WWE Smackdown Report PARKS' WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT 8/30: Complete coverage of the Friday night show, including Orton vs. Christian for the World Title in a Steel Cage
Aug 31, 2011 - 12:11:33 AM
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WWE Smackdown review
August 30, 2011
Live from Wichita, Kansas
Aired on SYFY
By Greg Parks, PWTorch Columnist
- WWE Open.
- And we start with a commercial for this very show, plugging the two main event matches, as well as the CM Punk vs. Triple H contract signing. We need a moratorium on contract signings for a while.
- Smackdown Open.
- Of course they brought out the pyro for the Smackdown Supershow. Josh Mathews opened the show, talking about the “amazing concept” that is a show with Raw and Smackdown superstars. They’re playing fast and loose with the adjectives lately, even more so than usual.
- They showed the steel cage hanging over the ring and Michael Cole plugged Randy Orton vs. Christian for the World Title tonight.
- John Cena came out to open the show. I hope you’re happy, proponents of ending the brand split. Cena joked about being on Super Smackdown live on Tuesday, with his voice cracking as a nod to Tony Chimel. Cena said every wrestler from every show (including Shotgun Saturday Night, Nitro, Thunder, Smoky Mountain Wrestling, and other C-level shows). He said they even flew in some favorite XFL stars like….then he paused a while. Few people in the crowd yelled “He Hate Me.” Then Cena said the XFL was worse than the Shockmaster. No reaction for that. Let’s move this along, John. Cena then name-dropped Alberto Del Rio. He asked Del Rio to come out for a super beat-down on Super Smackdown. Del Rio’s music played and Ricardo Rodriguez walked out.
He came to the ring and Cena wanted to hurry things along, but instead, Rodriguez was out to deliver a message to Cena. He said Cena has to wait until Night of Champions to be honored to be in the same ring as Alberto Del Rio. He even repeated Del Rio’s name, with gusto, over and over. Cena yelled at him to shut up. He said Rodriguez sounds like two old cats trying to have sex and throw up at the same time. Ugh. Cena said he has a message for Rodriguez to give Del Rio, then he punched Rodriguez in the face. Ricardo rolled to ringside as Wade Barrett walked out. Cole called Cena a bully.
Barrett walked onto the stage and told Cena beating up the fat ring announcer really showed what a man he is. Cena said if he wanted to pick on a fat ring announcer, he’d beat up Tony Chimel. Barrett said Cena has learned none of the lessons he has tried to teach him and said Smackdown is his territory. He said he used to own Cena and when he’s done with him tonight, Cena will feel as pathetic as when he was Barrett’s personal slave. Cena reminded Barrett that this is the fans’ show. He pandered a bit more, and Barrett called it “pathetic.” Cena said what’s pathetic is mistaking Cena’s kindness for weakness. Cena said he owes Barrett some payback. And tonight, he’ll find out that payback’s a bitch. Barrett began to walk down the aisle, as one of the two main events begins next.
1 – JOHN CENA vs. WADE BARRETT
The bell rang immediately as the show returned form break. Cena attacked Barrett to start and landed the bulldog within 30 seconds. Take-down by Cena into a side headlock. Cena put his head down to early and Barrett kicked him, but Cena shook it off and Barrett found the mat again. Big splash in the corner by Cena, followed by a front slam. Barrett responded with a slam of his own for a two-count. After Barrett went on offense for a brief time, Cena came back with all of his pet moves. Five-Knuckle Shuffle, then an Attitude Adjustment.
WINNER: Cena, at 3:16. Not sure what this really accomplished. Beating Barrett at this point, and that quickly, only shows how far Barrett has fallen in the last year.
They showed Cena giving off some gear to military members at ringside, then they replayed the finish.
- Matt Striker was backstage with Mark Henry. Striker asked if Henry has any preference as to who he faces at Night of Champions. Henry said he didn’t care, then repeated his Hall of Pain quote from last night. Striker asked Henry what it’s like to be in a cage match. Henry told Striker it was a stupid question, then talked about the cage match being the most dangerous of all. Henry said it’s like being in a match with him. Then he said it’s like flipping a coin…either way, you lose. Not a bad promo at all.
