By Wade Keller, Torch editor

NWA-TNA PPV
MAY 21, 2003
LIVE FROM NASHVILLE, TENN.

-A recap aired of last week's faction warfare. Then a creative montage aired based on the Star Wars opening with graphics for SEX, Extreme Revolution, New Church, and NWA. Then Mike Tenay talked about the faction battles.

-Raven sat on the edge of a trailer rooftop complaining about being denied his destiny two weeks ago when he didn't win the NWA Title. He began talking, including this gem: "Remember, no one jerks off in Nashville without Jeff Jarrett owning part of his fist." He accused Jeff Jarrett of sitting at home milking his injury. He followed up with: "While Jeff Jarrett sits at home milking his injury, all I hear in my head is the voice of Mike Tenay sounding like shit being sucked down a drain pipe proclaiming that Jeff Jarrett is the NWA..." Then he got attacked from behind and a few seconds later we heard Jarrett's voice. "Hey Raven, I knew you'd come looking for me tonight, so I thought I'd first pay you a visit!"

-Mike Tenay introduced the show as the camera panned the crowd. Highlights aired of Chris Sabin beating Amazing Red for the X Title in the three-way match with Jerry Lynn last week followed by Sabin joining SEX.

1 -- C.M. PUNK vs. JASON CROSS vs. KID ROMEO vs. PAUL LONDON - Elimination Match to Earn X Title Shot

Punk wanted to shake hands with Romeo, but Romeo just did a Rick Rude style hip swivel instead. Tenay talked about the Jarrett attack on Raven, saying NWA officials can't be happy with Jarrett's attack on Raven. Tenay talked about Romeo's experience in Puerto Rico and Japan. London back suplexed Punk, but Punk landed on his feet and then launched off of London into Romeo. Punk then knocked London off the top rope to the floor. Romeo then went after Punk. Punk fought back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Cross re-entered the ring and kicked Punk and scored a two count. Punk came back and gave Cross the Devil Lock DDT for a two count. Cross put Punk away with the Crossover Neckbreaker off the ropes at 5:05. London kicked Cross as had London held in the air. Romeo clotheslined London over the top rope. Romeo then dove onto London at ringside. In the ring Cross regained his feet and flew onto both London and Romeo with a twisting dive. He then showed enthusiastic fire to get the crowd into it. He followed by slingshotting into the ring with a head scissors onto Romeo for a two count. When Romeo climbed to the top rope, Cross knocked him off balance. When Cross set up a top rope huracanrana, Romeo low-blowed Cross and gave him his finisher off the top rope called The Kiss Goodnight at 8:15. That left London vs. Romeo. Romeo shoved the ref into the ropes to knock London off balance while on the top rope. Romeo dominated the next couple of minutes, but got cocky and lifted London on a pin attempt in order to punish him more. He went for a frog splash, but London moved. Then London hit his Pancake Face followed by a shooting star press ("London Falling") for the win.

WINNER: Paul London at 11:26.

STAR RATING: **3/4 -- Solid four-way X Division action.

-Tenay and West talked up the rest of the line-up on the show. Tenay said NWA officials were upset with the faction feuding and have decided to try to restore order by hand-picking members of various factions and forcing them to be tag team partners. "Enemies now have to be friends," said West. Tenay talked about the Hard Ten Tournament. He said the hardcore matches have been out of control. He said there is a simple scoring structure system they'll go over later. Tenay said cameras have been placed all over the TNA Asylum in order to keep track of what's going on and crack down on the mischief. That's a good explanation for cameras being everywhere. Nice to see TNA trying, unlike WWE (like Triple H revealing is secret plot with Ric Flair on Raw last week right in front of the camera).

-Sonny Siaki told Goldy backstage to watch him be a leader for SEX. He gave a pep talk, but the Harrises, Mike Sanders, David Young, and Triple X didn't pay him any attention. He asked Young to go get Raven so he could concentrate on his match with Sandman later, but Young said he was busy with a tag match later. Siaki was suspicious of something going on between Young and Desire. Siaki told Young to go sit down. He said he would get Raven himself.

-Backstage Raven shoved Julio Dinero and Alexis over what happened last week. He threatened to pour bleach down Alexis's throat, then stopped and said: "Betray my soul again and neither of you will have a destiny."

