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WWE Smackdown Report
PARKS' WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 1/6: Ongoing "virtual time" coverage of the show, including Daniel Bryan vs. Big Show for the World Title

Jan 6, 2012 - 9:00:49 PM
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WWE Smackdown review
Jan. 6, 2012
Taped 1/3/12 in Little Rock, Ark.
Aired on SYFY
By Greg Parks, PWTorch Columnist



- WWE Open.

- Clips of last week’s Falls Count Anywhere match were shown, with ultra-dramatic music in case you weren’t sure how to feel about what you were seeing.

- Smackdown Open.

- Lots of fireworks inside the arena in Little Rock, and what sounded like a hot crowd. Josh Mathews promised an update on Randy Orton’s condition later on. Then Michael Cole talked over a graphic that showed Daniel Bryan vs. The Big Show, which is for the World Title tonight. There was no Booker T at ringside, as the Intercontinental Title match was to lead off the show.

1 – BOOKER T. vs. CODY RHODES – Intercontinental Championship Match
During Cody’s entrance, they showed his attack on his brother from Smackdown last week. Cole questioned Booker’s stamina once the match began. Back-elbow by Booker for the first cover of the match at 1:09, getting only a one-count. Hard whip into the buckle by Rhodes and Booker collapsed in the corner. Cody slowed things down and worked the left arm. The men traded chops, and Rhodes cameo out on the losing end of the exchange. High back body-drop from the five-time WCW Champion. Side kick, “vintage Booker T.” according to Cole. Cover, again only one at 3:02. I’m noticing more kick-outs at one. Cody was thrown over the top but he skinned the cat back in. When he turned around, Booker clotheslined Rhodes back over the top rope and to the floor. Outside, Cody took advantage and dropped Booker throat-first over the barricade. They went to break at 4:08.

[Commercial Break]

Back from break, Booker tried a backslide for two, and nailed a superkick also for two. Cody halted Booker’s offense and hit a top-rope moonsault that barely caught Booker with basically just his arm. Rhodes sold it a little as he hit the mat hard, but then gave it up and made a cover. He did end up limping a bit after Booker kicked out. Rhodes tied Booker up in a rest-hold, but Booker fought out (with the help of the fans!) and hit a flying forearm. Another near-fall by Booker, then a spinebuster for two at 9:58. Rhodes dodged the scissors kick (not called an axe kick for some reason), but hit it soon after. Crowd bought the near-fall and Booker sold the shock of Cody kicking out well. Another scissors kick missed and Cody hit the Beautiful Disaster kick for the win.

WINNER: Rhodes, at 11:30. Good, decisive win for Cody Rhodes here, as it should’ve been.

After Cody left ringside and following replays, Booker sold dejection in the ring. The crowd clapped and he sadly waved to them, disappointed at the result of the match.

- Cole promised an update on Orton’s condition tonight. They had a graphic of Orton lying at the bottom of the staircase and played some Unsolved Mysteries-like music over it. Production is really emptying the vault this week.

[Commercial Break]

- As they showed clips of the previous match, Cole suggested a new Broadway play entitled “Bye Bye Booker.” Cole kept calling Booker old and said he doesn’t’ have it anymore.

- A confident Cody Rhodes was walking backstage. He came upon his brother Dustin, who congratulated Cody and said he just beat one of the all-time greats. Cody said his words don’t matter to him, and there’s a reason they haven’t talked for so long. Cody suggested that he’s already better than their father. He said he hoped his brother didn’t get any ideas from Booker’s comeback and warned Dustin not to put on the gold makeup and attempt one more run. He said right now he’s just a joke, not a laughingstock. After another shot at Booker, Cody walked off.

- Zack Ryder and Teddy Long quibbled over Ryder’s assistant GM title a la “The Office.” Ryder suggested a replacement for him and Drew McInytre walked in. “Are you serious, bro?” asked Long. McIntyre said he doesn’t want to talk about that, and Ryder said it wasn’t him…it was Santino Marella. Santino came in and suggested the duties he could help Long with, then reminded Long that McIntyre lost last week after the GM said he’d consider firing him. McIntyre got in Santino’s face for reminding Teddy. Long told McIntyre that if he loses tonight, he’ll be on very thin ice. He’ll face Santino, and if Marella wins, he’ll become Long’s assistant. McIntyre asked what he got if he won, and Long said he’d consider not firing him. McIntyre walked off as Aksana walked in to take his place. Santino’s cobra stood at attention, then Long asked him to give them space. Long began to make dinner plans as they cut away from that segment.

