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The following report originally published 20 years ago this week here at PWTorch.com.
WWE MONDAY NIGHT RAW REPORT
MAY 15, 2006
TEXAS TECH UNIVERSITY
REPORT BY WADE KELLER, EDITOR
-After the opening montage, Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler excitedly said they were kicking off the show with a huge match – Triple H vs. John Cena for the WWE Championship. Lillian Garcia introduced Triple H, who came out to his full ring intro. Ross said he has an opportunity to become an eleven time WWE Champion. When Lillian introduced John Cena, Vince McMahon walked instead to his own music. “Mr. McMahon could be wearing a mask, but you’d know who it was by that strut,” said Ross. Vince entered the ring, grabbed the house mic, and said he had great news. “I’m changing tonight’s main event,” he said. Hunter looked incredulously at Vince. Vince said the WWE Title will still be up for grabs, but so will too the Intercontinental Title. He said Rob Van Dam would join forces with Cena against Triple H and his two tag partners, Shelton Benjamin and Chris Masters. Hunter reacted with disgust. Vince said it’s the first-ever three-on-two handicapped Texas Tornado match. He said everybody in the ring all at the same time. He said whoever scores a pin first on a champion wins the title.
1 — JOHN CENA & ROB VAN DAM vs. TRIPLE H & SHELTON BENJAMIN & CHRIS MASTERS — WWE and IC Title match
Ross said this was history in the making, but it wasn’t what Hunter had prepared for. The five action began with Cena and Hunter brawling. The rest of the wrestlers charged to the ring. Masters powerslammed RVD in the ring and Hunter and Cena brawled at ringside. Hunter threw Cena into the ringside steps. When he tried again, Cena blocked it and rammed Hunter’s head into the ring apron. RVD head scissored Shelton over and out of the ring. RVD then flipped onto Masters, Hunter, and Cena at ringsidee. That sent them to a commercial.
[Commercial Break]
Cena took Hunter down in the ring with two shoulder tackles and a powerslam leading to a two count. Lawler said it would be a miracle if one of the titles didn’t change hands in the match. Yeah, something with a 40 percent chance of happening not happening is a miracle! Lawler mortgaged his credibility to overhype the match with that line.
At ringside, Shelton knocked Cena over the ringside barrier into the crowd with a jump spin wheel kick. Back in the ring, Hunter pounded away at RVD. Then Masters and Shelton stomped away at RVD. Shelton hit RVD with a running knee to the side of his face. When Shelton went for a cover on RVD, Hunter yanked him off. Hunter and Shelton jawed at each other. Masters then put RVD in the Masterlock. Hunter and Shelton realized it and they stopped arguing and both turned to hit Masters.
Hunter shoved both Masters and Shelton. RVD recovered during that time and surprised Hunter with some punches. RVD made a comeback against Shelton and Masters, too. RVD hit Hunter with a spin wheel kick, then hit Shelton with a Rolling Thunder, and then dropkicked Masters out of the ring. RVD bodyslammed Shelton and set up his Five-Star. Hunter shoved Hunter off the top rope. RVD crashed face-first into the security wall. Ross’s screamed, “My God!”
Cena returned to the ring finally and cleaned house on all three heels. Cena gave Shelton the Five-Knuckle Shuffle. Hunter, though, went for a Pedigree on Cena. Cena backdropped Hunter over the top rope. Cena and Shelton were the only two in the ring at this point. Cena applied the STFU. Shelton teased tapping, but Masters returned to the ring and hit Cena to force the break. RVD hit Shelton with the Five-Star. Hunter, though, caught RVD with a surprise Pedigree.
Cena gave Masters an FU. Rather than go for a pin on RVD, Hunter surprised Cena with a Pedigree. Hunter covered Cena, but at the same time, Shelton covered a KO’d RVD with his arm. The ref counted Shelton pinning RVD because Shelton made the cover a second before Hunter did. Hunter, though, thought he won until Lillian announced Shelton was the new IC Champion. Hunter argued with the ref, then gave the ref a Pedigree. Hunter stormed his way to the back.
