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The following was originally published on PWTorch.com five years ago this week…
WWE Raw TV Results
May 6, 2013 – Episode #1,040
Live in Roanoke, Va.
Aired on USA Network
Report by James Caldwell, PWTorch assistant editor
This week’s live Raw episode started with ominous video of Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman storming WWE Corporate headquarters earlier today. They used surveillance video to make it look like an office invasion. Plus, WWE champion John Cena’s title is in jeopardy due to Ryback.
Live in the arena, Michael Cole quickly introduced the show before John Cena’s music played to a huge reaction. Cena came out on-stage and threw a thumbs up to the cameraman before noting he’s better than he was last week. Cena then stormed the ring and hoisted the WWE Title belt in the air to a huge reaction. This sounds like a pro-Cena crowd tonight.
In the ring, Cena placed the title belt on the mat, blew on his knuckles, posed for the hard camera, and saluted the crowd to another strong reaction. Once Cena’s music stopped, some boos were heard, but mainly cheers. Cena surveyed the crowd before noting there is unrest tonight. Cena said he’s going to take the time to answer questions by using Daniel Bryan’s Playbook since he is the master of the Iron Arts.
“Yes!” Cena shouted. Competing in the Raw main event last week was probably not a good decision. “No!” Cena shouted. The injury will not prevent him from defending the WWE Title against Ryback at Extreme Rules. “Yes!” He was confused by Ryback’s intentions last week. “Yes!” Ryback is ready to Do The Fandango. “No!” The photo of him and Betty White is photoshopped. He threw in a thinly-veiled masturbation joke before getting serious that he is the current WWE champion. So, as long as he is medically cleared, he will get in this ring and do his best every single week. Cena said he hasn’t been 100 percent since 2002, but that will not stop him from defending the title.
Suddenly, Vickie Guerrero interrupted to loud boos. Vickie said that as the managing supervisor of Raw, she is so excited that Cena will defend the WWE Title at Extreme Rules. However, this PPV will not be ordinary, but extreme. For example, Triple H will face Brock Lesnar in a steel cage match. And, Dolph Ziggler will defend the World Title in a triple-threat ladder match. So, Cena needs to be aware that his title match will be extreme. Vickie then brought out Ryback for a discussion of their match stipulation at Extreme Rules.
Ryback cockily marched down to the ring to stare down Cena while Vickie stood between them. Vickie then gave Cena the mic first to discuss what stipulation he would like for Extreme Rules. Cena sarcastically thanked Vickie before saying perhaps it should be a match where the winner is the one who runs away from the ring like a little girl. But, that wouldn’t be fair to him. Cena then mocked Ryback’s machine-like voice and snorting, sounding like Ultimate Warrior. Classic “Cena runs down the Heel of the Month” moment. Cena then mocked Vickie using a grannypanties joke before saying he just wants to fight and shut up the World’s Biggest Complainer.
Vickie continued that she did not appreciate Ryback walking out on her main event last week, but Cena is giving him the floor to pick the stipulation. Ryback said Cena was extremely stupid for giving him the stipulation option. Ryback paced the ring before accusing Cena of his pride and ego being his real Achilles Heel. Ryback said in two weeks he will exploit both Cena’s personal and physical weaknesses…in a Last Man Standing match. Ryback snorted, then left the ring as Cena tried to sell concern in the ring.
Announcers: Cole, Jerry Lawler, and JBL sold concern for Cena’s health facing a LMS match in two weeks. They transitioned to a discussion of the Triple H vs. Brock Lesnar angle that took place at WWE Corporate earlier in the day. Cole played this up like an actual news report; Lawler said it was a scary situation when Lesnar and Heyman crashed the lobby. Still to come, Cole advertised reaction from Triple H.
[Q2] Backstage: Randy Orton was shown walking down the hallway. Cole referenced an event on Smackdown, saying Orton is seeking revenge on Damien Sandow, who attacked him after their match on Friday.
[Commercial Break]
Back from break, Cole reinforced Cena vs. Ryback in a Last Man Standing match at Extreme Rules in two weeks.