- Daniel Bryan vs. Big Show for the World Title is the main event tonight.

[Commercial Break]

- AJ and Alicia Fox were talking about their New Year’s Eve. AJ gushed about spending it with Daniel Bryan and said she was worried about his match tonight. Fox said she hoped his ego could handle a loss. Bryan walked up and said, “what ego?” He reminded Fox that he already beat Big Show. Fox walked off and Bryan asked AJ why she hung out with Fox. AJ admitted she was a little worried. Bryan reassured her then said when he wins, they can celebrate tonight. He kissed her forehead then walked off. They should have Big Show (or Henry, ideally) take apart Bryan so bad in a match that AJ runs in and throws in the towel to stop the match. That of course would send Bryan over the edge.

2 – HORNSWOGGLE vs. HEATH SLATER – OVER-THE-TOP-ROPE CHALLENGE

Hornswoggle bit the bottom of Slater and kicked him in the head (when Slater was on his knees). Slater took Horny by the throat and threw him down. Slater put his boot into Hornswoggle’s head in the corner. Slater placed Horny on the top rope, but Horny slapped Slater. Slater caught Horny and put him on the apron. Hornswoggle pulled Slater out of the ring by the hair, all the way to ringside.

WINNER: Hornswoggle, at 1:32. I was kind-of hoping we were done with Hornswoggle as an in-ring competitor.

After the match, Slater returned to the ring and kicked Hornswoggle in the head. Justin Gabriel ran out to make the save. Surprised it wasn’t Sheamus. Gabriel to the top, and he connected on the 450 splash. Gabriel and Hornswoggle celebrated post-match.

- Randy Orton’s status will be updated later tonight.

[Commercial Break]

3 – TED DIBIASE vs. HUNICO

Hunico came out with Camacho, on their bike. Hunico had a mic and complained that they’ve never been invited to one of DiBiase’s parties. Camacho called it disrespectful. Hunico said they’d have to bring the party to DiBiase tonight. Couple arm-drags by DiBiase to begin the match. The announcers claimed DiBiaes invited fans to his home, all expenses paid, to celebrate New Year’s. Hunico sent DiBiase into the corner and worked the arm. He took DiBiase’s down by the arm and wrenched on it. Samoan drop by DiBiase, then Hunico missed a corner charge. DiBiase came back with his array of offense and turned his opponent inside-out on a clothesline. Dream Street attempt, but Hunico brought the arm over his shoulder. Submission move locked in and it was turned into a pinning combination by Hunico – he wrapped the back of DiBiase’s arms around his leg, turned over and grabbed the legs, sat back, and got the pinfall.

WINNER: Hunico, at 3:03. Nice mat-based match there. Hunico needed a win or two over a more credible opponent, and surprisingly, DiBiase fits that right now. I could see the argument that DiBIase couldn’t afford this loss, but I think this was the right move.

- Wade Barrett was shown talking to a few trainers in the locker room, presumably about Randy Orton’s status. We couldn’t hear the conversation, but we’ll get an update on Orton soon.

[Commercial Break]

- Wade Barrett came out. Barrett got to the ring and said he told WWE doctors to stay in the back, that he could deliver the news on Orton’s injury (Barrett claimed Orton injured himself). But first, we got another video of the backstage brawl and the ending as the announcers talked over it. Barrett said the injury was a byproduct of the match itself. He then said Orton has a herniated disk in his back, but claimed Orton’s career is finished. He said Orton may try to come back one day, but psychologically would never be the same, yet another victim of the Barrett Barrage. Barrett brought up the Royal Rumble and said it would take place in Orton’s hometown. He said Orton will have to sit with the fans and watch him win. He claimed no other superstar could stop him from winning. Sheamus’ music interrupted and he came out. One day, wrestlers will learn to stop making grandiose claims on interviews in the ring – it only encourages interruptions.

