By Wade Keller, PWTorch editor

WWE RAW REPORT
JANUARY 26, 2004
LIVE FROM HERSHEY, PA.

-The show opened with fireworks and Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler introducing the show. Ross briefed viewers on the major results of the Rumble.

-Chris Jericho came out to his "Don't You Wish You Were Me" song off of the new WWE CD. Jericho said everyone may assume he'd be upset with Chris Benoit winning, but he said Benoit is going to get a title shot at the Smackdown champion, which leaves the Raw World Title wide open for him. He said as the last Raw survivor in the Rumble, he wanted to cash in his favor from Eric Bischoff and get a title shot. Lawler and Ross said he has a plan. Jericho then said when he wins the title he's going to take the title to New Hampshire, then he recited a bunch of other cities and ended up with a barbaric yelp, imitating Howard Dean, a topical riff.

Eric Bischoff then walked out. He said Jericho can use that as his favor, but he had something else in mind. He then pointed to the big screen and a promo aired for a Kane vs. Trish Stratus match. He said he could give Jericho the title match he wants, or he can cancel the Trish-Kane match. Bischoff said he can tell he still has feelings for Trish. Without Jericho saying anything, he said, "Consider the match cancelled." Bischoff told Jericho he is upset with Smackdown wrestlers winning the Rumble the last two years. He said he is so upset, he is going to make Jericho team with Rob Van Dam, the other last remaining Raw fighter in the Rumble, face Batista & Ric Flair & Randy Orton. He then dropped a final bombshell on Jericho - that three-on-two match was next.

[Commercial Break]

1 -- RIC FLAIR & RANDY ORTON & BATISTA vs. CHRIS JERICHO & ROB VAN DAM

Flair and Jericho began the match. Flair poked Jericho in the eye to get control, then tagged in Randy Orton. Ross talked about Mick Foley being at the Rumble and wondered whether he'd be at Raw. Lawler asked whether Orton could have won the Rumble if not for Foley's interference. Lawler also wondered why Foley showed up at the Rumble in the first place. Ross said there are a lot of questions about his status. Ross said he's tried calling him last night and all day today, but he couldn't get ahold of him. At 3:30 Jericho nailed Orton with a dropkick for a two count. Orton tagged out to Flair. RVD hit him with some kicks at 5:00. Ross and Lawler then talked about his surprise that the Dudleys lost to Flair & Batista at the Rumble. RVD then hit Rolling Thunder at 5:30 and went for a cover, but Orton made the save. Jericho dropkicked Batista off the ring apron, then leaped off the apron at him. Batista caught him and slammed him to the mat. Ross speculated that it could be a three-on-one match now as they cut to a mid-match break.

[Commercial Break]

Upon returning from the break, Jericho was still down outside the ring. Evolution beat up on RVD for several minutes, including Flair working over RVD's arm. I like the long-term selling of a slam at ringside that in past years would have been treated as a transition move into either another high-impact highspot or a full-fledged comeback by Jericho. Orton tagged in at 13:00 and continued working over RVD's arm, staying with a specific strategy. Jericho pulled himself back up to the ring apron. Lawler said Jericho may have a concussion and perhaps shouldn't return to the ring. RVD came back with a nice dropdown spin wheel kick, then hot-tagged Jericho at 15:00. Jericho flew around the ring, knocking Orton off the ring apron and then dropkicking Batista's knee and then backdropping Flair. Jericho took Batista down and went for the Walls of Jericho. Batista powered out. Jericho powered Batista over in an awkward spot and went for the cover. Orton made the save. Jericho backdropped Orton over the top rope. Batista then went for another powerbomb, but Jericho escaped and took Batista down again. He twisted Batista into a full Walls of Jericho. RVD fended off a Flair interference attempt. RVD then gave Flair the Five-Star for good measure. Orton ran into the ring and went for an RKO, but it didn't connect. He immediately went for it again and hit it this time. Nice thinking on his feet by Orton who went with the flow when the first one didn't connect. Not sure if he overshot or Jericho didn't go with it.