In-ring: Randy Orton was completing his pose in the ring as his music finished up. Cole then flashed back to last Friday on Smackdown when Orton RKO’ed Damien Sandow for the win before Big Show interrupted. As Orton eyed Show, Sandow attacked Orton from behind. Back live, Damien Sandow was introduced to the ring. Sandow, alone, requested silence before introducing a song. Sandow sang about Orton putting him to sleep, his expressions never changing, doing his lame pose, disgusting tattoos, heinous oil, and beating this ignoramus. Orton was not moved by this song, which was apparently designed to light a fire under Orton?…or someone behind-the-scenes is mad with Orton.
1 — RANDY ORTON vs. DAMIEN SANDOW
Orton quickly wanted a DDT, but Sandow bailed to the floor. So, Orton smashed Sandow with a clothesline on the outside. Orton then wanted a DDT on the floor, but Sandow ran Orton back-first into the guardrail. Back in the ring, Orton ducked a clothesline and delivered a backbreaker. Uppercut, then Orton continued the assault. Orton decided to put Sandow back-first on the mat to begin stomping him, but it was only good for a two count. Orton in control heading to break.
[Commercial Break]
Back from break, Sandow was in control working on a headlock. Sandow delivered a side Russian Legsweep, then wanted the Elbow of Disdain and connected. Orton suddenly exploded out of the corner with a clothesline into a snap powerslam. Orton summoned the crowd’s energy before stalking Sandow, who answered with an elbow to the face. Orton then intercepted a second-rope move with a dropkick.
[Q3] Orton followed up with a second-rope DDT, then entered That Place to get ready for the RKO, which the crowd wanted. Orton and Sandow had a miscommunication executing the finishing spot, so Orton just RKO’ed Sandow. Orton covered Sandow for the win and did not flip out in the process.
WINNER: Orton at 9:20.
After a replay of the RKO finisher, Orton was shown leaving to the stage as Cole noted Orton wants to get back on-track winning titles and big matches again. He said Orton has seemingly been a different guy since WrestleMania.
Suddenly, there was activity on the stage, according to Cole, who was on-camera. They cut to the stage, where Big Show was standing over Orton after reportedly KO’ing him. Cole said he looked up and saw Show take out Orton. They cut to a replay from a different camera of Show blindsiding Orton with the KO Punch that put Orton flat on his back. Refs then spilled out to check on Orton, who returned to consciousness.
Still to come: World champ Dolph Ziggler vs. Alberto Del Rio in a re-match from the night after WrestleMania when Ziggler captured the World Title from Del Rio.
Backstage: Fandango was shown practicing his dance moves with his original brunette dancer. The announcers said Fandango is up next against R-Truth.
[Commercial Break]
Back live, Chris Jericho’s music played. Fandango imitation and/or mockery? No, it was actually Jericho returning to Raw for a surprise appearance. Michael Cole sold as if it were a regular old occurrence, then dryly recapped the Jericho-Fandango feud. In the ring, Jericho smiled for the crowd before mocking Fandango’s name. He said he has put together a judging panel to evaluate Fandango’s dance performance tonight. Jericho then introduced his judges – Tons of Funk’s music played and JBL quipped that the first 400 people were apparently busy.
Sweet T, Brodus Clay, Cameron, and Naomi danced down to the ring and joined Jericho ringside to judge Fandango’s dancing. Sweet, Chris, and Clay sat down at a separate judge’s table next to the announcers, then Fandango’s original dancer brought out Fandango on-stage. WWE cut to a shot of a few fans in the crowd dancing along to the music as Fandango and Co. very slowly made their way to the ring. Fandango and his dancer very slowly held their pose, then Clay and T held up “2” cards. Jericho looked through his cards, then held up a “1.”
On the mic, Fandango asked “Christopher” who he is to judge him. Just because Jericho competed and failed on Dancing with the Stars doesn’t make Fandango an expert. R-Truth’s music then played to bring out Truth to “sing and dance,” according to Cole. As Truth hit the ring, JBL summed up the post-Mania Raw season: “We dance on Monday nights.” As opposed to “fight on Friday nights” and compete in meaningful matches.
