SPOTLIGHTED PODCAST ALERT (YOUR ARTICLE BEGINS A FEW INCHES DOWN)...
WWE 205 LIVE
JULY 25, 2017
RICHMOND, VA. AT THE COLISEUM
REPORT BY JOEY GALIZIA (@RamJan89), PWTORCH SPECIALIST
Announcers: Vic Joseph, Corey Graves
JG here. And I’m actually rewatching Okada vs. Elgin in my head while I watch this “show.”
Show opens and Dasha is backstage with Cruiserweight champion Neville. We see a clip of last night’s Raw where Neville and Tozawa started trading blows until Ariya Daivari came and laid both men out. Back to the interview and Neville says that Dairvari has made a critical error. He promises that tonight he’ll remind Daivari and the rest of the WWE Universe why 205 Live is his world.
“Hail the Crown.” (I saw Dunkirk last night and would rather be stranded on a French Beach under German fire than listen to this song anymore.)
Vic Joseph and Corey Graves welcome us to the most exciting hour on television. They highlight the friendly competition between T.J.P. and Rich Swann and hype the main event tag match between Rich Swann & Cedric Alexander vs. T.J.P. and Tony Nese.
Akira Tozawa comes down to the ring to sit at the commentary table. He’s decked out in a suit and looks like he should be running for office. (I’d vote for him.) Corey and Vic ask how his shoulder is. He says it’s fine.
Ariya Daivari comes out for the evening’s first matchup. When he gets to the ring he grabs the microphone and starts speaking in Persian. He translates, saying that he doesn’t understand why Tozawa is even at 205, since the only person who deserves a shot at the cruiserweight championship is him. He promises to defeat Neville tonight, and dedicate his victory to Iranian gold medal winner, Abdollah Movahed. (He won it in 1968 in case you care.)
This brings out Neville, who doesn’t just look pissed, but ready to FEED.
(1) Neville vs. Ariya Daivari
Bell rings and Daivari immediately flees the ring. (MIND GAMES MAGAL.) He steps back in only to flee again. Neville chases him but Daivari jumps back in. They run around for a bit but Daivari eventually catches Neville coming through the ropes. Daivari than takes advantage and throws Neville off the barricades, and the ring post.
Back in the ring Daivari hits a frog-splash. Cover but only two. He goes for the hammer-lock lariat but Neville ducks and hits a superkick followed up by a running dropkick. (Feeding time.)
Up on the top rope Neville lands a flush dropkick that pushes Daivari out of the ring. Neville follows him out and drags him right in front of Akira Tozawa. Neville smashes Daivari’s head off the announcer table. As Neville begins to talk trash to Tozawa, Daivari pushes Neville into Tozawa and get back in the ring to beat the ten count.
WINNER: Ariya Daivari by countout in 3 minutes
Daivari celebrates as if he just won gold medal himself, and Neville is beside himself. He taunts Tozawa again for a fight, but the refs hold both men back from trading blows. Corey Graves still believes that Akira’s shoulder is too damaged for him to be standing toe to toe with the king.
Vic Joseph cuts us to a highlight package of last week’s 2-out of-3 falls showdown between Drew Gulak and Mustafa Ali. (Ali would emerge victorious thus ending this ridiculous feud.) Graves says that the match was so good he went back on the WWE Network and watched it 3 more times. (NERD.)
The Brian Kendrick comes out. He’s sporting a new black leather coat, a definite improvement over his Jack Gallagher costume. He takes a microphone and says that he tries to help and teach the WWE Universe what’s good for them. However, as much as he tries, no one listens. So tonight he’s brought pictures to provide further evidence that Jack Gallagher is a clown. Jack’s picture shows up on the titantron. Brian wonders if the audience realizes how pasty white Jack’s complexion is. As he says this the picture transforms into a clown, complete with wacky hair, makeup, a balloon, a bowtie, and a giant red nose.
Jack Gallagher comes out. He says that he’s been turning his cheek because he assumed that Kendrick was just blowing off some steam. However, “taking the high road with you is not an option, so I’m going to know your bloody head off.” Jack charges the ring but Brian flees. (This is the 2nd time 205 has denied the good people of Richmond a fight.