WINNER: Batista & Flair & Orton when Batista pinned Jericho at 17:09.

STAR RATING: ***1/4 -- Good TV tag match. Psychologically sound and well executed.

[Commercial Break]]

-Orton confronted Bischoff backstage and threw a fit about Foley costing him his Royal Rumble win and an "all-Evolution WrestleMania main event." Orton said he heard Foley was going to be at the arena, and he asked Bischoff for permission to attack him when he saw him. Bischoff said "permission granted." Steve Austin then entered the picture with a beer in hand. He told Orton he could try to kick Foley's ass, but not until Foley had a chance on the mic to rebut his commercial spots calling him a coward over the last few weeks.

-Trish approached Jericho in his locker room and thanked him for sacrificing a World Title shot. Trish said that they were on the verge of a good relationship. Jericho said he felt that, too. She said, "good friends." Jericho sounded disappointed that she referred to him as friends. She offered him a handshake. She said she could be friends, but not the type like Christian who would go out on the town and help him score chicks. Jericho asked her how she heard about that. Uh, maybe Jericho should tape Raw from now and watch it, or read the internet wrestling reports about the shows he's on. Anyway, Christian barged in and told him he was crazy to give up a World Title match over a teenage crush.
Jericho asked him why he wasn't there for him when he was getting outnumbered in the previous match. Christian told Jericho he threw him over the top rope at the Rumble. Jericho told Christian that he (Christian) attempted to throw him over first. Christian said he was busy meeting with Bischoff to try to smooth things over for them. He told Jericho he set up a no. 1 contender's match next week for them to go after the tag team titles. "This is Raw, not an episode of the OC." He concluded by telling Jericho to straighten up and get his head out of his ass. That's a nice twist with Trish declaring a truce with Jericho, but stopping short of wanting to date him again.

[Commercial Break]

2 -- STEVEN RICHARDS (w/Victoria) & LITA vs. MOLLY HOLLY & JAZZ (w/Teddy Long)

Jerry Lawler said he heard a rumor that Playboy magazine is looking for the hottest pair of WWE Divas to feature in another photo spread. (The last I heard, Sable and Torrie agreed to do a photo shoot in the same issue.) As you can imagine, the next several minutes were filled with Lawler making references to "taking women into dark rooms to see what develops" and other such lines. Ross must have shot Lawler a dirty look at one point because Lawler defensively said, "What? What did I say?" The heels worked over Victoria with mat holds for several minutes. At 4:00 Victoria hot-tagged Molly who went to work on both Jazz and Molly. At 4:45 Lita tagged out to Victoria. Four-way action ensued with Lita and Jazz brawling at ringside. Victoria blocked a Molly suplex and then turned it into an inside cradle for the pin.W

WINNER: Victoria & Lita when Victoria pinned Molly at 5:35.

STAR RATING: *1/4

-They showed Triple H bandaged up and approaching the stage entrance.

[Commercial Break]

-Triple H walked out to the ring with the World Title belt over his shoulder. Ross talked about the draw the night before. He said some people think Michaels's time to become champion is coming. Lawler said Hunter never imagined he'd leave on a stretcher, but that's what happened. Hunter somewhat reservedly pointed out that he is still the World Champion. Michaels then walked out to his music with one bandage on his forehead. Ross said Michaels is still the no. 1 contender for the World Title. Michaels entered the ring as an exhausted Hunter looked on. Hunter said, "What have I got to do to you, huh? Haven't you had enough yet." Michaels smiled and said, "You and me, we haven't even gotten started yet." Austin then rode out in his ATV as his music played. He managed to avoid killing or dismembering anyone once again. He played to each corner of the arena with his middle finger salutes.

Austin said it's a shame that Michaels wrestled a hell of a match, but in the case of a draw, Hunter retains the title. He said the rules of the Royal Rumble state that the winner gets to face the champion, but they don't specify which champion. He then said he'd like the winner of the 2004 Royal Rumble to come out to the ring. Ross said, "This is not Thursday night and this is not UPN." You know, that brand split is sinking in because it felt really strange to hear Benoit's entrance music on Monday night. The crowd chanted a "Benoit" chant.