WINNER: Shelton Benjamin at 13:00 to capture the IC Title.
STAR RATING: **3/4 — Good, non-stop action that all told a compelling, exciting, dramatic story. It was a clever, and satisfying way to avoid giving away the advertising Hunter-Cena singles match while not pulling a “bait and switch” that is likely to upset too many viewers (especially with an IC Title change in the mix.) This being first also could condition late-arrivers to tune in sooner, which could in the long-run lead to a higher first-quarter hour rating (which is usually the lowest of the show).
[Commercial Break]
-Todd Grisham attempted to interview Hunter backstage, but an angry Hunter shoved the mic away from his face and stormed off.
-Ross and Lawler plugged Mick Foley’s interview and the Shawn Michaels vs. Kenny match.
-Trish Stratus walked out to address Mickey James. She demanded she walk to the ring so they could settle their issues “right here, right now.” Mickey came to the ring. Trish matrixed out of the path of Mickey and then the mystery blond woman attacked her. Trish said Beth is her new friend. “Apparently Mickey, I’m not the only one you screwed over,” she said. Beth then said, “Mickey, I’m not going to let you get away with what you did to me, you psycho.” Mickey began screaming and hyperventilating.
-They showed a clip of the world premier of Kane’s “See No Evil” movie. They showed fans chanting “See No Evil” outside the theater. Soundbites aired with Hunter, Foley, Cena, Kurt Angle, JBL, Rey Mysterio, Kane. Kane said the movie is so rewarding because he can act out his fantasies. They showed the crowd with a night vision camera cringing and screaming. This movie actually has a chance to surprise the industry with the first weekend gross because they’re hyping it well.
[Commercial Break]
-In the “WWE 24/7 – This Week in History” segment, they went back to Bruno Sammartino beating Buddy Rogers on May 17, 1963 in New York City in 48 seconds to win the World Wide Wrestling Federation Championship. The voiceover said Bruno set attendance records in defenses against Stan “The Man” Stasiak, Gorilla Monsoon, “Classy” Freddie Blassie, Killer Kowalski, Dr. Jerry Graham, “and many more.” It touted his seven-and-a-half year title reign as “unprecedented” and “longer than any other champion in the history of the squared circle.” That’s the most TV time Sammartino has ever received, and now that there’s a chance to earn revenue off of it’s history with “24/7,” they are going to be introducing a whole new generation to their past.
-Backstage, Hunter was still upset. Shane McMahon walked in and said he’s obviously not in the mood for small talk. When Hunter protested Shane’s assertion that Vince did him a favor, Shane said the title was on the line after all. Shane said he, Shane, was going to be the special guest referee for the Michaels-Kenny main event. Shane said Vince expects him to be in Kenny’s corner to “ensure Michaels is taken care of” because the rest of Spirit Squad were banned from ringside. That prompts the question, who banned Spirit Squad from ringside in the first place, and why didn’t Vince just overrule that decision if he were concerned with things not going Kenny’s way? Hunter didn’t look pleased with the assignment.
-Spirit Squad came to the ring and did a cheer about Goldust & Snitsky, their opponents in the next match. Ross said regarding Spirit Squad, “It’s like having a boil that just won’t go away.”
[Commercial Break]
2 — JOHNNY & NICKY (w/Mikey, Mitch) vs. GOLDUST & GENE SNITSKY — World Tag Team Championship match
Goldust dominated early until Mikey and Mitch tripped him from ringside. Then Spirit Squad attacked Goldust at ringside, ramming him back-first into the ring apron. When Goldust went for a tag, Snitsky wasn’t there because he was chasing down Mikey at ringside. Johnny held Goldust on the mat with a headlock for a minute. Goldust surprised Nicky with a backslide and a snap powerslam, but despite having energy for those moves, he didn’t have the energy to crawl over and make a tag to Snitsky. When he got near, Nicky yanked him away. Goldust, though, persevered and made the tag finally at 6:00. Snitsky tried to work over Spirit Squad, but they outnumbered him. Snitsky, though, took then down with a double clothesline and then showed Greg Gagne style fire. He gave Nikey a sideslam for a near fall. As Johnny distracted the ref, Mikey leaped off the trampoline and bulldogged Snitsky from behind, leading to the pin.
