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KELLER’S AEW DYNAMITE REPORT
APRIL 6, 2022
BOSTON, MASS. AT THE AGGANIS ARENA
AIRED LIVE ON TBS
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tony Schiavone, Excalibur
Ring Announcer: Justin Roberts
[HOUR ONE]
-Jim Ross introduced the show as Adam Cole’s ring entrance took place. Tony Schiavone and Excalibur talked about this being a pay-per-view caliber line-up.
(1) ADAM COLE vs. CHRISTIAN CAGE
Ross touted that he’s never looked forward to a tag team match up on free television like he is tonight’s FTR vs. Young Bucks match. Schiavone talked about the ROH PPV match with FTR and the Briscoes and how fans have been clamoring for a Bucks-FTR rematch for 18 months. They worked at a methodical pace in the early minutes. A few minutes in, Christian took over at ringside and chopped away at Cole’s chest before throwing him back into the ring. Cole took over and whipped Christian into the ringside barricade a minute later. Ross noted that Cole earned his first paycheck in pro wrestling “14 years ago today.” They cut to a split-screen break at 6:00. [c/ss]
Back from the break, Christian had taken over and leaped off the top rope onto Cole at ringside. A few minutes later, after more back and forth action, Cole superkicked Christian and then hit the Boom for a near fall. The announcers really underplayed that sequence. A dueling chant of “Adam Cole! / Let’s Go Christian!” broke out. Christian went for a second rope neckbreaker, but Cole caught him mid-air with a kick for a two count. Ross said he didn’t make a strong cover and it cost him. Cole set up a Panama Sunrise, but Christian countered with a top rope huracanrana for a near fall. After another sequence and near falls, fans stood and applauded and then chanted “AEW! AEW!” Cole poked Christian’s eyes and then landed The Boom to the back of Christian’s head for the win.
WINNER: Cole in 15:00.
(Keller’s Analysis: Very much a Christian-style match. It was disciplined and crisp, building slowly and hitting a meaningful crescendo that the crowd was into big time. Cole played his role as he was able to elevate what might have been a slightly “too methodical” pace to earn that crowd reaction late in the match. Christian hasn’t been “outworking everyone” lately in terms of how often he’s been putting in good matches like this on national TV, so this was good to see.)
-Afterward, Kyle O’Reilly and Bobby Fish attacked Christian. Jungle Boy and Luchasaurus made a quick save. “Hangman” Page then came out. Cole yapped into the mic as Hangman came out, telling him to stop because he’s not fighting him until he puts the AEW Title on the line. Hangman entered and circled Cole and then got in his face and asked if he wants another match with him. He shoved him and then said he’ll give him title match “and let it serve as your punishment.” He said next week they have a live Rampage in Texas. He said it won’t be a normal match and it won’t be on his terms. He said he’ll defend against him in a Texas Death Match. Cole soaked up the ramifications and seemed nervous. Hangman told him to take the next week to get his affairs in order. Hangman’s music played as Cole left the ring. Excalibur plugged that the match takes place in nine days.
(Keller’s Analysis: That’s a big match for Rampage and should help bring some viewers back to the show who haven’t made it a priority. C.M. Punk mistakenly gave away this match was happening last week during his promo when he mentioned he has to wait to two weeks to find out who will be champion when he aims to win the title. I liked Hangman’s intensity here. I would prefer a straight up wrestling match, not a Texas Death Match, though. It was going to be a challenge to create a scenario where Cole got a title rematch before other contenders despite losing his other title shot clean, but Cole pestering Hangman for weeks and Hangman snapping and granting him a shot to shut him up is about the best of all imperfect options if they were determined to book that match.)
-Highlights aired of last week’s ROH Supercard of Honor with Jonathan Gresham celebrating his win, then Jay Lethal challenging him and turning heel. Sonjay Dutt joined Lethal in attacking Gresham. Then Samoa Joe made his return to ROH, stepping out onto the stage and then going face-to-face with Lethal and putting Dutt to sleep right in front of Lethal.
