SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
The following report originally published 20 years ago this week here at PWTorch.com…
WWE FRIDAY NIGHT SMACKDOWN
APRIL 7, 2005
TAPED TUESDAY IN SAN DIEGO, CALIF.
AIRED LIVE ON THE CW
REPORT BY PAUL MADAVI, PWTORCH CONTRIBUTOR
This Week’s Episode: After The Mania
-Michael Cole and Tazz introduced the show as JBL walked to the ring. JBL cut a mid-ring promo. Wait a second, JBL’s didn’t marry into the family, yet the show begins with him instead of John Cena? A dejected JBL said the fans don’t realize it, but they need him and they know that because places they don’t talk about tell them that. I don’t pretty sure those places don’t talk to people about who they want the WWE Champion to be. He called himself a Wrestling God and said he wanted a rematch.
Then Eddie Guerrero’s music interrupted. He said he’ll have to go through him to get a title shot. Guerrero got a great pop from the San Diego crowd. Booker T came out, followed by Big Show, and then Rey Mysterio each making a similar statement about wanting title shots. Kurt Angle came out next, and Michael Cole, as only he can, forced that laugh as he said it was the craziest start to Smackdown ever. Angle gave Booker a hard time for not being on WrestleMania 21. He called Rey “little man” and told him you have to at least be adult size. The crowd “ohhed” at that. Angle said Sunday night after WrestleMania 21, ” I was arrested for armed robbery because I stole the show at WrestleMania.” He said he made Shawn Michaels tap and he can make anyone in the ring tap. “Oh, it’s true!” he said. JBL finally got the mic back and said, “I have absolutely no idea what you people are thinking.” He said he is on a level they can’t possibly fathom. He told them all to get out of his ring.
Teddy Long did his George Jefferson strut to the ring. Long told JBL the ring doesn’t belong to him. Long told JBL that there was a provision in his WrestleMania contact. He said he was so confident that he was going to beat John Cena, he overlooked that there was no rematch clause in the contract. Big Show let out a hearty laugh. Everyone else laughed, too. Long said it was in black and white and his high priced lawyers can check it out. JBL threatened to sue. Long told everyone they would have to earn a WWE Title match. He announced there would be a tournament on Smackdown to earn a WWE Title match. He said the first match would be JBL vs. Rey Mysterio, “San Diego’s finest.” That got a nice crowd pop. (This first portion of the report was by Wade Keller. I, Paul Madavi, pick it up from here.)
(1) Paul London defeats Billy Kidman. Paul London, the Cruiserweight Champion, makes his way to the ring first in his ridiculous fur coat and tasseled boots. Chavo Guerrero has joined Tazz and Cole at ringside. They recap how London gained the belt from Chavo. Billy Kidman then makes his way to the ring. He’s got a little bit of a beard, which looks pretty good on him actually. The championship is on the line.
Kidman starts off the action with a knee to the mid section. He punches London quickly, before eating a series of arm drags. Kidman recovers and hits a strong neckbreaker. He follows up by clubbing London’s neck and back. Kidman continues to keep pressure on London with a snapmare and stiff kick to the back. He whips London into the corner, knocking London down. London attempts to break free of Kidman with some chops, but Kidman recovers quickly. He then stands on London’s neck. London again starts to attack Kidman, but is thrown head first into the turnbuckle by Kidman. Kidman then sets London on the top rope, who manages to mule kick Kidman into the corner. London builds momentum with a flying elbow and clothesline. He follows with a hurricanrana. At this point, London is bleeding profusely from his head. Kidman recovers and ducks another clothesline from London, and hits a standing dropkick. London battles back one more time. The ref quickly takes a second out to ask London if he wants to continue. He responds affirmatively. Kidman then hits a BK Bomb. He goes for a top rope bulldog, but is countered, and back dropped. London goes for the 450 pin, but Kidman dodges, and London lands on his feet. London then rolls up Kidman for the quick 3 count pin.
