By Wade Keller, PWTorch editor

KELLER'S WWE RAW REPORT
FEBRUARY 23, 2009
LIVE ON USA NETWORK

[Q1]

-A recap aired of last week's Randy Orton-McMahons angle. Apparently someone was fond, rather than embarrassed, by Triple H's cartoon huffing and puffing that closed last week's show as the vignette ended with a close-up of that in slo-mo.

-Vickie Guerrero opened the show mid-ring, exclaiming "Excuse me! Excuse me!" She said due to the unfortunate incident last week, she has been named the interim G.M. of Raw. As the crowd booed, she smiled and thanked them for their support. She assured the McMahons and the fans that she will carry out her duties with the same care and dedication as she has done on Smackdown. John Cena's music interrupted. Cena entered the ring and said he couldn't believe they chose her. He said they could have brought Mike Adamle back because it was funny when he screwed up on live TV. He said they could have hired from within, such as that loser Michael Cole. They showed Cole laughing as Cena mocked him. He said he would have 100 people higher on his list, but he can't fight city hall, so he welcomed her. He asked her to "have pride in the product and don't lie to all of us." He said we all know she doesn't care about the McMahons or the fans or anyone other than her husband.

Cena said since she is general manager now, he wanted to be sure she realizes he has a rematch clause, "and, boss, I'm going to cash it in tonight." Vickie shook her head no. Edge walked out onto the stage followed by The Big Show. Edge asked, "Who do you think you are? You think you can come out here and threaten and intimidate my wife to get what you want? Who do you think you are? Randy Orton?" Cena asked him for once in his life to stand up and be a man. He said the match is going to happen "and you have no reason and no excuse for you not to defend that World Heavyweight Championship here tonight."

Edge said, "Actually I do, because I don't answer to you." Edge said he feels sorry for him because he wants to be this generation's Bruno Sammartino, Hulk Hogan, or "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. (No Bret Hart in that list? Interesting exclusion.) He said he wants to be looked up to by every working stiff or loser kid. He said the problem is he exists in the same era as him, and he happens to be smarter and tougher than anyone who has held that title before. "While I exist, you can never be that guy you and all those people want you to be," he said. "In the grand scheme of things, that's a shame." He said people everywhere are getting divorced, losing jobs, and failing tests at a higher rate than ever, he's that shining light, that beacon of hope they all cling to.

Edge said when they do have the rematch and when he does beat him, these people will be left with absolutely nothing. The crowd chanted "Cena, Cena." Cena said Edge is standing in the ring with a barbaric, disgusting, 400 pound beast. Vickie looked over at Big Show. Cena added, "And of course you brought the Big Show out, too." That was mean, but also delivered well with Vickie putting it over. Somehow that seemed much less prickish than when Triple H did it, because the insult was part of an actual joke that was actually funny and not just totally mean-spirited and based on thinking all women should look like stripper types. Cena told Vickie to step up and do the right thing.

Big Show stepped up and told Cena to show some respect for his general manager. Cena said he doesn't get why he's in the ring. He gets Vickie and Edge being there, but "where do you fit in?" Cena then said, "Oh, yeah, you were hired to take care of Vickie Guerrero. Wow, Edge, I didn't think you were that much of a slouch in the bedroom." Cena asked if they smell like a hockey locker room. Vickie stepped in and said Edge is her family, Big Show is her friend, and Cena is neither. "You're my subordinate," she said. "And I've just made the decision to put you in action tonight. It'll either be against my friend or my family," she said. Cena said the Board of Directors made the right decision putting her in charge. Cena said he'll either be slaying a giant or walking out as the new heavyweight champion.

[Q2]

-Michael Cole finally spoke and said Vickie holds all the cards. Jerry Lawler wondered whether it'd be friend or family. Cole announced the C.M. Punk vs. Miz vs. John Morrison match to qualify for the Ladder in the Match match.

-A black sedan pulled up in the parking garage and out walked Ted DiBiase, Cody Rhodes, and Randy Orton. DiBiase and Orton grabbed their suitcases and hurried into the arena as Cody apparently parked the car. Lawler wondered if since Legacy has arrived, if Triple H can be far behind.

[Commercial Break]

-They showed a scene inside a bar in downtown Nashville with a country band playing. The camera moved to the street and showed the arena in the background where Raw was taking place. Cole and Lawler talked about the Money in the Bank briefcase match as the showed a case hanging above the ring.

