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The following report originally published 10 years ago this week here at PWTorch.com…
KELLER’S TNA IMPACT WRESTLING REPORT
TAPED IN THE U.K.
FEBRUARY 16, 2016
AIRED ON POP TV
[HOUR ONE]
-Clips aired of last week’s show-closing angle with Matt Hardy and EC3.
-They showed EC3 arriving at the venue in the parking garage. He saw Dixie Carter and approached her. She said they should have a much longer conversation than this. EC3 interrupted and snapped that she is right. He said his life’s mission is to make sure Hardy doesn’t remain in the company because he’s bad for the company. Dixie said he will get that rematch next week in London at Lockdown inside the Six Sides of Steel. He said he also has something very personal to take care of, and he’s going to do it right now.
-The Impact opening aired.
-EC3 walked to the ring to his ring entrance music. He hesitantly slapped a few hands of fans and acted like he was trying a new food and kind of liked it. He slapped a few more hands and skipped into the ring. He said he knows who he is and knows what he’s done. He said two-and-a-half years ago he walked into TNA Wrestling with a giant chip on his shoulder. He said he has defeated legends and hall of famers, but the only name he’s concerned with right now is Matt Hardy. He said he had one word for Hardy: “Rematch.” He said he’ll be locked inside a cage against Hardy next week with his rage and vengeance. He said his fists need something to punch, and he’d like to start with Tyrus this week. He said he’s probably busy babysitting the Matt & Reby’s baby, perhaps even breast feeding it, but come to the ring anyway.
Tyrus walked out onto the stage. He told EC3 he doesn’t want it. EC3 called him “sloppy tits” and said he does want it, so come to the ring and get it on. Tyrus told EC3 that he’s doing something he’s never done before – standing alone. He said he’s had someone watching his back his entire life, and he knows his secrets and that he’s afraid to be alone. He said he respected him so much, he called him “Boss,” but a boss is someone who controls things and takes care of business and makes things happen and, most important, is loyal to the people who watch his back. He said he doesn’t want or need this. He entered the ring and stepped into EC3’s face. He said he will end him.
EC3 asked, “You done?” Tyrus said he is. EC3 hit Tyrus in the face with the mic. Tyrus fought back and knocked EC3 to the floor with a heart punch. As EC3 fought back, Matt ran out and jumped EC3. He was wearing the TNA World Hvt. Title belt around his waist, which was a nice touch, giving off the impression he walks around with it on all the time. Tyrus held EC3 in the ring as Hardy slapped him. When Hardy grabbed a chair and was going to swing it at EC3 as Tyrus held him, EC3 broke free and swung the chair around, so Hardy and Tyrus fled.
Hardy said EC3 is a tough man with a chair in hand, apparently, but how about a fair two-on-two fight later in the show, assuming he can find anyone willing to stand by his side.
(WK Reax: Very good opening segment. EC3 isn’t just instantly turning into a smiling hand-slapping babyface acting like the last two-and-a-half years never happened. I loved his subtle introduction to slapping hands with fans and shrugging like it wasn’t so bad after all. Hardy, who was going to use a chair seconds earlier but fled the ring as soon as EC3 grabbed it from him, used great heel psychology to hypocritically accuse EC3 with a straight face of only being tough guy when he has a chair in his hand. Tyrus deserves credit for playing his part in this ongoing saga really well, too.)
-Josh Mathews wondered if EC3 could find a partner. Josh also plugged the “hideous, gruesome Monster’s Ball” tag team title match later. [c]
-Eric Young and Bram entered the ring. Young told the fans they are looking at the King of the Mountain and “God.” He said he knows one person who won’t be taking that title from him – Jeff Hardy. He was interrupted by the sound of a beer can opening. Young got wide-eyed as Beer Money stepped onto the stage. Roode said if Young is looking for someone tough, take a look at them. He said they are ready and willing to go to the ring and kick both of their asses. Young said they already had their chance and he beat them all over the place. James Storm told Young to shut up because this isn’t Jerry Springer, it’s Impact Wrestling. The crowd chanted “TNA! TNA!” Storm said Young has never defeated him. He said he came back not to yap on the microphone, but to kick asses and his is next.