[Q4]
2 — FANDANGO vs. R-TRUTH
Truth quickly face-planted Fandango with a suplex before dancing in Fandango’s face. Truth then nailed an axe kick that sent Fandango rolling to the outside. Back in the ring, Truth danced, prompting Jericho, T, and Clay to hold up “10” cards. JBL said that is too much. Fandango had enough of this and decided to leave. Fandango was counted out, giving Truth the win, as Jericho smugly held up a “0” card.
WINNER: R-Truth via count-out at 1:36. Perhaps this deal explains why Cole sold zero emotion when Jericho returned to Raw.
Announcers: Cole tried to get serious again, calling Lesnar and Heyman’s deal with Triple H a “workplace invasion.” This is entering heavy-handed territory. WWE cut to still-shots of Heyman and Lesnar entering the executive wing of WWE offices earlier today. Cole advertised Heyman appearing via satellite tonight and Hunter addressing the events later on.
[Commercial Break]
Pre-Taped Video: Triple H, as Paul Levesque, talked on-camera about WWE’s renewed partnership with Susan G. Komen. They cut to shots of Hunter and Stephanie McMahon dancing in a still-shot. More family shots. Hunter asked the audience to make a donation.
Announcers: Cole and Lawler added color to the WWE/Susan G. partnership, then WWE cut to footage from last Friday on Smackdown when Ryback defeated Daniel Bryan after a hard-fought match. Later in the show, Bryan was assaulted by The Shield.
Backstage: Josh Mathews brought in Bryan for reaction to Shield attacking him on Smackdown. Bryan sarcastically said he’s feeling real good. He said Shield likes to throw out the word “justice,” but they cannot justify their actions taking him out last week. Bryan then booked himself in a re-match against “The Ryback.” Ryback interrupted and told Bryan that he is no condition for a re-match. Ryback told him he should be familiar with his answer: No. Ryback said even if Bryan were healthy, he would destroy him again.
Kane then slapped Ryback on the shoulder and spun him around. Kane stared down at Ryback and asked about him. Ryback looked him up and down, then said Kane is not the monster he once was. He said there is only one monster in WWE. Ryback Rules. Ryback left, then Kane seethed as he checked with Bryan.
On-stage: Ricardo Rodriguez came out on-stage to introduce Alberto Del Rio, which this crowd sang along with. Del Rio emerged on-stage and marched down to the ring with Ricardo leading to commercial.
[Commercial Break]
Back from break, the announcers made it official for later in the show – Ryback vs. Kane in a singles match.
In-ring: Dolph Ziggler’s music played to bring out the World Hvt. champion flanked by A.J. Lee and Big E. Langston. The trio then bounced down to the ring as WWE replayed events from last Friday on Smackdown when the World Title issue blew up. Lots of Smackdown replays tonight, so apparently someone in WWE was listening to last Thursday’s Livecast.
[Q5 — second hour]
3 — World Hvt. champion DOLPH ZIGGLER (w/A.J. Lee, Big E. Langston) vs. ALBERTO DEL RIO — non-title match
Del Rio and Ziggler exchanged control, then Del Rio kicked Ziggler in the left shoulder to continue setting up for the cross arm-breaker. Ziggler responded with a one-arm suplex, though, then used his good arm to pound away at Del Rio’s upper body. Del Rio responded with body shots before knocking Ziggler to the outside.
Suddenly, Jack Swagger’s music played to bring out Swagger and Zeb Colter for a closer look at the action. Cole noted that at least Zeb changed his vest this week. Del Rio was angered by their presence, then Swagger and Zeb stopped to have a chat with Big E., who presented himself as a roadblock. Swagger and Zeb then walked around Big E. to join the announce position. Meanwhile, Ziggler continued to sell on the outside as Del Rio angrily argued with the ref about the interruption leading to break.
[Commercial Break]
Back from break, Ziggler was working on a headlock while Zeb joined the commentary discussion. Ziggler then snapped off a leaping dropkick that wowed the crowd, but it was only good for a nearfall. Ziggler slowed down the pace working on Del Rio as Zeb argued with Lawler and Cole on commentary. Back in the ring, Del Rio face-dropped Ziggler to get some breathing room. Del Rio then tried a corner enziguiri, but missed. Except, that when he missed, he accidentally hit Ziggler in the head on the way down. So, Del Rio covered Ziggler for a two count.
