SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
AEW DYNAMITE REPORT
AUGUST 9, 2023
COLUMBUS, OHIO AT NATIONWIDE ARENA
AIRED ON TBS
Commentators: Excalibur, Taz, Tony Schiavone
Ring Announcer: Justin Roberts
[HOUR ONE]
-After the opening played, they cut to the fans cheering as Excalibur introduced the show.
-Matt Menard stood in the ring with a mic in hand with the rest of the Jericho Appreciation Society (Tay Melo, Anna Jay, Jake Hager, Angelo Parker, Sammy Guevara, Danny Garcia) minus Chris Jericho. He introduced Jericho who came out to his music. As Jericho came out, fans sang his song and the announcers commented on a replay of Jericho accepting Don Callis’s interference last week to win his tag match.
Jericho stood in the ring with a somewhat blackened left eye. He said he wanted to come to the ring and said he knows they’ve had problems. Garcia interrupted and asked Jericho to stop talking for a minute and listen. He said he thought he was ready to have a civil conversation with him until he saw him for the first time since he got hit in the head with a baseball bat and Jericho took advantage of that and pinned him. Garcia said he sacrificed the fabric of who he is and turned his back on his hero and choose him every single time. “So I don’t get why you never choose us,” he said. Garcia said he can’t do it anymore. He danced in front of Jericho and threw his arms down and stormed out. Taz said that was quick and succinct.
Hager said he’s not surprised. He said he’s known Jericho longer than those guys and he’s made him a lot of money. He said if they has to cut ties, that’s okay because they have a lot of options. He said: “I liked that hat.” Fans cheered. (Don’t cheer that!) He then said, “I want everyone to know that I do not appreciate Jericho.” He gave Parker the mic and walked away. Parker asked, “Jake, what’re you doing?”
Jericho said before it gets out of control, he asked them if their careers aren’t bigger and better since joining them. He told Anna she could become a champion tonight and he’s proud he’s made Tay a bigger star. Tay said she used to be so proud to be in a group with him, but not any more. She said she feels sick and “I’m not even talking about the baby.” She said since he can’t make a decision, she will. She said she’ll go have the baby and come back next year and become a champion without him “because I quit.”
Anna acknowledged that Jericho has helped them, but said he’s helped himself even more. She said she’s being selfish tonight. She said she’s learned from the best, and she’s going to win the title tonight “and it’s not about appreciating you.” She dropped the mic and left.
Parker said he can’t speak for anybody else, but he doesn’t want to be doing this now. “I love being a sports entertainer,” he said. He said when he asked him to join the J.A.S., he took it as a badge of honor and tried to make him proud and he gave him everything – his identity, his trust, and his blood. He said he’s given Jericho everything he could, “but Chris, what have you given me?” Jericho stared at him as Parker said he doesn’t want to do it, but he’s got nothing left to give. He left. Excalibur said the J.A.S. were unraveling before their eyes.
Menard said Jericho was his childhood hero. He said when he was 15, he bought a Jericho t-shirt from his first paycheck from his first job. He said Jericho helped bring him to AEW and took him under his wing. He said the last 18 months have been nothing but a dream for him. Fans applauded lightly. He said it’s never sat right with him that guys he came up with such as Kevin Steen and Eddie Kingston hate his guts. “Now I’m starting to understand why.” He put the mic down. Taz said, “Man, that was stiff.”
That left Jericho and Guevara. As Jericho addressed Guevara, Guevara slapped the mic out of his hands. He said it’s time for Jericho to listen. He said he put Sting through a table, not because he wanted to, but because Jericho wanted it. He said he is loyal. He said he’s not going to walk out on him because he’s his friend. He said he always thought Jericho would do for him what he’s done for Jericho. “But maybe I was wrong,” he said. “It seems like you’ve got a lot of stuff to work out, and if you do, maybe I’ll be here.” He put the mic down and left the ring, patting Jericho on the shoulder as he walked away. Guevara walked out into the crowd as Jericho hung his head and soaked up the events. [c]
-Renee Young approached Jericho backstage and said they just witnessed the disintegration of the Jericho Appreciation Society. Don Callis walked up and apologized if he had anything to do with that. Jericho said he’s made up his mind and he’ll announce it next week. Callis patted him on the shoulder and left.
(Keller’s Analysis: If I’m the J.A.S. members, I’d be upset Jericho said he made up his mind but isn’t going to reveal it until next week! Good segment, though, and I don’t think they made it apparent what decision Jericho is going to make.) [c]
-A clip aired of FTR calling out The Young Bucks for a match at Wembley Stadium.