(1) ERIC YOUNG (w/Bram) vs. JAMES STORM (w/Robert Roode)
Storm went to work aggressively on Young, including a DDT off the middle rope. Interference from Bram turned the match in Young’s favor. They ended up attacking Storm two-on-one at ringside as the ref yelled at Roode to stay in his corner. Storm eventually rallied and set up his finisher, so Bram ran in. Roode intercepted him. A brawl broke out with all four, and Earl Hebner let the match continue since Roode cut off Bram before he made contact with Storm. Instead, Young and Storm were counted out. Josh said the combatants “could care less.” They brawled over the security barrier at ringside and into the crowd.
WINNER: Double countout in 4:00.
(WK Reax: Storm & Roode back together doing their Beer Money act is money well spent by TNA. They have credibility in the ring, but levity and playfulness that lightens up the tone of the show without coming across as a mid-card comedy act as a result. Storm was really good as the cult leader – better than Bray Wyatt – and showed real range, and I think it’s actually helped him have a credible swagger as he returned to this role.)
-They stayed with the brawl for a couple minutes and then once they brawled off camera to the back, they cut elsewhere backstage.
-Drew Galloway walked up to EC3 and said they have to talk. He told EC3 to relax because, while they haven’t gotten along in the past, they have a common goal. EC3 said that’s true. He said they both want the World Hvt. Title. He thanked him for his offer to team with him, but he said tonight he has to stand alone. Drew said he respects that and that’s his choice, but this right here – his briefcase – is his choice and he’ll cash it in whenever, wherever.
-Josh plugged EC3 vs. Tyrus & Hardy later, plus up next The Miracle with Maria Kanellis Bennett. [c]
-They joined the brawl backstage between Beer Money and Young & Bram, which was still going on. They brawled into the industrial laundry room. Then they cut away for no reason in particular.
-Maria stepped out onto the stage and introduced herself as the First Lady of Professional Wrestling. She said she’s there to introduce a future World Hvt. Champion. She said he will inspire the fans because he inspires her. Out stepped Bennett. When he entered the ring, he said he is going to be the future World Champion. He said every wrestler in the back has taken notice. He said that’s why Kurt Angle took a cheap shot at him and ran away. He said Drew is walking around with the briefcase, but it’s just a ticking time bomb because he’s going to lose and fail and prove to every idiot fan that he’s a failure. He said he is dressed to wrestle and he wants to wrestle one of the UK’s own. He said he chose Mark Andrews.
(2) MIKE BENNETT vs. MARK ANDREWS
Andrews came to the ring on a skateboard. Bennett said he’s impressed with what he’s seen, but it’s going to take a miracle for him to win. Andrews told him to shut the hell up and took the first swing. Andrews rallied, but when he climbed to the top rope, Bennett knocked him off balance and gave him a cutter off the top rope. Bennett then finished Andrews with the MIP (Miracle in Progress) for the win.
WINNER: Bennett in 2:00.
-After the match he stomped away at Andrews. When Josh criticized Bennett, Pope said he’s just reviving him with stomps. Drew came out for the save. Bennett challenged him to come into the ring. When Drew obliged, Bennett bailed out and waved goodbye and blew a kiss.
(WK Reax: I think Bennett & Maria are coming along nicely as a new top tier act in TNA. A feud with Drew is a good “next step” in his climb to presumably eventually a feud with EC3.)
-Backstage Abyss, Rosemary, and Crazy Steve talked about the Monster’s Ball match coming up from behind a cage wall. Abyss said Rosemary will be the most beautiful woman at the Ball. They shared sinister laughter. A guy walked up to the cage and said he thought about their offer, but he wants nothing to do with them. He blew a kiss. He was wearing all white and looked like he’d fit right in with them. Two blown kisses in back-to-back segments. What are the odds?
-Josh wondered who in the hell that guy was. Josh then plugged Monster’s Ball.