(2) SAMOA JOE vs. “PLATINUM” MAX CASTER (w/Anthony Bowens) – Owen Hart Foundation Tournament opening round match
Samoa Joe made his ring entrance first. He marched out with the signature white towel around his neck and baggy shorts. He got a nice reception. Max Caster and Anthony Bowens came out next. Caster rapped, of course. He said, “I’m main event Max, you’re X Division … So I’m sending you home, you’re just injury prone” … He said he has that towel because he “can’t stop playing with himself.” Bowens acted grossed out and threw a white towel he brought with him into the crowd. He added, “When we beat them in the ratings, he was their champ.” They cut to reactions of Joe all along, which was fun. Bowens then yelled, “The Acclaimed have arrived!”
Joe stared at Caster as the bell rang. Fans sang, “Joe is gonna kill you!” Caster poked Joe in the chest and trash-talked him. Joe headbutted Caster and punched away at him. He knocked Caster down in the corner with a barrage of punches. Joe hit his high dropdown roundkick. Caster rolled to ringside to regroup at 2:00. Joe dove through the ropes and landed a flying elbow to Caster’s head. The crowd chanted “Joe! Joe!” Joe walked toward Bowens at ringside, giving Caster an opening to attack him from behind.
Back in the ring, Caster chopped Joe in the neck. Joe no-sold it and then took Caster down with a hard elbow. Joe then gave Caster the Muscle Buster.
WINNER: Joe in 4:00.
(Keller’s Analysis: Caster is so entertaining as a heel and he’s great in this role. Joe looked like vintage Joe there – badass and athletic. Good to see he still has that in him!)
-Sonjay Dutt and Jay Lethal interrupted on the big screen. Lethal said they respected Joe more than he respected them. Jay said he’s changed his outlook on life. He said Joe never answered his phone when he called him for four months. He said he was looking for advice from his one-time mentor, but he wouldn’t pick up the phone for anyone but a billionaire. He said his first t-shirt should say “Samoa Joe, the Samoan Gold Digger.” He said what most upsets him is that he didn’t know Joe was going to be there. He said he would have rolled out the red carpet for him. Dutt said it’s not too late. Lethal said he’s right, so next week he’s going to give Joe a present he’ll never forget. “See you in New Orleans,” said Dutt.
(Keller’s Analysis: Nice heel promo from Lethal, and I like the dynamic between Lethal and Dutt. It’s good to see Dutt get TV time here.)
-The announcers hyped upcoming matches on the show. [c]
-Schiavone interviewed William Regal, Bryan Danielson, and Jon Moxley backstage. He plugged Wheeler Yuta vs. Moxley and Trent Beretta against Danielson on Rampage on Friday. Regal said he feels sorry for Beretta. He said Yuta has impressed him and Bryan greatly, but now he has to impress Moxley. Moxley said the forecast for Friday is the sound of bones cracking like thunder and raining blood.
(3) “CHAIRMAN” SHAWN SPEARS vs. “CAPTAIN” SHAWN DEAN
Shawn Spears sat on the stage under red and green lights with a hood. He then stood and made his way to the ring with a chair in hand. Ross called it “a big presentation for the chair man.” Excalibur wondered if Spears’ association with MJF is holding him back. MJF then made his entrance onto the stage. He spit his gum out at the camera and then joined the announcers at the commentary table. There were posted hanging on the ringside barricades alerting security that Wardlow was banned from the arena. Fans chanted “Wardlow! Wardlow!” Dean scored with some early chops to the chest. Spears took over quickly with a neckbreaker across his knee. He lifted Dean’s shoulders at two. “Play with your food, Spears!” MJF said. “Play with your food.”
Spears lifted Dean onto his shoulders, but then saw on the big screen that security staff were lying on the floor. Excalibur said he’s hearing in his earpiece what happened. Wardlow then showed up and tossed around security, including ramming them into some lockers. He was fuming mad and intense. He got a huge pop as he made his way into the arena. MJF yelled, “Somebody do your goddam job!” He fended off more security guys. Finally three officers grabbed him. Meanwhile, Dean rolled up a DISTRACTED Spears for an upset three count. Excalibur said Dean has a win over Spears and MJF now. MJF marched angrily to the ring as Wardlow was escorted out of the arena while smiling and blowing kisses at MJF.
WINNER: Dean in 5:00.
