Roman Reigns is one of the most divisive and talked about WWE performers in history. The company makes desperate play after desperate play to make him their number one star – thus far to no avail. How do they do it? What do they do?
I’m Tom Colohue and this is the Monday Night Reigns-o-meter.
Monday Night Reigns-o-meter
Poor Roman. Another pay per view has passed him by and his old buddies Ambrose, Styles and Wyatt all got rave reviews. And that’s a shame. Wyatt was supposed to be Roman’s eternal rival. Roman grew that beard especially for you, Bray! How could you?
And so, with only one televised show this week, what does Roman do? He’s not the favoured Joe of Samoan heritage any more. He’s not the company favourite. Will he even be able to walk down that ramp as the first wrestler, fire off his usual promo and go up against the odds like nobody else?
Why, yes, of course he will.
Stephanie hams up the heel heat by going after Foley, then we have the luscious sex machine Roman Reigns walking down to the ring to cut a standard tough guy promo.
Roman wants Strowman. Stephanie throws the question out to a crowd that responds in an overwhelming positive. She then tells Roman that nobody cares about him, she says they want to see him hurt. She says only a McMahon cares about him. All of this is true, but because Stephanie just ignored them, the fans boo the truth.
Stephanie tries to push a Mark Henry match. That doesn’t work. Stephanie puts herself over because she’s the boss and all, so Roman tries to intimidate her with his glistening muscles.
And then come The Club, dropping the guy bomb, a lot. They’re really namedropping Braun Strowman a lot. A wild match appears. Apparently none of these 3 had a match booked beforehand. Why did they travel all the way here then?
Roman, naturally, goes looking for a fight. Another handicap match, eh? Can’t make him look strong one on one, WWE?
The finish is, for lack of a better word, ridiculous. Roman wins by DQ, then escapes the magic killer and makes the entire tag division look useless. Is it so hard to use a team that aren’t champions to do this? Roman does that thing where he looks buff, but doesn’t do any magic tricks with his chair this time.
And then comes what will forever be recognised as The Great Drought. Roman Reigns disappears from our screen for a long time. No 15 minute reminders. No 2 minute warning. By the end of it, all the fans are chanting “Where’s Roman?” apart from the few who got into the building.
Pretty sure Jack Gallagher is more over than Roman Reigns at this point. Just saying.
Before the Strowman match we get a video package that features Roman getting the crap kicked out of him by Joe and Braun. We’re supposed to feel sorry for him, so naturally I’m still crying 12 hours later. If Roman doesn’t beat Strowman I am of course going to riot, though that will just be for a while. UV title goes Owens-Berg-Brock-Reigns after all.
The match is so intensely slow and dull that by the end of it, all of the fans are desperate for Roman. They don’t voice this, choosing instead to be mildly interested in the match and supportive of Mark Henry, but they feel sad because Roman isn’t there! That’s definitely a thing.
Roman is polite enough to wait until the end of Strowman’s match before interfering. He’s really a very nice guy on the outside. He walks down to the ring with his face face on and gets a bit punched. That doesn’t stop a hero like Roman Reigns though. There’s a lets go Roman chant that convinces him to attack. The crowd cheers his offence. People are genuinely changing their opinions, aren’t they?
They Strowman powerslams him and gets a massive pop for his trouble. But it’s okay because if not for Samoa Joe and The Club, Roman would definitely have beaten Strowman, wouldn’t he?
-Handicap match against the best tag team on Raw supposedly
-That lovely video package
Did Roman Reigns beat the odds?
Took that powerslam well though, didn’t he?
NOW CHECK OUT LAST WEEK’S ARTICLE: MONDAY NIGHT REIGNS-O-METER #5: Tracking Roman Reigns’s ability to beat the odds and come out on top