2 -- AMAZING RED & SLASH & JUSTIN CREDIBLE vs. ELIX SKIPPER & CHRISTOPHER DANIELS

Tenay explained that the NWA got fed up with Triple X dictating that they'd decide at the last second which two are going to wrestle matches, so when Low Ki went down with an injury, they made them wrestle two on three without adding a partner. Tenay wondered, though, if Daniels & Skipper would still have the advantage because of teamwork experience. Slash tagged in Justin and they worked together in stomping away at Daniels. Tenay and West expressed amazement that Justin and Slash could work as a team so well as to stomp away at Daniels at the same time. Justin slingshot himself over the top rope onto Skipper at ringside. Daniels mistakenly dove onto Skipper at ringside. Red then dove over the top rope with a swandive onto everyone in a nice, graceful move. As the match developed, Daniels and Skipper used teamwork to dominate the match. Red got in some good offensive moves and took even better bumps. At 9:20 Red ducked a double clothesline and came back with a dropkick onto both heels. He then hot-tagged Credible at 9:40 and he cleaned house. Justin scored a two count on Elix at 10:15. Daniels grabbed one of the tag belts and nailed Justin coming off the ropes with it. Elix got a two count, but Slash made the save. Skipper scored a near fall on Red after a Rocker-style suplex/bodyblock combination. Red came back and leaped off the top rope onto Skipper. Daniels tried to break up the pin, but Justin and Slash held him off. Red scored the pin. Raven snuck into the ring and Red the Raven Effect DDT.

WINNERS: Red & Slash & Justin at 12:05.

STAR RATING: *** -- Good match with a strong storyline and pacing throughout.

-Raven cut a promo in center-ring. He said he will be laying out as many others as possible without compassion until he gets Jarrett in the ring. Red lay in the ring writhing in pain, his two "partners" long gone without helping him.

-Don West said among his favorite shows are "The Man Show" and "Jackass." Big surprises there. He said he saw something "involving our own." Not sure what that meant, but then they cut to this...

-Goldy was shown going into a phone store complaining about a problem with her cell phone not working. The first 30 seconds of this left me wondering like I've never wondered before: What in the hell is going on?! But I figured there would turn out to be a point. There wasn't. The man at the store said he couldn't fix her phone. She yelled at him and said she is going to get revenge for him not helping her. She said she'd be waiting for her him in the alley. Then she smashed her phone and stomped on it while yelling at him. She said that would be him. Then she started kicking around a display and breaking it. Glass shattering noises were added. That segment was as pointless as anything I've ever seen in pro wrestling. I mean, there isn't a word in the English language that can put in perspective how inappropriate, pointless, and masturbatory that segment was. And that's not even mentioning how poor the audio quality was. It was three minutes that seemed like an hour. Total amateur hour. Seriously one of the worst segments in the history of televised wrestling.

-Back live Goldy said, "What can I say, I guess it was that time of the month." Then she interviewed Mike Sanders who started bragging about beating wrestlers much bigger than him such as Andre, Undertaker, and Sid back when he broke in in '98. Typical Mike Sanders promo. She asked him about the "Hard Ten" tournament. Sanders laughed and said that word is spreading about him in the locker room, but it's exaggerated by about a half inch. Goldy quipped, "You mean by about eight inches." He said he had Brian Lee in the Hard Ten qualifying match. He said if he could beat Undertaker, he can beat the "Underfaker." He ended with a really strange "Heeeeyyyyy!" while spreading his arms apart. No idea what that was.

-Tenay explained the rules for the next match. One point for every blow with a weapon. Five points when your opponent goes through a table. Ten points wins, must win by two points. Fans were given weapons at ringside to hand to the wrestlers.

3 -- MIKE SANDERS vs. BRIAN LEE

Tenay debunked Sanders's bragging about beating Mike Awesome last week, instead saying that Sanders won only because of Gilberti's interference. The two bashed each other with weapons for five minutes as scores were announced out loud each time someone got hit. In the end, Lee dove at Sanders on a table, but Sanders moved. That counted as points for Sanders, making him the winner.

WINNER: Sanders at 6:05.

STAR RATING: 1/2* -- If you enjoy watching wrestlers hit each other with flimsy cookie sheets while trying to set each other on a table and not taking many bumps and exhibiting very little that a person off the street couldn't reasonably imitate, then this match was for you.

-Backstage Siaki warned Raven that he was going to feel the Siakilypse Now if he didn't call everything his way in the main event later. He then slapped him lightly on the cheek and called him "buddy." Raven just stood there, then smiled.

-Tenay and West began to explain the Anarchy Alliance eight-team tournament and said in the first match, New Jack and Shark Boy would team up against Ron Killings and Don Harris.

-In a segment taped earlier in the day, New Jack and Shark Boy played Candyland backstage. Goldy accused Jack of cheating. Jack ended up storming off in anger. Tenay said that made him wonder if Shark Boy and New Jack would have dissension while tagging.

