

Ryder & Hawkins have generic tights now. Hawkins tried to distract Khali, then both men went after him. Naturally, that had little effect. Hawkins was thrown over the top rope while Khali slaughtered Ryder in the corner. Khali caught Ryder coming off the top with a choke, then brain-chopped Hawkins. He then chokeslammed Ryder onto Hawkins and registered the pin.

WINNER: Khali, at 1:19. Well, it was what it was.

-Eve interviewed Triple H backstage. She asked for his response to Edge’s thought that HHH attacked Jeff. Triple H said it’s not just Edge that thinks that, but also Jeff. He called Jeff not even a big enough blip on his radar to get attacked. He said he doesn’t car who jumped Jeff but now he’s put himself in his path and he’ll run him down. HHH said he doesn’t care if Jeff shows up or not because he’ll still walk out as champion.

[Commercial Break]

5- THE BELLA TWINS vs. MARYSE & NATALYA

I guess Natalya found a new partner to fight the juggernaut that is the Bella Twins. Nikki and Maryse traded waist-locks, then Maryse slapped Nikki. Nikki got aggressive and Maryse found her way into the ropes. Tag made to Natalya, who ran right into drop toe-hold. Natalya just threw Brie over her head in a nice power move. Back-breaker by Maryse after a tag got two. She just toyed with Brie in the ring. Natalya tagged herself in but missed an elbow that led to Nikki coming back in. Maryse got kicked off the apron by Brie when she went for interference, and Nikki got caught by Natalya coming off the middle rope. Brie came in and dropkicked her sister in the back, knocking Natalya on her back and allowing the Bellas to pick up the win.

WINNERS: Bellas, at 4:49. The finish totally buried Natalya, as she had to sell Nikki falling on her for way longer than she should’ve. Not a very entertaining match.

-Eve interviewed Vladimir Kozlov, who said he doesn’t care who wins the triple-threat match for the WWE Title, he plans on beating them and becoming champion.

-Triple H vs. Jeff Hardy is coming up next.

[Commercial Break]

-Tazz and JR previewed the Armageddon card. I will be there live but, unfortunately, am underwhelmed by the card. The top three are fine, but the undercard stinks.

-Earlier tonight, Jeff Hardy attacked Triple H at ringside.

-Triple H came out for the main event, which will take place next.

[Commercial Break]

6- TRIPLE H vs. JEFF HARDY

No face-paint for Jeff here. He does have a pink belt that matches his hair though. The match immediately went to the outside, where Jeff took Trips head-first into the barricade. Back in the ring, HHH went back on the attack. Jeff hit a low dropkick and HHH was sent to the outside. Then he went off the apron and barely got The Game. Both men sold it. Jeff threw Triple H into the steel steps. Jeff flung himself off the steps and onto Trips, who fell back and hit the barricade. Both men were down again. Apparently, Scott Armstrong is giving a slow ten-count on the outside. Back in the ring, Triple H clotheslined Hardy and again both men were on the mat.

[Commercial Break]

Hardy got whipped into the buckle out of break. Another hard whip into the buckle and The Game got two on a pin attempt. Jeff came back and clotheslined Trips over the top rope. Hardy flew over the top rope and onto HHH. Trips pinned down Jeff’s arms with his knees and pounded on Jeff’s face. Good move. British Bulldog-like vertical suplex by HHH. Kneedrop for two. The match has slowed beyond a crawl to.....well, whatever is slower than a crawl. Face-buster by The Game for two. Hardy dodged some Trips offense and did register a near-fall. Hardy barely nicked Trips with his reverse mule kick. Hardy snuck out of a Pedigree and Hardy hit Whisper in the Wind. After a short delay, Hardy went for a cover and got two. Front suplex by Hardy. He went to the top for a Swanton, but Triple H made it to his feet. Hardy missed a shoulder to the gut and Trips went for a Pedigree, but Hardy got out of it again. Hardy put him on his back but missed a Swanton. Edge then interfered and speared both Hardy and Triple H.

WINNER: Double DQ, at 16:52. Well, you knew they wouldn’t give much away with the triple-threat match coming up Sunday, but this match was especially slow and boring. Nothing we haven’t seen before from these two.

What was your opinion of tonight’s show? Share your thoughts below in our new instant reader comment section!

Greg Parks has been covering Smackdown for PWTorch.com since January of 2007. You can also hear him every-other-week in the post-Raw audio show Monday nights in the Torch VIP audio section. Check out his column each week in the PDF-exclusive version of the Torch Newsletter. Comments, questions and feedback is welcome, and can be sent to g_man9784@yahoo.com.


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