(WK Reax: I like the touch of Decay hanging out in a cage together backstage, like a dog who voluntarily sleeps in his kennel because it feels safe and secure and cozy.) [c]
-The roving reporter asked Drew, along with Andrews, why he got involved in the situation with Andrews. He said Bennett is an asshole and he thinks he can impose his will against guys of the future like Andrews. He said he runs his mouth really good but doesn’t stay around to fight. Bennett then jumped both of them from behind. Drew fought back and warned Maria to stay away. The Maria distraction opened up Bennett to attack Drew and kick him against a garbage door backstage. Bennett asked, “How is that for a fight?” [c]
-A vignette aired that said: “Some men are smart, some men are fast, some men are strong, but only one man is great. Odarg the Great is coming!” They showed a silhouette of someone who looked like they had a tiny alien body and big head.
-Backstage Hardy and Tyrus, in an echoey room, had Rock Star Spud held captive. Hardy said he shouldn’t stick his nose in their business ever again. He said EC3 is not a good guy and Spud is the sum of the people he keeps. He asked if he understands him. Hardy patted Spud hard on his chest and said, “Okay, good talk,” and left. Tyrus straighten out Spud’s suit before leaving, which was a nice touch.
-Josh plugged the Angle vs. Bobby Lashley match in three weeks in Angle’s final match ever on Impact. A video package aired on Angle and Lashley wrestling March 20, 2015 last year in London and getting Lashley to tapout to win the TNA World Hvt. Title.
-Jeremy Borash introduced the Monster’s Ball match as Decay came out to Marilyn Manson’s “The Nobodies.” Josh said Monster’s Ball is not for the weak of heart, and it’s the specialty match of Abyss. The Wolves came out next.
(3) THE WOLVES vs. DECAY (Abyss & Crazy Steve w/Rosemary) – TNA World Tag Team Title match
They brawled at the start at ringside. Steve threw Davey Richards into the ringside barrier. Steve pulled a table out from under the ring. Abyss pulled a barbed wire table out from under the ring. They cut to a break.
(WK Reax: I’d like to see TNA lead the way in stopping the interruption of matches with commercials and treat the action in the ring as too vital to break away from, especially a title match. It just doesn’t happen in any other sport, and pro wrestling is portraying itself as a sport. It’s just completely illogical that the promotion, if it’s fulfilling its ostensible goal to bring fans coverage of fights that matter, that they’d choose to position commercials during matches rather than right before and right after. There’s no good reason to do this, and it’s based on a stale rationale that never really made sense.) [c]
The Wolves were in control after the break. They stuck a ladder in Steve’s crotch and then bashed the other end of the ladder with chairs. The Wolves climbed to the top rope, but Rosemary sprayed mist in the eyes of Richards and then Abyss threw a chair at Edwards, knocking him off the top rope through a table at ringside. Abyss pulled Janice out from under the ring. Abyss swung Janice at Richards, but Richards ducked and Janice got stuck in the top turnbuckle.
Richards gave Steve an exploder suplex into the ladder leaning in the corner. Abyss chokeslammed Davey. A weak “This is awesome” chant could be heard for a few seconds. Abyss stacked chairs on Richards, then bashed him with a trash can. Edwards crawled back into the ring and kicked Abyss. Abyss knocked Edwards off balance on the top rope, but Edwards head-butted Abyss when he met him at the top, and then he sunset flipped Abyss off the top rope onto the back of the trash can. In this era of concussion awareness, it’s despicable to include a match and expect fans in 2016 to think it’s a cool spot.
ARTICLE CONTINUED BELOW…
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[HOUR TWO]
Edwards bashed Steve with a kendo stick. He played to the crowd, but was stopped by a low blow by Steve. The Wolves double-teamed Steve seconds later, although in a nice touch Edwards was still selling the low blow. Richards held a chair on Steve’s back as Edwards leaped off the top rope with a double stomp. When Abyss pulled out his black bag a minute later, Pope said it’s usually tacks but it could be anything in that bag. Edwards kicked Abyss and knocked the bag out of his hands. He dove through the ropes at Abyss and tried to knock Abyss into the table, but Abyss caught him. Davey, though, dove through the ropes and knocked Abyss into the barbed wire board. Fans chanted “TNA! TNA!”