-Goldy asked Killings about the "luck of the draw" getting Don Harris as a tag partner. Killings said it was a conspiracy because Konnan wasn't around. Killings acknowledged the Harrises comments a couple weeks ago about "running the pen." He said he'd let them "toss his salad." Goldy then made one of those grating screams as the Harrises attacked Killings. Good to see Killings actually be given some mic again, especially since he had yet to answer the Harris Brothers' racist drivel from a couple weeks back.

4 -- NEW JACK & SHARK BOY vs. RON KILLINGS & DON HARRIS - Anarchy Alliance Tournament match

The Harrises ended up attacking Shark Boy, New Jack, and Killings. Killings fought back with dropkicked. Shark Boy went for a dive onto Killings, but Killings turned it into a powerslam for the win. Tenay said Killings & Harris won despite the Harrises actions.

WINNERS: Don Harris & Killings at 3:20.

STAR RATING: *

-In a darkly lit hallway, Sandman told Raven that he screwed him over before by taking his wife and kid from him, so he didn't trust him in the match later. Raven said he set up Siaki and he has no idea. (Well, not if nobody watching the live show gets word to Siaki first.) Sandman initiated their shaky alliance by giving Raven a shot over the head with his kendo stick. Tenay said he didn't know what to believe from Raven.

-Goldy interviewed Kid Kash about being forced to team with Trinity. He said he's going to take care of "this bitch Trinity" and then next would be "that Ben-Gay ball rubbing bitch Tracy. He said next might be Goldy. Goldy told him to keep his hands off of Trinity. Then they walked away. Erik Watts then approached Goldy. He began rambling about Eric coming to TNA. Goldy stammered about whether it was "that Eric who is employed... uh, elsewhere." Okay, let's get this "Eric" storyline to the next stage. I mean, is he a wrestler? Why isn't he wrestling? What's he doing there if he doesn't ever wrestle? Erik then told Goldy he left her belongings under his bed. Rather than deny it, she blushed and said it wasn't the time because they're on the air. He joked that it was like they were on the air the other night. She blushed again. The Goldy distractions in this show are pointless and stupid.

5 -- DAVID YOUNG & TRACY vs. KID KASH & TRINITY

In the opening minutes of the match, Tenay announced that Jeff Jarrett would be defending the NWA Title against WWA Champ Sting on Sunday night in Australia. He told Australian and New Zealand viewers to check local listings. That was a nice touch to add credibility to the NWA Title, but it does beg the question: When is Sting coming to TNA? It sets expectations high that Sting is active and available, so why isn't he hired by TNA. At 2:00 Trinity wanted to tag in, but Kash wouldn't tag her. Instead, he gave her the finger. West said Kash has such disdain for women. Young then nailed Kash from behind with a clothesline. Young gave Kash a sideslam which looked like both wrestlers were on a different page.Young powered Kash into the corner buckle. Kash came back by climbing the ropes and coming off with a flying head scissors followed by a DDT. At 4:10 Kash tagged in Trinity, but he chewed her out first and then threw her at Tracy. Trinity tossed Tracy around the ring for a minute, prompting Tracy to tag in Young. Young then began working over Trinity. Kash made the save. Tracy came back and head scissored Young to the mat. Kash entered the ring illegally and slapped Tracy. "If you want to get in there with the men, you're going to get treated like the men," said Tenay, defending the action. "It's part of the deal," he added. Kash set up Tracy for the Moneymaker. The lights faded and then a computer distorted voice came over the sound system. The mystery luchador appeared on the big screen. He said next week the mystery would be revealed because next week he'd take him on one-on-one. Tracy then blindsided Kash with a chair. Young slammed Kash with a spinebuster quickly and scored the pin.

WINNER: YOUNG & TRACY at 7:42.

STAR RATING: 1/2* -- Not a lot of fun to watch for various reasons.

-Goldy interviewed D-Lo Brown and A.J. Styles. D-Lo said the difference between TNA and his former employer is that he can say whatever he wants when he gets a live mic in front of him. He said he doesn't want to talk about America's Most Wanted, he wanted to talk about Jeff Jarrett. He downplayed the importance of the tag tournament by saying that even though they want the tag titles, their real goal is the NWA World Hvt. Title. Styles stumbled over his words, but in essence told D-Lo that they should go to the ring and take care of this business.

-In the ring, Raven said he's running out of patience for Jarrett to answer his challenge. He then DDT'd Jeremy Borash. He sold it knocked out cold. As Borash was dragged out of the ring, we learned that Borash doesn't wear socks. Bill Behrens and Mortimer Plumtree walked out to the ring. Behrens seemed to be trying to stop Mortimer. Mortimer grabbed the house mic and did the ring introductions somewhat hesitantly. Tenay didn't explain what Mortimer was doing there and how he moved from a manager endlessly scouting talent to a backstage worker with an access pass around his neck taking over ring announcing duties.