As Ziggler continued to sell the head blow, Del Rio went for a suplex, but Ziggler countered with a neckbreaker for a two count. Ziggler, still selling the left shoulder, then slowly climbed to the corner, allowing Del Rio to crotch him. Meanwhile, the announcers and Zeb mocked the French on commentary. Back in the ring, Del Rio grappled Ziggler for a reverse facebuster off the top turnbuckle and connected. But, Del Rio could not follow up, allowing Ziggler to deliver another neckbreaker to get some breathing room.
[Q6] Del Rio suddenly fired off successive offense before nailing Ziggler with a standing sidekick. Del Rio covered, but Ziggler escaped a pin attempt. Del Rio wanted the cross arm-breaker and he applied it in-full. But, A.J. hopped on the ring apron to distract the ref, then Big E. yanked Del Rio out of the ring and chucked Del Rio into Swagger’s lap. The ref threw out the match, then Swagger flipped out by destroying Big E. and Del Rio.
Post-match, Swagger pulled out a ladder, then Ricardo Rodriguez tried to hop on Swagger’s back, but Swagger destroyed him. Swagger then brought the ladder into the ring and destroyed Ziggler with it. Del Rio wanted some of Swagger, but Swagger chucked the ladder at Del Rio. Zeb then entered the ring and clapped up Swagger, who stood tall in the ring before leaving. WWE replayed Swagger’s path of destruction as the announcers wondered aloud if they could be looking at a new World champion.
WINNER: No Contest at 14:53. They really endorsed Swagger here, while continuing to make Ziggler look even more vulnerable as champ.
Earlier Tonight: Ryback confronted John Cena and booked them in a Last Man Standing match for the WWE Title at Extreme Rules.
Announcers: Cole, Lawler, and JBL talked more about the Lesnar-Hunter business from earlier in the day when Lesnar and Paul Heyman “invaded” WWE Headquarters. Lawler noted Lesnar entered Triple H’s office and destroyed it, then Cole plugged footage still to come tonight.
Still to come: Ryback vs. Kane in tonight’s main event.
[Commercial Break]
Announcers: Jerry Lawler said he can’t wait to see the footage of Triple H’s office being destroyed. Really? Isn’t Lawler the face color commentator? Cole then fed to a video package on WWE’s new content deal with Yahoo. This included on-camera comments from Stephanie McMahon on Raw’s new pre-show this summer.
Backstage: Kaitlyn was shown talking to Cameron and Naomi. Suddenly, a boing-boing noise was heard. It was Kaitlyn’s phone. Apparently the secret-admirer sent her a message. Cam and Naomi warned Kaitlyn about getting too close to the secret guy. Natalya walked in and Kaitlyn read a message with Simpsons quotes. Natalya then brought in Great Khali to suggest he go into the men’s locker room to find out who the secret-admirer is. “I’m stooge?” Khali asked, prompting Lawler to lose it on commentary. Khali figured out the plan, then walked off. After the Divas walked off, the Bellas emerged behind a curtain and smiled.
Arena: The Shield’s music played to “end the fun and games,” according to the announcers. Cole said they are in six-man tag action tonight, then noted they are undefeated as a unit. More Smackdown replays, this time of Shield boasting that they put down Undertaker, then Shield took out Daniel Bryan, then triple-powerbombed Kane. Back in the arena, Shield stood tall leading to break.
[Q7] [Commercial Break]
Back from break, the Usos and U.S. champion Kofi Kingston were in the ring. The bell sounded to begin the six-man tag match.
4 — THE SHIELD (DEAN AMBROSE & ROMAN REIGNS & SETH ROLLINS) vs. THE USOS & U.S. champion KOFI KINGSTON — six-man tag match
Shield quickly took apart Uso while the announcers endorsed Shield’s undefeated streak as a trio. Lawler said he doesn’t think they will be able to stay undefeated, though, to which JBL responded that they have faced every top Superstar in a three-man match, and have defeated all of the combinations. Shield continued to isolate Uso, who suddenly responded with a Samoan Drop on Rollins. Kofi then hot-tagged into the match as Ambrose entered.