1 -- C.M. PUNK vs. THE MIZ vs. JOHN MORRISON -- MITB Qualifier

The heel duo dominated earl. Punk lifted Miz for a Go To Sleep, but Punk held onto the top rope and then dumped Miz to the floor. Morrison dove at Punk, and both tumbled over the top rope to the floor. They cut to an early break at 2:00.

[Commercial Break]

Morrison had Punk on the mat in a chinlock. No highspots or bumps shall be taken while the red light is off. Punk came back a minute later and hit a running knee in the corner. Miz charged at Punk and knocked him to the mat. He followed with stomps. Miz settled into a chinlock. Lawler said he loves the Money in the Bank ladder match each year at WrestleMania.

[Q3]

Punk escaped the chinlock, then had to fend of Morrison, too. He backdropped a charging Miz and then head scissored Morrison to the mat. He followed with a running high knee in the corner on Miz and bulldog/clothesline combo on both. He then powerslammed a charging Morrison. Miz broke up the pin attempt. Miz lifted Punk onto his shoulders, then Morrison springboard kicked Punk to the mat in a cool spot. Miz made the cover. Morrison broke it up. Cole undersold that big time, but Lawler stepped in and said, "I knew it!" Miz then tried to schoolboy Morrison. Morrison and Miz stopped and each looked up at the briefcase, then they began fighting each other all out. Miz backdropped Morrison onto the ring apron. As he tried to suplex hm back into the ring, Punk grabbed Morrison and gave him the GTS for the win.

WINNER: Punk in 10:00.

STAR RATING: ** -- Solid TV match. Not sure if it's a step up for Punk to be back in the MITB match. I'd be in favor of not allowing someone back in who won it once as it should be a way to elevate someone on the rise, not a match where former World Champs try to get a streak of wins. No big deal either way, but my preference would be only rising stars or at least not past winners are entered to keep it fresh and guarantee a new wrestler is guaranteed a title shot he might not have been in line for otherwise.

-Cole plugged that Triple H's intense interview about what Orton did to Stephanie would be up next. They showed Triple H swigging from a water bottle.

[Commercial Break]

-WWE Fact: What television show has been on cable for over 15 years and was the no. 1 show again last week? Monday Night Raw.

-They went to Cole and Lawler at ringside. They threw to the interview with Triple H that aired on Smackdown on Friday.

-They went backstage to Todd Grisham interviewing Cody and DiBiase outside of Orton's locker room. Cody said they don't like the way everything is being presented regarding Orton. Cody said Orton didn't ask to face Shane McMahon or confront Stephanie McMahon. Shane and Steph were responsible for their own actions. DiBiase said Orton won't be a prisoner on his own show. He said he'll address his actions later, and if Triple H - the last McMahon standing - does decide to show, well, they'll be ready.

-Beth Phoenix, Santino Marella, and Rosa Mendez walked down the hall. Dolph Ziggler introduced himself to them. He said he and Beth are "into lots of love." Santino said Ziggler's got great abs, but they're not as good as his, but if he weren't wearing a fancy t-shirt, he'd show him.

-USA Network is airing commercials for Duane Johnson's new movie, "Race to Witch Mountain." He referred to himself by his real name, with no reference to The Rock, but he did invite Raw viewers to wait for the preview later of his new movie.

[Commercial Break]

[Q4]

-The WWE Rewind aired, featuring clips of Melina vs. Beth Phoenix last week on Raw.

2 -- SANTINO MARELLA & BETH PHOENIX & DOLPH ZIGGLER vs. CRYME TYME & MELINA

The women wrestled at first. Then Ziggler for a while against J.T.G. and Shad. After a Shad backdrop on Ziggler, Lawler said, "When you fly that high, you usually get peanuts." Santino tagged in at 5:00 and puffed his chest out and talked big. Then Shad chokeslammed him and pinned him immediately. He smiled and laughed as Phoenix just held her head in shame.

WINNERS: Cryme Tyme & Phoenix in 5:00.

STAR RATING: 3/4*

-The showed Shawn Michaels heading toward the entrance tunnel for his match against JBL. It's amazing how underhyped this match was in the opening hour of the show.

[Commercial Break]

-A WrestleMania 25 video aired to AC/DC and then they went to a trailer for John Cena's "12 Rounds."

