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AEW COLLISION REPORT
AUGUST 26, 2023 (Taped 8/23)
LEXINGTON, KY.
AIRED ON TNT
Commentators: Kevin Kelly, Caprice Coleman
Ring Announcer: Dasha Gonzalez
[HOUR ONE]
-The Collision opening theme aired.
-Jack Perry walked out to his classic theme song. He waved for the FTW Title belt to be carried out like a casket behind him. Caprice Coleman, subbing for Nigel McGuiness on color commentary, talked about Taz created the FTW Title as a “renegade title” where he made up the rules rather than following them. He said Perry is trying to bury and cancel the title tonight.
When Perry entered the ring and stared at the FWT Title belt, fans chanted, “You suck!” He said these things are hard, but he wanted to talk about the good times they’ve had. He said the title has grown near and dear to his heart. He said when they look up the history of the FTW Title belt in 100 years, there will be a picture of his face right next to it. He showed a photo collage of good times he’s had with the belt. Photos were shown of him in a hot tub, a tanning bed, brushing his teeth, tanning outdoors, swimming, showering, biking, hiking, and lying in bed drinking coffee with it. He wiped away fake tears and said, “That was beautiful.” He said it’s time to send the title to a better place. He pulled a sledgehammer out from under the table. “What the hell?!” gasped Kelly.
As Perry was about to smash it, the lights went dark. Then a video aired of Hook doing pull-ups. He said that title is part of his bloodline and is important to him. He was then standing in the ring behind him when the lights came back on. He gave Perry an T-Bone suplex and threw him around the ring and into the table. Hook set up a table in the corner and then gave Perry a T-Bone into the table, breaking it in half. Hook grabbed the mic and said, “Wembley, Sunday.” He threw down the mic and walked to the back.
-A video package aired on MJF and Adam Cole.
(1) ORANGE CASSIDY & PENTA EL ZERO MIEDO (w/Alex Abrahantes) & EDDIE KINGSTON vs. BUTCHER & THE BLADE & KIP SABIAN (w/Penelope Ford)
Kelly said his secret favorite wrestler to choose on AEW’s video game is Sabian. The bell rang 14 minutes into the hour. They cut to a break at 4:00. [c/ss]
Kingston finished Sabian with a sliding elbow after a rapid-fire sequence with Cassidy and Penta also hitting signature moves on him first.
WINNERS: Kingston & Cassidy & Penta in 10:00. [c]
-Chuck Taylor and Trent Beretta joined Kingston, Cassidy, and Penta. Beretta said they’re not heading to Stadium Stampede to hug and have fun, but rather they’re going to hurt them to get revenge for hurting his mom, Sue. As Kingston was about to talk, Jon Moxley, Wheeler Yuta, Claudio Castagnoli, Santana, and Ortiz appeared on the big screen. As they talked, Kingston headed to the back to find them. Claudio called Kingston a hypocrite for blaming his mistakes on everyone else. Kingston’s partners remained in the ring. They cut to Kingston backstage yelling, “Where they at?” He demanded a guy backstage tell him. He said he’s not surprised Santana and Ortiz turned. He said he’s going to “gut them up and watch them die” in the middle of the ring at All In. He told Jon to get out of his way because he doesn’t want to hurt him because he has a beautiful wife and daughter. He told Claudio he’s saving him for last because he’s his sweetheart and he’s going to burn him and leave him scarred forever.
-Soundbites aired with FTR and The Young Bucks. They talked about their various journeys, including that FTR stood for “F— The Revival.” Dax said he holds a grudge. Cash Wheeler said the Bucks started taking digs at them because for the first time in their careers, people were questioning whether another team – FTR – was better than them. Dax said they will prove to be the absolute best tag team of all time.
(Keller’s Analysis: Nice video package. Feels like it’s coming later than ideal to add this type of context and trash talking, but better late than never.)
(2) DARK ORDER (Alex Reynolds & John Silver) vs. DARIUS MARTIN & ACTION ANDRETTI
Kelly stressed the early start time for All In on Sunday. The bell rang 35 minutes into the hour. They cut to a split-screen break at 4:00. [c/ss]
For the finish, Reynolds and Silver delivered tandem offense leading to a clean pin on Martin.
WINNERS: Dark Order in 9:00.
(Keller’s Analysis: Just a time-filler match. It was fine action-wise.)
-Lexi Nair was about to interview Darby Allin and Nick Wayne backstage when A.R. Fox interrupted. He tried to make amends. He said he was sorry. He said it took him 16 years to get to AEW and when he lost to Cassidy, he thought everybody lost faith in him including Darby. He said he lost his father, too. He said he can offer Wayne his word he is sorry. Wayne shook his head and walked off. (Good for him!) Darby said, “I know you’re sorry.” He shook his hand and then walked away.
(Keller’s Analysis: The problem with angles as gruesome and heavy as what Fox was part of when he attacked Wayne his garage with the wrestling ring is there’s just no believable way to tell a story of redemption. That was just too vicious. So I was very pleased Wayne shook his head and walked away. I don’t even think he should have heard him out like he did before walking away. It made him out to be too soft just walking away after listening to him.)
-An Acclaimed video aired hyping their six-man tag against House of Black. Max Caster said something about Brodie King “smelling his farts in large quantities,” among other digs. [c]
-A video package aired on the AEW Women’s Title match at All In, a four-way match, with each woman making their case. Saraya talked about feeling pressure because of her roots in the U.K.
(3) BIG BILL (w/Ricky Starks) vs. VARY MORALES
Kelly said Vary “better have a plan.” The bell rang 54 minutes into the hour. Vary looked to be less than half the total weight of Bill.
WINNER: Big Bill in 2:00.