Benoit said, "I can tell I'm the last person either one of you expected to see." Benoit said both men went through hell fighting for the World Title. He said he did, too. He said for 18 years he's fought to be the best. He said it took him 62 minutes to beat 29 men to get the opportunity to face the best at WrestleMania. "Whether that's you, Shawn Michaels, or you, Triple H, at WrestleMania I will fulfill my destiny. I will be the next World Heavyweight Champion." Benoit's music then started. Ross said, "How the hell can that be?" Ross acknowledged that the Rumble rule doesn't say which champion the Rumble winner faces. Lawler said Benoit has apparently made it clear he wants to face the Raw champion. Ross said it was astounding.

[Commercial Break]

-Ross and Lawler reacted to the Benoit bombshell. They said it must be the working of Bischoff, and then they wondered if Paul Heyman was going ballistic right now watching the show.

3 -- BUBBA RAY DUDLEY vs. KANE

After some early offense by Bubba, Kane dominated Bubba. He rammed Bubba with the stairs at 2:00 prompting a DQ.

WINNER: Bubba at 2:00.

STAR RATING: 1/4* -- Not much to it, but it served its purpose.

D-Von ran out for the save, but he ended up getting tombstoned. Undertaker's gong then sounded. A horror trailer type video then aired with laughing children and close-ups of Kane's face and other haunted house images. Kane looked a bit freaked out.

-Bischoff was on the phone and told Heyman he had no idea Benoit was going to be on Raw. He said Austin doesn't tell him his plans ahead of time. Bischoff said if Benoit wants to come to Raw, he isn't going to stop a great athlete like that. Heyman said on speaker phone he is on to his game. He accused Bischoff and Austin of playing "good cop, bad cop" with him. He told Bischoff to "lawyer up because I'm going to sue your ass." Coach then walked up to Bischoff and asked what's up. Bischoff told him Heyman is threatened to sue. Coach began laughing and said, "Watch if or he'll kick your ass again like he did last night." Bischoff then did the "Do I make you laugh" routine from Goodfellas. He then told Coach he was going to put him in a no DQ match with Goldberg. The crowd popped and Ross said, "Oh my god!" Lawler laughed and said, "It's going to be great."

[Commercial Break]

4 -- RICO (w/Jackie Gayda) vs. ROB CONWAY

Rico spanked Conway early in the match. Ross said he was playing mind games. Conway gave Rico a boot and sent him to the floor where Rene Dupree stomped away at him at ringside, then threw him back into the ring. Conway, with thousands of mat holds to choose from, went to a chinlock. Rico flipped out of it 30 seconds later, then hit an atomic drop. Rico threw some punches. When Conway made a comeback, Jackie pulled down her top to expose her bare breasts (off TV) to Conway, thus distracting him leading to Rico hitting a spin wheel kick and scoring the pin. Lawler said, "I think the elastic in my underwear just melted." After the match Stacy came out to her music and held up Jackie's arm as if they had just won the tag team titles.

WINNER: Rico at 3:20.

STAR RATING: 1/2*

-The WrestleMania Flashback to 1993 featured Jim Ross announcing his first WrestleMania at Caesars Palace.

[Commercial Break]

-Mick Foley walked into the arena with an "all business" look on his face.

-Ross and Lawler talked about Foley, then still shots aired of Goldberg being eliminated by Kurt Angle after interference from Brock Lesnar. Ross said Goldberg has reason to complain about how that played out.

-Coach walked out and said nobody wants to see him against Goldberg. He begged Bischoff to change his mind. Teddy Long came out with Mark Henry. He said he is tired of crackers winning the Royal Rumble. He offered Henry to Coach to be in his corner for his match. Coach's demeanor got more confident. He said he's down with that.

