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KELLER’S WWE SMACKDOWN REPORT
DECEMBER 6, 2019
AIRED LIVE ON FOX NETWORK
Announcers: Michael Cole, Corey Graves
-They opened with a recap of what happened with Daniel Bryan last week
-Miz made his ring entrance as Cole introduced the show. Fayetteville, you did not make the cut of the cities WWE is proud enough to tout visiting. It didn’t even make the screen graphic, much less Cole mentioning at the top of the show. (There literally has to be a memo or a meeting or a message sent to announcers and graphics people telling them which cities “don’t make the cut” because they’re too shamefully small market or southern or whatever their criteria is.) As Miz walked out, Cole talked about the disturbing scene last week with Bryan and Bray, and he said nobody has seen or heard from Bryan in the week since. Graves talked about how The Fiend apparently yanked hair from the scalp of Bryan.
Miz said his guest for Miz TV was supposed to be Daniel Bryan, but due to the horrific events of last week, Bryan has disappeared. Boos. Miz said he’s known Bryan since he first stepped foot inside WWE, and they’ve never been friends and probably never will be. He said he does know how much Bryan means to the WWE Universe, though. He said for the first time in a long time they saw the real Daniel Bryan and the rebirth of the Yes Movement. He said The Fiend yanked that away and since then Bryan hasn’t been seen. He said he doesn’t like Bryan, but he does care, and he will find out.
The Firefly Funhouse music played. On the big screen, Bray Wyatt showed up. There was a picture of Bryan on the wall with his mouth and eyes covered in red marker with X’s. He mockingly talked about Miz trying to solve the mystery. He said Miz doesn’t want to know what happened to Bryan. “I’m not sure I want to know,” he said. He said Bryan could be with “them.” Cue ominous sounds. Bray said “he” might not be done with Bryan yet. He said Bryan was going to come play with him at TLC, but now he doesn’t think he’ll be there. Bray asked if maybe Miz would like to come play instead. Miz said this isn’t about him, it’s about Bryan, who is like family to Smackdown. Bray made mock sad noises. Ramblin’ Rabbit popped up and said family is the word of the day. Bray shoved him back down, then said “family” is the word of the day. Then an image appeared of The Wyatt Family. He solemnly said, “I used to have a family.” He said Miz inspired him and now he has a chance to join a new family. He said if he believes, he can achieve it. Bray held up a picture of Miz, his wife, and his two young kids. “So, do you want to come and play with me now?” Bray asked. He laughed maniacally. Miz heard enough and headed to the back, where apparently the Funhouse takes place. The Firefly Funhouse jingle played.
(Keller’s Analysis: So they might be shifting from Bray vs. Bryan to Bray vs. Miz at TLC. Probably not a bad idea since TLC appears to be an afterthought of a PPV, whereas Bray vs. Bryan – if they have a rematch – can be revved up enough to co-headline the Royal Rumble.) [c]
-A local commercial aired for the TLC PPV in Minneapolis, Minn. with the Kabuki Warriors defending against Charlotte & Becky Lynch, Roman Reigns vs. Baron Corbin in a TLC match, and Rusev vs. Bobby Lashley one-on-one. Those matches have been advertised the last couple weeks locally.
-A concerned Miz told Maryse on the phone to calm down and everything will be fine. He told her to lock the doors and the set the alarm just to be safe, and he has no choice but to do something about it. “We don’t know what he’s capable of, I’m not risking anything, I’m getting a flight back home tonight.”
-They went to Cole and Graves at ringside. They expressed concern for the situation with Bray. Cole said everything he touches changes. Graves said he hopes this works out for Miz and his family.
