WWA Retribution PPV report
December 7, 2002
Glasgow, Scotland
Report by Kyle Drummond of SmashWrestling.com

Hey, all. I've just got back from the World Wrestling Allstars (WWA) Pay per View in Glasgow. Here's a rundown of the matches and title changes.

Before I start properly, let me say that there was no commentary in the arena – Jeremy Borash and the others recorded a soundtrack for the televised Pay per View. There were titantrons, but they consisted merely of PowerPoint presentations of the combatants' names.

The show (titled "Retribution") starts with some light pyro and Jeremy Borash in the ring. He welcomes us to "Glasguw" (before apologizing after the crowd chanted the correct pronunciation) then talks for a while and introduces a troop of bagpipers. The drummer has "Scottish Power" on his instrument. I wonder how that will go down in America. Anyway, Borash introduces Disco as his announce partner. On the screen, Andrew McManus is shown making Mike Sanders the new commissioner.

(1) Shark Boy beat Frank "The Future" Kazarain. Good match with lots of high flying action and bumps to the outside. Shark Boy has a move where he pushes the opponent by their waist from behind with his head – like a shark nosing its prey I guess. Shark Boy wins with the Diamond Dust (Deep Sea Drop) – cool. I've never seen that outside of a computer game.

Sanders gives an address in the ring until Just Joe, now known as Joe E Legend, approaches the ring. Joe calls Sanders "the gimp from Pulp Fiction" and "Elton John's life partner". Sanders sets up a match and says he'll flatten Joe's face so he can bite a wall.   

(2) Konnan pinned Nate Webb. Nate Webb, a jobber who looks like a Headbanger, approaches the ring. As he parades about, Perry Saturn appears and demolishes him, finally hitting the Death Valley Driver followed by the application of the Rings of Saturn. Konnan comes down to win the match with an easy three, before joining Borash and Disco on commentary.

Backstage, two midgets fight over Midajah. Sanders looks in and warns them to behave or they'll go "straight back to the chocolate factory". He gives them a match and Midajah as referee.

(3) Swinger & Buff Bagwell beat Norman Smiley (announced from Australia, for some bizarre reason) & Malice/AWOL. The match isn't great, as it is lacking in pace. Malice is a monster, though. Smiley is cool but he looks totally out of place. As Smiley applies the wiggle on the ropes, Swinger low blows him and buff hits the Blockbuster, allowing Swinger to get three.

Jarrett announces backstage that he'll defend his title against Nathan Jones.

(4) TEO pinned Puppet. Highlights include Puppet's F5 variant and TEO's senton for the win. Midajah isn't bad as referee, if you catch my drift. Saturn comes down and demolishes the midgets. He has a Mohican and isn't orange anymore. Saturn claims to be "Kicking ass and taking names" then changes his tone and claims to be "Taking some ass". With that, he kisses the unwilling Midajah and leaves with her.

At this point I realized I was four seats away from Footballer Duran Duran. Back of the net!

Intermission.

(5) Mike Sanders beat Joe E. Legend. Joe has a new look – Rhyno's singlet with Palumbo's old hair. Surprisingly cool. Highlights include Joe's T-bone sitout pin and Sanders' pump handle T-bone. After Joe hits a top rope leg drop and moonsault for two each, Sanders' wins with an Irish superkick. Great match, and if anyone has ever more successfully reinvented themselves than Joey I'd like to hear about it. Sanders makes a three way dance with Saturn, Sabu and Simon Diamond for later… ECW rules.

(6) Jeff Jarrett pinned Nathan Jones to retain the NWA Hvt. Title. Jarrett is the heel but is cheered constantly – the guy has attitude. A standard small heel/big face match with Jarrett using leg moves and chokes. Jarrett is busted from the eye in the early going and it looks nasty – might not heal right for this Wednesday. Impressive Cactus clothesline from the seven foot Nathan Jones. Nathan gets two (leg on rope) with a huge gutwrench suplex but Jarrett comes back with a timely guitar shot to retain by pinfall. Jarrett was awesome, and this is good exposure for the NWA. Hopefully the companies can work together.  

(7) Lex Luger pinned Sting. Luger is still big but kind of fat. Sting (in black and red, carrying his bat) is the man, and so over you wouldn't believe it. Luger bails twice before Sting threatens "you're in need of a Glasgow kiss" (head butt to face). Luger returns and is Stinger Splashed for two. Sting puts Luger in the corner but Jarrett appears and clocks him with the guitar. Luger gets two and can't believe it. He goes for the torture rack but the referee is hit and Sting reverses into a Scorpion Death drop. Jarrett hits him with a third guitar and Luger gets three to become WWA champion. Sting was great as ever, but carried Luger, who drew real "retire" heat for being out of shape. I guess Jeff got his "Retribution", maybe for something in WCW.

(8) Sabu beat Simon Diamond and Perry Saturn. Saturn is being pushed just like Steiner, and arrives with Midajah in tow. Long, confused match with plenty of Sabu chairspots, one of which consists of throwing the chair at his opponent. Innovative. Before long Sabu is busted open. Simon hits the Simon Series for two. Sabu waits in the rings to dive out but when Saturn puts Simon on a table it breaks. Sabu gets another table for Simon and one set of legs breaks. He props it up against the apron, puts Simon on it and it breaks. By now he's angry, and the crowd in stitches. Another table, but this one breaks immediately. Eventually Sabu gets him on a table and hits an impressive splash from in the ring, using his customary chair as a springboard. Saturn enters the ring but is beaten by the two midgets from earlier armed with Singapore canes. Midajah intervenes but has to be saved by Saturn. Sabu kicks out of a Russian leg sweep and a DVD before Saturn is taken out and Midajah is stripped to her underwear. Nice. Saturn leaves with her and it's down to Sabu and Simon. Simon has a bad knee, either genuine or affected. Simoniser for two, before Sabu knocks him down and hits a springboard moonsault from the top rope for three.

Notes: Overall, the show was really good, better than last year by my standards and at least the quality of Raw. The biggest heat went to Luger and the star of the night was definitely the returning Steve Borden.    

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