Cut to a commercial break for Raw. Triple-threat between Braun Strowman, Samoa Joe, and Roman Reigns. (HOT…DAMN.)
Back from break and Dasha is joined by Rich Swann and Cedric Alexander. Swann says that Cedric’s I-Quit match victory over Noam Dar was spectacular, and that’s why he chose him as his partner. Cedric says that he seeks the same competition that Swann and Perkins do.
Perkins and Nese roll-up. The four men engage in some friendly, albeit terrible, trash talk. T.J.’s music hits and we prepare for our main event for the evening. Tony Nese comes out next for team heel. He does three poses, and they are all insanely conceited.
Swann comes out first for team babyface. He has on his signature red smoking jacket and dances himself to the ring. (He is wearing pants for this matchup as opposed to his normal trunks. CONSISTENCY.) Cedric comes out last and we’re ready for the finale.
(2) T.J. Perkins & Tony Nese vs. Rich Swann & Cedric Alexander
Swann and Nese begin. Tie-up. Nese pushes him away and poses. Graves asks Joseph if he appreciates Tony’s physique. Vic doesn’t respond.
Nese starts the action with a shoulder bump on Swann. Swann 450s over Nese and lands a dropkick. He tags in Cedric who works over the arm. Takedown by Cedric, lateral press but only a one count. Uppercut by Cedric and Swann tags back in. They hit a double hip-toss on Nese, and then a double-dropkick.
Swann PK’s Nese in the back and then brings Cedric in again. Nese eventually tags in Perkins, but T.J. walks right into an arm-drag. He counters a move a with a corkscrew headscissor and does his patented dab. Cedric responds with a headscissor of his own sending T.J. to the outside. Cedric goes for a suicide dive and Swann goes to the top rope and they both hit dives at the same time on team heel.
Back in the ring Cedric works over Perkins but T.J. throws Cedric to the outside. Tony Nese distracts Cedric and Perkins takes advantage by Pearl Harboring Cedric. Graves commends the teamwork of Nese and T.J., and then begins to count Tony’s abs.
In control now Nese tags in and hangs Cedric in the turnbuckle. Nese does his sit-up kicks spot. Inside cradle by Cedric but Nese escapes and decapitates him with a clothesline. Perkins tags in and he focuses his attack on the head and neck. Rear chinlock by Perkins. Cedric gets to his feet and attempts a comeback but Perkins surprises him with a springboard forearm. Cover…only two.
T.J. goes for a suplex but Cedric shifts his weight to land on his feet and hits a roaring back elbow. Cedric tags in Rich and Swann runs through Nese. Kick to the gut, fameasser, and a standing frog-splash. Nese and Swann trade stiff blows. Nice sequence sees both men dip and dodge around kicks and strikes. (Seriously, this is straight out of the matrix.)
Cedric and T.J. tag back in and Cedric hits another elbow. Standing Spanish-fly by Alexander! Cover but Nese breaks it up. Swann goes after Nese but Tony throws him off the announcers table and he hits hard.
With Cedric distracted T.J. hits a chicken-wing gutbuster but Cedric responds with his handspring enziguri. Cedric goes for a springboard clothesline but Nese trips Cedric and T.J. rolls him up for the win.
WINNERS: T.J. Perkins & Tony Nese in 11:15
Cedric goes to check on Swann on the outside as the sleazy Nese and Perkins celebrate in the ring and stand tall to end the show.
JG FINAL ANALYSIS: As standard as they come, this week’s 205 flew by without anything truly memorable occurring. Daivari’s fluke win over Neville may propel him into the title scene, but it’s only a matter of time before the King utterly annihilates him. The main event had some nice spots, but it wasn’t as smooth as it should have been considering the talent involved. It wouldn’t have mattered anyway, as the Richmond crowd was far too exhausted from the Smackdown main event to truly care about the cruiserweights. It will never make sense to me why they don’t tape this show before Smackdown. NEVER.