Steve set up a chair as a louder “This is awesome!” chant broke out. Steve set Edward’s head on the chair and then grabbed another chair. Rosemary entered the ring and stepped in front of Steve. She held up the black bag and untied it. She poured thumb tacks onto Edwards’ head. Steve then swung the chair, but Edwards pulled his head out of the chair. Why did he wait so long?
Anyway, Steve picked up the chair again. Edwards met the chair swing with Janice. Edwards grabbed Rosemary and held her mouth and arms behind her. Then Richards forced a kiss on her. Richards then blew mist at Rosemary’s face. Josh said, “Davey Richards sucked the mist out of Rosemary!” Edward put tacks on a chair and then Richards suplexed Steve onto the chair as Edwards super kicked him. Edwards made the cover and scored the pin. Afterward, Josh said Abyss is still stuck in the barbed wire board at ringside. He called it one of the best Monster’s Ball matches ever.
WINNERS: The Wolves in 13:00 to retain the TNA Tag Team Titles.
(WK Reax: Just about everything passé and awful about the burned out and spent “hardcore style” wrapped up in one nice 13 minute package. Abyss is better than continually putting himself in garbage hack brawls like this over and over. He should have more self-esteem than to just settle for this when his work in the ring could be so much better. I’m torn on whether the forced kiss doesn’t count as misogyny because it was Richards instead merely sucking the mist out of Rosemary’s mouth.)
-EC3 crossed paths with Rock Star Spud backstage. Spud said he wanted to talk first for once. He said last week he wanted to try to do the right thing. He said they have a lot of history together – some good and some really frickin’ bad. EC3 said Spud looks out for others a little too much. He said his tag match later is for him and him alone. He walked away. Spud soaked up the rejection.
-Josh wondered if EC3 understands what he’s getting into tonight. He then plugged The Dollhouse vs. Gail Kim & Madison Rayne up next. [c]
(4) THE DOLLHOUSE vs. GAIL KIM & MADISON RAYNE
WINNERS: Kim & Rayne in 3:00 when Rayne pinned Marti on a roll-through.
-After the match the Doll House attacked a celebrating Kim & Rayne from behind. Velvet Sky ran out for the save. Josh said she was taken out by the Doll House weeks ago, but is now making her return. She dropped all the heels and cleared the ring. She said on the mic afterward, “Where you going Dog House? I was just getting started.” She said she didn’t fly all the way to the UK so they can run to their kennels. She said they’ve been poking those ugly noses where they doesn’t belong for too long. She challenged them to a first-time match for the Knockouts – a no escape match where weapons are legal – Lethal Lockdown. Josh said he likes it.
-Backstage Mahabali Shera told the roving reporter that his friend from India is coming to TNA – Odarg the Great. It was obviously Grado. He said he heard that Shera was being given grief and being punched in the face, so he decided to come help him. “I am a good guy and I do good things to good people,” he said. He said Shera picked him, Odarg the Great! Josh said, “Seriously?”
(WK Reax: I get a kick out of Grado. This is a good way for him to stay around after being fired in “Feast of Fired.”) [c]
-They showed that the fight was still going on backstage between Young & Bram and Beer Money. Storm choked Young with a rope. Roode threw a chair at Bram’s head. Eventually Beer Money drove Young & Bram into retreat. Roode looked at the camera and issued a challenge for a Beer Money vs. Young & Bram match in a cage at Lockdown.
(5) JESSE GODDERZ & ELI DRAKE vs. MAHABALI SHERA & ODARG THE GREAT
Shera danced to the ring. Drake asked for the music to be cut off because he had enough. Drake said he doesn’t have time to wonder who his secret special partner is, so let’s get to it. Borash introduced Odarg. Pope said even though Odarg is trying to hide his identity, he still came out with a fanny pack. He compared it to if Midnight Rider (Dusty Rhodes) came out with a cowboy hat and a cowbell. Josh said he came to the ring to the same music as he did as Grado. Grado rallied and dropped his strap and then hit Eli with a cannonball in the corner. Jesse broke up Odarg’s pin attempt. Shera then gave Jesse a Sky High sitout powerbomb. Drake tried to yank off Odarg’s mask. Grado took his own mask off and then schoolboyed Eli, staring at him as the ref counted to three. Grado hid under the ring afterward. Josh said Grado wanted to humiliate Drake by pinning him without his mask.
