WWE Raw Report WWE RAW RESULTS 7/12: Keller's ongoing coverage of live show on USA Network
Jul 12, 2010 - 10:11:30 PM
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KELLER'S RAW REPORT
JULY 12, 2010
LIVE ON USA NETWORK
-Hmmm. No more Jim Ross in the opening for the WWE show. This is going to drive J.R. nuts because everyone's going to email his blog asking why he was removed from one of WWE's tributes to its history. I agree with putting Michael Cole on there as he's their A-announcer, but why take Ross out when his voice is such a big part of WWE history? It's not like there aren't political reasons for past editing of that pre-show WWE open, so is there more to this? Will Ross shoot down rumors quickly that he's been given an offer he can't refuse to join Paul Heyman in TNA or go on his own? It's another slap at his place in WWE history if it's just done to remove his signature voice from that opening for no good reason. I mean, besides Cole and John Cena, Freddie Blassie's voice was added, of all people.
-The show opened with a video package focused on the Nexus group.
-After the Raw opening, a welcome return after a week off last week, Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler introduced the show. Lawler revealed that Darren Young cannot compete tonight, so it's "only" six-on-one with the Nexus crew versus John Cena later.
-Cena made his ring intro and entered the ring to a standing ovation. He started by thanking all of the WWE Superstars who "finally" helped him against Nexus last week. (Interesting that he said "finally," as if implying they took longer than he hoped or weren't there for him in the past.) He said he looked back at what happened it was a missing something - a white flash with red hair. He said Sheamus never showed up. He said Sheamus will realize some day that they need to fight the Nexus as a group. "We're all in this together," he said. He said next Monday he will wake up and find out he just lost the WWE Championship. He said in their cage match on Sunday, "I plan on ripping his face off and replacing it with his butt." Cue the ten year old boys laughing and everyone else groaning. He said on Sunday he will have to prove he's good. There will be no rainbows, no pot of gold, no four-leaf clovers, "and I promise you the only Lucky Charms will be the sweet delicious cereal that I eat for breakfast." (How much do you want to bet he doesn't touch those because it certainly doesn't coincide with his physique.) He said the cage is great because there's nowhere for him to run and no one can interfere. He said he can say confidently that on Sunday "the Champ will be here!" Cheers and boos.
He said as grueling as his cage match will be on Sunday, it's his easiest match of the week because he's in a six-on-one match later on this show. He said last Monday Darren Young ran into him and he won't be able to compete this week as a result. The Nexus crew walked onto the stage. Wade Barrett said they'll wait until later to attack him because it'd be too easy to do it now. He said he brought this all on himself. He said he's a hot-head and he's too short-sighted to see that the Nexus stands for a much larger picture. He said he disrespected the G.M., and for that, tonight, he's going to get exactly what he deserves. Cena said he deserves to knock his teeth down his throat. The mystery G.M. email chime sounded.
Michael Cole asked for everyone's attention. He read: "Mr. Cena, based upon your blatant disregard for my instructions last week, if any Superstar gets involved in any conceivable way in tonight's handicapped match, they will be suspended for 90 days." The crowd interrupted with several "Whats." He also ruled that the Nexus must tag in and out tonight and if they don't abide by it, they will be suspended as well. Cena shouted, "Finally, Internet justice." What does that mean? Barrett said they're fine with that because he'll be in the ring all alone. Cena said he may be brought down by them tonight, but if so, he's taken a few of them with him. [c]
1 -- ALICIA FOX vs. GAIL KIM
Eve joined Cole and Lawler at ringside. Lawler asked her how it felt to be the best looking woman in the building. Eve said if Fox can look at herself in the mirror and feel proud of her title win, then more power to it. She said she'd like to get a rematch and she won't fall for the same fake leg injury trick again. Lawler led Eve through commentary the way Lance Russell would lead a green wrestler through an interview on Memphis Wrestling 30 years ago.
WINNER: Fox in 2:00.
-The G.M. chimed in and Cole stated that due to Fox faking a leg injury last week, he was giving Eve another Divas Title match on Sunday's PPV. The G.M. is trying to build credibility points for being objective to create plausible deniability when he/she rules against Cena in a sneaky way. [c]
2 -- TAMINA & JIMMY & JEY USO vs. THE HART DYNASTY (Tyson Kidd & David Hart Smith) & NATALYA
Cole and Lawler plugged the Tag Team Title match with the two teams in this match on Sunday. Lawler noted that Florence Henderson, the mother on "The Brady Bunch," was guest host tonight. Tamina interfered to cost Kidd his early offensive flurry. Cole said "there is tremendous sports entertainment heritage in the ring right now." After 20 years it still hasn't caught on and it won't. Tamina and Natayla brawled at ringside as Jey and Jimmy double-teamed DHS leading to a big top rope splash by Jey for the win.