Sheamus recited a story about his Uncle Wilfred, a sheepherder. He got kicked in the head by an animal once, which was his excuse for making up crazy stories. He asked Barrett what his excuse was for acting like a horse’s arse. Jinder Mahal’s theme interrupted before Barrett could answer. Barrett wisely went to ringside. Mahal entered the ring and stood toe-to-toe with Sheamus, then slapped him. Sheamus went on the attack, but Barrett made the save on behalf of Mahal. Sheamsu fired back with bodyslams, taking out both heels. He tried a Celtic Cross on Barrett, but Mahal kicked him in the gut. Irish Hammer took Mahal down, but Barrett hit the Winds of Change on Sheamus. He stood tall as his music played. Mahal then went into the ring and applied the Camel Clutch to Sheamus. A mid-card heel doesn’t often get to one-up a top babyface no matter the circumstances (heck, TOP heels are barely allowed to do this anymore), so this was nice to see.

- The announcers narrated clips of the end of the Chairs Match at TLC, followed by Mark Henry’s attack on Big Show and Daniel Bryan cashing in his MITB contract.

- They showed a Tale of the Tape between Big Show and Daniel Bryan. It’d be nice if they did this more often for title matches, rather than on occasions like this where they’re only doing it to point out the size difference between the competitors.

[Commercial Break]

4 – SANTINO MARELLA vs. DREW MCINTYRE

They criminally cut McIntyre’s entrance theme short on this night. They’re really making Long look like an idiot for signing McIntyre to a “lucrative contract” only to apparently read it for the first time AFTER McIntyre had signed and realized the how expensive McIntyre was. It was mostly McIntyre (sounds like a CBS drama) in the first minute. Future Shock rolled through into a pin attempt for a two-count. McIntyre was crotched on the top rope by Santino. Marella set up for the Cobra and it struck. Santino picked up his first win in…well…a long time, let’s say.

WINNER: Marella, at 2:30. It doesn’t hurt to give Santino a win every now and then, especially if you’re going to squash him most weeks.

Cole claimed the company would “go the way of WCW” with Long and Santino running things.

- From the WWE ’12 video game: Daniel Bryan vs. Michael Cole. Cole dominated and won the World Title. Thankfully it’s just a video game.

- Tonight, Bryan will defend the World Title, for the first time in fact, against Big Show.

[Commercial Break]

- Drew McIntyre was backstage lamenting another loss. Teddy Long walked in and McIntyre claimed Santino must’ve greased the top rope or something. Long said that was strike two, and if next week is strike three, McIntyre may very well be out. McIntyre angrily walked away. Santino then ran up to Teddy and celebrated their new partnership with the trombone.

- Primo and Epico were in the ring with Rosa Mendes. They showed an inset interview with Rosa where she spoke only in Spanish. She actually showed some charisma there, as opposed to when speaking in English.

5 – PRIMO & EPICO vs. AIR BOOM

Some back-and-forth to start, with the heels neutralizing Kofi Kingston a little after a minute in. Springboard cross-body off the second rope by Kofi on Episoc. Primo and Evan Bourne tagged in at 2:25. The video looks a little different at times on this show, mostly when the action reaches another gear. Don’t know if that’s on my end or WWE’s. Bourne went to the top and came down with the double knees on Primo’s chest. Epico broke up the pin, but Kingston took him down with a forearm. Rosa stood in front of Epico so that Kingston couldn’t jump him outside the ring. Knee to the face of Primo by Bourne, who then went to the top. Air Boom missed, then Primo (who was pulled out of the way by Epico, but the camera didn’t show it) jumped right on him for the pin.

WINNERS: Primo and Epico, at 3:48. Short match, but they packed a lot into it. Nothing wrong with the heels getting the win here to build them back up as title contenders again.