(1) MANDY ROSE (w/Sonya Deville) vs. ALEXA BLISS (w/Nikki Cross)
Graves gave a shout out to Jessica Carr, the first full-time female referee on Smackdown. That might be the last time her name is mentioned on TV since they generally have omitted mentioning referees by name. Mandy grounded Bliss and them yanked off her eyelashes. Graves said Bliss has been a fraud all along. Cole said, “Oh, the humiliation!” Graves said Carr’s name again, so it’s been mentioned again already. Rose yelled at Bliss, “You will never look like me!” Bliss fired up and took over the match, stomping Mandy’s face into the mat. Deville distracted Bliss on the ring apron. Cross tackled Deville. Rose rolled up Bliss for a two count. Bliss quickly took over and climbed up to the top rope and landed Twisted Bliss for the win. They showed a close-up of Rose yanking off Bliss’s lashes. Yikes.
WINNER: Bliss in 4:00.
-They hyped that Baron Corbin has vowed to humiliate Roman Reigns, plus Reigns would wrestle Dolph Ziggler.
-Backsage they showed Dana Brooke at catering for no apparent reason. Then Drake Maverick walked up to her and confronted her about reading on social media that she’s going on a date with Batista. He said he felt rejected because he felt they had a spark last week. Elias walked in and said when words fail us, a song can provide the answers. He strummed his guitar and sang. He said Batista is a millionaire and he’s tall, so Drake has a better chance to get lucky with a blow-up doll. He said he has marriage issues and “the only action you’ve been getting is with lotion and tissues,” he said. Elias then said Drake’s wife woke up in his bed. Drake slapped him and walked away. Dana asked if that really happened with his wife. Elias said, “No, but something is going to happen.”
(Keller’s Analysis: So Elias is upset that Drake slapped him after he bragged about having sex with his wife?) [c]
-A commercial aired for Raw hyping Rey Mysterio defending his U.S. Title against A.J. Styles.
-In the ring, Drake said everyone thinks it’s funny that his life is in shambles. Fans chanted “Yes!” He told Elias that nobody gets away with making a mockery out of him or his marriage or his beautiful wife. He called Elias to the ring for a fight. Elias’s entrance theme played. Cole said Drake put his 24/7 Title above his marriage. Dana walked out with Elias with his guitar. Graves wondered what “Big Dave” thinks of Dana accompanying Elias to the ring, but added, “Although it’s 2019, I don’t know what people are into anymore.” Elias easily avoided Drake charging at him, then picked him up by his belt and set him on his knee and spanked him. Elias and Dana laughed. Then he wound up and kicked him in the butt, sending him flying head-first through the ropes. There seemed to be more awkwardness in the crowd than laughter or heat. Brooke threw Drake back into the ring. Elias then gave him a Drift Away. Cole said maybe Drake will learn a lesson that when you’re married, you shouldn’t be hitting on Dana. Brooke put her foot on Drake’s chest. Elias counted to three.
(Keller’s Analysis: I have no idea if anyone in that segment was supposed to be likable, but I am sure nothing seemed to get over as particularly entertaining or funny to the fans.)
-They showed Miz marching backstage, when he noticed a door slightly ajar with red light. He kicked open the door and looked around. The lights then went dark and there was a photo on a table of Miz’s family, except Miz was replaced with an image of Bray. Bray then said, “Say cheese.” He gave Miz a Sister Abigail and laughed, then sang, “There’s no place like home for the holidays!” [c]
-A ref checked on Miz backstage who was just standing up and catching his breath. Miz asked where the photo is and where Bray went. The ref said he’d go find help for Miz.
-They went to the announcers on camera. Graves said the depravity of Bray knows no bounds. He said Miz should just get home and be safe with his family.
-Cole threw to a video package of WWE wrestlers visiting the troops as Tweets from wrestlers were put on the screen expressing gratitude for their service. They came back to cheering fans.
-The New Day, Kofi Kingston and Big E, made their ring entrance. Cole said they’d be at ringside to watch the Fatal Four-way match to determine whom they’d face at TLC. Cole touted the New Day’s new podcast debuting at the top of the Apple Podcast sports chart.