-After the match Starks entered the ring with a belt. Kelly said Starks has used his suspension for good and might have branched out in his career. Starks told Morales that he reminds him of “a young Steamboat.” He said he’s reminds him what he did to Steamboat, also. He whipped him with a belt over and over. Kelly said Starks “continues to be the scourge of AEW Collision.”
(Keller’s Analysis: Starks being a manager of Bill seems to be setting up Bill to be the wrestler Punk will have to go through to get to Starks. I don’t hate the idea of Starks remaining a wrestler/manager, as that hasn’t been done in a while. It’s not something a top-top main event act would do, but the bright side is it’d give Starks more things to talk about than just himself and his matches. But maybe this is a one-off during his suspension.)
-Lexi interviewed Ruby Soho backstage. She challenged Kris Statlander to a TBS Title match at All Out.
(4) WILLOW NIGHTINGALE vs. ROBYN RENEGADE (w/Charlotte Renegade)
The bell rang 59 minutes into the hour.
[HOUR TWO]
Willow scored a near fall after a fisherman’s suplex into a bridge at 2:00. Charlotte interfered at ringside to give Robyn a brief advantage, but Nightingale won soon with a Doctor Bomb.
WINNER: Willow in 9:00.
-A video package aired with footage of All In hype in the U.K. including Saraya on a talk show. They showed fans standing in front of a big ad for All In with Sting on it. [c]
-A video package aired on the issues between Powerhouse Hobbs and Miro.
-Lexi interviewed Statlander who responded to Soho challenging her to a match at All Out. Statlander first talked about what she did on Rampage the night before and said she’s tired of being stepped on so she’ll take her out at All Out.
(5) “LIMITLESS” KEITH LEE vs. ZICKY DICE
Kelly said Lee was making his Collision debut. The bell rang 16 minutes into the hour. Dice did his hip swivel to taunt Lee. Lee led the crowd in singing “Bask in his glory.” After a minute of back and forth action, Lee won with a sitout powerbomb.
WINNER: Lee in 1:30.
-A cinematic (i.e. totally overproduced and thus fake looking) video package aired on Dralistico and Preston Vance fighting back after being kidnapped.
(Keller’s Analysis: The production values are slick when they do all these camera angles and cutaways, but it just doesn’t match the narrative structure of pro wrestling because it’s obviously not a single-camera capturing a real fight, but a staged fight scene that’s more something you’d see in a movie. It’s just the type of thing it seemed Tony Khan initially indicated he wasn’t going to do in order to create that more sports-like vibe to AEW.)
-Samoa Joe entered the ring and talked about how he was told if he interferes in the main event tonight, he’d be jeopardizing his match against C.M. Punk at All In. He said instead of sitting in the back, he’d offer his “expert services” as a commentator for the match. He ranted about Punk dressing up and attacking him last week, but vowed to remain a professional. He said he got the match he wanted from Punk and he’s going to “hand him the ass whooping you so desperately need.”
-Kelly hyped the All In line-up.
-Jim Ross and Joe were with Coleman and Kelly at ringside.
-Hook made his ring entrance first. Then Darby. Then Sting, whose AEW record was listed at 17-0. Then Punk. Boos rang out and Ross siad he’s polarizing. He had “Terry Funk Forever” written on his taped forearms. [c]
(6) HOOK & DARBY ALLIN & STING & C.M. PUNK vs. JAY WHITE (w/Colten & Billy Gunn, Juice Robinson) & LUCHASAURUS (w/Christian Cage) & SWERVE STRICKLAND & “THE MACHINE” BRIAN CAGE (w/Prince Nana)
The bell rang 36 minutes into the hour. Punk and Swerve battled first. When White tagged in, Coleman said Punk-White “is a main event everywhere.” They cut to a split-screen break a few minutes in. [c/ss]
Hook tagged in but was soon overwhelmed by the heels. They cut to another split-screen break. [c/ss]
Cage tossed Hook around for a while and flexed. Hook caught him with a T-Bone suplex and then managed to crawl over and hot-tag in Punk. Not much of a pop and quite a few boos, which Ross quickly pointed out by saying, “Fans not overwhelming excited when the controversial C.M. Punk is tagged in, but be that as it may.”
Punk cupped his ear and smiled at the boos as he rallied against Swerve with some knees and a running bulldog on the interfering White. He did more ear cupping, then kicked Luchasaurus off the ring apron. Punk then landed a top rope flying elbow and taunted the crowd afterward. He signaled for Go To Sleep. White yanked on the ref as Swerve interfered. Hook went after Swerve, but Luchasaurus chokeslammed him. Sting then gave Luchasaurus a Death Drop. White clipped Sting’s knee from behind. Darby jumped in and went after White. Cage tagged in and powerbombed Darby. Punk kicked Cage in the head and then landed a Go To Sleep followed by a sleeper. They cut to Joe snarling at the ring. He asked if the match is officially over and then charged into the ring.
WINNERS: Punk & Sting & Darby & Hook in 21:00.
-Joe went after Punk. Fans cheered. Jack Perry attacked Hook at ringside as the bell rang frantically. Hook bashed Perry with a kendo stick. Sting and Darby went after Swerve elsewhere at ringside. Darby hit Swerve with a chair. As the brawl continued, Ross touted what a PPV it’d be on Sunday night in front of over 80,000 at Wembley Stadium. Joe threw Punk into the ringside steps as Hook brawled with Perry up the steps amongst fans. Joe hit Punk in the head with the “Real World Title” belt and held it in the air before dropping it and walking up the ramp.
(Keller’s Analysis: It makes sense for the final image on Collision to be of Joe and Punk, since Punk is positioned as Collision’s biggest star and is carrying around the fraudulent World Title belt. When Collision ended, they went right to an All In hype show that AEW did a terrible job informing viewers was going to air.)
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