SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
The following report originally published 20 years ago this week here at PWTorch.com…
WWE FRIDAY NIGHT SMACKDOWN
JANUARY 6, 2006
TAPED JAN. 3 IN WILKES-BARRE, PA.
BY WADE KELLER, PWTORCH EDITOR
-The show opened with clips of Batista responding to the sexual misconduct charges levied by Melina, then footage of Rey Mysterio & Batista losing the tag titles to MNM last week thanks to Mark Henry’s interference.
-After the Smackdown opening, Michael Cole and Tazz introduced the show and previewed the WWE Tag Title rematch in a cage. They showed the cage hanging over the ring. Also scheduled, Chris Benoit vs. Randy Orton in the latest in the Best of Seven series.
1 — JBL (w/Jillian Hall) vs. MATT HARDY — Falls Count Anywhere
Before the match, JBL said the best way to start 2006 Smackdown is with the greatest wrestler, himself. He talked about how in this match he can beat up Hardy all over the arena and even take him to the Internet kiosk where he can type in his new website, www.GoodLordHelpMeJBLsBashingMyBrainsIn.com. Cole said Hardy is accustomed to tables, ladders, and chairs. Hardy went after JBL in the crowd. The bell rang to start the match. They brawled in the stands in front of cowering, shouting, or smiling fans.
They brawled onto the announce table. Hardy dropped JBL back-first onto it and it collapsed. Hardy went for a pin, scoring a two count. Tazz said less than ten minutes into the show, the table’s “darn near exploded.” JBL threw Hardy head-first into the steps, then bashed him across the back with a chair. The match entered the ring at 2:00. After JBL bailed out to ringside, Hardy dove over the top rope onto him and scored a two count. Hardy pulled a ladder out from under the ring, then hit JBL with a trash can. He set JBL on his limo and climbed the ladder, but Jillian yanked on his leg. Then JBL knocked him off the ladder with a trash can onto the hood. He followed up with a cover for the win.
WINNER: JBL at 5:24.
STAR RATING: *1/4 — Short, but spirited brawl. The finish was pretty sudden and didn’t make Hardy look especially tough.
-After the match, Boogeyman popped out of JBL’s limo. Red smoke seeped out. Boogeyman slithered toward JBL and Jillian. JBL bailed out, but Boogeyman grabbed Hall. The camera zoomed in on Hall’s ass. Boogeyman threw a wad of live worms into his mouth and slapped them down Jillian’s skirt. She screamed in disgust and tried to shake them out of her skirt. Boogeyman gnawed on the worms and danced.
2 — MARK HENRY (w/Melina) vs. JOHN TRUSTY & ROCK ECHOES & GUS HOLISSER
It would help in these situations if everyone in the crowd didn’t think they had a fighting chance against the three scrubs. One of them made Spike Dudley look like Chris Masters.
WINNER: Henry beat each one after another in 2:34.
STAR RATING: 1/4* — Once you commit to pushing Henry, this is the safest way to establish his power and dominance.
-Cole entered the ring to interview Melina and Henry. Fans chanted “slut slut slut” at Melina. She said last week she was reluctant to announce she was suing. The crowd chanted “Batista, Batista.” She said she had to take a stand to be sure he didn’t come after her again. She said Henry is present for her protection and her protection only. She broke down and cried.
[Commercial Break]
-Backstage Randy Orton blamed Sharmell for interfering last week and costing him a win. Sharmell, of course, took issue with that, saying Orton was about to tapout. Orton said he wasn’t, then told Booker to keep Sharmell away from the ring. Orton said he will fulfill his duty and deliver the U.S. Title on a platter to Booker T. Booker reached out, but Orton pulled back and said, “Before I do, let me make it perfectly clear; you’re going to owe me one.” Booker said, “Alright.” Good exchange to establish a subplot to the match between Orton and Sharmell.
-Mr. Kennedy walked to the ring. The mic lowered from the rafters. He said he will be calling one match each week at Smackdown. He then joined Cole and Tazz, who said they had no idea what he was talking about. Kennedy said he should have brought a table since theirs was broken. Kennedy said since Smackdown moved to Friday nights, the ratings on the network have gone up 86 percent on Friday nights. He said that’s a testament to himself.
ARTICLE CONTINUED BELOW…
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3 — KID KASH vs. JUVENTUD GUERERRA — Cruiserweight Title match
Juventud rode to the ring on a lawn mower without Super Crazy and Psicosis. Kennedy said he is representing the network. He said 86 percent is nice, but 96 percent would be nicer. Juvi dove off the top rope and flipped onto Kash at ringside. Kennedy stood up and asked them if it hurt. Kash went for a moonsault, but Juvi moved. Juvi hit a series of kneelifts and kicks.
Kash applied a half boston crab at 3:30 on Juvi’s sore leg. Juvi reached the bottom rope to force a break. Tazz said, “This is a great cruiserweight match. This is how we roll on Friday nights.” Isn’t that Christian’s line? Well, not the Friday night part. Juvi came back and went for a 450 splash, but Kash moved. Kash then finished off Juvi with the brainbuster suplex for the win.
WINNER: Kash at 6:07 to retain the Cruiserweight Title.
STAR RATING: ** — Good action, well paced, with a solid story to it.
-They showed “reporters” gathered backstage for a Batista press conference.
