By Wade Keller, Torch editor

RAW REPORT
FEBRUARY 14, 2005
TAPED IN CINCINATTI, OHIO

-Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler introduced and preview the show, including Batista vs. Edge. That should be interesting since Batista is getting the monster Goldberg-like push, yet they have high hopes for Edge as a top tier player and don't want to sacrifice him for an arbitrary TV match.

-Chris Jericho came out for his "Highlight Reel" interview segment. He interviewed Candice Michelle. They played the internet company ad where he had a strap malfunction and almost exposed her right breast to a committee of "older members of congress." Live in the ring, she undid her straps and teased exposing both breasts. Jericho did a sarcastic voice of a censor and made fun of the attitude that the world would end if that happened. Khosrow Daivari and Muhammad Hassan stepped out. Hassan was dressed in a more "Arabic" outfit with a white robe and headdress. Now their act is becoming a reheated version of the RTC gimmick. Hassan said the fans cheering her is an example of the dumbing down of America. He said Jericho was the poster child of stupidity. He called them juvenile names for a pop, saying they are poster boys for jackasses. You can always count on Jericho for a lame comeback. He then said they shouldn't be so angry since they share so much in common. He said they are Arab-Americans and he's the Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah. He said they're red blooded male Americans with penises, so why are they so upset about a woman in a state of undress. When Daivari yelled in foreign tongue, Jericho said, "You want to do what with me? That's disgusting. Y2J doesn't play on that side of the fence." He said he's seen them backstage hanging out together and looking deep into each other's eyes. "I get it, Daivari, you are Hassan's special little Valentine," he said. The crowd erupted in laughter. Jericho seemed to confuse them with Snitsky and Heidenreich. Hassan told Jericho to wipe the smile off his face. Jericho challenged the "ass clowns" to a fight. God, Jericho's character in general and that segment specifically was lame on so many levels.

[Commercial Break]

1 -- CHRIS JERICHO vs. MUHAMMAD HASSAN (w/Khosrow Daivari)

Lawler asked Ross who the final, unnamed member of the Class of 2005 Hall of Fame would be. Ross said he didn't know. Hassan got in the majority of the offense, including a cobra clutch mid-match. Jericho escaped and made a comeback, but delivered his ridiculous running in place war dance bit. Daivari distracted the ref as Jericho had Hassan pinned after an unconvincing offensive flurry (not convincing enough to justify how long Hassan laid there not kicking out). Jericho dropkicked him off the ring apron, but then turned and ended up getting face planted by Hassan for the loss.

WINNER: Hassan at 5:00.

STAR RATING: 3/4*

-Triple H told Ric Flair backstage that JBL was on his way to Raw to confront Batista. He said JBL showing up at Raw is like spitting in the faces of Evolution. He taped his fist and said he'd be ready for a fight. Flair said JBL didn't have the guts. Hunter told Flair to go tell Batista he had everything under control and he could concentrate on facing Edge.

[Commercial Break]

-A Hall of Fame spot aired including the addition of Roddy Piper to the inductee listing.

-Randy Orton told Stacy Keibler that he just found out that Roddy Piper would be at the Hall of Fame ceremony with his father, and when those two are together, it's always trouble. Stacy asked Orton out on a Valentine's Day date after Raw. Orton said yes.

-Flair approached Batista about the JBL rumor, interrupting his conversation with Christy. Batista told Flair he was focusing on his match with Edge (well that, and flirting with a Raw Diva). Flair told Batista if JBL becomes too big of a problem, he can go to WrestleMania and take care of him. Batista said he hadn't made that decision yet, but he planned to make an announcement after No Way Out next week on Raw. Batista told Flair to deliver a message to Hunter that he would take care of JBL himself and he didn't want Hunter in involved.

