SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
The following report originally published 30 years ago this week in the Pro Wrestling Torch Newsletter paper copy…
KELLER’S WWE MONDAY NIGHT RAW REPORT
MAY 6, 1996
ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN THE PRO WRESTLING TORCH NEWSLETTER (ISSUE #387)
(Taped Apr. 29 in Souix City, Ia.)… The show opened with scenes of Ray “The Crippler” Stevens. McMahon sent condolences to his family and friends… A woman with background lighting only with a caption reading, “Wife of a former pro wrestler” began talking. She said McMahon is a homewrecker… Jerry Lawler and Vince McMahon opened the show…
(1) Marc Mero (w/Sable) pinned 1-2-3 Kid. Hunter Hearst Helmsley did color commentary at ringside. Lawler said Sable told him that after Hunter blew into her ear once, she told Hunter, “Thanks for the refill.” Kid applied a sleeper three times during the match. Fans chanted “Wildman” during the second sleeper. Kid used the ropes for leverage. Hunter was very good on commentary staying in dignified character. Hunter knocked Mero off the top rope, but when Kid went for a suplex, Mero landed on Kid for the pin… They recapped the Steve Austin-Savio Vega feud…
(2) British Bulldog pinned Fatu. Throughout the match the two Samoans watched Fatu from ringside. Who’s letting them in the building anyway? When McMahon questioned why Diana was at ringside, Lawler joked that the only place Diana can feel safe is at ringside. Late in the match with Fatu on offense, Cornette got on the ring apron. Bulldog went to hit Fatu from behind, but Fatu moved and Bulldog hit Cornette. Bulldog though quickly took over with a hard clothesline for a two count. A powerslam later Bulldog scored the pin. Strangely on every two count McMahon shouted, “One, two, three, he got him!” and on the pinfall that ended the match McMahon shouted, “One, two, he kicked out! No he didn’t!” Geez! The two Samoans confronted Fatu afterward. Fatu said, “You say you’re my family. You’re not my family, the WWF is (and he looked at the crowd)”…
They plugged next week’s Raw headlined with a non-title Shawn Michaels vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley match and Duke Droese vs. Vader…
ARTICLE CONTINUED BELOW…
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(3) The Body Donnas beat Tekno Team 2000. What is supposed to be the gimmick of Tekno Team? It’s never been established. They showed the Rockers backstage watching the match on a monitor. Leif Cassidy is doing a good job in his new geek role, but it doesn’t seem like much thought has been put into Marty Jannetty’s role. Is he a geek all of a sudden? Was he always a geek? Or isn’t he a geek and is he ashamed of being with Leif? So far Jannetty has been annoyingly ambiguous.
Jim Ross interviewed Jim Cornette and Vader backstage. Vader was calmly looking at the floor until the camera came on at which point he began growling at the camera. They promo’d their bouts versus Yokozuna at IYH and Duke Droese next week…
(4) Undertaker beat Owen Hart. Goldust joined McMahon and Lawler at ringside. Goldust brushed up close to McMahon and McMahon brushed him away nervously. McMahon told Goldust that his match at IYH will be a casket match. Goldust acted scared of the stipulation. and tried to return to the locker room, but then Undertaker’s music began. Goldust and Marlena then returned to the broadcast position. Goldust began fantasizing about what he could do with and to Undertaker.
McMahon asked Goldust how bizarre he is and Goldust responded, “You have no idea how bizarre I really am.” He then said, “Oh, what I would do with that… urn.” After a commercial break, Goldust approached Paul Bearer. It’s a a classic picture seeing them face to face. Goldust came on to Bearer. Bearer bent backward and grimaced, trying to get away. Lawler said, “Look, he’s like Mikey, he likes it.” When Goldust began loosening Bearer’s tie, Lawler said, “Watch out or more chin will fall out of there.” Bearer fled to the back. Owen hit a top rope dropkick. He then went for the sharpshooter, but Undertaker grabbed his throat and chokeslammed him. Moments later he hit the tombstone for the win. Bearer then rolled a gold casket to ringside…
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