(2) SHORTY G & MUSTAFA ALI vs. LUCHA HOUSE PARTY (Gran Metalik & Lince Dorado) vs. HEAVY MACHINERY (Tucker & Otis) vs. THE REVIVAL (Scott Dawson & Dash Wilder)
Kofi accused Graves of “hating fun” after LHP shot silly string after hitting a springboard dive to ringside. Shortly thereafter, Heavy Machinery eliminated Metalik with the Compactor. They cut to a break.
ELIMINATION: Lucha House Party via Heavy Machinery. [c]
Big E was in Corey’s face, staring him down as he talked. They showed that during the break, The Revival attacked Otis. Later, Otis rallied and pulled off his shirt and danced. He began no-selling Dawson’s chops and did some hip thrusts. Then he gave Dawson an overhead toss and a splash in the corner. Otis then delivered his Caterpillar to Dawson. Dash tagged in and sunset-flipped Otis for a pin.
ELIMINATION: Heavy Machinery via Revival.
The two remaining teams fought at ringside where The Revival got the better of Shorty and Ali. Then they threw some words at New Day. That gave Shorty and Ali a chance to recover, so they threw Revival onto New Day. “There are pancakes everywhere!” said Cole. Everyone argued, so they cut to a break. [c]
Back live, Dawson had Shorty G grounded, but Shorty made a comeback right away. Dawson saved Dash from a leverage pin by Ali. Shorty then knocked Dawson out of the ring. Ali avoided a charging Dash and then round-kicked him in the face. Dash caught Ali with a powerslam. Ali went for a 450 a minute later, but Dawson pulled Dash out of the ring. Ali landed on his feet, tagged in Shorty G, and then leaped onto Revival at ringside. Shorty then put Dash in an ankle lock back in the ring, but Dash powered out. Dawson gave Shorty an uppercut. The Revival followed with Shatter Machine for the win. Big E continued to talk to Graves from about two inches from his face.
WINNERS: The Revival in 17:00 to earn a title match at TLC.
-The Revival addressed New Day after the match. Dash said they are taking it back to the old days by beating them in an old fashioned tag team wrestling match built on the fundamentals. Dawson said the good news is, after they beat them, New Day can go back to their podcast and talk about what it was like to be defeated by the very best team in the company. Their music played as New Day looked on from the stage.
-They went to Graves and Cole at ringside. They reacted to Revival, then shifted to a clip of the Reigns-Corbin saga from last week.
-Kayla Braxton interviewed Reigns backstage. Reigns said he goes about his business every week the same way, and if Corbin and his pals “can’t handle the big fight, that’s on them.” He said the only thing that humiliating is Corbin not being able to get the job done. He said he’s 6-6 and almost 300 pounds. He said he’s bigger and stronger than him, but he can’t handle him. He said at TLC, he’s going to embarrass him with a table, a ladder, or a chair.
(Keller’s Analysis: Had they announced the Reigns-Corbin TLC match until Reigns just mentioned it as if it is common knowledge”?) [c]
-Cole hyped that C.M. Punk would return to WWE Backstage this coming Tuesday.
-A Sheamus vignette aired where he talked about how the titans that used to rule the ring that he used to face have become pale shadows of their former selves. He said they face no real competition, no one fierce enough to stand against them, until now. “They say you can’t go home again,” he said. “I disagree because the Celtic Warriors has come home.” He said he’s ready to ravage anyone and everyone who gets in his way.
(3) LACEY EVANS vs. HALEY JONES
Before the match, during Lacey’s trip to the ring, they replayed the angle with her and Bayley & Sasha last week. Lacey won with a Woman’s Right.
WINNER: Lacey in 1:00.
-Right after the match, Sasha sauntered onto the stage. She told Lacey to stay in the ring because they have some things to take care of.
