Thank you for joining me as we put Raw "Under The Microscope." This is not a complete recap of Monday's show. Instead, this is simply a closer look at the broadcast.

It's not you, it's me

An early contender for quote of the night also brings up a question. Who said the following words? "Just because we can't touch doesn't mean we can't talk."

Was it (a) Me, to my college girlfriend after she broke up with me or (b) Randy Orton, in an unfortunately worded invitation to confront Dave Batista in front of a televised audience?

This tender moment was brought to you by RKO Industries and Hallmark.

Can I be Paul Roma this time?

During Orton's discussion with Batista, he made an understandable reference to another classic wrestling stable as he compared Legacy with the Four Horsemen and tossed in a mention of Evolution for good measure. Orton took the role of Ric Flair as the man who holds the gold and gave Batista the opportunity to serve as "The Enforcer" just as Arn Anderson did for so many years. Orton insisted that "Double A" stood by Flair's side for ten years and was his "right hand man."

Although the Horsemen timeline extends from 1986-1999, Orton's estimate of ten years could be accurate as the crew did not work throughout the time, breaking up for various reasons, including Tully Blanchard and Anderson jumping to the WWF, Flair later taking the same path, and Anderson's eventual retirement. Although he was known as "The Enforcer" for much of his time as a Horseman, he started his career as "Super Olympia" in Southeastern Championship Wrestling.

Although Flair and Anderson served in the group for the longest time, the list of Horsemen includes Ole Anderson and Blanchard as original members, to be followed by wrestlers such as Lex Luger, Barry Windham, Sting, Sid Vicious, Brian Pillman, Chris Benoit, Steve McMichael, Curt Hennig, Dean Malenko, and Paul Roma. One other person affiliated with The Horsemen is still on the WWE roster. Referee Charles Robinson was an ally to the stable back in 1999 going as far as being called "Little Naitch" as he tried to emulate "The Nature Boy."

Lemmy Bless You

The sign of the night goes to the fan proclaiming that "Lemmy is God." Most people know Lemmy as the man with the rough voice on the Motorhead songs and you hear him any time Triple H walks to the ring. Motorhead also provided the theme song for Evolution and non-wrestling fans would recognize him from songs like "Ace of Spades."

Apparently this fan isn't the only one to hold Lemmy in such high regard. In the movie Airheads, Brendan Fraser's character is talking to an undercover police officer who is pretending to work for a record company. Fraser asks "Who'd win in a wrestling match, Lemmy or God?" The police officer replies, "Lemmy," and Steve Buscemi's character "buzzes" him forcing the officer to quickly change his answer to "God." Buscemi corrects him by insisting that it's a trick question, "Lemmy is God."

Beavis and Butthead also gave Lemmy their personal seal of approval by announcing that "He's Lemmy. He can be in any damn video he wants to." The man with such loyal fans was actually born Ian Fraser Kilmister on Christmas Eve in 1945.

Step one: Cut a hole in the box

I appreciate any sign of long-term planning, so I enjoyed The Brian Kendrick announcing that his victory over Carlito was only step one. He went on to assert that step two would involve finding a new partner. Assuming that the person is already on the Raw roster and not actively involved in another storyline, his choices appear to be Jamie Noble, Goldust, or Festus. Noble would compliment Kendrick in size and talent, although Festus would provide a similar dynamic Kendrick had with Ezekiel Jackson with the big man/little man combination. Although I don't think they would pull The Miz back into a tag team role, he does share a common appreciation for declarative words in naming. The Miz and The Brian Kendrick are The Tag Team Champs?

Who should Kendrick team with? Step one: leave your comments below.

And your references stink too

The Miz continued his assault on John Cena's resume by comparing Monday's exhibition with his recent movie "12 Rounds." The big difference in The Miz's opinion was that unlike "12 Rounds," someone would actually see this. In Cena's defense, the movie has brought in $12,003,369 in the United States. The average movie ticket costs $10, so at least 1,200,336.9 people saw his movie. I'm not sure if the 0.9 person had to pay full price.

He also added that Cena's "rap albums sucked too." Cena performed "Basic Thugonomics," which was featured on the WWE album "WWE Originals" and recorded the single "Untouchables" for "WWE ThemeAddict: The Music, Vol. 6." His debut album "You Can't See Me" topped out at #15 on the Billboard 200 chart, #10 on the Top R & B/Hip-Hop Albums, #3 on the U.S. Rap list, and #103 on the U.K. Albums Chart.

Yes, I called them albums. I'm old.

Sorry, did you say something?

I detected more than a hint of heel announcer in Jerry Lawler on Monday, specifically in the tag match involving Matt Hardy. When Hardy bailed because of his broken hand, he didn't give Kofi Kingston and MVP much credit, insisting that it was basically a two-on-one match at that point.

It's possible that he was just in a bad mood after a certain exchange with Michael Cole. Lawler was defending Hardy's claim that he shouldn't have to wrestler by reminding the viewers that when he had broken his hand and he couldn't compete, he called the official and said may hand was broken and they didn't force me out there to compete. Cole immediately asked Lawler if he wrestled under protest.

According to livestrong.com, you can improve your listening skills by being mentally and physically prepared to listen. Think about the topic in advance, if possible and put other thoughts out of your mind. Your attention will be diverted from listening if you try to think of answers in advance.

Ice? No, straight up will be fine

MVP and William Regal provided an interesting contrast in speaking styles as the two argued. Regal insisted that as the former General Manager and King of the Ring, he shouldn't have been passed over by recent draft picks for the opening of the show. MVP countered that while everyone else was "straight up ballin,'" Regal was just "straight up boring." That may be true about Regal, but not everyone is ballin'.

This guy is straight up bowlin'.



Lee Stevens examines Raw and Smackdown with "Under The Microscope." You can leave comments below or e-mail him at GLStevens.Torch@gmail.com

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