[Commercial Break]

2 -- SHELTON BENJAMIN vs. GENE SNITSKY -- IC Title match

Ross said during Shelton's ring intro that he is so proud of being IC Champion and wants to become known as the best IC Champ ever. He said that's why he has an open contract to defend against anyone. Out came Snitsky. Lawler questioned Shelton's judgment. Shelton offset an early Snitsky flurry with a kick to Snitsky's legs. When he went for an early cover, Snitsky powered out of the pin attempt. Shelton hit one Stinger Splash, but missed a second corner splash when Snitsky knocked him down. Snitsky then went into a chinlock. Shelton immediately rose to his feet and elbowed out of it. Snitsky crushed Benjamin with a running corner splash of his own and scored a two count. He followed up with a second rope elbow, but Shelton moved out of his path. Ross said he is really proud that Piper is being inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame. They fought back and forth for the next couple of minutes. Snitsky began punching away at Shelton with a closed fist. The ref yelled at him and counted to four. Snitsky got up and argued with the ref about his slow counts. That gave Shelton a chance to recover a bit. When Snitsky charged him, Shelton backdropped him over the top rope. Snitsky grabbed a chair at ringside and bashed Shelton with it, prompting the predictable DQ. There was no way they were going to have either of these two lose this match by pinfall. Ross called Snitsky a "dangerous psycho."

WINNER: Shelton at 4:40 via DQ so Shelton retained the IC Title.

STAR RATING: * -- Given the odd chemistry you'd expect with these two, it actually featured pretty good action packed into a short match.

[Commercial Break]

-The Eugene "Forrest Gump" spoof aired. Afterward, Lawler told Jim Ross that he heard Eugene just edged him (Ross) out for the role of Forrest Gump. Ross said it was true, but he has a thing against chocolate.

3 -- TAJIRI & WILLIAM REGAL vs. LA RESISTANCE (Robert Conway & Rene Dupree) -- World Tag Team Title match

Ross said La Resistance were exercising their return match clause. Ross said Eugene would be out of action several more months. Ross also mentioned how JBL should be concerned about his barbed wire cage match on Sunday, not Batista. The plugs for No Way Out on Raw fit the storyline but also should help the buyrate for the event a little. Regal finished off Conway with a running knee to the temple. It looked pretty stiff, yet the pin still seemed to come "out of nowhere."

WINNERS: Regal & Tajiri at 4:48 to retain the World Tag Team Titles.

STAR RATING: *

-They went to a camera outside the arena where they were waiting to see if JBL showed up.

[Commercial Break]

4 -- RANDY ORTON vs. CHRISTIAN

Ross said Orton was clear-eyed and ready for a fight. Orton got into a shouting match with Tomko at ringside at 3:30. At 4:30 Ross said Orton looked as sharp as he had in weeks. Christian backdropped Orton over the top rope and Orton hit the ground hard. Tomko threw Orton into the ringside stairs. Orton got cloudy eyed and groggy and they cut to a break. Ross said the referee didn't see it, but he could have heard the noise of the impact. I don't ever remember a wrestling announcer acknowledging the obvious - which is that referees who aren't looking at things such as chairshots and wrestlers being rammed into steps should at least turn around when they hear the impact. By acknowledging that, though, it opens up a can of worms the next time there's a chairshot five feet away from an otherwise preoccupied referee. Is Ross going to wonder out loud then why the ref didn't immediately turn around?

[Commercial Break]

At 11:30 both men were down on the mat after a groggy Orton whipped Christian hard into the corner turnbuckle. Both rose before ten and exchanged punches. Orton then hit Christian with a high dropkick and a clothesline followed by a backdrop and forearms to Christian chest from behind. The crowd counted along as Orton hit him about 20 times in a row. Nice spot. He then almost collapsed as he raised his arms to celebrate his flurry of offense. Orton fended off a Christian attempt at an Unprettier, then gave him a snap powerslam for a near fall. Orton hit a crossbody block off the top rope onto Christian for another near fall at 13:45. Christian sidestepped Orton and Orton flew into the ringpost. Christian scored a near fall, then went to rip the top turnbuckle off the corner. Tomko then entered the ring and nailed Orton with a boot to the face. Christian turned around and made the cover. Orton kicked out of a convincing near fall. Christian freaked out when he should have been following up on the nearly knocked out Orton. Orton came back with an inverted backbreaker, then signalled for the RKO. Christian blocked it at first, but Orton came back and hit it seconds later for the win.