(1) THE YOUNG BUCKS (w/Brandon Cutler) vs. MATT & JEFF HARDY (w/Ethan Page, Brother Zay)
The Young Bucks made their entrance first. Excalibur said this will be the first two-on-two match for the Bucks since February and only the third in the last 12 months. He said they’ve been in trios matches instead. The Hardys came out next. Excalibur said ring rust might be an issue for the Bucks, but not the Hardys. (How many tag matches have Matt & Jeff had lately? And don’t trios matches count as staying sharp? It just felt like a bit of a stretch to make that a thing in this match.) The bell rang 19 minutes into the hour. The Bucks took control by 3:00. Nick landed a running corkscrew dive onto the Hardys on the floor. They cut to a split-screen break. [c/ss]
A commercial for Collision during the break focused on Collision-exclusives. The names flashed on the screen were Rusev, Thunder Rosa, Andrade El Idolo, C.M. Punk, The Bullet Club, Samoa Joe, and FTR, plus AEW Champion MJF. They also showed images of Scorpio Sky, Powerhouse Hobbs, Willow Nightingale, and Ricky Starks, but they didn’t show their names in graphics.
Jeff landed a Swanton on Nick at 9:00. Matt broke up the cover at two. Matt Jackson knocked Jeff off balance as he was springboarding. The Bucks then landed the BTE Trigger on Matt Hardy for a three count.
WINNERS: The Young Bucks in 10:00.
(Keller’s Analysis: At one point, I was thinking the Hardys vs. Bucks might be a classic tag match to feature at Wembley, and instead it was just a ten minute throwaway match on Dynamite without much build at all. I suppose the Hardys aren’t really in a place to have a showcase big stadium match at this stage, though.)
-Afterward, the Bucks approached the Hardys and shook their hands. The Hardys hugged them. Cutler gave Matt and Jeff some cold spray. The Hardys left with their crew. The Bucks and Cutler remained in the ring. Nick said, “F – T – R!” Then FTR’s music played and they came out. “Just say the letters,” said Schiavone. They agreed to a match. Excalibur then said he just got word Tony Khan made it official. “What a tag match that will be,” Taz said.
-Excalibur announced that a tournament would take place to determine who will wrestle for the AEW Women’s Title at All In in a four-way. It will feature the winner of tonight’s Shida vs. Anna Jay match, the winner of Friday’s Skye Blue vs. Saraya match on Rampage, the winner of The Bunny vs. Britt Baker on Dynamite next week, and Toni Storm receives a bye.
(Keller’s Analysis: It’s odd not having a clear cut roster split with the women yet excluding, say, Willow Nightingale from the tournament.)
-A clip aired of MJF telling Adam Cole he’d be facing him at All In in the main event.
-The latest video aired of Cole and MJF hanging out. MJF suggested they “skinny dip with rats.” Cole rejected that with force, but then suggested they go to a trampoline park. MJF crossed his arms and wasn’t into it as Cole jumped up and down on a trampoline. Cole mentioned they have dodge ball. MJF said he might have fun after all. MJF said they could’ve “gone to a bar with a bunch of hot chicks,” but instead they’re playing with kids at a trampoline park. MJF then went on to throw balls at kids. He yelled at one, “Hey you, I slept with your mom!” He told another that he’s their dad. They showed kids laid out on the ground making cartoon faces. Cole told MJF to stop it. A girl walked up to them and said, “What are two grown men doing at a trampoline park. You two are nerds.” Cole bent over and told her she shouldn’t talk like that. She gave him a middle finger and turned and left. Cole then told MJF to throw the ball at her. They cut away as MJF wound up. [c]
-They showed the exterior of Nationwide Arena.
-Highlights aired of the wild brawl last week on Dynamite and the Parking Lot fight on Rampage two nights later.
-Jon Moxley told Claudio Castagnoli and Wheeler Yuta that that Best Friends don’t belong in the ring with them, much less a parking lot. He said they specialize in picking the bones of their kills and leaving no doubt. Claudio told Pac he can’t walk back in after six months and stab them in the back, so he made him pay. Yuta said it must sting that Pac is going to miss Wembley. Mox said the B.C.C. doesn’t fear death, death fears them.
-Excalibur said Pac is out with an injury and Claudio is taking credit.
(2) JACK PERRY vs. ROB VAN DAM – FTW Title match
Justin Roberts said the match would be fought under FTW Rules, so falls count anywhere. The bell rang 47 minutes into the hour. RVD slapped away an insincere handshake offer from Perry. RVD took early control. Perry raked his eyes and rammed him into the ringside stairs. RVD dropped Perry over the ringside barricade and then leaped off the ring apron with a spinning wheel kick that landed on Perry’s back with big force. RVD celebrated as they cut to a split-screen break. [c/ss]
RVD had Perry down in the corner of the ring after the break and then hit a Van Daminator. Fans chanted, “RVD!” RVD put a chair on Perry and then landed a running flip senton followed by a two count. Perry caught a chair that RVD threw and then threw it at RVD, but RVD ducked and the ref got hit with it instead and went down.