WINNERS: Spirit Squad in 7:00.
STAR RATING: * — Okay match, actually. Spirit Squad’s energy and athleticism is great, and Goldust & Snitsky played their roles just fine.
-They showed Mick Foley backstage approaching the ring to talk.
-A commercial announced a three-disk set for the WrestleMania DVD coming out next week which includes not only WrestleMania, but also the complete Hall of Fame induction ceremony and Saturday’s Night Main Event hyping WM.
[Commercial Break]
ARTICLE CONTINUED BELOW…
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-Mick Foley walked out at the end of the first hour and said he wanted to answer the question everybody’s been talking about – what he and Melina were doing hanging out together at the “See No Evil” premiere. Then he smiled and said he’d actually talk about why he did what he did to Tommy Dreamer last week. He said it is “unbelievable” in the literal sense of the word. He was it was unbelievable because he has been friends with him for over tens years. He said he also held his arm high with Edge and kissed Lita’s hand. He said he could offer excuses, such as saying he had too many shots to the head. But instead, he wanted to apologize.
He said he had two words for the big state of Texas, “I’m sorry.” He said he wanted to say it to Tommy’s face, but he was ailing due to complications from a barbed wire baseball bat hitting his genitalia. He said instead he wanted to address in person a man who left a series of messages on his answering machine contending he was a better man than he showed on Monday night – Terry Funk. Funk got a nice reception from the fans. He showed his age as he walked to the ring a bit like Vince McMahon, but more gingerly. They went to a clip of Funk wrestling Road Dogg & Billy Gunn on March 29, 1998 at WrestleMania in a hardcore match. Ross said Funk has been a profound influence on his career.
Foley said it was great to see Funk. Funk said, “Not so fast, Cactus.” He said he knows the reason he humiliated Tommy Dreamer. “You humiliated him, and I want to know why. Why did you humiliate him? Tell me.” Funk screwed up that first line and it led to an awkward few seconds with Foley. Foley said his reason was because he and Edge made history by having the greatest hardcore match in history. “I’ll be damned if a few weeks after making history, I’m gonna stand by and let some second rate ECW scumbags come into our house, play in our ring, and portray themselves as if they are what hardcore is all about. It’s not going to happen. So maybe Edge and I created a pact to defend what we created.”
Funk tried to interrupt, but Foley continued. He said there are three things he’ll defend with his life: the honor of his wife, the honor of his kids, and his legacy as the “honor of my legacy as the hardcore wrestling professional legend.” Funk said Foley doesn’t get it because “you are ECW.” He said ECW is family, and family is ECW. He said he is family, and he told Mick he has been through so much with him. He talked about how they beat the hell out of each other with barbed wire and fires, but he always put his arm around him and said he is a hell of a tough guy. He said he is like a son to him. Foley feigned being emotionally moved. The crowd was largely skeptical, but there were a few cheers. Foley hugged Funk, but then said he wanted to tell him something, referring to him as “Dad.”
Foley said it’s been so long since they were together, but it wasn’t supposed to be that way. He said in 2003, Funk was supposed to be there for a big ceremony for him. Then it got really good. Foley said at MSG in one of the greatest nights of his life, he was honored in a hardcore ceremony. He said Steve Austin handed him the Hardcore Title belt. He was surrounded by people he fought against and with. He said he wondered why Funk wasn’t there. “I was told was, ‘We’re sorry, Mick, but Terry Funk wanted too much money to be there.’ How do you think that made me feel? It broke my heart!” Foley continued, “Now you have the nerve to stand here and look me in the eye and say I’m like a son to you?” Funk told him to listen to him. “This is my WWE ring, these are my WWE fans,” he said to a mixed reaction.