WINNERS: The Usos & Tamina in 3:00.
-Backstage Barrett thanked Chris Jericho for all he did for him on NXT. Jericho said he's doing all he taught him and he's proud. He shook his hand. Josh Matthews tried to interview Jericho, but Jericho blew him off. Barrett, meanwhile, ran into Yoshi Tatsu. Tatsu said Cena is his friend. The Nexus group attacked him backstage. [c]
-They showed "I Fight Dragons" in the front row. One of them posted. Lawler said it's a good thing they're musicians.
-Ted DiBiase and Maryse walked out together. DiBiase introduced them as the Million Dollar Couple and "the most powerful couple in the WWE." (Uh, no, that's Undertaker and Michelle McCool... or Triple H and Stephanie McMahon...) He then said he is speaking of himself and the briefcase. Maryse seemed a little upset. He told her not to be upset because when he win the briefcase, he can shower her with gifts and win the WWE Championship. She warmed up to him with those comments. John Morrison's music then interrupted.
Morrison entered the ring and asked "Teddy" about showering Maryse with gifts. He said that's a mistake because French don't take showers. She fired back in French and revealed the name of the anonymous G.M. Not really. Morrison translated and said, "Maryse just said everyone in this arena has hippopotamus breath" and other mean things. He said she herself resembles the dung-chewing African platypus. She got upset. He told her not to be upset with the messenger. DiBiase attacked him. DiBiase said he'll pay for disrespecting them. Morrison made a comeback with a front kick out of nowhere. He shot a look at Maryse, then set up Starship Pain, but Maryse pulled DiBiase out of the ring. Morrison flipped onto his feet. Lawler said Maryse would make a great trophy wife, then wondered if he really translated what she said. Oh, that Jerry.
-Cole plugged the Cena vs. Nexus main event. [c]
-A spoof of the Brady Bunch theme and opening aired with Santino as the dad with Goldust, Great Khali, and Vladimir Kozlov as his kids, with William Regal the other parent with Zach Ryder, Primo Colon, and Doink the Clown as his kids. It was billed as "Santino's Bunch vs. Regal's Bunch" with Florence Henderson as the mom. How does Florence look the same as she did on the Brady Bunch back in the 1970s? Seriously, is that her daughter? She channeled Hilary Clinton with her body language as she said how excited she was to be hosting Raw. There was a laugh track for everyone Santino said, including a joke that Ricky Henderson is her son. Regal walked in and said what he's watching is utterly appalling. Regal wondered if the new G.M. is Gilligan. There was no laugh track, but Regal paused for it. Henderson said he didn't get a laugh bceause he is not funny. Regal said if he wanted advice, he'd go to the Partridge Family. She slapped him and told him to never disrespect Carol Brady. Santino said he liked that and moved in for a kiss. She blew him off. The Brady Bunch music played as they showed the exterior of Rupp Arena, which looked like my local Lexus dealership more than an arena.
-Lawler wondered who would fill the empty slot in the Money in the Bank ladder match on Sunday, vacated by the injured R-Truth. Lawler said the replacement would be named later.
-A video feature aired Edge winning the Money in the Bank match and going on to win the World Title. [c]
[Note: Check out the TNA News section for James Caldwell's in-person report at the TNA Impact tapings tonight in Orlando, Fla. including three more ECW alum showing up for the big "ECW Invasion" angle on tonight's show, plus some TNA regulars take sides. Plus a feud between two former WCW World Champions is set up.]
-An ad aired plugging "the Nexus returning home" on NXT tomorrow night.
-Edge's ring entrance took place for his singles match against Randy Orton. Then came Orton's ring entrance.