After the match, Guerrero distracts London long enough for Kidman to attack him from behind. Kidman and Guerrero then attack London with kicks to the ribs.
The Breakdown
Psychology: Decent psychology was presented throughout the match. Credit Charles Robinson for asking London if he wanted to continue the match despite his gash, it added a feeling of realism to the match. The desperation victory by London made sense considering his condition, but you’d like to see the champ control the match for some measure of it, which never really happened.
Action: As usual, the cruiserweights came through on the action front. While it wasn’t as exciting as what we’ve seen from Kidman and London in the past, they did enough to keep the match feeling lively.
Entertainment: Not a bad first match for the first post WrestleMania 21 Smackdown. With London and Kidman performing, and a high quantity of blood, it was probably more than anyone was expecting from the two. Hopefully, this leads to more cruiserweight exposure.
[Commercial Break]
We return to the WrestleMania 21 recap video we’ve seen a few times now. When that is finally over with, we go backstage where Luther Reigns talks to a smattering of heels about how Big Show embarrassed the entire Smackdown locker-room by losing the sumo match. Spike Dudley’s beard is getting out of control. Reigns cuts some fat jokes on Big Show. He then hikes his shorts up and does a sumo stance. Of course, Big Show is standing right behind him. Show then challenges Reigns to an immediate match. Reigns accepts. In another corner of the arena, Torrie Wilson preps for the Diva Bikini contest.
[Commercial Break]
(2) Big Show defeats Luther Reigns. Big Show makes his entrance first, looking pretty upset about being made fun of by Luther Reigns. Reigns then makes his way to the ring. Next time you watch Smackdown, take a good look at Reign’s entirely boring entrance video. It’s shocking how little is going on.
The match starts off with a Big Show toe kick. He drives Reigns into a corner and pummels him. Reigns rolls out of the ring to recover. Show chases him, but is punched and shoved head first into the ring post. Reigns gets some offense off, but none of it fazes Big Show enough to knock him down. Eventually, Reigns hits a shoulder block that knocks Show down. However, Show gets right up and dominates Reigns with a back splash and shoulder block takedown. He then choke slams Reigns for the clean pin.
The Breakdown
Psychology: The psychology was actually good. Reigns attempted a helter skelter strategy that didn’t quite work because of Big Show’s massive size. Show did a good job of playing to his strengths as well, taking damage and picking his spots. The short match didn’t allow for much more of a story than that, but they executed it well.
Action: The action for this match was pretty dull. It was short, less than 5 minutes, and the only wrestling maneuver executed was a choke slam. There weren’t any blown moves, so that’s a plus.
Entertainment: This was okay. I understand that they needed to get Big Show some steam back after losing to Akebono, but Reign’s funny backstage jive makes me wonder if Reigns should be getting over someone as well, considering his entertainment value. But back to the match. Good psychology and poor action made for a fair to middlin’ piece of entertainment. I guess I should be glad they kept the big man match short.
[Commercial Break]
When we return, Cena makes his big championship entrance. The crowd reaction actually seems a little mixed once the big pop dies down. As Cena grabs the microphone, a quick “Cena” chant begins. Cena proclaims that “the champ is here.” Cena puts over everything JBL had accomplished in his title reign. He then reminds us that “the champ is here.” Cena then begins to cut some pretty schmaltzy populist promo. He then says he has plans for the WWE Championship belt (I hope everyone is ready for a WWE Championship spinner). Cena then climbs into the crowd and starts with The Chain Gang stuff again. He exits through the crowd once he’s done.
[Commercial Break]
ARTICLE CONTINUED BELOW…
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(3) Kurt Angle defeats Jose Quesada. This match is part of the continuing Kurt Angle Invitational. Kurt Angle makes his way out to the ring first. Kurt grabs the microphone, and cuts promo on John Cena, promising he’ll one day make him tap faster than you can say “fluke champion.” Kurt also informs us that he’ll be facing Eddie next week in the tournament. The hometown challenger then makes his way to the ring. Jose introduces himself in Spanish and gets a big pop from the crowd. Angle then asks if any of Jose’s family is in attendance, when Jose points them out, Kurt sucker punches him.