Foley said in a year, or maybe two or three or four, it’s inevitable, he’ll get a call saying the Funker is gone. He’ll get invited to speak at his funeral, but “I’ll say I’d like to, but it’s going to cost you an awful lot of money to bring me out to a dumb like West Texas.” That turned the crowd against Foley. Foley said in reality it won’t cost a dime and he’ll come for free because he wants to crawl over and spit on his grave, “you greedy, miserable, selfish son of a bitch!” Funk responded, “You got your nerve, Foley. I’m gonna John Wayne your ass. I’m gonna beat the hell out of you, Foley.”
Foley told him to take his best shot. Funk slapped Foley four times and asked him to take a shot back at him. The crowd chanted for Terry as he slapped Foley four more times. Funk then said, as Foley had his back turned to him, “If I had a head like yours, I’d have it circumsized.” Then he added, “Hey Foley, your wife’s a whore.” Ross said that might be too heavy. Funk said, “Hey Foley, your kids are bastards.” Ross said Foley’s face was turning pale.
Funk concluded, “Hey Foley! The WWE sucks.” Foley then turned and punched Funk. Funk leaned on the top rope as Foley hit Funk with a barrage of punches. Ross said he couldn’t believe his eyes. Funk threw some punches back at Foley. Edge then slid into the ring with a barbed wire baseball bat. Funk punched Edge into the corner, then celebrated in mid-ring. Lita then hit Funk from behind with a low blow. Edge then grabbed the barbed wire baseball bat and attacked Funk with it. Funk screamed, “You son of a bitch. Damn you, Foley.” Foley then applied the Mandible Claw. Edge then speared Funk right out of the Mandible Claw.
Good, memorable segment. There’s a lot to talk about regarding that angle, and I’ll give my in-depth thoughts in my weekly post-Raw VIP Audio Update after the show.
[Commercial Break]
3 — MATT STRIKER vs. EUGENE
Striker did some mic work insulting the fans before the match and saying he’d teach Eugene a lesson. Eugene came to the ring in an oversized bright red foam cowboy hat. Striker attaked Eugene at ringside. At 3:00 Eugene made a comeback. They compared it to Hulk Hogan’s resilience. Eugene went for a Stunner, but Striker avoided it. Eugene fired back with a big boot and a legdrop for the very near fall. Striker gave Eugene an inverted neckbreaker followed by a finisher where he yanked Eugene’s back onto his ankle as he dropped down. Ross said he didn’t know what he calls that.
WINNER: Striker in 4:00.
STAR RATING: 3/4*
-Ross said he has learned many lessons from Kane, and then went to a video feature on Kane’s career, dating back to his early years with the mask. The clips included him setting Jim Ross on fire. Then it went into the May 19 storyline.
[Commercial Break]
-They showed a clip from the opening match.
-Maria interviewed Carlito backstage. She asked why he beat up Eugene last week. “Don’t you like him?” she squaked. Carlito said he liked him until he involved in his match. He said, “One thing everyone around here needs to learn is that messing with Carlito is not cool.” Good effort at being sure Carlito doesn’t lose his edge. Maria then said she likes his t-shirt. She asked what it means when it says, “Do you spit or swallow? I’ve only seen you take a bite of an apple and swallow.” Maria said, “When I eat ann apple? Duh! I swallow.”
-Backstage, Vince McMahon was about to smooch Candice. Hunter barged into the room. He said even though it wasn’t the type of match he expected, he still got the title match he promised him. He said he owes him. He presented Hunter with a sledgehammer and told Hunter to bash Michaels with it. “Then there will be a new era dawning here in the WWE,” he said. “Go get him, champ.”