3 -- RANDY ORTON vs. EDGE
Cole and Lawler said whatever these two do to each other in this match will pale compared to what they do to each other and others on Sunday in the MITB match. Edge set up a punt kick on Orton at 4:00, but Orton avoided it and snapped Edge to the mat with a powerslam out of nowhere. Edge threw Orton to the floor a minute later and they cut to a break at 5:00. [c] Orton took over at 9:00 with two clotheslines and another snap powerslam. Edge countered a second rope DDT by Orton with his implant DDT for a two count. Edge charged at Orton for a spear, but Orton met him with a kick. It was an awkward exchange, with Orton a bit late with the kick and Edge having to stop and wait briefly for it. Edge blocked Orton's RKO attempt. Orton leapfrogged Edge as he charged and then schoolboyed him. Cole turned up the volume and the crowd was popping for it all. Orton gave Edge a backbreaker and then pounded the mat. Then Jericho walked to ringside and threw his jacket into the ring. Edge then slammed a distracted Orton backward to the mat and leverage pinned him for a three count. Jericho gave Edge a Code Breake.r Orton gave Jericho an RKO. Evan Bourne ran out and spin wheel kicked Orton and then set up Air Bourne from more than half way across the ring. Orton, though, countered with an RKO. The camera angle choices weren't the best by the director. A wide shot would have been than the quick change of view mid-move, but it was still a pretty cool sequence. They went to a wide angle shot on the replay.
WINNER: Edge in 12:00.
STAR RATING: *** -- It really picked up at the end.
-Matthews interviewed Skip Sheffield regarding what Nexus's plan is for NXT tomorrow night. He asked if they plan to focus on the Rookies or the Pros. Skip just walked away. He bumped into Morrison. Morrison said he wasn't intimidated. The rest of Nexus showed up. Morrison threw the first punch - an elbow, actually. He was then swarmed by the six Nexus heels. Skip threw him through two industrial doors, then picked him up and punched him back down. They took turns beating on him, including throwing ihim into storage crates, then standing over him in a circle. They're doing a great job making it seem where there's one Nexus member, the rest show up within a few seconds. [c]
-The Miz walked out and said all night everyone is talking about how they plan to win the Money in the Bank ladder match. He said talk is cheap. He threw to a video package of Miz last week beating R-Truth and knocking him out of the match. Miz said he doesn't have to talk because his actions speak for themselves. He asked the crowd if they get it. He said he's never been more serious in his life. He said he didn't need a ladder to take out R-Truth; he did it with his bare hands. He said he took away R-Truth's dream with his bare hands. "Wherever in the world R-Truth is, he's not dancing," he said. On Sunday when he has a ladder in his hands, what he did to R-Truth will pale in comparison to what he does to his other opponents. "One down, six to go," he declared. "Because I'm the Miz and I..." The anonymous G.M. chimed in.
Cole stepped to the podium and asked for everyone's attention. He said The Miz will now compete with R-Truth's replacement in the MITB ladder match. "See, Miz, there's an old saying, just when you think you have the answers, I changed the questions." That went over most fans' heads, but it was meant to hint at Roddy Piper being the G.M. Mark Henry's music played.
4 -- MARK HENRY vs. THE MIZ
Henry overpowered Henry early. He pressed Miz into the air and dropped him face-down on the mat. Miz rolled to ringside. Henry threw him into the ring apron. Miz ducked a charging Henry, who went head-first into the G.M. podium structure that Cole stands on to read the emails. Miz then threw a blue plastic box on him and a bunch of garbage. Lawler said it was adding insult to injury. Miz stood around looking serious, because that's his new thing - show a serious, vicious side to his previously good-for-a-few-laughs persona. Henry struggled to stand up.
WINNER: No decision announced, presumably a double countout, in 1:00.
-Florence Handerson walked out. She touched the hands of wrestling fans,m but did so in a way that suggested she was scared of getting cooties. It was like how you act when you have to pick up the headless corpse of a mouse your cat left for you in the storage room. She is totally a cross between Linda McMahon and Hilary Clinton. She entered the ring and said hello to the "WWE Universe." She asked the fans if they were feeling "groovy." She introduced the eight-man Brady Bunch tag match match. She read from notecards, and who can blame her. Even Bruce Buffer gets names wrong.
5 -- WILLIAM REGAL & PRIMO & ZACH RYDER & DOINK vs. SANTINO & VLADIMIR KOZLOV & THE GREAT KHALI & GOLDUST
Cole asked, "Where did they dig Doink up from?" She got a kick out of the bounce in the ring as the wrestlers entered the ring. I'm suppose 15 years ago Dustin Rhodes and William Regal would be glad to know they're alive and well and still earning money on national TV in pro wrestling, but this is hardly a dream scenario in terms of their talents being utilized in money-spots. Santino opened with a karate pose. Regal elbowed hi to the mat. Henderson wore Regal's robe, which distracted Regal, Santino hit Regal in the face with his signature Cobra. Chaos then broke out after Primo broke up the pin. Doink stalked Santino. Santino tagged in Khali. Doink begged off, but then tried to slam Khali. It didn't work. Doink used a squirt gun against Khali. Cole declared that Khali has been blinded. Khali recovered, punched Doink, and scored the pin. I'm happy because there was no sign of Ranjin Singh.