Kurt quickly hits a German suplex and Angle Slam. Kurt then applies the ankle lock with grapevine to get the tap out victory in less than one minute.
After the match, Kurt beats on Jose some more. He grabs the microphone and tells Eddie that his fate is the same as Jose’s. He tells Jose that he needs to translate “unbearable pain” for Guerrero. He then drops the microphone in from of Jose’s face and applies the ankle lock again. Kurt cuts a little more promo on Eddie and Cena before his music hits.
The Breakdown
Psychology: No psychology here, just the quickest squash match I’ve ever seen.
Action: Three well executed moves by Angle. Decent selling by Jose Quesada.
Entertainment: The microphone work by Angle was pretty good, and made the segment worth while. Angle seems hell bent on getting the title, which has always been, in my opinion, the best use of his wrestling persona.
Backstage “Miss” Jackie Gayda gets ready for the Bikini contest by rubbing up her legs with some kind of bronzative..
[Commercial Break]
When we return, Steve Romero (new broadcast colleague to Tazz and Cole), asks Carlito Caribbean Cool about his experience at Piper’s Pit at WrestleMania 21. Carlito says that one guy wearing a skirt and a bald guy wearing daisy dukes is not cool. Carlito insists he is the one who is cool. He announces that next week, he’ll be hosting Carlito’s Cabana. Anyone who wants to come down and prove their cool, can do so. Carlito asks Steve if he thinks he’s cool. Steve answers affirmatively, which promptly leads to apple in Carlito’s mouth. Steve then smarts up and renounces his coolness. Carlito spares him the face full of chewed up apple and Carlito spit.
In a locker-room, Eddie Guerrero and Rey Mysterio argue about whether Guerrero is going to be at ringside or not. Eddie is pro. Rey is con. Rey insists he doesn’t need help versus JBL, or anyone else. As proof, he mentions that he beat Guerrero on Sunday. Guerrero looks pretty upset by what Rey said. Bikini contest is next.
[Commercial Break]
When we return, Cole is in the ring. He shills the new Diva magazine, and then introduces the Diva Bikini contest. Cole looks bigger than he used to, quite a bit bigger actually. I wonder if Michael Cole is on the steroids. He’s obviously got easy access to it. Jackie Gayda makes her way to the ring first. Dawn Marie is then introduced. She’s got a gangster motif. Torrie Wilson then makes her way out to the contest. The voting is all set to begin, when the rest of the Smackdown Divas make their way out as well. Tazz tells us their names, but honestly, who gives a damn. What is it? Joy Giovanni, Michelle McCool, and Bimbo McImplant Pants, also known as Lauren Jones. Tazz is selling the whole thing like a champ. Then Cole lines the ladies up and lets the crowd decide who looks best in a Bikini. It kind of reminds me of a judge lining up the dogs at a dog show, or some other kind of contest usually relegated to sub-humans. Torrie Wilson wins the audio vote. And that it. Dawn Marie doesn’t even go nuts and kill everyone. Shameful.
[Commercial Break]
(4) John Bradshaw Layfield (w/ Orlando Jordan) defeats Rey Mysterio. JBL makes his way to the ring first, and is accompanied Orlando Jordan, the United States Champion and Chief of Staff. They do come out in the limo, even post WWE Championship. Mysterio comes out to huge amounts of pop. He’s also got the accursed 6-1-9 camera with him. Damn that camera.
The action starts off with Rey Mysterio dancing around JBL, and jumping in and out of the ring. JBL eventually catches up with Mysterio, and starts the beat down. He dominates with punches, kicks, and chops. Rey rolls to the apron, and hangs Bradshaw off the top rope. Mysterio hits a seated senton for a two count. JBL counters a charge by Mysterio with a toe kick. He attempts a power bomb, but is sent flying out of the ring by Mysterio’s head scissors. Mysterio then takes out Orlando Jordan, who charges into the ring.