[Q5]

3 -- JBL vs. SHAWN MICHAELS

Cole updated viewers that the winner of this match will face Vladimir Kozlov to earn the privilege to face Undertaker at WrestleMania, and that match will air on Raw next week - making Smackdown the obvious underling of Raw right now. When Cole asked what an honor it'd be to face Undertaker at WrestleMania, Lawler uttered under his breath: "I can't even imagine wrestling at WrestleMania; it'd be nice, though." That's a sore spot with Lawler that McMahon has never booked him to actually wrestle on a WrestleMania despite keeping himself in "wrestling shape" in as much as that was necessary for his in-ring style. JBL had the early advantage. Michaels came back at 1:00 with a big chop and an armbar. JBL regained control shortly thereafter. At ringside, JBL lifted Michaels and Michaels countered sending both men head-first into the ringpost. They both barely beat the referee's ten count at 4:00.

[Commercial Break]

After the break, with Michaels sitting on the top rope, JBL kicked him in the face. Michaels tumbled to the floor. JBL controlled for a couple minutes, including an octopus abdominal stretch. Michaels made a full comeback at 10:00 and hit a top rope elbow, then stomped the mat. When Lawler said, "Don't count JBL out yet," we knew it'd be over within a minute or else he'd have said, "It's over now!" JBL did avoid the superkick and throw Michaels over the top rope. Michaels skinned the cat back in and faced a big boot from JBL. JBL shouted for him to get up. Michaels did, but he surprised a charging JBL with Sweet Chin Music for the win.

WINNER: Michaels in 11:00.

STAR RATING: ** - A bit disappointing. The match, with all of the backstory recently, felt like just a typical solid TV match, but not as monumental as it should have. It felt like a transition match to something more important, which is what it was, but it shouldn't have been so obvious. Just a couple pre-match promos with each backstage would have reset the stage nicely by reminding everyone what was at stake, with the wrestlers doing the talking instead of just Cole and Lawler. That said, the announcers did a good job really putting over what a big deal it is to face Undertaker at WrestleMania.

[Q6]

-Afterward, Vladimir Kozlov walked out and got in Michaels's face. Michaels threw the first couple punches. Kozlov brushed them off and chokeslammed Michaels. It'll be a real indicator of where Kozlov is as a worker when he faces Michaels next week. If Michaels can't get a good match out of him, he's as bad as his critics insist he is. Kozlov's facial expressions remain really good. He can get away with being a bit over-the-top and cartoonish because he has the "intimidating Russian heel look" as much as anyone ever has.

-They showed DiBiase, Cody, and Orton chatting backstage. Lawler said they are awaiting the arrival of Triple H. He wondered what would happen if Orton and Triple H stood in the same ring tonight, then said he hopes it happens tonight.

-A Smackdown commercial aired. They're hyping Jeff Hardy vs. Matt Hardy. I hope that doesn't actually happen. How short-sighted would that be to give that away on free TV? I'm assuming it'll be an angle that builds anticipation for the first match with a heel Matt vs. babyface Jeff at WrestleMania.

[Commercial Break]

-A WrestleMania Moment aired, focused on last year's, hyped as the "first-ever in high definition." Maybe some day Comcast will actually offer high-def PPVs on my system. The video package concluded with Ric Flair's retirement, which was the correct match to focus on. They also showed Money in the Bank and Big Show vs. Floyd "Money" Mayweather.

-Jamie Noble stood mid-ring with a mic. He said if he can last longer tonight against Mike Knox than the 15 seconds he lasted against Kane last week, he knows he'll be on his way to WrestleMania. As Knox walked to the ring, they panned back to a nice "beauty shot" of the big crowd in the arena.

4 -- MIKE KNOX vs. JAMIE NOBLE

They put a clock on the screen to track how long Noble lasted. Knox stopped Noble in his tracks with a big boot and finished him with his cool finisher. Cole wondered if lasting longer than 15 seconds did give Noble a slot at WrestleMania.

WINNER: Knox in 0:26. 



-Cole and Lawler threw to the latest Hall of Fame Class of 2009 inductee: Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat. The video package included clips of his match against Randy Savage at WrestleMania III. This is going to create even more unrest that Savage hasn't been inducted yet. They also showed Steamboat vs. Ric Flair in 1989 for the "prestigious NWA World Heavyweight Championship." A clip aired of Steve Austin saying he was his favorite person to get in the ring with. Flair said today he remains a humble, good guy.

-Lawler said Steamboat is in the arena tonight and they'll hear from him next.

[Commercial Break]

[Q7]

-Cole stood on the stage and introduced Steamboat. Steamboat said it is the greatest honor of his life. He said winning the IC Title was probably the greatest highlight of his career in front of 93,000 at the Silverdome, but the Hall of Fame induction may top it. He didn't quite say it as clearly as I just wrote it, reminding us of his average-at-best promos in his career. Chris Jericho mercifully interrupted. Perfect. Jericho said he also wanted to say thank you. He thanked the Academy for proving him right. He said despite his shameful pandering and kissing butts in Hollywood, Mickey Rourke was like his character in the movie, a loser who doesn't have a chance to make it again. He said Rourke reminds him of losers like Ric Flair, Roddy Piper, and Steamboat. He called Steamboat a loser.