[Commercial Break]

5 -- GOLDBERG vs. COACH (w/Teddy Long, Mark Henry)

Henry entered the ring to start the match. Ross said he knows it's a no DQ match between Coach and Goldberg, but he didn't expect to see Henry start the match. Henry and Goldberg went at it. Goldberg knocked Henry down. Henry bailed to ringside for a pep talk from Coach and Long. Ross said Long "ain't no Joe Paterno." Henry returned to the ring and slowed Goldberg with forearms and then took him down with a clothesline. Coach sat on the ropes in the corner and cheered on Henry in his cocky fashion. He mocked Goldberg clutching his ribs. Henry applied a bear hug for a minute. Goldberg came back with a powerslam. He then threw Coach into center ring and gave him a Spear. He followed with a crowd-pleasing Jackhammer and a pin. Long held back Henry at ringside. Goldberg then looked into the camera and said he was going to chase down Brock Lesnar no matter where he is because "he's next."

WINNER: Goldberg at 5:00.

STAR RATING: * -- An interesting twist on just another Goldberg squash of a mid-carder. Good use of Coach, who was effective as the cocky heel who got his ass handed to him in the end.

[Commercial Break]

-Mick Foley came out and said the fans have been asking why since Dec. 15. He said he will try to offer an explanation. He said his success has come from redirecting hatred and thus producing things in the ring that people thought were humanly impossible. He said he looked up to Pete Rose, who approached the game as if he were angry with the world. He said looking at Rose now, long retired at age 61, still angry at the world, is sad. He said he didn't want to become that person. He said when he retired, he managed to find his way to a good place where he was happy with himself without having to redirect any hatred as a release. He said the mistake he made on Dec. 15's Raw wasn't walking out on the match, it was accepting the match in the first place.

He said Randy Orton is a good athlete, but he has been making life a bit difficult for him lately. He called Orton to the ring, and asked that he come without other Evolution members. He said he had a favor to ask of him. Orton walked out and grabbed a mic of his own. "You want a favor from me, Mick? I dare ask, what do you want from me?" Orton asked. Foley asked him to spit in his face again. Orton laughed and said, "You want me to do what?" Foley said it may be goofy, but he knows he can do it because he's felt the warmth of his spit that night in Tampa. He was wondering if that was a fluke and if he has it in him to spit in his face again "here in Hershey, Pennsylvania."

Orton began to talk. Foley knocked the mic out of his hand. Foley turned it up and began running down his credentials. He said he listened to him for seven weeks, but now he's the one doing the talking. He slapped him a few times. Orton finally spit at him. Foley then paused and said he isn't going to hit him. He said he is going to turn the other cheer. He asked him to spit on that other cheek as well. He criticized Orton for a lackluster wad of spit. He asked him to exume something "real green from way down deep, dig it up and plant it right here." Orton spit on him again. Foley let out a "whoo!" He had the camera do a close-up and it didn't exactly look like spit on his beard.

Foley said with kids he's been peed and pooped and thrown up on. He said the person who came up with the sticks and stones saying didn't get called "Randy Orton's bitch." He said that he didn't count on people starting to believe him, but the Big Lie Theory says if someone says something over and over again, the public will eventually buy it even if it's absurd. Orton looked at Foley as he freaked out as if he were totally insane. Foley ran down some of the highlights of his physical maladies in his career. He screamed that he had returned to the dark corner again. He said he can't deny the hatred in him anymore. He said he welcomes it. "There is a time and a place for hatred, Randy Orton. The place is Hershey, Pa. (crowd pops). And the time is now."

Foley then hit Orton with the mic and went after him with a barrage of punches. He bashed Orton in the corner and then drove a knee into his chest in the corner. Foley stopped a charging Flair, but then fell to a Batista clothesline. Foley fought back with a chair, jabbing Flair in the gut and bashing Batista over the back. Flair and Batista helped Orton to the back. Foley looked on, bleeding from above the eye, and bashing himself in the head with a chair. Ross said Foley is back.

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