KELLER'S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 9/3: Cody Rhodes verbally destroys Matt Hardy, Kane shakes Undertaker's confidence, Del Rio has a fiesta
Sep 4, 2010 - 12:13:38 AM
By Wade Keller, PWTorch editor
KELLER'S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT
SEPTEMBER 3, 2010
TAPED TUESDAY IN ALBANY, N.Y.
AIRED LIVE ON MY NETWORK TV
[Q1]
-After a video package aired on the Kane-Undertaker feud, Todd Grisham and Matt Striker introduced the show.
-Alberto Del Rio's was introduced by his personal ring announcer. He said he was celebrating breaking Rey Mysterio's wrist last week. A video recap aired. He said he was throwing a fiesta to mark the end of Rey's time in WWE. He said Rey was an embarrassment to his people and ashamed of his heritage. He said Rey was like a donkey, then he destroyed a piñata with a Mysterio mask on. He held a glass of champaign and said everyone should toast him.
Christian interrupted. He exchanged insults with Del Rio, including calling him Juan Bradshaw Layfield. He said he didn't like that he injured his friend. Christian said if he wants a fight, he has no trouble making that happen in front of his peeps. Del Rio told his men to leave the ring. He got in Christian's face and asked if he's sure he wants to do this. But then he backed off, smiled, and said there will be another place and another time. He said he will pay for it. Striker said you don't challenge someone of Del Rio's class, he challenged you. As Del Rio left the ring, Drew McIntrye attacked Christian from behind. Del Rio kneeled over Christian at ringside and poured a beverage on him. Grisham wondered if Christian would be ready to face Drew next.
[Q2] [c]
1 -- CHRISTIAN vs. DREW MCINTYRE
The ref asked Christian if he was sure he could wrestle. Christian insisted he could. Drew took early control against Christian. At 3:00 Christian caught Drew with a boot to the face as he leaped off the top rope to reverse momentum. They brawled to ringside. Drew tried to drag Christian onto the announce table, but Christian tripped Drew back-first onto the table instead. They both reentered the ring before the ref reached the tenth count. Christian set up the Kill Switch, but McIntyre countered into a stomach buster. Christian surprised Drew seconds later with a jackknife for the win.
WINNER: Christian in 5:00.
STAR RATING: *1/4 -- Good five minute TV match.
-Grisham hyped Big Show vs. C.M. Punk & Luke Gallows for later in the show. [c]
[Q3]
2 -- MICHELLE MCCOOL (w/Layla) vs. KELLY KELLY
Layla joined Grisham and Striker on commentary. Grisham asked whether it'd be her or Michelle facing Kelly at Night of the Champions. She said it'll be LayCool either way. Grisham asked why she calls Kelly "Smelly Kelly." Layla said she is smelly. "I have to throw up every time in a match with Kelly kelly," she said. Layla said Fabulous Moolah and Trish Stratus can't claim to be unified women's champions. McCool finished Kelly with the Faith Breaker (Styles Clash). Layla joined McCool in the ring for a celebration. Grisham said she's like a "verbal hurricane."
WINNER: McCool in 2:00. [c]
-The video package aired of WWE visiting China, with Cena saying the fans are very respectful and it's a pleasure to wrestle for them.
-Backstage a doctor connected strange electrodes to Hornswoggle's temples. G.M. Teddy Long asked what was going on. The doctor said he's tried all of the traditional methods to get Mr. Swoggle to speak English, such as phonics and ink blots and even "See and Say." Hornswoggle threw them all aside. Long asked what he recommends. The doc said in extreme cases it can require extreme measures, such as electroshock therapy. Hornswoggle protested. Long said this will be for his own good and to trust him. He told him to relax. Hornswoggle reluctantly agreed. The doc told him to "get ready to be jolted into literacy." Hornswoggle squealed. Long told him to be careful. The doc said he was going for full power. Hornswoggle put the electrodes on the doc and turned it up to full power. The doc roasted and made odd faces. [c]
[Q4]
-Vickie Guerrero stepped onto the stage and told everyone to settle down and show proper respect to her boyfriend and Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler. As Ziggler walked out, clips aired of last week's Ziggler vs. Kofi Kingston match with Ziggler getting intentionally counted out.
3 -- DOLPH ZIGGLER (w/Vickie Guerrero) vs. CHRIS MASTERS
Masters tried to apply the Masterlock at 2:00, but Ziggler pushed off the ropes with his legs and executed a Zig Zag for the win. The Zig Zag barely aught Masters's back.
WINNER: Ziggler in 2:00.
-They showed Show heading toward the entrance tunnel. [c]
-A commercial aired hyping that The Nexus would come to Washington D.C. on Monday's Raw.
-Ring intros took place for the two-on-one match.
[Q5]
4 -- THE BIG SHOW vs. C.M. PUNK & LUKE GALLOWS (w/Mercury)
Show dominated Gallows in the opening minute. When Gallows regrouped with Mercury at ringside, Show pursued them. He applied a nerve pinch on Mercury. Punk slidekicked Show from inside the ring, then punched away at him at ringside. Gallows jumped Show from ringside to stop his comeback at 3:00. Show charged at Punk at ringside, but Punk moved and Show collided with the steps. [c]
Back from the break, Punk had Show down and then tagged in Gallows. Show finished Gallows quickly with a flapjack out of a powerbomb and then a tapout to an upperbody chinlock.