He said Steamboat once was wrestling those classic matches with Ric Flair in the NWA, "an organization, which according to this organization, never existed. You were just Ricky Steamboat." He said it wasn't until he came to the WWE and sold his soul to the parasites in the audience that he became Ricky the Dragon, a glorified karate kid selling headbands and making poses, feeding into stereotypes. "And then you eventually came to the ring with a Kimono dragon literally spitting fire like the circus freak you became." He said it was pathetic, but as long as he was collecting a paycheck, it was okay. He said then after his career, like all the others, he was beaten down and broken down with a dysfunctional family, "and you know you would have returned to the ring, just like Flair, just like Piper, but instead you took a backdoor route and applied for a job working backstage." He called him a lifelong sellout, a loyal dog getting his bone with the HOF induction. Jericho stumbled over a line about how he wears a suit instead of a kilt or a sequined robe. He said it's worse that he wears a suit instead and he called him the biggest hypocrite of them all.

As Jericho began walking away, Steamboat asked him if he knows what a hypocrite is. He said he remembered about 20 years ago at an autograph session, he signed an autograph for him. He said he also remembered how he said he had admired him and he was his hero. "You wrote that in your autobiography, Jericho," said Steamboat, leaning in to Jericho's face. "And then about ten years ago, when you came to the WWE, you were this snotty brat wrestler of a kid that turned down the wrestling fans, and then within a year, less than a year, you embraced them. What did you call them? Jerichoholics? Then you spent the next several years, turning on them, embracing them, turning on them, embracing them. So on and so off. You know something, Jericho? That's a hypocrite. Myself, from the very first time I put on my wrestling tights to the day that I retired, I didn't change not once. I gave this audience the respect and entertained them every time I came through the curtain. I never changed, not once. Now myself, Ric Flair, Roddy Piper, and the other legends - we know who we are. And me coming back to work for WWE behind the scenes to help our young talent, our future superstars, to teach them, coach them, pass the torch, so to speak, that's not a sellout. I did it because I love this business." The crowd cheered.

Steamboat said, "I don't care what you think of me; it really doesn't matter. I'm not a hypocrite, I'm not a sellout, but I am someone you may never be - a Hall of Famer." Jericho hit him over the head with a mic and threw him into the video wall. Jericho yelled that he's a has-been, just like the rest - another sellout. He told him to stay down. Steamboat struggled to get up as Jericho smiled. Lawler said Jericho's actions were inexplicable. That was one of Steamboat's best promos. He started shaky before Jericho walked out, but really delivered. The promos each cut were just great, with Jericho making a strong case drawing from Steamboat's history, and then Steamboat shooting it down relative to Jericho's past. Really compelling segment, well executed by both.

-They went to Lawler and Cole at ringside. They first reacted with disgust to Jericho, and then threw to clips of the Cena-Vickie segment at the start of the show.

[Q8]

[Commercial Break]

-WWE Fact: "In addition to a sizeable audience of females, more males 18-49 watched Raw last week than any other show on cable or broadcast TV." That's crazy impressive, actually, considering all of the shows on TV including juggernauts like "American Idol" and "CSI." You knew with the audience surge last week, they'd have an impressive stat to deliver. They should have opened the show with that.

-They showed Lawler and Cole at ringside, who talked about the "developing story" between Orton and Triple H last week. They went to Grisham in the parking garage saying he'd let them know if and when Triple H arrived.

-John Cena made his full ring intro. Vickie walked out and said he will not be granted his championship match tonight. Cena said, "Like I didn't see that coming." He said she's testing his patience, and he can deal with that. He said he's going to follow her wherever she goes. He said he'll be on Smackdown, and if next week she returns to Raw, he'll be right there. He said they'll be seeing a lot of each other until she decides to give him a rematch. Vickie suggested he stop talking and begin concentrating on tonight. She said as she promised he'll face either a friend or a member of her family. Chavo Guerrero's music played.

5 -- JOHN CENA vs. CHAVO GUERRERO

A bit of a bait and switch as they definitely gave the impression Cena would face either Big Show or Edge in the Raw main event. Cena dominated from the start and finished Chavo with an Attitude Adjustment and an STF for a quick tapout. He shouted back at Vickie after his win as she sneered back at him with piercing eyes.