Kofi ran over Ambrose with strikes and kicks, then dropkicked Reigns off the ring apron. Kofi wanted the Boom Drop on Ambrose, and he connected. Kofi then cross-body-splashed Ambrose, but Reigns broke up a pin. Chaos broke out before Reigns destroyed Uso on the outside with a clothesline. Back in the ring, Kofi wanted a top-rope move on Ambrose, but Rollins shoved Kofi down to the mat. Ambrose then spiked Kofi into the mat with a DDT of sorts for the pin and the win. Cole called them “Money” Mayweather, staying undefeated.
WINNERS: Shield at 6:41. Shield gave up a lot of offense to a lower-card tag team and a mid-card champion put together for a makeshift match.
Announcers: Back to Cole and Co., who recapped the “chaotic scene” at WWE HQ earlier today. More WWE employees got their name on television “tweeting photos” of the scene. WWE showed a photo of Hunter’s office after it was destroyed by Lesnar.
Still to come: Ryback vs. Kane in the main event.
[Commercial Break]
[Q8] Wednesday on Main Event: Randy Orton vs. Antonio Cesaro, complete with a match-up graphic.
In-ring: Antonio Cesaro was introduced to the ring. Cesaro was dressed in a French painter’s hat with aviators. Apparently this is WWE’s latest bright idea for Cesaro’s look. Already in the ring was Zack Ryder. Before the match started, WWE replayed Kofi beating Cesaro to retain the U.S. Title on Main Event, then Cesaro jumping Kofi from behind in the hallway and ripping out Kofi’s hair.
6 — ANTONIO CESARO vs. ZACK RYDER
As the match started, Cole plugged Heyman’s footage coming up after the match. Cesaro quickly dismantled Ryder as Lawler said at least Cesaro did not yodel tonight. Cesaro beat down Ryder in the corner as one single fan in the crowd shouted, “Let’s Go Ryder,” over and over and over. About ten fans joined in echoing, “Woo, Woo, Woo.” Ryder then found an opening and attempted a corner attack, but Cesaro intercepted with a European Uppercut. Cesaro then nailed the Neutralizer for an easy pin and the win.
Post-match, Cesaro took the mic. He asked if that’s all the competition WWE has for him tonight because if so, it’s absolutely ridiculous. Because he is Antonio Cesaro and he puts the “W” in “WWE.” Which “W?” Cesaro said there is no one in this company, no one in NXT, no one on Slam, Main Event, Superstars, Main Event, or Raw who can hold a candle to what he can do in this ring. Cesaro slammed down the mic, then left the ring.
WINNER: Cesaro at 2:02. Okay, Cesaro back on track. Will it last more than one week?
Announcers: Cole and Co. plugged Paul Heyman’s version of events coming up on the other side of the break. But, first, security-cam footage of Heyman and Lesnar entering WWE HQ, forcing themselves in the building, approaching Triple H’s office, and scattering employees.
“Live Via Satellite,” Heyman was shown being mic’ed up for an interview next.
[Commercial Break]
“Air Bourne” is the theme song for Extreme Rules. Evan Bourne teaser?
-Heyman/Lesnar-Hunter Segment: Back in the arena, Justin Roberts introduced Paul Heyman appearing “live via satellite.” On-camera, Heyman introduced himself as the advocate for Brock Lesnar. Heyman then introduced footage of Brock Lesnar at WWE HQ earlier today.
In the video shot by Heyman, Heyman was shown introducing the footage from outside WWE “World Headquarters.” Brock Lesnar was then shown entering the building with Heyman following his every move. Lesnar entered the building and Heyman mocked the Extreme Rules poster featuring Sheamus and an Andre the Giant statue. Heyman then yelled at the receptionist, who asked if they have an appointment. To the fourth floor they went. In the elevator, Lesnar angrily stared down an unsuspecting employee, who got off the elevator as quickly as possible. Heyman said no one seems happy who works here.
They got off the elevator and glared at some employees before walking down the hallway toward Triple H’s office. Heyman paused for Lesnar to glare down The Rock on a PPV poster. Heyman then noted there is not one poster of Brock Lesnar in this hallway. They stopped at the board room and Heyman said that will be a lovely place when Hunter and Stephanie McMahon take over. They kept walking down the hallway before stopping at Triple H’s office, where “Paul Levesque” was on the door.