-Schivaone was going to interview Wheeler backstage when chuck Taylor, Orange Cassidy, and Trent approached him. Chuck said he understands that he wants to be the best wrestler he can be, but he can do that with them. He said they love him and they helped train him and he used to live on their couch. “I bought you those tights, man,” Chuck said. Trent said, “I don’t love him. I think he’s a scumbag and a traitor.” He told him to watch what he does against Danielson. “Learn from the guys you’re turning your back on,” Trent said. Trent then shoved Wheeler. Chuck stepped between them. Wheeler told him not to touch him. [c/ss]
-Sammy Guevara came out next. He had white signs that he held up during the split-screen break. Tay Conti joined him. He held up a picture of poop with the words, “Hey Plop Team. You’ve got more excuses than wins, members, or fans! How about we change your name? How does American ‘Talk Team’ Sound? That’s all you guys seem to do! Or… American ‘Walk Team.’ After last week, I’m sure you’re doing a lot of that! By the way… I think we owe you some money.” Conti took cash out of her pocket and threw it into the air. “I think we owe you something else, too. Each and everyone one of you! While I have the record for another title shot, I want nothing more than sweet revenge. Sorry. We want nothing more than sweet revenge. And we won’t stop until we get it. Until then… we will keep breaking your crap.” Then they kissed.
(Keller’s Analysis: Madcap Moss would reject that material. They can’t seriously think they’re a babyface act at this point, can they? They’re way too pleased with themselves. And the jokes are lame.)
-They showed a clip of Eddie Kingston throwing a backstage flat screen TV at Chris Jericho as he and the rest of the Jericho Appreciation Society ran out the exit and fled in an SUV.
-They went to the announcers on camera who reflected on the Kingston-Jericho feud. They were interrupted by Kingston, Santana, and Ortiz marching to the ring. Fans chanted “Eddie! Eddie!” He said he’ll go after Jericho even if he’s with his wife and kids. He said he knows where Danny Garcia lives. Santana and Ortiz challenged them to a six-man tag match next week. Excalibur wondered if the JAS will accept the offer. Ross said they’ll face them whether they like it or not.
-A video aired on Hook vs. Q.T. Marshall.
-The announcers hyped upcoming matches. [c]
-Schiavone introduced Jade Cargill, who walked onto the stage with “Smart” Mark Sterling. Schiavone asked about her chance to win the 30th match in 30 tries soon. She said she is there to formally to introduce her Baddies Section. They showed a half dozen women in the crowd all dressed up preening for the camera in the crowd. She called the fans slobs. Sterling said it was difficult too find good looking women in the crowd, but Jade didn’t give up. Sterling then said Marina Shafir might be a bad ass, but she’s no Baddie. Jade said she’s tired of MMA rejects coming onto her show. Sterling said he was concerned given her resume and that she called herself “The Problem.” Jade said she’s the “problem solver.”
-Alex Marvez interviewed Spears and MJF backstage. Spears said Wardlow is “pissing up the wrong tree.” MJF prayed that Wardlow shows his face next week because there will be twice as many security guys. MJF then challenged Dean to a match next week. He mocked his saluting gestures and said he’ll earn him a purple heart after he injures him next week.
-Butcher & Blade made their ring entrance. [c/ss]
(4) THE HARDY BROTHERS vs. THE BUTCHER & THE BLADE – Elimination Tables match
Lots of spots with tables early.
[HOUR TWO]
The Hardys put Butcher on a table mid-ring. Jeff climbed to the top, but Blade knocked him off balance. Blade took forever to knock him off balance and Hardy had to pretend he had never climbed to the top rope before while waiting for Blade to inexplicably move toward him and knock him off balance. Butcher & Blade took over. They power suplexed Jeff through a table. [c/ss]
They brawled around ringside after the break. Jeff climbed a tall ladder and leaped on Blade below with a Swanton, smashing him through two tables to win.
WINNERS: The Hardys in 12:00.
(Keller’s Analysis: This is an example of needless tables match just to get cheap crowd pops. AEW should have more confidence in their wrestlers than overdoing it with these garbage stunt matches that turn into jumbled messes, which is what this was.)
-As the Hardys were celebrating, Andrade, The Bunny, Alex the Assistant, and Private Party walked onto the stage. Sting’s music played and he came up behind them on the ramp and bashed Private Party with his bat. He threatened Andrade. Andrade positioned Bunny in between them. Excalibur called it classless for Andrade to do that.