-An ad aired for Raw hyping that, after month of marital misery, a tumultuous marriage crashes to an end as the divorce of Lana and Rusev will air on Raw. [c]
-Sasha stood on the ring apron and told Lacey she was there to remind her who she is dealing with. She said she’s the blue print and the standard and the legit boss and the leader of the women’s division. Boos. She told Lacey she’s pathetic, a “Mary Poppin wanna be.” She told her not to mess with her or Bayley again. “Just because you’re a terrible role model for your ratty little six year old doesn’t mean you can come out here and interrupt me,” she said. Lacey interrupted and told her not to ever say anything about her daughter again. She said she’s not only a mother, but she’s a United State Marine. “Trust me when I tell you, honey, you don’t want me to put those boots back on.” She said the Marine Corps instilled leadership in her, so it sounds pathetic when Sasha and Bayley call themselves leaders. Lacey said if she keeps running her mouth, she’ll drop her where she stands. They trash-talked face-to-face. When Lacey teased a Woman’s Right, Sasha flinched and jumped backward. Lacey left. When Lacey got to the stage, Bayley jumped her from behind.
(Keller’s Analysis: They finally had Lacey establish herself as a babyface there, first defending her six year old daughter and own parenting, and second by citing her time in the Marines. They needed to give fans a reason to look at Lacey through a fresh lens, and that I think accomplished it.)
-They went to the announcers at ringside who threw to replay of the Bray-Miz angle earlier. Cole called it “personal, creepy, or disturbing” what Bray did to Miz.
-The announcers then hyped that Bray will defend the Universal Title against The Miz at TLC, plus Reigns vs. Corbin in a TLC match. [c]
-The announcers threw to a video package on WWE wrestlers visiting Camp Lejeune earlier today as “part of the outreach of Tribute to the Troops.”
(4) ROMAN REIGNS vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER
Cole said he can’t believe it’s almost WrestleMania season as he talked about the Royal Rumble being around the corner late next month. Ziggler grounded Reigns for the first couple minutes, but Reigns made a comeback and went for a Drive By. Ziggler side-stepped Reigns and threw him into the ringside steps. They cut to a break. [c]
Back from the break, Ziggler was still in control. Cole said Ziggler has controlled the vast majority of the match from the start. He grounded him in a chinlock. Reigns fought out of it and clotheslined Ziggler over the top rope to the floor. Reigns leaped at Ziggler at ringside, but Ziggler superkicked him out of mid-air. Suddenly, Corbin’s music played and he was carried out on a throne by six men. Graves said, “All hail King Corbin, the true leader of the Smackdown locker room.” They cut to a break. [c]
During the break, an ad aired for next week’s NXT focused on Finn Balor vs. Keith Lee vs. Tomasso Ciampa to earn a shot at Adam Cole’s title a week later. Reigns went for a Superman Punch, but Ziggler ducked and then DDT’d Reigns for a two count. They showed that Corbin was sitting on his throne on the ramp watching the match and talking a lot. After Reigns yelled at Corbin before going for a spear, Ziggler recovered and kneed him. Ziggler then threw Reigns shoulder-first into the ringpost and then hit a Zig Zag for a near fall. Reigns got down from his throne at that point and walked to ringside and then stood on the ring apron. The ref scolded him. Both Ziggler and Reigns were down. Reigns popped up and gave Corbin a Superman Punch. Ziggler rolled up Reigns for a near fall. Reigns popped up and hit a spear for the 1-2-3.
WINNER: Reigns in 15:00.
(Keller’s Analysis: A mediocre match with the expected distractions by Corbin.)
-After Reigns hit Corbin with a Drive By, the men who carried Reigns out on the throne attacked him. Graves said they’re doing the right thing protecting Corbin. Corbin then beat up Reigns at ringside, but Reigns made a comeback and set up a powerbomb onto the announce table. Ziggler superkicked Reigns to break it up. Graves said no one is coming to the aid of Reigns, which is Corbin’s point. Ziggler tried to handcuff Reigns to the ringpost. Reigns fought them off at first, but Corbin got up and helped. Ziggler gouged Reigns’s eyes. Corbin then punched away at Reigns’s ribs. Ziggler then pulled out two open cans of dog food and poured them all over Reigns’s head and shoved it into his face. “Eat up!” shouted Ziggler. Graves said Corbin promised humiliation. Fans booed.