- Matt Striker was backstage with Big Show. Striker asked what Show’s confidence level was. He categorized it as “very high.” Show said he’s looking to regain the championship tonight. He called Bryan a “good wrestler,” but Bryan walked up and lectured Show about calling him simply a “good wrestler.” Does Bryan just stand around backstage waiting to interrupt conversations? Bryan again mocked Show for his short title reign. Show put his hand on Bryan’s shoulder and told Bryan, “don’t make me hurt you tonight.” Bryan told Show to get his damn hand off his shoulder. Show walked off, the threat of hurting Bryan still lingering in the air.

[Commercial Break]

- Just announced for next week: Sheamus vs. Jinder Mahal.

6 – NATALYA vs. TAMINA

Natalya was already in the ring. They showed video of Natties’ father, Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart, and really talked him up. During Tamina’s entrance, they showed clips of her father. They actually mentioned that he was a former ECW Champion. Nattie took Tamina down and Natalya brawled with her. Tamina tried to kick at Natalya while on her back, but it had no effect. Natalya tried the Sharpshooter, but Tamina kicked her off. Both went for a cross-body and both hit the mat hard. Tamina got to her feet and put Natalya up for a Samoan Drop. She grabbed Nattie by the hair and put her in position for the top-rope splash. She certainly took her time, but still hit the move to pick up the victory.

WINNER: Tamina, at 1:44. Boy, Natalya’s stock has certainly dropped over the past few weeks. Giving a push to Tamina, who isn’t the traditional Diva, is not a terrible idea though.

- The Raw Rebound aired.

- Daniel Bryan was shown walking backstage. Then in another shot, Show was shown walking down the hallway. They square off next.

[Commercial Break]

- Mark Henry came out to perform guest commentary duties for the main event. Henry did some trash talking at ringside, apparently with a young fan, whom he threatened, “I’ll beat the braces off you.”

7 – THE BIG SHOW vs. DANIEL BRYAN – WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH

Lilian Garcia did formal ring introductions. Henry said Bryan could be a champion “in the midget division.” It’s one thing to have a bias against pushing shorter wrestlers, but to constantly point out the size difference on TV as if it’s some sort of massive detriment, well, I’ll never understand that. Henry was already berating Josh Mathews before the match even began. Show laid in some massive chops, then picked Bryan up by the head. It was all Big Show as they went to break at 1:02.

[Commercial Break]

Back at the 4:33 mark. Bryan was attempting to sustain something offensive, but he was thrown to ringside. Henry yelled for him to get back in the ring. Show went out after Bryan so Bryan, already back in the ring, dropkicked him, leading to Show stumbling near the announce table. “What’re you all jumping for?” asked Henry to Mathews and Cole. Great stuff. Show and Bryan were both down outside the ring. Bryan got back in and Show recovered in time to roll back in at 8. Show slapped Bryan in the chest as Henry complained about the ref’s slow count. Henry threatened to slap the taste out of Cole’s match. Uh-oh, he’s turning babyface! Dropkick off the second rope by Bryan. Henry yelled at Bryan when he was once again at ringside. Bryan went to the top and Show slapped him in the chest as he jumped off. Clotheslines put Bryan down, but Show missed a corner splash. Spear by Show at 7:36. He struggled to make the cover and got a two-count. Show went for a chokeslam, but Bryan instead locked in the guillotine choke. Bryan was bleeding from the mouth as he wore Show down to the mat and put him in the LeBell Lock. Show broke out and wound up for the WMD. Bryan fled the ring and found himself between Henry and Big Show. Bryan began yelling at Henry, unprovoked, leading to Henry pushing him to the mat. For some reason, the referee took a while before awarding the match to Bryan via disqualification.

WINNER: Bryan, via DQ, at 9:43.

Bryan did his over-the-top celebration by standing on the barricades. He elicited some heel heat from the crowd. Big Show was not happy, but he had to watch Bryan get down on his hands and knees on the top of the ramp and kiss the title as they went off the air.

What do you think? If you saw this show, we invite you to send your thoughts. Send your name, hometown, a 0-10 score rating the quality of the show, your picks for best and worst segments, and then a brief paragraph of thoughts on the show that we can publish in the Reader Reax segment later tonight or tomorrow. Send to pwtorch@gmail.com.


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