RVD climbed to the top rope, but Perry knocked him off balance. Perry raked RVD’s eyes, but RVD shoved Perry off the top rope through a table at ringside. RVD went after Perry at ringside and threw him back into the ring. RVD then landed his Five-Star Frogsplash. The ref was still down when RVD made the cover. Fans counted to ten. Another ref ran out, but Perry kicked out just before three. Perry gave RVD a low blow and then shoved him into a chair wedged in the corner. Perry rolled up RVD for the win. Taz said the low blow is legal in an FTW Rules match
WINNER: Perry in 9:00 to retain the FTW Title.
(Keller’s Analysis: RVD pulled off an RVD-style match as a burst of nostalgia and a little rub for Perry to have had a moment in the ring with him.)
-Renee interviewed Alex Abrahantes and the Lucha Bros. Alex said the Lucha Brothers fight in the spirit of competition, while BCC fight to maim their opponents. Rey Fenix and Pentagon spoke a few words too, mostly in Spanish.
-MJF and Adam Cole came out to their blended entrance song. Excalibur told Taz it does seem like MJF has turned over a new leaf.
(Keller’s Analysis: That’s the problem with the “fun yet campy” skit they aired. MJF was pelting little kids in the head with balls, which doesn’t go well with the idea he’s a new person. They’re asking everyone to just look at that skit as totally part of another narrative universe where it’s just a pretend skit and not real at all and to ignore how MJF acted.)
[HOUR TWO]
MJF said, “Majestic Midwest, the Devil has arrived!” He said apparently there’s footage going around that everyone in the Midwest is mid. He said that footage was heavily edited and very fake. Cole smiled and raised his thumb. MJF said, “May God strike me down where I stand if what I’m saying is not the truth when I say my favorite place in the United States of America is the Midwest.” He cowered and winced, waiting for lightning, and then cheered when he was still alive.
Cole asked who was ready for storytime. He said yes, they’ll be wrestling for MJF’s AEW Championship at All In and he said he’ll beat him for it. MJF interrupted and asked if he wants a promo battle. “Okay, okay,” MJF said. “Adam Cole, you are so skinny and ghostly pale white, if this was the ’80s, Hogan would have snorted you.” He looked at the camera and mocked Cole having brain problems that cross his eyes and affect his thinking. Cole tried to stop him. MJF called him “noodle-armed.” Cole yelled that he doesn’t want to do a promo battle. Fans booed. MJF said he’s sorry and he totally misread the situation.
Cole said they’re going to make history at Wembley. He said the fans love them as a tag team, though, and they’d love to see them win the tag team titles. He said as difficult as it was to not win the tag titles, he has had his eyes on another set of titles. He said those mean just as much to him as the AEW belts. He said he’s talking about the ROH Tag Team Titles. He said he owes his entire career to ROH. He said the pro wrestling the fans now know and love is thanks to ROH. He said he’s a former ROH World Champion three times, plus a former ROH TV Champion and Survival of the Fittest Championship, but he’s never held the ROH Tag Team Titles. He mentioned the Kings of Wrestling, Red Dragon, and Mark & Jay Briscoe. He said they set the bar. He said before the PPV at Wembley, there’s a Zero Hour pre-show. He said they should win those tag team titles before All In.
MJF said it’s a great story, but he asked if he really is asking him to wrestle twice in one night. “What, are you some kind of sick pervert?” he said. Fans chanted, “Pervert.” He said, “Daddy’s a sucker for a cheap pop.” He agreed to the match after asking the fans if they wanted to see them win the ROH Tag Team Titles.
Roderick Strong walked out and interrupted. Strong said he can’t believe Cole wants to win the ROH Tag Team Titles with MJF instead of him, his real best friend. MJF called him a simp and said he’s tired of his “weirdo jealous ex-girlfriend vibes.” He said he wants him to do whatever it is weird generic white people do in this situation. “I want you to get in your car and go home and run up the stairs and slam the door to your room and jump into bed and cry into your Hello Kitty pillow and put your headphones on and listen to some Taylor Swift and shake it off you bland bitch.” Strong paced angrily on the stage. Schiavone called Strong “the wet blanket in all this.” Excalibur said he’s been trying to look out for Cole, but he’s been proven wrong. Strong asked Cole if he’s seriously going to let him talk to him like that. Strong said the Kingdom was right about Cole when he said he was never really his friend. Mike Bennett and Matt Taven walked out. They hugged Strong.