[HOUR THREE]
[Q9 — third hour] Heyman and Lesnar entered the office area, surprising a lady sitting in the office. Heyman said she is much prettier than Stephanie, then Lesnar shoved down a male assistant. Lesnar then barged into Hunter’s office and Lesnar surveyed the various photos on the wall. Lesnar grabbed Hunter’s World Title belt, unstrapped the belt, put it over his shoulder, and sat down in Hunter’s office chair.
Lesnar then destroyed Hunter’s laptop and tossed it aside. Next was a Brock Smash to the desktop computer keyboard. Lesnar then grabbed a sledgehammer hanging on Hunter’s office wall and used the hammer to destroy the desk. Lesnar then began chucking furniture and smashing glass. Heyman said this is how Hunter is going to look at Extreme Rules. Lesnar surveyed the scene, then said he thinks he’s done. Heyman then placed a business card on Hunter’s destroyed desk. Lesnar left the office as Heyman laughed to himself.
Back to the satellite interview, Heyman said he’s not sure how many of the people are aware of his history, but he’s associated with the word “extreme.” Heyman said ironically he’s become the voice of reason trying to calm down Lesnar and discourage him from causing further destruction. But, now, things are different after Hunter decided to Pedigree him on national TV. Heyman said he’s no longer going to discourage Lesnar, but encourage Lesnar. And he will do that by begging Lesnar to hurt Triple H inside the steel cage. Heyman said he will plead with his client to exploit the opportunity that only an old-school steel cage match can provide. Heyman said that Lesnar is going to take Triple H to the extreme. And then, Brock is going to go further and further and further and further and further and further and further…
Suddenly, Triple H’s music played live in the arena. Hunter came out on-stage with his shirt sleeves rolled up, a leather jacket on top of the rolled-up sleeves, and black jeans on. As Heyman remained on the Titantron, Hunter marched to the ring and glared toward the Tron with a few words in-mind for Heyman. First was mockery of Heyman’s hair. Second, does Heyman ever open his mouth without a bunch of crap coming out of it? Next, Hunter said he knows something about extreme, being the founding father of DX. Hunter said he tore through the Attitude Era and also the guy who knocked Heyman’s monster, Brrrrock Lesssnar, out cold at WrestleMania.
Hunter said he is not for one second buying this crap that on a Monday he decided to go to WWE HQ when everyone knows he’s at Raw. Heyman tried to answer, but Hunter told him to shut up. Hunter said Heyman wants to destroy his office and intimidate office people, but he doesn’t care. He said he has two offices (the bathroom?) and he’s standing in his other office. That being the ring. Hunter said this one has a great view and this office is more like his home. Because this office – this home – is where he grew up and became a man, something Lesnar never became.
Hunter said if Lesnar has something to say to him, then have Lesnar say it to his face. Hunter said if Lesnar thinks he will destroy his real office like his other office, then has a warning for Lesnar. “In this office, I fight back,” Hunter said in conclusion. Hunter then posed for an appreciative crowd before leaving the ring.
End of Act II. This felt like the first segment of the show that really counted for something (which ignores the Cena-Ryback opening segment that felt more like one of Cena’s overly-carefree bits not taking his current opponent seriously). Of course, Hunter dismissed the entire angle the same way every other top babyface blows everything off as not affecting them.
[Q10] [Commercial Break]
In-ring: A.J. Lee’s music played to bring out A.J. and the Bella Twins for a six-Divas tag match. A.J. skipped down to the ring, while the Bellas followed from a distance. Cole then plugged the Bellas starring in “Total Divas,” which starts this July on E! This led to a video package promoting the new show. After the video aired, Divas champion Kaitlyn and Cameron & Naomi were introduced as the face trio. Before the bell sounded, Cole randomly read a plug for The Rock’s App with a new update.