WINNER: Shera & Odarg in 5:00.
(WK Reax: I suppose if someone was going to screw up the mystery masked man gimmick for someone who got fired or lost a “loser leaves town” type of match, it’d be Grado. By unmasking voluntarily, doesn’t this mean that TNA leadership has to address this next week and not allow Odarg to continue appearing in any way as part of TNA? That’d be a shame as it was a good first week for a fun character doing a fun gimmick. They could have drawn this out, but now they really have no choice but to discontinue it, right?) [c]
-Backstage Eli was ranting and raving to Jesse who was chuckling. Eli said there is nothing funny about this. Odarg showed up and told Drake that he’s going to fighting Odarg the Great at Lockdown. Jesse laughed and Drake yelled, “What the hell is going on?”
-Josh and Pope plugged the Lockdown line-up next week.
-Matt Hardy and Tyrus made their ring entrance for the main event. EC3 then made his ring entrance. He came out alone. Matt laughed at EC3 coming out alone. Josh commended EC3 for his bravery, but questioned whether it’s wise since next week he faces Hardy for the TNA World Title.
(6) MATT HARDY & TYRUS vs. EC3
The bell rang 45 minutes into the second hour. Tyrus opened against EC3. EC3 got in the initial offense. Tyrus caught EC3 and overhead suplexed him. As they cut to a break, Josh said they’d find out if EC3 could get back into this handicapped match next. [c]
Hardy was beating down EC3 after the break. As Hardy set up the Twist of Fate, Rock Star Spud came out to offer to be EC3’s partner. As EC3 made a comeback, the crowd chanted “We Want Spud!” Spud got the hot-tag and punched away at Hardy. Eventually, though, the heels took control. Tyrus took Spud down with a heart punch. A minute later Spud hot-tagged EC3 who went to work on Hardy. He showed great babyface fire as he rallied against Hardy.
He setup the One Percenter, but Tyrus interfered. He said next week at Lockdown, Tyrus can’t get involved. When Hardy and Tyrus regrouped at ringside, EC3 leaped off the top rope at them. Instead of landing on them, he landed between them and hit the mat at ringside with a thud, but stood up and acted like his move worked. Hardy and Tyrus sold it like they were hit.
Back in the ring Tyrus from the ring apron yanked EC3’s neck over the top rope. Hardy hit a Side Effect for a two count at 12:00. Tyrus entered and set up a Spike, but Spud gave Tyrus a low-blow from behind. Tyrus went down. Hardy then gave Spud a Twist of Fate. EC3, though, got up and gave Hardy a One Percenter and scored the pin. Josh took the drama out of the pin by saying, as the ref made the first count, that “if this happens next week, EC3 is the World Champion.”
WINNER: EC3 & Spud in 13:00.
-After the match, Spud got up and acknowledged EC3 with a quick bow before leaving the ring. Josh said EC3 can take all of his rage and fury to Lockdown next week.
(WK Reax: It’s cool how gradually, in step by step stages, TNA is moving EC3 into the babyface role. I do wonder if EC3 will change the name of his finisher from the One Percenter to something else, though? Maybe the ASP, the “Anti-Super-Pac”? The moment early in the show where he walked to the ring and hesitated before slapping hands, almost giving off a vibe that he wasn’t sure he should touch “commoners” who might have “poor germs,” only to give in and then seem to like it, was masterful as part of a transition. He’s warming up to the idea of being with the people, and we’re seeing it happen rather than just one week he shows up acting totally different and we’re just supposed to accept it.)
FINAL THOUGHTS: A few stumbles, but Impact Wrestling remains an entertaining and relevant weekly pro wrestling series this year. I’d like to see better wrestling, including from the long vaunted Knockouts Division that now pales compared to NXT and WWE’s women’s divisions. The announcing is a weak point, too, these days, and it stands out more when the booking is so solid.
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