6 -- A.J. STYLES & D-LO BROWN vs. AMERICA'S MOST WANTED - Winner Gets the Eighth and Final Slot in the Tournament

After some early offense by D-Lo and Styles, AMW dominated Styles during the body of the match. D-Lo got the hot-tag at 5:30. four-way action broke out at 7:30. Harris accidentally kicked Storm. Styles gave Storm the Styles Clash. Young, Daniels, and Skipper ran out. D-Lo hit Storm with a frog splash. Tenay said Triple X were trying to get both teams disqualified. Harris then rolled up D-Lo during the chaos to get the win. Tenay guessed that the SEX wrestlers were trying to get both teams disqualified.

WINNERS: America's Most Wanted at 8:37.

STAR RATING: ** -- Should have been better.

-A segment aired on Glenn Gilberti, who gave a State of TNA address, stating he would change the name of the promotion to SEX Presents if he had his wish. He said Raven may claim to have a 143 IQ, but then engages in a comedy of errors. "Maybe his past demons, his drug problems, rehab," said Gilberti. "He's lost some brain cells and some of his edge. He speaks before he thinks and sometimes it gets him into trouble. But Raven, as a performer is one of the best in the business. As a person, he's got issues." He said regarding Jeff Jarrett that they have a lot to prove to each other. He said he "gives a sh--" about Jeff Jarrett. He said he is a great wrestler from Hendersonville, Tenn. "He doesn't have the star power that a guy like me has in this business," he concluded.

-Back to Tenay and West at ringside who recapped what happened tonight. I don't care how many times they explain what happened tonight, I'm totally lost. I usually like TNA's creative gimmick matches, but this has been overkill. Too many tournaments and stipulations. West then plugged next week's show, and as usual looked terrified he was going to forget what he was supposed to say.

7 -- SONNY SIAKI vs. SANDMAN - Clockwork Orange House of Fun match with RAVEN as special guest referee.

Sandman walked through the crowd and spewed a mouthful of beer onto a pre-teen boy about 10 feet in front of him. It took a couple of minutes, but he finally made it to ringside. After he poured beer down the throat of a fan at ringside, Siaki hit him from behind with a trash can. There were objects, weapons, apparatus, and fencing sections scattered around the ring and hanging over the ring. Raven sat in the corner of the ring and watched calmly. Siaki bled from the forehead early. He set a trash can lid over Sandman's crotch and then bashed it with a two-by-four. Siaki hung Sandman upside down and then placed his foot on Sandman's crotch and grinded away as if he were putting out a cigarette butt. He bashed a bloodied Sandman in the forehead with a trash can lid. Sandman fought back at 4:00 with a chair. Raven still hadn't moved or shown any emotion while watching the match. Siaki nailed Sandman over the head several times with a kendo stick, finally knocking Sandman to the mat. Siaki called for Raven to crawl over and count his cover. Raven didn't move. Siaki hooked Sandman's leg, but Raven didn't move. He just stared blankly forward. Sandman then rolled up a frustrated Siaki from behind, and again no count from special ref Raven. Siaki clotheslined an outraged Sandman. Sandman set up four chairs and slammed Siaki onto fencing. He then came off the ropes, but Siaki moved so Sandman landed on the fencing. Siaki nailed Sandman in the gut with a chair. Sandman came back with a side Russian leg sweep onto the Kendo stick. Raven got up and counted to two, but then grabbed Sandman and DDT'd him. He then DDT'd Siaki. Tenay said Raven isn't for Extreme Revolution or for SEX, he's for himself. Justin Credible and New Jack ran to the ring. Raven then walked out of the arena and yelled for Jeff Jarrett. Amazing Red then leaped off of a platform with a headscissors on Raven. West declared Red was waiting for him all night, as if somehow Red knew he'd walk out of the arena through that door in a vulnerable position like that. Red brought Raven to the ring and gave him a flying head scissors. He went to the top rope, but Julio Dinero knocked Red to the mat. Julio whipped Red into the ropes, but Red turned it into a 718 onto Raven (which the director inexplicably cut away from right as he was about to do it). Red then knocked a charging Alexis into Julio in the corner. Red went back to ringside and punched away at Raven. Red then dove off the top rope and flipped onto Raven on a table. The table didn't break, but Red rammed hard into the side of the announcers table. He needed a few seconds to recover, but then punched away at Raven. He then went back to the top rope and landed on Raven again, this time crashing him through the table, breaking it. Raven convulsed as the show cut to credits.

WINNER: No contest in 10:00

STAR RATING: *1/2 -- Some spectacle brawling, but pretty lame match overall.

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