[Commercial Break]
-Krystal interviewed Booker T and Sharmell. Booker kissed Sharmell and said, “Ah, sweet brown sugar.” Orlando Jordan interrupted and said Booker made the wrong call last week by going with Orton instead of him. He asked for a chance. Sharmell said he’d just tap out to Benoit again. Jordan said he’s tired of being laughed at. He demanded respect. Booker said the only way he’ll get respect is “getting dirty the old fashioned way.” Jordan told him to remember he said that. Booker’s eyes bugged out and Sharmell gave that sassy look she gives.
-They went to a press conference with Batista addressing the allegations. They set off an obnoxious number of flashes as he talked. He said he is innocent of the charges. “I’ve never sexually harassed anyone,” he said. “Melina and I, we were intimate, but she never said no, she never said stop. These are serious charges.” He said he’d never force himself on anyone. Henry interrupted just as the unruly reporters were shouting questions at him all at once. Henry asked Batista what his problem is, taking advantage of an innocent woman. He asked if he’s sick inside. He doubted his wholesome image. “What if it was me taking advantage of you?” asked Henry. “What if it was me?” Batista took a deep breath and said, “Mark, this isn’t the time or the place unless you say it is. If not, get out of my face.” Henry took a few steps back while staring down Batista, then walked off. Batista fumed as cameras continued flashing obnoxiously. It sounded more like a telegraph or manual typewriter.
[Commercial Break]
4 — CHRIS BENOIT vs. RANDY ORTON
Booker T and Sharmell came to ringside. Booker joined in on color. Sharmell tripped Benoit with Booker’s crutch in the opening minute. Orton called for the ref to order her to the back. Sharmell threw a fit, then retreated to the back. Orton applied a headlock and then a chinlock, then Benoit backdropped him to ringside. They cut to a break.
[Commercial Break]
Benoit hit the Three Amigos suplexes, then connected with the top rope headbutt. Benoit locked on a Sharpshooter, then shifted to a Crossface. Orton reached the bottom rope. Orton tried to slip on an RKO, but Benoit escaped it. Orton drove Benoit back-first into his knee, then set up an RKO. Orlando ran to ringside and hit Booker at ringside with the crutch, then ran into the ring and hit Benoit with it, prompting the DQ. Booker couldn’t believe what Jordan did. Cole said Booker should have shown Orlando more respect earlier.
WINNER: Benoit via DQ at 10:45 to tie the Best of Seven series 3-3.
STAR RATING: *3/4 — Basic stuff, but solid.
-The Raw Rebound aired.
[Commercial Break]
-Simon Dean asked two men to come to the ring to take on his challenge. Paul London and Brian Kendrick, sporting their “funky masks” as Tazz put it, charged to the ring. Simon said he wanted them out there to give competition to the new tag team sponsored by his patented Simon System, The Gymini (The Shane Twins/The Johnsons). For the next two minutes, Gymini destroyed London & Kendrick, who took great bumps. Gymini’s look is pretty dated, but Simon may add some personality.
-Cole plugged that the tag title cage match was next.
[Commercial Break]
-Bobby Lashley looked into the camera and said he has been invited to be part of the Royal Rumble. He said his goal is to win the Rumble and take on Batista at WrestleMania. “I like the sound of that,” he said plainly, making Lance Storm seem like The Rock.
-The cage dropped and MNM came out for the match.
[Commercial Break]
5 — MNM (Nitro & Mercury w/Melina) vs. REY MYSTERIO & BATISTA — WWE Tag Team Title match in a cage
Batista and Rey dominated the first couple minutes.
[Commercial Break]
By 7:30 MNM took control after Rey got flipped into the cage. The heels double-teamed Batista and scored some two counts. At 9:30 they double-catapulted Rey into the side of the cage. At 11:00 Rey hit a crucifix for a two count to begin his comeback. He went to the top rope, then looked t the crowd and climbed to the top of the cage. He dove onto Mercury with a crossbody block, but Nitro broke up the pin attempt. Batista recovered and began beating up MNM at 12:00.
Batista caught Nitro on the top rope and set up a BaistaBomb. Mercury grabbed Nitro’s hand to block the move. MNM each ended up crotched, though. Batista knocked their heads together, then threw Nitro into the side of the cage. Batista then gave Mercury a BatistaBomb. As Batista shook the ropes and signalled for the finish of the match, Henry crawled to the cage and yanked on the side of it. He walked around looking for a way in.
Henry then pointed at the door, yanked on the chain, and broke it. He then yanked the door off of the hinges. Cole said Henry broke the chain with ease. (In reality this took more than two minutes at the time, but they obviously edited out the two minutes of Henry trying to figure out how to get into the cage.) Henry entered the ring and hit Batista from behind as Batista was fending off MNM. Henry threw Batista into the side of the cage. Then he rammed Batista and Rey with the cage door. Mercury then draped his arm over Rey and the ref counted to three. The show ended with Henry standing on the top of the cage and Cole and Tazz asking how he could be stopped.
WINNER: MNM at 17:20.
STAR RATING: **1/2 — Good cage match. Good hype for Henry. They’re putting him over as a man who can match Batista’s power and intensity.
-A commercial plugged the final match in the Best of Seven series would take place next week on Smackdown.
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