-Backstage, Christian, Jungle Boy, and Luchasaurus were standing by. Christian looked frustrated and threw a water bottle and stormed off. JB made fun of O’Reilly and Fish, including mocking their “dumbass cauliflower ears.” (That’s not cool. Those are earned on the mat. That’s a tone deaf criticism for a babyface to make.) JB then said they’re tired of them sticking their noses in their business week after week, so he said they’ll put their tag titles on the line against them next week.
(Keller’s Analysis: Hangman gifting Cole an unearned title match next week pushing it, but this makes a mockery out of the earned rankings doing it twice on one show.) [c]
-A vignette aired with soundbites from Nyla Rose & Vickie Guerrero and Thunder Rosa talking about their feud. Rosa said she can come and try to take her title. That will take place Apr. 16 on “Battle of the Belts: Saturday Fight Night.”
-Schiavone stood by with Jamie Hayter and Toni Storm backstage. He thanked them for agreeing to no physicality. He said they might end up facing each other later in the tournament. Hayter slapped Toni’s hand aside and said her star power and momentum stops with her. She said she deserves to win it. Toni called her “sweetheart” and said, “This has only just begun.”
(5) JULIA HART (w/Brian Pillman Jr. & Griff Garrison) vs. HIKARU SHIDA – Owen Hart Foundation Women’s Tournament match
Hart attacked Shida before the bell. The ref, inexplicably, decided to reward Hart’s behavior and call for the bell with Shida down on the mat. Schiavone said he’s not taking sides, but it’s a hell of a move (What??!) Hart told Garrison and Pillman to leave ringside. Schiavone said he’s never seen someone send their seconds or help to the back for no apparent reason. Shida eventually finished Hart with her Falcon Arrow for the three count.
WINNER: Shida in 8:00.
-Afterward, Serena Deeb came out with a kendo stick. Shida saw her coming and they had a staredown.
-Marvez interviewed Swerve Strickland about being at the Grammy’s on Sunday They showed photos of him on the red carpet. He talked about what happened to him and Keith Lee on Rampage. He said he hasn’t forgotten about it. He said he has things to do and left. Ricky Starks and Powerhouse Hobbs then jumped him as he entered the locker room. Keith Lee got involved. Lee shoved Hobbs through a wall they put up just for that spot.
-The announcers hyped upcoming line-ups.
(6) FTR (Dax Harwood & Cash Wheeler) vs. THE YOUNG BUCKS (Matt & Nick Jackson w/Brandon Cutler) – ROH Tag Team Title match
ROH ring announcer Bobby Cruise did formal ring introductions. The bell rang 39 minutes into the hour. After some back and forth early, FTR got in sustained offense. Then the Bucks took over. They cut to a split-screen break after Nick showboated. [c/ss]
Dax eventually got a hot-tag. He scored a near fall on Matt after a sudden piledriver. The crowd counted a long. Fans chanted “This is awesome!” Matt climbed to the top, but Dax knocked him off balance. Cash climbed to the top rope as Dax superplexed Matt. Nick knocked Cash off the top rope, though, with a hurancanrana before he could leap onto Matt. Cutler applied cold spray. Nick tagged in and attacked Cash. Cash and Dax went for the Big Rig, but Matt blocked it. Nick distracted the ref as Matt kicked Cash between his legs. The Bucks then gave Cash the Big Rig for a believable near fall. The crowd popped for the kickout.
The Bucks landed More Bang for Your Buck for another near fall on Cash. Ross touted the determination and fight in FTR. FTR countered more Bucks cheating. The Bucks landed stereo superkicks on Dax, then went over to Cash and lifted him by his arms. They landed the BTE Trigger, but Cash put his leg on the bottom rope. The ref hit the mat three times and the Bucks celebrated, but the ref rescinded the pin and informed the Bucks. They were upset, but regrouped quickly. Fans chanted “FTR! FTR!” The Bucks set up the Meltzer Driver, but Dax intervened and FTR landed a slingshot/tombstone combo. They held Matt by his arms to set up a BTE Trigger. Matt spit at them before they hit it. FTR then kissed him on the cheeks. Then they hit the Big Rig for the win. Ross said FTR continue to dominate tag team wrestling.
WINNERS: FTR in 19:00 to retain the ROH Tag Team Titles.
(Keller’s Analysis: Excellent tag match. Matt’s facial expression was too cartoonish after he ate the BTE Trigger and then had to play dead seconds later, but other than that, this was state of the art tag wrestling. FTR are on a roll right now and the crowd was eating them up as a babyface team.)
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