- Cole plugged Ghost Hunters, coming up on Wednesday on SyFy, then they showed a clip of the show. Meh, I prefer Ghost Adventures.
- Back in the arena, Sin Cara came out. His match is next.
2 – SIN CARA vs. DANIEL BRYAN
Wasn’t Cara supposed to face Alberto Del Rio here? I thought they advertised that on Smackdown Friday night. Cara landed on his feet after a suplex attempt, then took Bryan down with a few arm-drags. Bryan with a single-leg dropkick that may have been a miscommunication. Bryan dove into Cara on the outside, going through the ropes to do so. Cover back in the ring, but not even a one-count. Kick to the chest by Cara, then a running dropkick in the corner. Surfboard by Bryan, and then he rocked it back into an inverted guillotine, with the legs still tied up. Bryan ran at Cara, but Cara dumped him over the top rope. Cara landed on the apron, then did a springboard cross-body to take Bryan down. Back in the ring, swanton dive for two. For those wondering, Sin Cara is still in Booker T’s Fave Five, at number four. I know there are people out there who would probably lose sleep if they didn’t know that. Both men went for a cross-body, so both went down hurting. Back suplex by Cara after some back-and-forth. Springboard swanton again, then a springboard moonsault for the win.
WINNER: Cara, at 5:00. Nice match that predictably was brought down by the commentary. Cole talks about how Bryan hasn’t won in a month…so he loses here. That’s no way to get a guy over.
After the match, cara shook Bryan’s hand, then kicked him in the head. That was unique. Referee Scott Armstrong admonished him as Cara stood over Bryan. Maybe the “real” Sin Cara comes back as a face to take on this evil version?
- Striker was backstage with Air Boom. Gosh, Evan Bourne really does sound like he’s reciting lines. Bourne said they’d ride this wave all the way. Kofi Kingston said he doesn’t trust anyone more than he does Bourne. Kofi brought up so old tag teams like Legion of Doom, Demolition, The Rockers, Harlem Heat. One of those teams does not belong. And what does it say when the only good tag teams they could come up with were from the early-to-late 90s? They finished with all three doing the “Boom Boom Boom” hand gesture.
- The contract signing between Triple H and CM Punk is still to come.
- They had a graphic that showed WWE Smackdown closing in on Gunsmoke for second place as the “longest running episodic television show in history.” Raw, of course, was in first, by a wide margin.
- The announcers plugged a WWE.com poll asking who has the advantage heading into tonight’s Steel Cage match between Orton and Christian.
- A video package aired on the Orton vs. Christian feud.
- Striker (earning his paycheck tonight) was backstage with Christian. Christian said this was his night, saying everyone has turned his back on him. He said he always fights for what’s right, then put down the hometown crowd for some cheap heat. He said he doesn’t need the World Title to validate his career…he simply wants it. And he always gets what he wants.
- Tony Chimel introduced Aksana as the special guest ring announcer for the following match. The jazz music played in the background too.
3 – NATALYA & BETH PHOENIX vs. KELLY KELLY & ALICIA FOX
So Fox is a babyface now. I must’ve missed that memo. Thesz Press right off the bat by Kelly. The announcers talked about Nattie beating up Fox after their tag match several weeks ago, but I’m not sure that constitutes a real “turn.” Beth tagged in and laid some punches in to Kelly’s head, then Nattie kicked her in the face while the referee was distracted. Kelly fought back and flipped out of a suplex. Tag to Fox, who went to the top. She kind of hurled her body through the air for what turned out to be a cross-body. Springboard back-elbow also connected. But Beth took Fox down with a clothesline and finished her with the Glam Slam.
WINNERS: Phoenix and Natalya, at 2:02. Nice showcase match for the Divas of Doom, as they needed to show something in the ring after being all talk for a while.
They showed a replay of the finish as Kelly checked on Fox.
- Triple H, contract in hand, walked down the hallway with Teddy Long at his side. The contract signing is next.