7 — A.J. LEE & BELLA TWINS vs. Divas champion KAITLYN & CAMERON & NAOMI — six-Divas tag match
Waiting for a Great Khali “stooge” sighting here. A.J. started in control of the action before Cameron escaped and tagged in Kaitlyn. Kaitlyn stalked A.J., who slapped her former best friend. That was enough for Kaitlyn, who smashed A.J. and pinned her for the win.
WINNERS: Team Kaitlyn at 2:48.
Backstage: Mark Henry was shown walking down the hallway. He has a message for Sheamus up next.
[Commercial Break]
Coming back from break, Diddy provided an anti-bulling P.S.A., focusing on online bullying. Diddy said it has to stop.
-Henry-Sheamus Segment: In-ring: Mark Henry’s music played to bring out Henry, whose presence filled the entire camera shot. Henry marched to the ring as Cole recapped the Henry-Sheamus issues from the past few weeks, then JBL accused Sheamus of taking cheap-shots at Henry. Cole said Henry started it.
[Q11] In the ring, Henry said Sheamus is going to come out here in a couple of minutes (cheers) and he’s going to act real tough, but that’s the problem. He’s acting. Henry said he doesn’t have to act because he is tough. He said he will show what happens when Sheamus (what?), when Sheamus (what?!), when Sheamus (what?!?!) – “You’re all a bunch of puppets,” Henry said – when Sheamus meets the World’s Strongest Man again. They cut to footage from last month when Henry destroyed Sheamus in separate backstage attacks.
Back in the ring, Henry asked the camera to zoom in real close because if Sheamus has any pride in that pasty body, he will face him at Extreme Rules. Henry paused and said it’s been a long time since he got extreme, but, Sheamus, he promises people will remember this match…for the rest of existence. Henry said he has a special wing —
Suddenly, Sheamus’s music played. Sheamus came out pounding his chest, then marched down to the ring to confront Henry. Sheamus asked Mark how he’s doing, then said he came out here because that video was missing something. Sheamus, with a yellow mark under his eye that was apparently a shiner (or ill-placed highlighter ink), pointed to the Tron to show video of Sheamus using dirty tactics to “outsmart” Henry.
Back in the ring, Henry was not amused. Henry said Sheamus is full of jokes, but he better be serious when they meet at Extreme Rules. Sheamus replied that just because Henry is big and strong doesn’t give him the right to walk around like an angry bear. Sheamus said that at Extreme Rules, his business is him. Henry then told Sheamus he doesn’t have to wait for Extreme Rules and threw down his mic.
Sheamus removed his t-shirt and they circled the ring, but Wade Barrett’s music interrupted. Cole said they already have a match scheduled right now between Sheamus and Wade Barrett. Cole said he thinks Henry was talking tough because he knew Sheamus already had an engagement with Barrett.
[Commercial Break]
8 — IC Champion WADE BARRETT vs. SHEAMUS — non-title match
The match was joined in progress with Barrett working on a headlock. Meanwhile, Mark Henry was on commentary sitting next to fellow Texan, JBL. Henry told Cole to shut up as Sheamus made a comeback in the ring. Henry then told Bradshaw to carry this as Sheamus delivered ten forearms to Barrett’s chest. Barrett found himself on the floor, then Sheamus teased chucking Barrett into Henry, but pulled away. Henry, having freaked out in his chair, angrily stood up and walked right into a Brogue Kick from Sheamus.
Back in the ring, Sheamus climbed to the top rope and shoulder-tackled Barrett for a nearfall. Meanwhile, medics checked on Henry, who sold the effects of the Brogue Kick to the floor. Barrett then blasted Sheamus with consecutive kick strikes as the announcers offered a “snooker” vs. “Snookie” exchange. Back in the ring, Barrett wanted the Bullhammer, but Sheamus ducked and nailed White Noise. Sheamus wanted the Brogue Kick, and he connected square in the mouth. Sheamus covered and it was good for the win.
WINNER: Sheamus at 4:38. Rough night for the Intercontinental champion.
Post-match, Mark Henry stormed the ring immediately after the bell with a belt in his possession. Henry proceeded to whip Sheamus’s exposed back over and over again. Lawler said he thinks Henry got the belt from one of the medics. To the floor they went, where Henry whipped Sheamus. “Tell me a joke,” Henry amazingly said in-between whips. “I don’t hear you. Get your ass up.” Henry then finished Sheamus’s night with World’s Strongest Slam. “How funny is that?!” Henry shouted toward the front row.