WINNER: Orton at 15:42.

STAR RATING: ***1/4 -- Really good, competitive, back and forth match that hinted more at the concussion angle without overselling it. Orton looked tough in fending off interference from Christian, so they're making him look strong leading into wherever this angle is headed.

-Eric Bischoff was shown on a cell phone telling Teddy Long that he didn't appreciate his attempt to play games by sending JBL to Raw. He said he was looking forward to seeing Batista beat up "the best that Smackdown has to offer." Edge then walked up to Bischoff and said if Batista decides to sign to face JBL at WrestleMania, he deserves the vacated no. 1 contender's spot and he wants the title shot against Triple H. He said after he beats Batista next, Bischoff will have no choice by to award him the shot. Good segment at building up the TV main event and selling the idea that it's realistic that Batista might choose to jump to the Smackdown side to face JBL at WrestleMania. The average viewer has to at least question a little bit what champion Batista will choose to face at WM21.

[Commercial Break]

-As Trish Stratus walked to the ring, Lawler asked Ross if he thought he had a chance with her on Valentine's Day. Ross said Lawler is out of her demographic. Trish complained that the other Raw Divas are trying to steal her spotlight, especially with the Super Bowl ad stunt. "I don't care if you're Brittany Frickin' Spears, nobody is going to steal my spotlight, okay?" she said. She called Christy Hemme to the ring. Trish said fans can chant "slut" at her, but that term no longer applies to her. Trish said the reason is because Christy has agreed to pose naked in Playboy. Ross said, "That is good news. Congratulations, Christy!" You'd think she won the Nobel Peace Prize or announced she was getting married or volunteering for the Peace Corps or donating her Diva Contest winnings to a Tsunami charity. Christy smiled and said Trish's attempt to get her upset wasn't working because "I am so proud to be posing for Playboy and so proud people might want to see it." Christy followed by saying posing for Playboy doesn't make you slut, but sleeping with half the locker room does. Trish slapped Christy, then bailed out of the ring. Ross said Trish displayed blatant jealousy and congratulated Christy again. "We're proud of you," said Ross.

-Ross and Lawler gushed about their trip to Japan last week.

[Commercial Break]

5 -- KANE vs. SIMON DEAN

Before the match, Simon Dean told the fans before the match that if they didn't believe in him, he condemned them to a life of overweight gluttony and misery. He called the town "Cincifatti." (Hey, quit stealing Jericho's A-material.) Kane walked out and lifted Simon by his throat onto the ringside barrier. Simon slipped and fell. Kane threw Simon into the ring. Simon hit Kane with his bag of stuff. He then went looking for his powder. He took too long and Kane easily kicked it into his face. He followed up by spanking Simon with his weight lifting belt as the ref cleaned up the mess of stuff that came out of his bag. Kane nailed Simon with a boot to the face at ringside, then threw him back into the ring where he mocked Simon by doing some push-ups, then grabbing Simon by the throat and lifting him for a match-finishing chokeslam.

WINNER: Kane at 2:18.

STAR RATING: 1/4* -- Okay segment, but the match itself didn't amount to much.

[Commercial Break]

-Coach interviewed Shawn Michaels backstage. He held a Japanese wrestling magazine, claiming that Kurt Angle was bragging in an article about eliminating Michaels and making him bleed and tapout. He asked if he was aware of it. Michaels said he was aware of it. He said if he were to put himself in his position, he'd be focusing on his match on Sunday at No Way Out where he can become WWE Champion again. He said he can understand Angle's obsession with him since "I am a man with talent on loan from god" (stealing Rush Limbaugh's line). He concluded, "To answer your question, I am aware. Very aware." More planting of seeds for the Angle-Michaels match at WM, which very well could be Angle's final WWE match.