MJF said, “Can you believe that guy?” Cole turned around and shoved MJF hard. He told MJF he’s his friend, but he’s also Strong’s friend. Do you understand me?” He poked MJF in the chest. MJF scowled at him. Cole paused and apologized. Fans chanted, “Hug it out!” MJF agreed to hug it out. MJF said it’s fine and he told Cole to “go check on your boy.” Cole walked to the back. MJF said it’s cool and he applauded and held up his belt as fans cheered.
(Keller’s Analysis: Hmmm. Does something significant happen in that Zero Hour tag match or is just a way to increase viewership for the free pre-show to get more people to buy the PPV.)
-A video package aired recapping Collision.
-BCC made their ring entrance as they cut to a split-screen break. [c/ss]
(3) THE LUCHA BROS. (Penta El Zero Miedo & Rey Fenix w/Alex Abrahantes) vs. JON MOXLEY & CLAUDIO CASTAGNOLI (w/Wheeler Yuta)
The Lucha Bros. attacked Mox and Claudio from behind as Mox and Claudio were staring at the entrance stage. The bell rang 18 minutes into the hour. They cut to a split-screen break at 4:00 as Claudio had Fenix grounded with an armbar. [c/ss]
Fenix and Penta eventually made a comeback. All four ended up down on the mat at 9:00 after Fenix superkicked Mox in the chin. At 12:00 Mox and Penta exchanged strikes. Yuta grabbed Fenix’s boot as he climbed to the top rope. Alex yanked him down. Fenix flipped onto Yuta at ringside. Meanwhile, Moxley rolled up Fenix and yanked on his trunks for the three count.
WINNERS: Moxley & Claudio in 13:00.
-Afterward, BCC attacked the Lucha Brothers three-on-two. Claudio yanked off Fenix’s mask and then put it on himself. “This is horrible,” said Schiavone. Claudio gave the camera two middle fingers. Mox yelled, “Zero Respect! That’s what happens!” Excalibur said he’s not sure if there’s a more powerful force in AEW than the BCC.
-Alex Marvez approached Kenny Omega backstage. He brought up the Bucks agreeing to fight FTR, then asked what’s in store for him at Wembley. Omega said he’s sitting down with Jim Ross next week to talk about his future, Callis, Takeshita, and Wembley. Marvez asked, “Can you give me a scoop? Anything?”
(Keller’s Analysis: Marvez’s acting skills as “a reporter hungry for scoops” leaves him no dignity. He’s like a parody of a reporter in a Simpson’s episode.)
-The Embassy made their way to the ring, led by Swerve Strickland and Prince Nana. Nana told fans to shut up. Swerve talked about what they did to Nick Wayne last week. He said the Embassy is above the law and nobody can do anything about it. A.R. Fox called Darby Allin to “bring your ass out here.” Darby then walked out. He told Fox to tell everyone the whole story. He said he tried to call him, but he’d never answer. He said he lived with him and his demons and he tried to help him. He said he’s got friends, too. The lights went out. Schiavone said, “Wait a minute! Hold the phone!” When they came back on, Sting was beating up The Embassy members with his bat. It came down to him and Swerve. Sting put the bat up against Swerve’s chin. Fans chanted, “Sting!” Sting then pointed at the All In logo on the big screen. Swerve bailed out to ringside. Sting’s music played as Excalibur talked about Sting “seemingly” issuing a challenge for All In.
-Excalibur hyped Rampage: Darby vs. Brian Cage, Saraya vs. Blue, Orange Cassidy vs. Johnny TV. Then Collision: House of Black vs. CMFTR, The Acclaimed in action, plus Mercedes Martinez & Diamante vs. Kris Statlander & Willow Nightingale. Dynamite: J.R.’s interview with Omega, MJF and Cole talk about their match, The Bunny vs. Baker, and Darby & Wayne vs. Gates of Agony. Wembley: MJF vs. Cole, FTR vs. The Bucks, Sting & Darby vs. Swerve & Fox in a Coffin Match, plus the Four-Way for the AEW Women’s Title. [c]
(4) HIKARU SHIDA vs. ANNA JAY – AEW Women’s Title match
Jay made her entrance first. Then Shida. The bell rang 50 minuets into the hour. They cut to a break at 3:00. [c/ss]
With Shida on the attack at ringside, she leaped onto a chair. Parker and Menard blocked her. Jay then rammed Shida’s face into the ringside steps. She then scored a two count in the ring. Jay put Shida in a sleeper next. Shida climbed to the second rope with Jay on her back still applying the sleeper. She leaped backwards to break it, then landed a Falcon Arrow for a near fall. Shida then landed a spinning knee to the side of Jay’s head for the pin. Parker tried to interfere, but couldn’t. Shida held up the belt and mentioned she’d be defending it at Wembley.
WINNER: Shida in 9:00 to retain the AEW Women’s Title.
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.