- Long was in the ring for the contract signing. The ring was full of the usual contract signing furniture. Triple H was introduced first. He took the mic and reminded fans that, last night, he canceled a match between Punk and Kevin Nash. Crowd booed that, interestingly. He said instead, he made a match of Punk vs. him. The crowd cheered that. Oh well. He said the Board of Directors allowed him to take off the suit for one match with Punk. He then told Punk to come out to make this official. Punk did so.
Punk said he found this a bit unnecessary, as Hunter has already made the match, so he was confused why they were here. He asked Triple H if he inserted a clause in the contract where he could change the match if he got cold feet again. Hunter said he understands he caught Punk off guard last night, but Punk fired back that nothing catches him off guard anymore. Hunter said he thought Punk made up in brains what he lacks in hygiene. That’s a strange comment. Punk kept trying to interrupt but Hunter told him to shut his mouth. He said that despite Punk disrespecting everyone and holding the company hostage, he tried to work with him. He said he bent over backward to work with Punk, but Punk just had to push. Hunter asked Punk who got Living Colour to allow Punk to use their music as his theme? It was him. And who approved Punk’s merchandise, his new “best in the world” shirt, while he wasn’t in the company? He said it was him. And even when he gave Punk Nash last night, he still pushed buttons. Triple H said he’s trying his ass off (his words, not mine) to be COO, but now Punk has to deal with him as a man.
Punk responded that he doesn’t want to fight the COO at Night of Champions – he wants the Cerebral Assassin, because the COO sucks. Punk said maybe Hunter isn’t the ring guy, because the last COO couldn’t separate personal issues from business, the same as the new COO. Punk said he doesn’t hate the WWE, he loves it. If he hated it, he wouldn’t be sitting there now, he’d be home, a lot happier. If he wasn’t there, Hunter would be happier too. But Punk said he wanted things to be better, not for himself but for everyone. He said he’s dying for a change and he wants to be the catalyst. Hunter said Punk wants to be the catalyst as long as it benefits him. He said some fans may agree with him, but others actually like the WWE. He said people tune in every week and like what they see. Can it be better? Sure. But Punk will only accept change if he’s on top. He said Punk is like everyone else in this business, including him, but the only difference is Hunter came out and said what he was going to do. But Punk tried to make himself a martyr.
Punk said he’s not trying to step on people or be a martyr, but maybe he is. He said if half the people like WWE and half don’t, he wants everyone to like it. Punk said at his core, he’s still a fan, and he’ll do what he can to make WWE better and fun again. Punk said he talks about Stephanie because it’s fun. He said he tried texting Hunter when he became COO as a test, but Hunter failed. He said Trips is egotistical and vindictive, and he hires his friends to do his dirty work. Punk said he’s seen it before. Punk said the two of them have been a long time coming, since they’ve never liked each other. Punk signed the contract and asked Hunter not to fine or suspend him after he kicks his ass at Night of Champions.
Hunter said he respects Vince McMahon for what he’s done and said they wouldn’t be standing there if it weren’t for Vince, so if Punk wants to compare them, that’s fine. Punk said he respects Vince so much, he’s living in the past and can’t see the future. He said Hunter has lost touch, pointing to his crotch telling others to suck it, and he wants change. Hunter signed the contract and said the difference between he and Vince is that Vince would’ve taken a beating at N.O.C because it was good for business. But Hunter said it’s personal between them and promised to kick Punk’s skinny fat ass at Night of Champions. Then the NWO music hit. Long left the ring and Hunter tried to hold Punk back from Nash, who was making a bee-line for the ring. He entered it, flipped the table, and Punk went after him with kicks and punches. Hunter threw Punk off of Nash and Nash gave Punk a big boot. Hunter shoved Nash, so Nash shoved Hunter, who took a bump. Hunter was shocked as Nash left the ring. Cole said Hunter has lost complete control.
- Tonight, it’s Orton vs. Christian for the World Title in a Steel Cage.
- Plus next, Sheamus faces Great Khali. That’s next.
- They showed a clip of Nash walking backstage during the break. Striker approached him to ask about what happened, but Nash didn’t answer and just walked away.