[Q12] On the way out, Henry whipped the guardrail to scare away front-row fans. WWE then replayed how Henry stole the belt before using it to whip Sheamus over and over again. They cut to a live shot of Sheamus’s back covered with belt marks as JBL described this is as a good ol’ fashioned East Texas whipping. A final shot of Henry on-stage concluded the segment.
Tale of the Tape: Ryback vs. Kane still to come in the TV main event. Monster vs. Monster up next.
[Commercial Break]
Video package: Fandango. Next Monday, for the first time ever, Fandango battles Chris Jericho… in a dance-off. The announcer said that with the weight of hyping Rock vs. Cena at WrestleMania.
Earlier Tonight: Paul Heyman showed footage of Brock Lesnar and Heyman invading WWE HQ. The footage included Heyman’s barb about Stephanie McMahon, then Lesnar using Hunter’s sledgehammer to destroy Hunter’s office. There goes the lamp and plasma screen TV.
In-ring: WWE tag champion Kane was introduced to the ring for the main event. No Daniel Bryan accompanying Kane. Before Ryback was introduced, JBL said he thinks Steven Spielberg booked this match. Ryback then came out to a tepid reaction and WWE announced Chris Jericho hosting the Highlight Reel with Ryback as guest this Friday on Smackdown.
9 — WWE tag champion KANE vs. RYBACK
Ryback clotheslined Kane over the top rope to the floor, but Kane landed on his feet and dragged Ryback to the floor. They brawled on the outside leading to break.
[Commercial Break]
[Q13 — over-run] Raw returned at the top of the hour with Ryback covering Kane for a two count back in the ring. Ryback continued to work on Kane as Cole reset the show. Cole claimed it has been an eventful night on Raw, then recapped that the top angle of the show… occurred earlier in the day when Heyman and Lesnar invaded WWE HQ. Kane teased a comeback, but Ryback spinebustered him. JBL noted that John Cena is somewhere in the building watching this as Ryback teased Shell-Shock, but Kane countered with a suplex.
The two monsters battled to the top turnbuckle, where Ryback crotched Kane. Silence as Ryback tried to adjust Kane, then he woke up the crowd with a Shell-Shock tease. Ryback marched around the ring, then delivered it center-ring. Ryback covered for the win. JBL said Cena better be watching.
WINNER: Ryback at 8:43. Not a Raw main event to remember, which set up a post-match angle…
Post-match, Shield’s music played to bring out Shield through the crowd. Suddenly, Daniel Bryan hit the ring to check on Kane, so Ryback bailed from the ring and disappeared to ringside. Bryan stood tall over Kane as Shield surrounded the ring, then John Cena’s music played to bring out the WWE champion to stand next to Bryan. Kane disappeared as Shield surrounded the ring. Ryback then hit the ring with steel chair in-hand to send Shield packing.
But, Ryback waited for an opening to jab Cena in the gut with the chair before popping the chair over Cena’s back. Ryback then stood over Cena and shouted into the hard camera, “Ryback Rules!” Cena, flat down on the mat, continued to sell as Ryback stood over him while the crowd booed. The credits came on the screen and Raw signed off six minutes past the top of the hour.
FINAL THOUGHTS: Three hours is just too much, which leads to shows like this week where the important, PPV-selling content is weighed down by fluff and filler. Even then, WWE isn’t hitting high-points leading to Extreme Rules because there seems to be washes across the board. (1) Hunter blew off the Lesnar invasion angle vs. Hunter fired up the crowd to see him give Lesnar what’s coming to him. (2) Cena undressed Ryback vs. Ryback stood tall over Cena. (3) Ryback beat Kane vs. Ryback needs to do more than just beat Kane in a TV main event to be taken seriously as a true threat to Cena’s title.
NOW CHECK OUT THE PREVIOUS 5 YRS AGO FLASHBACK: 5 YRS AGO – WWE in Youngstown, Ohio (5-3-13): The Shield vs. Cena & Bryan & Kane, plus Bray, Ryback, Paige, Neville
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