-Triple H talked with Batista backstage, asking him about wanting to handle things himself. Hunter told Batista that JBL isn't just coming at him. He is also spitting in the face of Evolution, "all of us." He said tonight Batista needs to concentrate on Edge, so when JBL arrives, he'll take care of it. Batista said, "It's not going to work that way. JBL has been calling me out, not Evolution. When JBL shows up tonight, one person is going to do something about it, and that's me." Hunter said as Batista walked away, "Don't worry big man, I've got your back."

[Commercial Break]

-Ross hyped next week's official WrestleMania Contract Signing for Batista with Eric Bischoff and Teddy Long present. The rating for that will be interesting to be sure. A lot of WWE officials will be hoping the rating pops as big as crowds at house shows have been for Batista.

6 -- BATISTA vs. EDGE

Someone in the crowd actually held up a sign that said "Earth Fears Planet Jarrett." There was also a "BWO" t-shirt in the crowd. How long do t-shirts last anyway? At 3:30 Batista powered out of a cool head vice lock that Edge applied. At 5:15 Edge went for a spear, but Batista caught him in mid-air with a spinebuster. Batista then gave Edge his sitdown BatistaBomb. Hunter walked into the ring and pointed at the big screen, which showed JBL's limo arriving.

WINNER: No contest at 5:45.

STAR RATING: *1/4

-Batista said JBL was making a big mistake and has a lot of nerve. Hunter trash-talked JBL, trying to work up Batista. When Hunter said, "Tonight, we take care of JBL," Batista stopped and yelled at Hunter to stay out of it. Batista yelled for Bradshaw. "You want me, here I am," he said. A white limo drove at Batista. Hunter dove at Batista, knocking him out of the way, and they both landed in a conspicuously placed pile of trash. An enraged Batista said, "It looks like I'm going to Smackdown this Thursday," he said as the show ended.

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We welcome your 1-10 score and comments on this show. To contribute your thoughts on Raw, click here.

KELLER'S STAR RATING QUALIFICATION KEY:

DUD: Not just below-average, but without redeeming qualities either due to incompetence, inexperience, lack of effort, or mistakes. A bad finish to a below-average match can also rate a DUD.

ONE STAR: Below average match, but passable.

TWO STARS: Average everyday match, usually between five and ten minutes, with nothing memorable about it, but nothing wrong with it. A shorter match can also earn two stars if it was better than average for five minutes, but didn't last long enough to justify a three star rating.

THREE STARS: Very good match, but lacking something to take it to the next level. It might be a match between two average wrestlers that overachieved or a match between two excellent wrestlers that underperformed. Contains some element that makes it stand out from a typical average match and it effectively fulfilled it purpose in the context of the rest of the show.

FOUR STARS: Excellent match, entering match of the year territory. Everything fell into place. Several elements of the match were dramatic or emotional enough to get the crowd into the action. In almost every case, a match needs to have a satisfying finish to rate four stars or higher. A poor finish can take what is otherwise a four-star match and drop below. It's tough to reach four stars unless a match goes past 15 minutes.

FIVE STARS: A rare masterpiece where the match transcends what is usually considered a great match. To rate five stars, there can't be one fault to the match - not a poor finish, or a poor start, or some missed moves, or inconsistent selling, or corny ref bumps, or tired cliched spots, or a dead crowd, or lack of emotions expressed by the wrestlers. Each segment of the match has to fit into the larger story of the match. It's tough for a match to reach five stars unless it lasts at least 20 minutes.

NOTE: Sometimes being the "first of a kind" can elevate a match rating, such as being the first ladder match or first Hell in a Cell or first TLC match or first War Games, making an excellent match better in it that incorporates a new match stipulation effectively. The same match two years later, after a gimmick is repeated over and over again, may have lost the novelty factor and thus not score five stars.

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