4 – THE GREAT KHALI vs. SHEAMUS
Khali took Sheamus down and booted him in the corner. Sheamus once again had the ribs taped. Chop in the corner by Khali, then another. Sheamus attacked the knees of Khali, then hooked Khali in the rope and pelted him with forearm shots. Knee-lift followed that. He went to the top and took Khali down with a diving shoulder tackle. Sheamus set up for the Brogue Kick when Jinder Mahal interfered. That caused the DQ.
WINNER: Sheamus, via DQ, at 2:48. Interesting that they didn’t beat Khali clean here, given that he submitted to Zeke Jackson last week, and Jackson is certainly lower on the totem pole than Sheamus.
Khali continued beating on Sheamus after the match, but missed a Khali chop, hitting the ring post instead. Sheamus gave Khali the Brogue Kick, but Mahal went after Sheamus. He threw the Irishman into the ring, but walked into an Irish Hammer. High Cross by Sheamus finished the segment.
- They again plugged Orton vs. Christian, as well as the WWE.com poll relating to the match.
- They showed the exterior of the arena in Wichita, then sent it to the trailer of Triple H’s “Inside Out.”
- The announcers talked on-camera about the movie, then they talked about who has the advantage in the steel cage match. Fans said Orton, 85% to 15%. Cole described the match, then the cage lowered.
- A video package aired previewing Randy Orton’s DVD, available next Tuesday.
5 – CHRISTIAN vs. RANDY ORTON – STEEL CAGE MATCH FOR THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP
Christian tried to escape through the door early on, then went to climb out the cage about 26 seconds in. Orton stopped him and Christian was dropkicked as he came off the top rope. Orton went for a pin, getting two. They went to break :54 in.
Back at 4:16 of the match. Orton flew out of the corner with a clothesline on Christian. Mathews said it had been back-and-forth throughout the break. Christian went to the top rope to try to escape, and Orton slammed him off. RKO was dodged by Christian, but he ended up falling victim to a back body-drop. Orton called for the door to be opened, but Christian put a stop to that. Christian blocked a DDT attempt and back-dropped Orton into the cage. Christian wiped Orton’s skull against the cage, but Orton was able to stop Christian from leaving the cage. Roll-up by Orton for two and a spinebuster by Christian for two. Christian slowed things down and hit a neck-breaker for two. Christian almost walked out, but Orton pulled him back in. Christian made it to the top of the cage at 8:10, but Orton pulled him back into the ring and they fought on the top rope. Orton connected on a superplex. They went to break a second time at 8:47.
Back at 11:45 with Christian crawling toward the cage. Orton grabbed him by the foot to prevent Christian’s win. Orton tossed Christian hard into the cage, head-first. Booker said Orton was going for the “coup d’etat,” I’m sure meaning to say “coup de grace.” Powerslam by Orton. Christian climbed to the top, Orton caught him, then Orton was shoved off and to the mat. Christian opted to go for the frog splash and pin but only got two. Orton again intercepted Christian from going through the door. Christian set up for the Spear, but Orton leap-frogged it. RKO was countered into a spear for two. Christian stood over Orton, then appeared to want to go for a punt kick. Orton dodged it, Christian faked a sunset flip and Orton was ready for an RKO off of it. Instead, Christian tried to climb out the cage. Suplex into a neck-breaker by Orton for two. DDT by Orotn, but the RKO was countered. At 17:28, Christian and Orton battled atop the cage. Christian went for an Unprettier off the top, but Orton blocked that. He bounced Christian’s head off the cage, then hit an RKO off the top rope. Both men were down, but Orton was able to crawl over and make the pin.
WINNER: Orton, at 18:35.
After the match, Henry came out. He went inside the cage and went after Orton. He threw Orton into the cage, but on a second time, Orton snuck out the back. He couldn’t do much though, as Henry clotheslined him down then splashed him. He then followed with a World’s Strongest Slam. He took the title from the referee and held it above his head as the show went off the air.
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Greg Parks has been covering WWE Smackdown for PWTorch.com since January of 2007. Follow him on Twitter @gregmparks for live Tweeting during Raw, Impact, and PPVs, as well as other bits of wisdom. Comments, questions and feedback are welcome, and can be sent to email@example.com.
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