WINNER: Show in 10:00.
STAR RATING: * -- Basic stuff, but fine. It doesn't do a lot for Punk to be on the losing team of handicapped matches, considering he's a former main eventer and World Champion.
[Q6] [c]
-MVP Lounge with guest host Jack Swagger. Swagger earned the right to guest host the Lounge thanks to MVP getting himself DQ's in last week's takedown competition. Swagger's guest was his father, who was in a wheelchair with a neck brace on. He bragged up his son for his record for consecutive push-ups at the elementary school talent show at age 9. He asked Jack to do push-ups for him again. Swagger got to 46 and Swagger began to get tired. MVP's music interrupted before he collapsed, though. MVP jaunted to the ring. "How sweet," he said. "Look at this Hallmark moment. A boy and his father, looking like two squares making complete fools of themselves." MVP said the MVP Lounge is supposed to be ballin' with women dancing and music playing. MVP began tossing over parts of the set, saying it wasn't worthy of the Lounge. Swagger hid behind his dad and used the wheelchair to shove MVP away, jerking his father around in the process. Hilarious. They had a tug-o-war with the wheelchair. Swagger shoved his father out of his wheelchair and onto MVP. MVP then ducked a charging Swagger, who flew over the top rope to the floor. MVP then delivered his elbow drop onto Swagger Sr. He threw the wheelchair at Swagger Jr. at ringside. [c]
[Q7]
-WWE Fact: As if we didn't get enough on Monday night, more bragging about the 900 episodes of Raw.
5 -- MATT HARDY vs. CODY RHODES
Hardy limped to the ring on his damaged ankle. Cody Rhodes came out and taunted Hardy as he walked to the ring. He said Hardy clearly hasn't been paying attention to his grooming tips. Cody said those tips aren't for him "because I'm going to be alright." He said those tips are for people like the fans. He pointed to a random fan and called him "fatso." He asked him if he ever thought to get his nose fixed. He questioned his partial beard with just patches. Plus he noticed a crop circle. Cody said, "You've been doing a Hardy amount of eating lately; I can see that." He said he heard someone has a flat tire and he knows someone who has a spare. Cody held up a mirror and asked Matt to look at it. Cody asked if he sees the Matt Hardy who revolutionized the TLC match or the Hardy who grew up wanting to be World Champion or the Matt Hardy V1. "No, all I see is Matt Hardy, Version Done." That was harsh. Not untrue, but harsh. I bet that tough for Hardy to listen to, storyline or not. Striker said Hardy can't get to the gym because he has several injuries. Uh, he's in a wrestling match. If he can't do any cardio, does he really belong in the ring, storyline-wise or in real-life? So the match begins with Hardy taking out his anger on Cody with an aggressive early attack. A minute into the attack, with Cody recovering at ringside, they cut to a break. [c]
Hardy looks so bad aesthetically now that Striker said, "Hardy shows it's not what you look like but what you can do." Hardy continued on offense afterward with a single-leg crab on Cody. Grisham said Cody's claim to fame lately is his legs are smoother than any woman's. Hardy continued to sell his ankle injury and Rhodes pinned him with Crossroads.
WINNER: Rhodes in 7:00. Not much aired, but it wasn't great. Hardy really looks like he should not be on the road at this point. Whatever is wrong with him needs fixing.
-Grisham hyped a major announcement from Kane next. [c]
[Q8]
-Kane maniacally laughed as his entrance music played. Kane stood in a room lit by candles. He said the end of his brother's very existence will come at Night of the Champions. He said that night he will defend his World Title against Undertaker. He said it will be the crowning moment of his entire life. He said unlike Taker, he recognizes his vices. He said he has wanted Taker's powers more than he could ever know. He said now they will become his. The Druids brought a casket to the ring. Once it reached the ring, Kane popped out of it. He laughed maniacally. He rolled into the ring laughing, saying he wishes he could see the look on his brother's face right now as he finally realizes there is nothing he can do to stop him. He said Undertaker now walks in his shadow. He said he is the younger one, the second chose, the afterthought. "My how things change," he said. When he looks at Taker now, he says all he sees is weakness.
A clip aired of Kane beating on Taker last week. He said his powers are now gone and they belong to him. He said when their saga is over, the Undertaker will be no more and the man once known as The Phenom will become a memory. known as Kane's Brother. He said at Night of Champions he will feel his range and there is nothing he can do about it. He said he will be powerless to stop him. Kane deserves consideration for the Best Promos award this year. I know there are cartoonish supernatural aspects of his character that isn't for everyone, but he has really hit his stride with a renewed dedication to his character this summer. He is believable as a crazed jealous insane younger brother with deep problems.
Undertaker's music played and he walked out. He took off his hood and robe and walked slowly to the ring. His eyes rolled back into the whites and entered the ring. The ring went dark. When the lights came back on three seconds later, Kane was gone. Taker looked a little nervous that Kane was displaying superpowers. He looked over at the red casket, then cautiously approached it. He lifted the lid, but it was empty. Kane's laughter returned and he appeared on the big screen. Kane said Taker may not have taught him everything he knows about evil, but he's wrong in assuming he has anything left to learn. He said they are called the Brothers of Destruction, but after Night of Champions, Taker will be known as the brother he destroyed. He laughed and Taker looked concerned as the show ended.
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