[Commercial Break]
When we return, Mysterio is on JBL’s back applying a strong sleeper hold. JBL eventually knocks him down and takes control of Mysterio. JBL punches, clubs, and chokes Mysterio for several minutes. JBL hits the vertical suplex for a two count. The camera shows us that JBL is bleeding from the nose. Mysterio begins to come back, but Bradshaw stops it with a thumb to the eye. JBL continues to dominate. He connects with a fall away slam from the second rope. JBL pins Mysterio, but only gets a two count as Mysterio puts his foot on the rope. JBL goes for a power bomb once more, but Mysterio slips out. JBL follows with a big boot for a two count. The men move to the outside of the ring, where JBL pummels Mysterio some more. JBL rolls in to break the 10 count, and then gets Mysterio and tosses him in the ring. Jordan gets in a cheap shot on Mysterio as he writhes around on the apron. JBL then picks up Mysterio in a bear hug. Mysterio breaks out of the hold by biting JBL. Mysterio bounces off the ropes, but receives a back elbow for a two count. JBL then hits a very rudimentary spine buster. JBL works over Mysterio in opposing corners for a couple of minutes. He sets up the second rope back suplex, but Mysterio punches his way out. He then hits a top rope moonsault for a two count. Mysterio surges, concentrating on JBL’s knees. Mysterio follows with tilt-a-whirl head scissors. Mysterio then hits a big DDT. Mysterio drop kicks JBL in 6-1-9 position, but Jordan trips up Mysterio on the attempt. Guerrero then comes after Jordan. Mysterio once again sets up the 6-1-9, and almost gets the pin when Eddie Guerrero rushes in and goes after JBL. JBL is declared the winner by DQ.
After the match, The Bashams come running in and beat up the faces. Cena runs in and cleans out the ring.
The Breakdown
Psychology: The match had pretty good psychology. They needed some kind of dynamic device, a McGuffin, if you will, to add some interesting elements to the storyline. In any case, the simple big man versus little man psychology was well executed by both parties. They also did a good job of keeping Jordan’s cheating to a minimum, which made it more effective than the rampant cheating often displayed.
Action: The action was relatively simple, but well executed. JBL did a good job staying on the offensive most of the match without slowing down too much. They could’ve utilized Mysterio’s ability more, it would’ve upped the excitement factor. In any case, it was good not great, but well executed.
Entertainment: The match was okay. For it to be really entertaining, Mysterio would have to have been more involved on the offensive end, as good as his bump taking is. The psychology was simple but well executed, and that same description can be applied to the action. Simple but well executed does not equal entertaining, sadly.
Overall Breakdown
Psychology: The good opening segment, setting the stage for the next few weeks of Smackdown main events, was a great way to start off the show. I really like the idea of presenting a tournament whenever there’s a new champion. It takes care of motivation, and allows storylines to develop between the feuding parties. Furthermore, Kurt Angle and Eddie Guerrero both brought the notch up one peg with their microphone performances tonight. Cena’s title pick up was given decent respect, although, really, it should’ve started the show. Good choices tonight by WWE in the story department.
Action: Once again, WWE sticks its audience with only 4 matches, two of which are squashes. Kidman versus London, and JBL versus Mysterio packed in some decent good action, but it’s really not enough to cover an entire show.
Entertainment: The backstage and in-ring promo work really outshined the actual wrestling part of tonight’s Sports Entertainment package. However, without decent and plentiful wrestling, it’s hard to give the show a “thumbs up.” They did set up a good chunk of future feuds tonight, so here’s looking to next week.
Paul Madavi writes his reviews from Madison, WI where the beer is fresh, and the cheese is aged. If you’d like to respond to any of the content above, please email him and make eventful his otherwise boring existence.
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