[Commercial Break]
4 — UMAGA (w/Armado Alejandra Estrada) vs. CHRIS WELLMAN
Armando introduced his Samoan bulldozer, Umaga. Ross said Umaga is untouched so far, and even destroyed the legendary Ric Flair. Umaga swung Wellman out of the ring. Then he stood him on the stairs and yanked him over his head by the neck and flipped him onto the mat at ringside. Ross said that was like being tossed out of a car in a wreck. Umaga hung Wellman upside down and charged him in the corner. Ross said he didn’t know if anyone could stop him. Umaga then gave him a Samoan Spike to the mat for the win. Ross said he was somewhere between 350 and 400 pounds with the agility of a much smaller man. “Can anybody stop Umaga in the entire WWE?”
WINNER: Umaga in 2:00.
STAR RATING: 1/4* — Just a squash, but Umaga looked strong as usual.
-The Smackdown Rebound aired, including Rey attacked JBL at the announcers’ desk. Then it showed The Great Khali easily tossing Rey out of the ring twice, then brushing off an attempted head scissors offf hte top rope and ending with his finishing toss to the mat and a boot over Rey’s throat for the win. They showed Rey’s family and hometown crowd looking on in shock.
-Backstage, Spirit Squad got peppy with Shane McMahon. They gave Shane a little cheer. Shane smiled broadly.
[Commercial Break]
-Clips aired again from the premiere of “See No Evil” after Raw last week in Anaheim, Calif.
-The ring introduction took place for Shane McMahon first. Ross said this was looking like it would be Shawn Michaels’s execution. Then Kenny’s intro. Then Hunter’s intro.
[Commercial Break]
5 — KENNY vs. SHAWN MICHAELS with Shane McMahon as special referee.
Shawn Michaels’s full ring intro them took place after the break. Hunter was shown sitting at ringside with the sledgehammer. Michaels went right after Kenny. Kenny ran. Shane got in Shawn’s face, so Shawn chased him out of and back into the ring. Michaels chopped Kenny in the corner. Ross said he is sure Michaels could beat Kenny in an even playing field, but that is not the case tonight. A minute later, Kenny reversed Michaels into the corner and Michaels did the Flair flip over the corner and to the floor. Hunter slowly approached Michaels. Kenny got to Michaels before Hunter did. Mihcaels climbed to the top rope, but Shane shoved him off. The crowd booed. Shane called for Kenny to go after Michaels. He made a super-fast two count. Shane took off his belt and dropped it, leaving it for Kenny to use as a weapon against Michaels. Kenny got another super-fast two count.
Kenny choked Michaels with the belt at 4:00. Michaels fought out of it and hit Kenny with a flying clothesline. He gave Kenny an inverted atomic drop, punched Kenny a few times, and then grabbed the belt. He whipped Shane with it, sending Shane running to the back. Michaels hit the top rope elbowdrop. He played to the crowd and stomped the mat to signal for Sweet Chin Music. he KO’d Kenny with the kick. Shane returned to the ring and tackled Michaels to the mat, punching him several times, and then kneeing him in the gut. He finished offf Michaels with several inverted backbreakers. Shane signalled for Hunter to enter the ring with the sledgehammer at 7:00. Ross said he was going to turn his head.
Hunter entered the ring, looked around, and as Shane continued to hold Michaels, grabbed Michaels and said, “Look at me. I want you to see this coming.” He held the sledgehammer and then rammed it toward Michaels. Michaels ducked and the sledgehammer rammed Shane in the face. hunter looked down at Shane as the crowd cheered. Ross said, “That is not what The Game had intended.” Vince McMahon came to the ring and called for help. In a scene out of a mafia movie, he leaned over his fallen sign and called for someone to do something. His language was bleeped out at one point. Vince hugged Shane and cried in an over-the-top scene that was pretty funny. Hunter backed up toward the stage and said, “I’m sorry, Vince. It was an acccident. Michaels moved. It was an accident.” Vince looked toward Hunter and said, “Son of a bitch.”
WINNER: No decision.
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