WINNERS: The Santino Bunch in 2:00.
-Afterward Santino moved in to kiss Henderson. Henderson ducked and walked up to Khali. She made out with him. She pretended to nearly pass out. Seriously, how does she look the same age as she did in 1974? [c]
-A commercial aired hyping Nexus coming home to NXT again. Should be interesting if the first NXT crew that didn't draw ratings on Tuesdays can pop a rating thanks to their Raw exposure on the same show tomorrow?
-Cole and Lawler hyped the Money in the Bank match. Cole said winning MITB virtually guarantees you win the World Title. They showed footage of C.M. Punk's win with the voice of Jim Ross!
-Matthews interviewed Edge regarding what happened with Orton and Jericho earlier. Edge said he wanted to thank Jericho for the wake-up call. He said he personified exactly what the MITB ladder match is all about. He said he now remembers you need eyes in the back of your head. He said he has been in more MITB ladder matches than anyone else. He said a little voice in his head reminds him to be void of compassion, void of scruples, and reminds him he is the ultimate opportunist who enjoys destroying the lives of everyone else. He said that voice talks to him and listens to him. (He needs Orton's theme song, then.) He said the voice also listens to him, and he told it that in six days in the MITB ladder match, the fun truly begins. He looked psycho.
-A trainer tended to Evan Bourne's neck. Sheamus finally appeared. He chuckled and asked Bourne if he's feeling okay. He said he is lucky it wasn't him because it would have been much worse. The Nexus group walked up and surrounded Bourne. Sheamus said, "All right lads, one of Cena's heroes is right here. He was bragging about how he jumped you last week. You may have to have a word with him." Sheamus walked away. They attacked Bourne and trash-talked him for good measure. Sheamus walked back after Nexus left and leaned in and said, "That'll teach you a lesson, won't it, fella?" He chuckled. The Nexus gang walked back into the picture. Sheamus looked concerned. He stood up slowly, then turned and ran away. Sheamus asked someone where Cena's locker room was. [c]
-The Nexus stood in the ring. They went to a replay of Cena's attack with the ring steps against Darren Young last week on Raw. Cena's ring entrance then took place.
[Q9 - Overrun]
6 -- JOHN CENA vs. THE NEXUS (Wade Barrett & Skip Sheffield & David Otunga & Heath Slater & Michael Tarver & Justin Gabriel)
Cole reviewed the two special rules the G.M. instituted for the match. Cena began against Carver. Cena successfully fended off Tarver and Gabriel. Then Sheffield entered. They had a collar-and-elbow lock-up stalemate. Cena danced with his early success. The Nexus dropped to the floor all at once to have a conference. Nexus surrounded the ring and then Slater hit Cena from behind with a cheap shot. Nexus methodically tagged in and out and took turns beating on Cena. Lawler made it seem hopeless for Cena. Cena hit Otunga with a back suplex. Barrett tagged in. Cena showed signs of life, but Barrett hit Cena with a big boot. Cena fired back with shoulder tackles and a slam to set up You Can't See Me. Lawler asked, "Are you kidding me?" Cena taunted the five Nexus members on the ring apron.
Cena dropped a fist on Barrett's head. Barrett staggered into his corner, but then walked into Cena's arms for an FU. Sheffield interfered, but the ref ruled that Sheffield actually snuck in a tag. Sheffield then nailed Cena with a clothesline. Otunga tagged in and slammed Cena, then tagged in Gabriel. He dragged Cena into the corner and set up his 450 splash. He landed it spot on and scored the pin. Lawler said it was all legal. Not entirely, since Slater's interference was illegal earlier (not cause for DQ, but still illegal).
WINNERS: Nexus in 7:00.
STAR RATING: *1/2
-Cena escaped a post-match attack and hit Slater in the back with a chair. Nexus regrouped at ringside. Nexus surrounded Cena again. Out ran Sheamus with a chair. He swung it wildly and lost his grip. He retrieved it from ringside and then helped Cena clear the ringside area of Nexus. "Those two men together tonight, enemies on Sunday," said Cole as the show faded to black.
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