WINNER: Cena in 1:00.

-They went backstage where Cody, DiBiase, and Orton walked out of their locker room, looking around. Orton held up a sledgehammer, then headed toward the entrance tunnel.

-An ECW commercial hyped Jack Swagger vs. Christian for the ECW Championship tomorrow night.

[Commercial Break]

-Lawler plugged the "AC/DC" WrestleMania 25 theme. Cole plugged Michaels vs. Kozlov next week on Raw.

[Q9]

-Orton, Cody, and DiBiase made their way to the ring to Orton's music. Orton stepped into the ring and said he's going to wait there for Triple H to show up and avenge his wife. He said if Triple H truly is a McMahon - arrogant, out of touch, and just plan stupid - he'll do exactly that. He said he thinks his wife Stephanie is a victim, but he is wrong "because I am the victim." Orton said all he wanted to do was mind his own business and proceed in his career, but the McMahons wouldn't stay out of his way. He said Vince McMahon insulted his family weeks ago, so as he was about to fire him, he lost control and kicked him in the skull as hard as he could. "I have IED, you see," he said. "Then I beat Shane McMahon at No Way Out, but he just kept coming; he just wouldn't stop." He said when he challenged him last week, he kicked him in the head and put him in the hospital right next to his old man. He said it didn't have to go down that way, but Shane pushed him and pushed him until he shot back. "And then there's Stephanie," he said. "Triple H's wife Stephanie thinks she can do whatever she wants, whatever she pleases, because of what her last name is." He said she got in his face again and instinct took over.

He said the fans judge him, but they have no idea what he goes through. He said they have no idea what it's like to be at the top of his profession. "You despite me because I can do things you can only fantasize about. You have no idea what it's like to be famous, to be a celebrity, to be constantly scrutinized by the public, by the media." He grew red-faced and more intense. "You people have no idea the pressure that I am under! But, the McMahons do." He told Stephanie she should have known better. He said he can only hope Triple H's children were watching last week so they can learn from their mother's mistakes. The big screen showed Triple H walking toward the entrance set with a sledgehammer in hand as Grisham chased behind, begging for a moment to ask him a question. Triple H then appeared on stage to a nice pop, sans music.

Orton breathed deeply and walked toward him with his sledgehammer in hand. Triple H walked to the ring, looking like he hadn't slept in a week. Cody and DiBiase flanked Orton. Orton finally spoke. He said: "Hey, Hunter, hang on." He told him not to be stupid because somebody is going to get hurt bad, and with three of them versus one of him, his odds aren't good. He suggested they each put down the sledgehammers and "deal with this like men." Orton dropped the sledgehammer to the floor. Triple H stepped onto the ring apron and did the same. Triple H slowly stepped into the ring. After a tense few seconds that felt like minutes, Triple H took off his jacket. Orton, Cody, and DiBiase slowly moved in on Triple H, who held his ground. Triple H pulled a second sledgehammer out of from behind his jeans. The three heels fled immediately. Triple H jabbed Cody, but missed a big swing at Orton, who ran to the back with DiBiase.

Triple H pursued them backstage. They tried to get out of two doors backstage, but they were locked. They fled into a locker room and closed the door behind them. Luckily there was a cameraman back there, who filmed them building a barrier in front of the door with a table. Triple H began bashing in the door with a sledgehammer. He broke the door open and had Orton and DiBiase cornered in the room. He swung the sledgehammer at them. They ducked. He jabbed DiBiase with it in the back, then backed down Orton. Triple H swung it at a mirror. Orton ducked and fled out of the door, followed by DIBiase. Triple H chased them down the hallway. The fled out a back door as Triple H chased after them. As they got into their car, he broke a side window with the sledgehammer and then threw it at the car as it drove away. The show closed with Triple H huffing and puffing in anger.

Really, really good finish to Raw. The backstage chase was really well done (except for that camera that just happened to be in the room Orton and DiBiase locked themselves in, but it hardly ruined the segment) and dramatic. Even before that, though, Orton was superb on the mic. He is just as good a heel on the mic right now as I've seen in years, and that's saying something because Edge and Jericho are really on their game right now. Orton has really come a long way because it was just two or three years ago that he was pretty bland on promos. It was also a dramatic touch to have Triple H come out and not have his music play. That difference was enough to really set the segment apart as something different than standard hype. Again, really good segment and strong WrestleMania-level angle.

-USA Network aired a preview of "Race To Witch Mountain." Duane Johnson introduced himself as: "Duane 'Uncle Handsome' Johnson." It is released in theaters on March 13.

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